E's Journal

Re: STICKIED: E's Journal

Yo,

I feel like you could've commanded her a bit more at your house. Remember, always tell her that taking off her shoes is not an option. Say "house rules" or something to that effect. You can even see this girl responded much better to your commands than requests here:

On our short walk I gave her my elbow, but she declined. Told her she had to take it, and she did.

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I also feel like the initial distance at your place was a problem too. You should've told her to get closer from the outset, which would've probably led to more. Good job defecting her attempts to leave though.

I always try to touch a girl a lot from the very moment we meet. It's good you gave her your elbow very soon! Try to get her out on that second date though man! She seemed into you so don't give up yet!

Jake

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Right, Jake. Should've commanded her more for sure. At my place I never tell girls to scoot closer to me; I always come to them. Definitely a mistake, thanks for bringing it up. Forgot to mention that the first time I tried to take her hand and she resisted, I tried to command her like I did with the elbow, but she still refused. By the time we got to my place, though, we were much more intimate and I should've returned to commanding.

She's from out of town, so we just had that one night...

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Saturday, November 30, 2013

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Not really much to update. Had a date yesterday, but couldn't pull because she had made plans. In hindsight I should have rescheduled because I knew she had made plans. Also, she offered me weed and I accepted because I wanted to reward her investment. Might have thrown me off. Lots of silences on that date, haha.

Two days ago I met a girl on the street and started moving towards my place until she became uncomfortable. She still wanted to hang out, just not sexually, so I gave her an ultimatum (in a socially calibrated way) and she left. I was actually pretty glad she left because I really wasn't attracted to her. She seemed cuter before I approached, and I only kept moving things forward because she kept complying.

Which brings me to the point of this post: Chase has an article on setting goals when you go out. In it he says that eventually you get to the point where your goal can be to bring a girl home. When I first read that article that statement sounded like a dream to me. It's possible to go out in the middle of the day and expect to find a girl to bring home? And now I go out in the middle of the day and expect to bring a girl home. Things have changed a lot.

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Very busy week. Little time to approach and even less to write. So let's hope I can remember...

Monday, December 2, 2013

Second date with the Taiwanese girl from November 25. Again texted to get her out the same night. Met at a lounge a block from my place. Kept her waiting. She's really cute. Told her to sit closer to me because I couldn't hear her. More touching than last time: playing with her hand, her hair, touching her leg.

She told me that she recently broke up with her boyfriend and asked me if I approach girls a lot. Somewhere in here I transitioned to talking about how great freedom is and that I love having fun. She said she's not into having fun very quickly with people she's just met. Boyfriend land.

Invited her to my place and she said no. I said yes. She said next time. I said this time. Got her to walk with me, but she again wouldn't enter my building. Hugged her goodnight, then went for the kiss. Stupid! It was clear I wasn't getting her that night, and I just made myself look needy. She rejected me... Another hug then goodnight.

Think I blew it with all that persistence and especially that failed kiss attempt. Texted her 2 days later to schedule a meet, no response.

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LR-: Friday, December 5, 2013

Met a girl yesterday during the day. She was on her way home to refrigerate some groceries she had bought. Moved her, asked her out, got a number. Told her to forget her groceries and let's grab coffee now. Some resistance, but she came. Not sure if she mentioned her boyfriend before I asked her out, but he definitely came up while we walked. She wanted to find a shop on the way to her bus stop, but that was the wrong direction from my place, so took her the opposite direction. Ended up not getting coffee, just sat at Union Square.

No hand holding because of the boyfriend thing (he came up a few more times). Other forms of touching. She told me to text her so she had my number. Told her I had to get ready for a formal company party and told her she can come chill with me at my place for a bit. She objected because of her groceries. I told her to come anyways.

We got to my place. Had her sit on the bed and showed her what I was going to wear to the party. Stupid me let her keep both her shoes and her backpack on. Got us water, sat real close to her. Played with her hair for a while. Took her glass from her hand and placed it on the floor, went in for the kiss. She leaned back, "I'm not gonna cheat on my boyfriend."

Backed off, played with her hair more, this time touching her neck, face, and ear more. Before I went for another kiss she got up to leave. Tried to get her to stay, no success. Agreed that she'd come over to watch Dexter Monday night, but I wasn't counting on it.

After she left I realized how stupid I had been to schedule so far in the future. She had actually suggested the very next day, but I said no because I had already made plans with the girl from my LR last week. But I could definitely move that engagement and I know the girl would still show up. This new girl is the one I need to move fast with.

So, even though I knew it risked conveying neediness, I texted her that evening that turns out I'm free after all, and is that still good for her? It was. We agreed on 3pm.

When we texted the next day she suggested she bring lunch. I replied that she's a such a great girl. Awesome investment.

This time when she came in I immediately had her lose the shoes and hop in bed with me to watch the show. Commanded her to get close and put my arm around her. Slowly escalating: playing with her hair, touching her neck, smelling her, taking off her scarf and touching her more, kissing her neck and ear. She wouldn't kiss me.

Put her legs on mine. Lots of resistance here; I had to fight her and forcefully pull her legs. She liked being forced into it, though. Also tried to put her arm around me, and that I couldn't force.

Massaging her feet. She won't let me take her socks off. Moving up the legs, then back down. Gonna skip forward because this is getting tedious to write. Bottom line: mountains of resistance, every step a battle. In the end I got her to kiss me. Undressed, got her playing with my dick then sucking it. Finally got my hand down her pants; she came so quickly once I started fingering her it was amazing. Then she finished me off. She was fully dressed the whole time, the only items I managed to get off were her socks, which I had to forcefully take off. This took about 2 hours. Then we were finally able to watch some dexter.

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Sunday, December 8, 2013

Had the girl from my LR 2 weeks ago come over and gave her the time of her life. Made her squirt, which she'd only ever done before when being fingered, not fucked. She came so many times it was great to watch. Texted me after: "That was amazing. Quite a pleasure. Good night, E"

I think I have myself a regular.

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FR: Saturday, December 14, 2013

Date with this one girl. Met her a month ago. She was on her way to work, so had her sit down with me for a few minutes then set up a date for 2 days later. She cancelled on me. Texted her a few days later, no response.

Luckily I ran into her on the street 2 nights later. This was right when I started holding girls' hands. Walked with her, held her hand, suggested we grab drinks. She said yes, but I also found out she had to take BART home, and those would stop running soon. Figured I wouldn't have time to pull, so I told her that actually I was tired, but we should meet up the next day instead. She agreed, kissed goodnight. Next day she cancelled on me...

Texted her a few days later, no response. Figured it was over unless I ran into her on the street again. Just in case, pinged her again 1.5 weeks later and she responded. Set up this date.

So met at a lounge a block from my place. At the lounge things went exactly like they did last time we met: she was super compliant, we had fun, and I did a lot of touching. Invited her home at the end and she declined. Pushed pushed pushed, got her to come with me. Got as far as the lobby of my building when she said she wouldn't come upstairs. Pushed pushed pushed, no luck. Agreed to see her 2 days later. Of course she cancelled on me again... Texted her again yesterday, no response.

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FR++Sunday, December 15th, 2013

Before I get to the FR++, I want to mention one approach I had today. I was walking down the street and saw this girl turn to look at me as she passed. Clearest approach invitation I've ever received. In fact, it was so clear I was sure she knew me. Figured I had approached her before.

So I turned around; she slowed down to wait for me with a small smile on her face.

me: Hi (playing it safe, didn't remember her)
her: How's it going?
me: Remind me your name?
her: I haven't said it yet.
me: Haven't we met before?
her: No.
me: You look familiar.

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Reckoned this must not be a reapproach after all so just did my thing. Moved her, bit of deep diving, asked her out. One of my smoothest approaches; she was nervous and seeking my validation. Unfortunately she had plans and was leaving town that night for a month. Hopefully she'll remember me when she returns.

Now on to the FR++:
This girl was shopping, reacted great to my opener. Took her to sit at Union Square. On the way I took her hand and she started laughing. Didn't pull away though. Our whole time together she would laugh for no reason, like she couldn't believe this was happening. Which makes sense, haha. I kept it so sexual.

Invited her to watch a movie. Right as we started walking she mentioned a theater, and I said no no, netflix. She hesitated a bit, but I played it off and didn't give her time to think. Led her, asked a question to get her talking, then took her hand again once we'd walked a bit.

Made it back to my place, got in bed. Put on Zoolander, which was a terrible mistake haha. Forgot how dumb it was. Not even funny. What's a good movie to watch with these girls (needs to be available on play now)?

Anyway, it was a battle to get her nestled close to me. My fault, I wasn't smooth enough about it. Started touching her hand first and her arm and hair. Then started kissing her neck. She wasn't stopping me, but wasn't getting into it. Then she said something about whether I do this often, don't remember exactly how she put it.

I kept going for a while, then paused the movie. Gave her some sort of hard sell, wish I remembered more details, I need to write these reports right after they happen. That killed things. Won't do it again. She got up to leave and I walked her to where she needed to go (in a non-needy way). It was quite a long walk, so I had some time and maybe I salvaged things. We parted on decent terms.

This girl went along with all my leading, but I could tell the whole time that she wasn't completely comfortable and in the moment. Her logical mind was telling her that moving so fast is weird. How do I fix that?

At any rate, I have a fuck buddy who's crazy about me. Girl from my LR is a regular customer, which both keeps me more content and feeling abundance, but also diminishes my motivation to go out.

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FR: Saturday, December 21, 2013

Met this girl at Union Square at 7. Goal was to sit there for a bit, then either invite her to grab a drink or straight home, depending hon how things go. Hadn't counted on her being hungry, though; since it was 7 she assumed it was a dinner date. Actually, thinking back on it, since she was so compliant I should have suggested we pick out some groceries together and cook at my place. Didn't think of that, though, so we went to my regular lounge, where we ordered drinks and she ordered food.

Right away the bartender misplaced her id, but claimed that he had returned it, so we went through 15 minutes of her looking for it and becoming more and more frustrated until he finally realized that he hadn't returned it after all. Bad start. Then her food came it was a bit awkward that she was the only one eating.

I got things back on track, though, and she kept complying. Forgot to mention that she offered to pay for everything, including my drink. So later she said that second round was on me, and I suggested we have the second round at my place. But the damn bartender again made my life difficult by taking so long to bring a box for her leftovers that we weren't in the moment anymore.

We got outside when she said she wouldn't come home with me, but we should hit up another bar. Not interested in moving backwards. Kept walking towards my place. She wouldn't come in, suggesting again that we find another bar or that we could call it a night. So I agreed to call it a night and we hugged. I think she was surprised when I held my ground and ended the date.

After all that investment she put in, she's probably either really into me right now, or in auto rejection. And based on the fact the she didn't return my after-date text, I'm guessing it's number 2.

Lessons:
I pulled at the wrong time. Things were sexual, but not SUPER sexual. I need to get them horny.
I should have gone for the kiss when we parted (I think?).

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Hey determined! Just been reading the first page of your journal, but i get the impression that you're definately a natural with women keep going

When i first read about you blowing kisses to women, i thought that was a really cheesy thing to do, but girls seem to love it.
So, could you describe how you do your 'blowing a kiss' technique please?

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Hi Ryan,

Not sure who's journal you're reading haha, but I was definitely NOT a natural at this.

On blowing kisses, I almost never do that anymore. Nowadays if I do it, it's only after a girl rejects me, if we're still flirty and on friendly terms when we part and I catch her looking back at me or make eye contact from afar later. Not trying to accomplish anything by it, just having fun. But blowing a kiss might still be useful as a preopener in some cases, when it's not forced.

As for technique, I don't know, I would just blow a kiss normally. It's important that the girl be looking at you before you do this, and you must make it seem spontaneous. If the girl thinks that you were sitting there waiting for her to look over so you could blow her a kiss that's creepy.

Imagine a guy either walking down the street or sitting with his buddies, in the moment and minding his own business, when he spots a girl looking over at him and they make eye contact and exchange a smile. He pauses for a second, smiles to himself, then blows her a kiss. Then he either motions her over or walks over himself.

Girls do love it, not sure if it's any more effective than just motioning her over or walking over yourself. Fun, though, for sure.

Hope that helps.

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On another note, I think I jinxed myself last week when I wrote that I have a consistent FB. She texts me Sunday that she's seeing someone and can't come over. She's "tired of sleeping around and I'm sweet, but she wants more." Strangely, I don't really care. I was down for an hour or 2, then went back out and actually had one of the most fun evenings approaching ever. Shitty results, I was just in a great mood and having a blast. And girls were responding, I just didn't meet anyone single with good logistics.

It's Christmas season - all the students have gone home for break and the tourists are all families or couples. I can spend a whole weekend day out and only find a handful of girls to approach. Luckily, my success rates are better now so I'm still getting some dates, but not pulling nearly as many numbers as I did in late fall. Having a blast, though. Here's hoping for more plentiful pickings!

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FR: Sunday, December 29th, 2013

Met a girl yesterday night and sat with her at Union Square. It was ON. Very soon into it she asked if I wanted her number. I answered, "Not yet (smile and pause), let's go sit by the Christmas tree." However, she lives an hour away and it was 9:45pm; she had to head home. She asked if she could give me her number, and I replied teasingly, "You can if you want to." And like a jackass, I let her go. Didn't even invite her home. Just agreed she'd come back today. Of course she flaked. It was so on...

I NEED TO GET IT IN MY FUCKING HEAD THAT IT'S NOW OR NEVER! Obviously a girl who lives an hour away isn't going to drive all that way just to see me. PERSIST! GRAB THEM AND KISS THEM!! Why don't I see this in the moment?

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LR-: January 2nd, 2013

First approach of the night. Very attractive girl. I took a long time to approach and almost chickened out. She was very polite when I opened and even stopped walking, but didn't seem very excited. Followed my lead though - moved, started walking, then came to sit with me at Union Square.

She was waiting to pick something up from a friend, and when he called that he was across the street she asked if I wanted to come. I asked if she was coming back, and she said "Sure." So I stayed. Suggested we grab a drink and she agreed.

Not sure exactly when I realized that it was on between us, maybe on the walk to the pub. But she went from just being polite and friendly to giggling and giving strong eye contact. Based on her initial lack of excitement, I really wasn't expecting this approach to go anywhere. Strange how she opened up, very strange that I had no clue it was coming.

So we went to this bar and had a drink, with me escalating physically a bit, but not much. I could see that she wanted me to escalate, so I held back. Tension. LOTS of staring into each other's eyes.

I felt a high point, but we were still in the middle of drinking, and as the sexual energy began to fade I worried that I would lose her. So I leaned back and relaxed, then while we waited for the check I took her hand and stared into her eyes. Turned the tension right back on.

Invited her home for round 2 of drinks. When we got there I asked if she really wanted a drink or if she preferred to just chill. Just chill, good.

Went for the kiss pretty quick. So easy. Pulled back, then put her legs on mine, then another kiss, then put her on her back.

She was on her period and wouldn't take off her pants, although I tried a few times. She kept saying that it was really tempting and I was sexy. She also mentioned something about morals, went something like, "We've just met, so next time. But I am shirtless so maybe I should check my morals." I asked, "What's wrong with moving fast?" Just stared at each other for a bit. She said multiple times that we'd have sex next time. I answered, "If you're good." She asked multiple times if I would see her again next week. "If you're good." I'm sure Chase could have gotten her pants off, but I'm not sure what I should have done differently. I tried to passionately tear them off at a high point, too. No go.

Anyways, got her shirt off and all of my clothes off. Had some fun until she had to go to catch her bus. Great time, hottest girl I've ever been with, and she was more into me that I was into her! I'm starting to notice that when I'm successful, I don't have to do ANTYTHING. All this game is really just about finding a girl who already likes you and knowing how to move things forward.

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Nice one, E

When you invited her home - did you say "my place"? Did you have to persist to bring her home?

~Nick

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Hey E,

Great LR! I wouldn't worry too much about not getting sex. First date sex is the goal, but that doesn't mean you failed or struck out with the girl if you didn't have sex. This girl clearly wants to see you again and have sex with you. Get her out within the week and have her screaming your name

I'm starting to notice that when I'm successful, I don't have to do ANYTHING. All this game is really just about finding a girl who already likes you and knowing how to move things forward.

Click to expand...

This. So much this. Its worth it to post your LR on the Field Reports board so that people can see this. When you know what your doing, seduction shouldn't be hard. It should be effortless. Its a huge step forward realizing this. And I also see you are getting some abundance mentality too.

Lots of great stuff here!

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Nick,
I said, "Second round at my place?" That's it, then a bit of discussion about what kind of drinks I had, which we didn't even end up drinking. I knew she'd say yes before I asked.

XC,
Put it up, along with some more details I forgot to mention.

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FR: Sunday January 5th, 2014

This weekend I got 2 indications that my fundamentals are becoming tight.

#1. Saturday I was walking back to my place and passed 3 girls standing by a club. I noticed one who was stunning, but thought to myself that "Eh, she's with her friends, so I'll pass." But as I walked by she met my eye contact and smiled, so I had no choice.

I turned around after a few steps and motioned over, no words. She said no, she's with her friends, but she said it warmly, as if the fact that some strange man just beckoned her over wasn't creepy or unreasonable at all, just a bit cocky (and attractive). Which is awesome, because that kind of nonverbal approach can easily come off as creepy.

So I approached closer and started talking, first to her, then a tiny bit to her friends, then lasered back in on her, full attention. And the friends took a step back and pretended to play with their phones! No protectiveness, no cockblocking, just left us alone. Found out this girl has a boyfriend and is leaving the country next week to study abroad, but it was her and her friends' reactions that mattered. I was on point!

#2. Then yesterday I went with my family to see Cirque du Soleil, and before the show one of the dancers was standing near our section. She had a long feather in her hand and singled me out to tickle with it. I winked at her and she blew me a kiss.

Other than that, met up with a girl tonight after the show. She's French here visiting family and leaves Thursday. She had to catch the ferry to her family's city, and the last one leaves at 7:30 on Sundays, so by the time I got out of the show I only had time to walk her to the pier, so I just took the opportunity to create more comfort and escalate physically; when we first met Wednesday she was uncomfortable with how fast I was moving and wouldn't even hold my hand. On the walk I held her hand, touched her hair, and put my arm around her. She put her arm around my waist, too. We agreed she'd meet me for lunch tomorrow if her uncle can drive her to the ferry (cross your fingers). I plan on having us cook together.

I've mentioned before that girls keep commenting on my eye contact, telling me to stop looking at them because I'm embarrassing them. Well, this one put it a great way: "Stop looking at me like that, like I'm a toy." Ahaha.

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FR: Monday, January 6th, 2014

French girl couldn't make it, and now she's back in France. By the time she got to SF and found wifi to talk to me it was too late for anything substantial. Plus I had a date already scheduled.

Met this girl a month ago and got her number, but she was leaving town for a few days. Texted her when she got back, set up a date, then she texted me last minute that she couldn't make it. Didn't respond when I replied.

So I figured it was probably over, but I texted her on Christmas just in case and got an enthusiastic response. So set up a date for yesterday, had to cancel on her, and moved it to this evening instead.

She had a meeting which was supposed to end at 6, but she kept texting me that it was taking long, and it didn't end until 7:45. Then she drove to Union Square to meet me. She texted me when she was entering the city, and I replied "Cool," waiting for her to text me that she had arrived, or with an ETA. Eventually I texted her and found out she was waiting for me. In my stupid bid to seem non-needy by not texting first I made the poor girl wait 40 minutes for me. Oops. Now by the time we actually met we only had about 1:30 tops before she had to leave.

Date started off coolly, understandably, but I warmed her up. Sat her first at the square, then at a bar. The mood was ok, but not great. She wasn't making full on eye contact most of the time. Decent conversation, but again not great. Played with her hand and her hair. When the check came I put my card down, and she offered to split it. "Sure." Tried to turn her on by stroking her upper back while we waited.

Also, at one point she asked me about the last girl I dated, so I took the opportunity to frame myself as lover material. I told her about how I met this girl on the street, had a great time together for about a month, then she found herself a boyfriend because she wanted commitment and I wasn't ready for that.

By the time we got done at the bar it was right at the end of her 1:30 allotment, but I went for it anyways. I'm running my interactions from now on like it's now or never. I told her I wanted to show her some paintings I'd mentioned earlier, and she said, "No!" playfully. She then hugged me, and I went for the kiss. "No!" It wasn't happening. So I bid her goodnight.

I had fun and I know she did too, but the spark wasn't here. Overall, just not sexual enough.

Now I'm posting this and it's already Sunday. The next day I texted her for a second date and she said she'd like to remain friends. I declined.

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Saturday, January 18th, 2014

My FB is back. She texted me Tuesday, "E. It's been a little too long." This morning she came over for a little fun.