Sunshine Journal

[JT Sunshine]

I think starting a journal on here is a fantastic idea, as it will give me a chance to recap my days/nights, hold myself accountable for going out, taking action, and hopefully gain some insight along the way. Going to use this as more of the "story" of my journey, as opposed to specifics I'll be posting in the FR section (although I will be tracking my monthly progress with a statistics-based system I've came up with - more on that later).

For anyone who reads this, I'm 33, live in a large city in the north-central US, and am getting back into this after a decade-long hiatus (had a couple reeeally long LTRs). I will be re-starting my journey solo, and treating it as if I'm a total newbie. A rebirth into the game, if you will. I am going to do the newbie assignment, although may do two assignments some days and skip other days due to a wacky work schedule. I am ten times more familiar with night game, but plan to do some day game as well, especially as the weather warms up and the hotties come out of hibernation.

My end goal: drop me in any city on earth, on any given day, and I want the skills to be able to wake up the next morning with a beautiful stranger in my hotel bed. A year from now my job will take me all over the world, so I need to develop those skills now. I am beyond excited for this journey.

*Names of people and places will be changed to protect the innocent.*

Day 1: Observation.

The first place I chose for my scouting mission was my old favorite place to game back in the early twenty-teens. I can't believe it's still there and going fairly strong.

Legacy Club​

Overview:
This was my go-to downtown bar in 2012. It was a great mix of bar/club/patio when the night was right, but I remember it took a big hit during covid and seems as though it has not fully recovered. I have pulled from here a few times, mostly patio and once off the dance floor. As it stands in early 2024, it feels more viable as a solo option on busy nights. Also, might be a good warm-up spot, or bounce location later in the night... although I am hoping it pops off this summer.

Pros:

• Cheap cover
• Large patio with heat
• Dance floor with stripper poles
• Great basement bar & roof patio (bar is not open - maybe because winter?)
• Some hot girls
• A couple of hot bartenders, will make the trip more worth it if a slow night
• Mixed-aged clientele, won’t stand out as “old” in my 30s
• Beer girls, decent priced beer (I do like to have *one*)
• Close together bathrooms that cause gender commingling

Cons:

• LOTS of dudes
• As memory serves me, some nights are super dead
• Half the main bar is obstructed by the dance floor
• Music isn’t loud enough to pack the dance floor
• Seating in weird/inconvenient places
• Weird music/inconsistent DJ-ing

Tips/Realizations:

• Probably avoid the dance floor, unless it’s SUPER busy. It was full of angry looking dudes just standing around. The hot girls were on the stripper poles. Better dance floor at next location.
• Dance floor sidebar should be avoided. It’s isolated, mostly dudes on their phones, and service is too fast to cause a line (where I used to find it really easy to talk to girls). Stick to the congested north end of the main bar (girls, girls, girls!)
• The highest volume of opportunities to open seem to be when walking from the front to back or vice versa. High traffic, lots of good eye contact.
• Patio fills up more after 1am. More insights once it warms up.

I said a simple "hi" or made small talk with six girls here (I'm very rusty and working on my nerves). Mostly 7s with one 9 on the looks scale, I would say four of them reacted positively to me, and two were neutral.

"Next" Bar​

Overview:
"Next Bar" is the newcomer downtown club, replacing an old haunt in the same location. Seems to have become the busiest club downtown. Its main draw is the loud and wild dance floor. Young crowd, lots of cute girls, lots of dude bros. No pulls… yet.

Pros:

• PACKED, at least by midnight
• Lots of hot girls, trendy looking people
• Large bar, and small upstairs bar/loft
• Vaping is basically encouraged (and my guilty pleasure)
• Music is fucking LOUD
• Dancefloor is packed out
• Darts/jenga/beer pong in the loft could create opportunity for good situational openers (will field test)
• No cover

Cons:

• No patio
• Awkward tables between the bar and dancefloor make it hard to walk anywhere
• So many people it takes forever to get on/off the dancefloor
• Lots of pushy bros on the dance floor
• If not dancing or getting a drink, not much else to do on the main level
• Hottest girls always on the “stage” area (I'm starting to notice a pattern...)

Tips/Realizations:

• Good place to amp up state by vibing on the dance floor.
• Good place to practice dance floor game.
• Outfit, high energy, good body language and eye contact will be key here as it’s hard to talk on the loud floor.
• Converse at the bar, or upstairs.

I said "hi" to one girl here, easily a 9.5 on the looks scale. Reaction was neutral. Still a win for me.

Saloon Bar​

Overview:
Can’t believe I've never been here. It is impossible to see from the street how fucking HUGE this place is. Country vibes but not over the top. I couldn’t believe how many cute, bangable girls were in there, and the lack of what appeared to be any dudes with a hint of game. If I can get good, this will be a fishing barrel.

Pros:

• LOTS of hot, young college and country-type girls
• Great girl/guy ratio
• HUGE bar with three floors and a patio
• Live music
• A couple of cute bartenders
• Some real STUNNING girls

Cons:

• Was dying off by 120am
• Roof patio was dead (cold) and closed early
• Main floor bar isn’t great
• Band stopped playing at 1am
• I don’t know a ton of the music

Tips/Realizations:

• Get here earlier. I should aim for 1130 at the latest.
• I am thinking the bar line by the stage will be the best pickup location, or the rooftop in the summer.
• May need to adjust/calibrate my wardrobe slightly for this place - could be fun. Will field test.
• Definitely a haven for 21-23 year olds. And what I lack in youthful exuberance I make up with in wisdom

Said hi to two girls here, average looks were an 8, one reaction was neutral and one was extremely positive (we actually talked for 5 minutes and flirted a bit). She was so fucking cute too. Massive motivation to keep doing this.

The Street (Downtown, 1am-2am)​

Since the assignment dictates finding four locations, I figured I would scout the street.

Nothing like it used to be, but it's still cold out and could get much better once the weather warms up. Will not rule it out, as there *were* girls. I did manage to make brief situational openers to 4 girls, got two laughs. I would say two reactions were positive, two were neutral.

--------------

I call the Day One assignment a huge success!! I will be repeating this mission with a focus on daygame soon, maybe during the phase where I work on posture/eye contact. I am already having so much fun. Stay tuned!

JT

 

[JT Sunshine]

Day 2 & 3: Posture & Eye Contact

I figured since I had some extra free time (and the looming trip to the middle of nowhere that will sideline me for a couple of days), to combine days 2 and 3. Learned quite a bit.

Decided to take a stroll around the large nearby mall to see what it was like in the morning. With my life/schedule, night game (where I am most comfortable) is not always an option, and it would be sweet to find an indoor weekday morning goldmine. Also I hate the cold. Turned out to be a bit of a bust, but a nice learning experience. In an hour of walking around I saw maybe 6 bang-able girls, mostly from a distance. One I knew I should have opened, but oh well. I did talk to two others who were both working (not the assignment) and they seemed rather bored/preoccupied.

I made a point to focus on my posture, to stand tall and confidently without making it look robotic or forced. I found myself getting into “location-scouting” mode however, and kind of lost the objective.

Some realizations - a good mall opener could be to grab a random clothing item and ask a girl if it looks good on me. Or go up to random girls and ask them where their favorite place to eat at the mall is, etc. Also the morning is probably a terrible time, and later in the day, or weekend day time may be a gold mine. Will investigate further. (And I did…)

Time to run errands, why not try more good posture and go for some eye contact. First store there were no females shopping, but did strike up a conversation with a cute cashier. She liked my hoodie and asked me if it was a new release. Lots of IOIs. I feel myself gradually improving. Will keep pushing.

Next went to a big grocery store. Reminded myself to stand tall, and walk confidently with purpose. I wanted to see if my body language had any noticeable effect on the people around me, versus what I am used to doing (slouching). I never once moved out of anyone’s way, and almost to my surprise, EVERYONE moved out of my way. I am not a big dude by any means. This was quite the interesting experience.

I was able to make eye contact with 5 different girls and hold it until they broke it with me. Two were super cute. Of the super cute ones, one looked away, and one looked away, then down. Of the others one looked away, one looked down, and one held until some old guy walked in between us and broke the eye contact what I realized here is that it takes some practice with timing to make eye contact with a girl at the exact moment she looks at you. I will keep working on this.

Next up, back to the large mall, but this time in the evening. The goal: continue to work on my posture, observe the posture of others, and get my last 4 eye contacts, if not more.

It was much more crowded, albeit a lot of the crowd was families. I wanted to try two experiments here primarily - confidently walk opposite the “flow” of traffic and see if people make way for me, and find hot women with an apparent boyfriend/husband, and observe their body language.

The first thing I noticed was how apparent it was when people had horrible posture. Shoulders shrugged, chest in, hunched over or simply a tired, shuffling walk. I thought to myself, “do any of these guys look like they get p***y?” No. Not one of them did.

Confidently walking opposite the flow of traffic was one of the coolest this I’ve ever done. 98% of people simply parted the Red Sea and let me walk by. One guy let me go in front of him on the escalator, and afterwards I realized his friend was standing in front of me, and I was now between them. It seemed he just felt that compelled to make way for the confident-looking guy. The only two people who didn’t move were an old guy who had to be pushing 6’6” (didn’t budge), and a dude who was walking very fast and appeared very angry.

I found two women in particular who were very attractive, both with what appeared to be their husbands. Both men had very confident body language. Shoulders back, standing tall, relaxed. There’s something to this, I reckon…

One woman was of particular beauty, and we made eye contact for a split second. I felt this crazy tingling adrenaline surge through my body, as if the universe was telling me THIS is the girl for me. I actually loved the feeling, and the next time I feel it when I see a woman who is *not* with their husband and two small children, I am going to play that one to win.

Got eye contact with 5 more people, a couple women, a couple of men. I was able to hold all until they broke first.

Okay I feel as though I’m rambling now. Final realizations: I definitely felt I exuded some type of “presence” while walking confidently. I was no longer invisible. I am going to have to get used to the feeling of being the observed, and not the observer. Also, this mall may not be the best place to game. I may try one of the many smaller, higher end malls around town. Lastly, day game is probably going to be WAY harder for me, so I may run an entire separate newbie mission simply for day game after I complete these initial 14 challenges while doing both day/night.

Until tomorrow, JT out!

 

[JT Sunshine]

Day 4: "Hi" (FU Report)

Don't even know where to begin with this one. For someone who actually spoke to multiple women on my day one assignment, I let myself down tonight. I am beyond mad at myself for SEEING THE OPPORTUNITIES present themself right in my f-king face, and I did not do a damn thing about them. I froze up all night. This is my major sticking point, and one I have to solve. I want to scream, cry, bash my head into the wall... but I am going to use tonight as raw motivation to stop giving a F*CK about anything the stupid little negative voice in my head says, and SOLVE THIS ISSUE.

Welcome to my stream of consciousness rambling. This is not a story of success like I wanted it to be... but I promise, to myself and anyone reading, that this is the turning point in my life. The last straw. The moment I stop rejecting MYSELF and start actually going for what I want! I've done it in my career. I made my four year old self proud by working my ASS off to actually have my dream job, to live out the childhood fantasy of what I wanted to be when I grew up. Who does that?? I can do anything I set my mind to. I must set my mind to this, and attack it with the drive and work ethic I have given everything else in my life. WHY is this so hard for me??

I went out tonight with the objective of saying "hi" to six cute girls. I did not meet the objective. I can do one of two things - let this send me into a period of massive depression, or use it as motivation to go harder than I've ever gone before and literally solve the only problem in my life. TALKING TO WOMEN I DON'T KNOW

When it comes to a "warm" approach, I'm golden. Funny, charismatic, people seem to hang on my every word. But for some reason when I'm out by myself, I have this overwhelming fear of talking to strangers. I know they would love me if they got to know me!! Maybe if I just opened my mouth something wonderful would come out

Got done with work/errands later than I wanted to tonight, didn't make it downtown until there was only a couple hours before bar close. I was feeling good tho. Went to the country bar I wrote about in my first post - and it was PACKED. Easily 150 girls there I would sleep with without even blinking an eye. I consciously walked tall, confident, and made eye contact with a couple REALLY attractive girls. I think I had a happy expression on my face, things seemed to be promising. People were moving out of my way like they did at the mall. However, ended up next to a cute girl by the bar in a fun hat, and instead of saying "Hi, I love your hat" I just stood there. The longer I stood there, the more uncomfortable I felt. She paid for her drink and walked away. I went to the patio and did make a funny comment to a guy in a mixed group, but didn't follow it up with anything.

Left that bar and headed towards my old favorite, hoping a different setting/vibe might snap me out of my introverted-ness. The one thing I was very happy with tonight is the bouncer just let me in - no asking for ID or charging cover. I am convinced it is because last weekend I actually talked to him, I have a great, put together "look" (that stands out without being over the top), and he recognized me. Bunch of people were in line waiting to be carded. And he let me right through.

I went into the bar and it was maybe 60-70% as full as it was during my scouting mission. I certainly could have opened the three girls on the patio, but I didn't. I froze. FML. Talked to a couple of bartenders a bit, then left. Told the bouncer to have a good night and I appreciated him.

Went down the street to the new club. The line was long asf earlier, now, not so much. Put myself in a great position to open two cute girls by the bar, but froze up. Again. Decided to vibe out on the dancefloor. I was rocking out to some top 40 song. A dude complimented me on my watch. Dope. The lyrics of the song playing said "put your hands u-u-u-upppp" and a cute girl was staring at me with a smirk. I put my hands up and started vibing. She looked me in the eyes and said "hell yes!" with an even bigger smirk. Just then her boyfriend/friend/brother/dude/whoever grabbed her hand and dragged her off the dance floor..

Here is where I hit my breaking point...

I was still vibing out and definitely getting some attention from females. A blonde (I love blondes, btw) came and stood RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. By herself. Looking lost. She was WAITING to be opened, but I didn't open her. I froze. I just kept dancing like the timid ass, introvert I've become. Then I watched her get opened by three different guys - and the last one ended up heavy making out with her, and leading her off the dance floor.

That could have been me... she should have been with me... she WANTED to...

I am done with my fear, my anxiety, my brain that moves at fucking light speed and talks me out of doing simple things, like talk to a woman who is COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY INTERESTED IN ME. I'm done!! I know in my heart, my soul, that I am a catch. I'm actually pretty damn handsome, funny, and any girl would be lucky to spend a day or night with me. I should NOT have these issues!! But I do, big time, and it's on me to solve them...

This is the turning point in my life. The moment I stop giving a flying f*ck about anything and just go for what I want. Mark my words, it starts now. I am going to take the massive letdown tonight was, and use it as fuel to ignite the fire inside me. I will crush this day 4 newbie assignment once I get back from my stupid easter trip to the boons. The snow is melting and the hotties will be out. I am running out of excuses, and am not getting any younger.

I WILL SOLVE THIS

 

[JT Sunshine]

Well… back on the positive side of momentum! I talked to a woman at the store today I said “hi”, and asked her what her favorite flavor of juice was (she was standing by a bunch of juice). Made small talk for about a minute about mango mimosas and eventually it fizzled out. I just said “nice to meet you” and left.

Let’s keep it going…!

 

[ZenRising]

Hey there JT,

Like you I'm making my way back into the game after a long haitus and series of LTRs.. I look forward to reading your progress!!

 

[JT Sunshine]

Hey there JT,

Like you I'm making my way back into the game after a long haitus and series of LTRs.. I look forward to reading your progress!!

Thanks Zen!

I enjoyed your journal too, and look forward to reading more! Good to see some others here in the same boat as me

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

I'm impressed JT ... you seem to have exactly the right attitude. It's just another problem to be solved, no different than any other.

 

[JT Sunshine]

I'm impressed JT ... you seem to have exactly the right attitude. It's just another problem to be solved, no different than any other.

Thank you Casanova!

It’s a skill I’ve always wanted, but didn’t give myself the time to get super good at back in the day. I’m sure there will be many ups and downs but I just have to remember that this is something that can be learned, like anything else

 

[JT Sunshine]

March Recap

As part of journaling my progress, I started a spreadsheet to track different metrics of my interactions. I am going to do this every month and try to top my previous month, as well as hopefully identify some trends, and maybe some sticking points. I won’t go into full detail, just a recap.

The Stats:

- Approaches: 16 (13 night, 3 day)
- Average “looks” rating: 6.9 (ranging from 5-9.5)
- Reactions: 1 very positive, 9 positive, 6 neutral
- Of the 8s and above, 50% reacted positively to the open
- I was the one who ended the interaction 10 times, she ended the interaction 2 times, and 4 of them just kept on walking
- Of the total girls opened, 50% were by themself and 50% were in a groupsize ranging from 2-4 people, however I never opened the full group.
- Blondes made up 37% of my opens, brunettes 56%, and one with black hair.
- 50% of my opens appeared to be in the 21-25 year old age range, with the youngest being 18-20 and the oldest being 41-45
- My best interaction opened with me saying (situationally): “I’m trying so hard not to put my arms up here so they don’t get soaked”
- No numbers, dates or closes

Realizations/Sticking Points:

Treat March as a warm-up month. That’s 16 more opens than I’ve done in the last year (or more) and I should be proud of myself. April is wide open to blow these results out of the water.

I am ending the interactions too early. Instead of pushing myself, controlling the frame and leading, I am so focused on just trying to *open* that I’m not progressing the interactions as far as I should. This will be my main goal in April - to keep every interaction going for a *minimum* of 5 minutes.

I need to practice street day game a LOT more. I was unable to stop a moving girl/set. I need a lot of work in this area.

A large percentage of girls are actually reacting positively to my open. All of them were “hi” or situational - nothing direct or old-school indirect (eg: who lies more, men or women?). I will try these styles out too and see what results I get.

Half of the girls I find quite attractive are reacting positively to my approaches. Not one gave me a nasty blowout. I really like these odds.

Learning Moment:

The best interaction I had was with a brunette 8.5 in a beautiful blue dress at the “Saloon” bar. As previously stated, I opened with “I’m trying so hard to not put my arms up here so they don’t get soaked”. We were both standing at the bar. Her eyes told me she liked what she saw, and we bantered a bit about the dirty bar. She intentionally spilled a half empty drink and said “oops”, to which I replied “I knew you were the bad one”, delivered with a smile. She gave me a little hip-check and I playfully hip checked her back. The bartender saw her spill the drink and handed her a rag, at which point she actually started to clean up the bar. I egged her on “keep going, keep going, just like that”. We bantered a bit more but hit a dead spot in the conversation, and feeling uncomfortable with the silence, I put my hand on her arm and said “I’ll come find you later”, and left. I meant that, and was hoping to re-open her later, but I never saw her again. I wonder now if she maybe took that as a polite rejection of her. Dang it JT!

In hindsight, I should have just held out my hand and said “come have a drink with me”, then led her over to one of the couches to deep dive, while continuing to escalate. I probably could have closed this girl if I had pushed myself and gone for the move.

I am sure if I keep taking action I will find myself in many similar situations, and now I have I good idea of what I should do to keep pushing things further.

For April:

My main goals for April are:

- Finish the newbie mission (which I am doing in order, and I have time blocked off tomorrow to get my 6 hi’s - or sleep on the street).
- Attempt to make every interaction last 5 minutes or longer (at least in night game)
- Get at least three phone numbers.

For anyone reading, thanks for sticking with me on my journey so far. I promise it will only get more interesting from here. I was thinking about it this morning, and the only real difference between now and ten years ago was back then I had a good group of guys who supported me in my “adventures”. But you all have been so cool and supportive, maybe things aren’t so different after all…

Cheers,
JT

 

[JT Sunshine]

Day 4: Hi

Welp, I did it! Why was this one so hard?? Thought I would be sleeping on the street for sure.

My hope was to go to one of the many high-traffic walking trails we have in the area, but it was cold, windy and rainy. Yuck. A true artist must improvise when the best laid plans turn to shit. Decided to try a grocery store, and if that failed, another mall, this time in a higher-end neighborhood.

Grocery store was dead. It was early on a weekday, so I suppose that’s to be expected, but I mean it was DEAD. I turned a corner and saw a very cute woman. We made eye contact and I smiled, she smiled back BIG, but she was wearing a front-facing-baby-backpack (think The Hangover) with a *literal* baby in it. That totally threw me, but at least she smiled

Next up was the mall. I wanted to get some sharp new clothes for the gym anyways, so why not kill two birds with one stone. A saw a kinda cute girl standing by herself, so I put on a smile and said “hi, how are you?” She replied with a “great, can I help you find anything?” womp womppp, she worked there, and I had no idea. Haha, oh well. Not my objective today but it was nice to see her smile.

Wandered around for a while and didn’t see any women under 50, until finally there was one walking opposite of me. I gave her a “hi” and she replied with a “hi” back but never broke stride. Didn’t seem to be a warm or cold reaction, but in hindsight I wasn’t smiling, and that probably didn’t help the reaction.

I had walked the *entire* mall at this point, and I had to work for a bit, so I headed out. Stopped at a gas station, and as I was walking in a woman was walking out. Chubby little Asian with a cute face. I said “hi”, this time with a smile, and she said “hi”. She seemed a little surprised someone had talked to her, but again, the reaction was positive.

After work the plan was to hit the gym, then wander a college campus, then if that failed hit up a trendy area near downtown where I thought women HAD to be out and about, even with the nasty weather. I am so sick of malls at this point.

I was not planning on talking to anyone at the gym, but I was curious to see if I noticed any differences with my fresh new outfit and improved body language. I will say, I definitely got looks from the three attractive girls in there, when normally I feel like a ghost (I am in no way out of shape but definitely not ripped - very average, which is why I am working on that too). To my delight, as I was leaving, an EXCEPTIONALLY beautiful girl walked in, and I smiled at her and said hi. She just smiled back at me (maybe because she had headphones in?), but it was a warm smile, and it was awesome. I will make a point of smiling and saying hi to her every time I see her there (because based on her looks, I am assuming she probably goes often… haha)

Okay, I’m at 4/6 by this point and I’ve already been out a ton. College campus was deserted. spring break and everyone is gone.

Last stop, trendy area. Damn I’ve never walked around this much. I saw a cool looking bar and decided to go in and scout it. Saw a VERY cute girl at the bar with what appeared to be some coworkers. I said hi, then told her she had the “cutest drink ever”. She smiled back at me and said “I know, right?” Then kept talking to her friends. On my way out I saw a girl waiting for the host. I said “hi, how are you?” She said “good thanks!” I just smiled and kept walking.

MISSION COMPLETED!

Realizations:
1. I probably could have kept either of the last two going, but baby steps. I’m still in my head about “day game”, and how it feels really hard to me. I think once it’s FINALLY warm out I should find many more opportunities to practice without feeling like I have to travel the globe.

2. This last area I was in was in may be a goldmine. I peeked into some of the restaurants and they were full of the “young professional” type, tons of well dressed blondes (my favorite). I can fit into that scene well. There are probably 20-30 nice high rise condos surrounded by trendy bars, restaurants etc. I may come scope the bars out there tomorrow night, and will definitely hit those streets this spring/summer.

3. I need to study and WORK on my day game skills. I shouldn’t feel weird about talking to cute strangers in broad daylight. It’s totally natural, and would be weirder if I don’t do it.

4. I feel myself looking for opportunities to interact with others, presenting my best self, and I am getting REALLY good at eye contact. I personally think my eyes are my best feature, too. Part of me feels like I’m not progressing as fast as I should be, but if I can get these fundamentals down, it will help me greatly in the long run. Progress is progress, and I should celebrate that!

Until next time,
JT

 

[JT Sunshine]

Tonight I got home very late after a brutally long workday. Didn’t have time to game or even go to the gym. Since I’m working a short day tomorrow, figured I’d scope out the Thursday night scene. Used to be pretty good around here, well, a long time ago…

Covid has taken a toll on this city! It was admittedly hard to even find a venue open past midnight. Yikes. I drove to four different neighborhoods that used to all be bustling until 2am - and it was pretty much a bust. Going to write down my findings to keep a log, as I remember back in the day I used to know a venue that was “good” every night of the week. And there MUST be a good Thursday night venue somewhere… but I didn’t discover it tonight.

Downtown east, every single bar was closed except one small sports bar. Looking through the windows I didn’t see a single female in there. NEXT! Downtown west I found two nightclubs open. From what I could see inside there were 15-20 people max, all standing around. Maybe one or two hot girls, both with guys. Not worth paying for the parking.

Went to the hipster neighborhood and every bar was closed but one - saw just two guys in it. Yay. Went to the college campus bar strip and even it was pretty damn quiet. Couple of mixed groups wandering around. Was after 1am at this point and I remembered it’s spring break, and everyone is probably partying on Daytona Beach. I know where I’ll be next year

It’s looking like my only Thursday night option based on this scouting mission will be college bars. I’m not quite their age, so that will take some finesse, but I’m not *that* old. Maybe I go there around 8pm and make friends with all the bouncers/bartenders, and then create a little social proof for myself? Will test this out.

But I can’t admit defeat… I can’t accept the fact that there is NOWHERE good on a Thursday. So what do I do?? An idea popped into my head…

What if while I’m out this weekend I make a point of asking groups of girls I see if 1. They ever go out on Thursday night and 2. Where the best place to go is?? Because I’m a fun guy and I want to party on a Thursday, dammit. And maybe if I play my cards right, I can find a lovely lady to take me out to their favorite Thursday night spot. Worst case they all tell me Thursday is shit and at least I have an easy opener. Because I genuinely want to know

I still feel like I’m running in circles a bit… but I have to remind myself I’ve talked to over 20 girls in the past couple of weeks (even if it was only a “hi”)! I’ve found three great weekend night game spots, a potential great neighborhood for day game, and I’ve weeded out a lot of places too. This is going to help me make the best use of my time. I am putting in the ground work, I’ve improved my wardrobe, my posture, my eye contact, and my speech.

A girl at work today even told me “you speak about stuff so clearly and with such confidence. You make everything seem so easy. How do you do it?” Practice, darling… I’m starting to feel like my old self again. I have to keep pushing, focus on what I can control, and the results will come.

Tomorrow is Day 5 of the newbie mission - “hi, how are you?” I’m going to blow this one out of the fucking water.

JT

 

[JT Sunshine]

What an amazing night I had tonight. From where I was yesterday to where I am right now, I am truly blown away.

I GOT A NUMBER

Field report coming soon…

I showed up downtown with an hour and forty minutes until bar close. My goal tonight was to talk to women. As I walked towards the strip of bars, I felt nothing but anxiety, introvertedness, wishing I had stayed in my warm bed. I felt uncomfortable, nervous, anxious… I even toyed in my head if I should just go home and try again tomorrow. No. Fuck that. This is something I want, I thought, and if it takes me weeks, months, a whole year, I am going to learn this and I am going to do this!

Went to saloon bar first. They stop letting people in earlier than the others in the area. It’s actually kind of quiet in there - but - the roof patio is OPEN! I went up there but I’m still in my head, I freeze. Fuck. At least I’m grooving to the music, starting to feel a bit loose, let’s call this the warm up bar.

Made my way to the Legacy club. Fairly busy. I post up in a spot that seems high traffic, and *I’m* opened by a super drunk dude. Let him talk at me for a while (he is clearly a gamer too, but WAY too drunk). Met his friends, and now I have a “home base” to go back to. He is still relentless telling me his life story, I break off and have an actual good conversation with his friend, then make my way towards the bar.

Side note, for context, I am trying to relearn this fairly sober. I’ve set a two-drink limit on myself. I order Red Bull and lots of waters when I’m out.

I conveniently position myself by two HOT blondes. I see one is being hit on by an older Asian dude, she is trying to shut him down, but the guy is RELENTLESS. I opened the one being hit on, and created some good banter. Basically had to open the other as she joined the conversation (found out they were twins), and ended up having a fun conversation with two of the hottest girls at the club. And they opened so EASY! The first one even gave me a sip of her drink. Sadly for me this is my first good interaction with a pair of hot girls since 2012, so I think they got bored eventually and said “nice to meet you”.

I go back out and talk to the sober friend of the drunk ass guy who opened me. Now I’m in a talkative state again. It’s getting late. Back in for another set.

The same spot at the bar has two even HOTTER girls. I post up by them, and see one has a fuzzy tiara on. I think, it must be her birthday. My anxious self kicks in and I’m freezing up. Fuck. I see her trying to sign the receipt for her drink, but the pen doesn’t work, and she’s trying to get the bartender’s attention (to get another pen).

As fate would have it, I see a pen in front of me on the bar. I tap on her shoulder and say “need this?” She gives me a thank you and signs the bill. I tap her shoulder again, point to her hat, and ask if it’s her birthday. IT IS! She just turned 23.

Long story short we talked for a while, and while I was showing her pictures on my phone of what I do for work, she grabbed it and put her number in. We talked for a while more after that. She was extremely attentive, very open body language, and lots of light kino on both our parts. I was leading the interaction, I got to know her a bit, but her friends dragged her away.

In hindsight I should have tried to make future plans, screened for logistics, or befriended her group. But I had a good 5-10 minutes of isolation, got her number without asking, and she was fucking gorgeous. I am going to text her tomorrow afternoon and if the vibe is even 50% as warm as it was tonight, I will see her again.

What I Learned
The girls I am attracted to that I haven’t had the balls to talk to opened for me EASY tonight, with a bit of finesse on my part (putting myself in proximity). It doesn’t matter that I am 10 years older than most of them. When I’m confident, they’re receptive. My style adjustments are working, my body language is great, and if I keep practicing this I can only get better… right??

 

[JT Sunshine]

Feeling a bit under the weather so haven’t been out again this weekend. Texted the birthday girl tonight and she responded very warm! I’m trying to match her energy/responsiveness while keeping it simple and fun. Don’t want to seem too interested, but with the amount of exclamation points she added after “hi” I don’t want her to think I’m *not* interested either

Just told her we should go get a drink this week, let’s see how it goes…

 

[JT Sunshine]

Date is set for Wednesday night! Kept the conversation light and flirty, handled the logistics, went as well as it could have.

Honestly not too worried about the date, this is what I’m good at, although it’s been years since I’ve been on one.

My plan:
Flirt more - deep dive - kino escalate throughout - figure out her favorite movie and tell her I’ve never seen it - go “watch” said movie. Sound good?

 

[JT Sunshine]

Date went well! She got off work late, we still met up for a couple hours and had a couple drinks.

OH FUCK DAMN AM I RUSTY. I need to get more numbers/dates and get back to how good I used to be.

I felt so awkward at first as this was literally a club number and I knew nothing about her other than the random banter we had at the club. Did my best to deep dive and learn more about her - she’s so young and still figuring out what she wants in life. Talked about travel, our friends’ relationships, I went through the story of what I dreamed of being as a little kid and how I got to that point today. Lots of light playful touching, tons of eye contact, I even opened a mixed set in front of her and got them talking and laughing with us. Moved her around the venue a lot. Also was approached by a dude I used to work with I haven’t seen in a decade, who was cool as fuck and added to that “this a super cool social high value guy” vibe. Feel as though we got to know each other very well, I presented myself as a very sexy dude that’s very touchy, and got her qualifying herself a lot.

Logistics weren’t great as she has to work in 5 hours and just came off a 12 hour work day. Part of me is still kicking myself as she seemed VERY interested (open body language, playing with her hair/necklace while looking into my eyes, receptive to all my touches) and I probably should have convinced her to call in sick and gone for the lay. However, I seeded our next date very well, and she *just* texted me telling me that she can’t wait for me to come over and see her artwork/watch her favorite movie with her.

I’ll take that as a win. I 100% have to fuck her tho, or will risk entering the friend zone. I have a bad habit of playing it safe and I need to knock that shit off. Set myself up for one perfect last opportunity. She’s stupid hot, and I owe it to myself to enjoy her how men and women are supposed to enjoy each other… fuck, she deserves it too.

Back to approaching this weekend, hopefully can get a couple more numbers and set up a couple dates next week, as well as a Netflix n chill date with tonight’s girl.

I feel I still have so much to learn - but last month if you told me I would have a HOT girl ten years younger than me wanting me to come over to her place to watch a movie… I wouldn’t have believed it. I’m proud of me, damn it. Onward and fucking upward!

Best of nights,
JT

 

[JT Sunshine]

Another long work day, but made it out! Keeping this short and sweet cause I need some sleep before tomorrow.

Got to the club less than an hour before close - hit the dance floor and did a couple non-verbal “openers” with girls dancing. Get eye contact, start vibing with them, light touching, etc. Was fun, got them to vibe out with me, some kino, nothing really hooked hard but it’s something I will experiment with. I think with practice I could get good as my eye contact and body language seems to be getting super solid. Maybe if I start talking loud and slow after dancing it will get them more interested. Then I can lead them off the dance floor and start a real conversation. Will field test. This is a club I used to scoot my way around like a lost puppy, now I am walking tall and people just move out of my way. Interesting how people subconsciously react to good body language. The results aren’t where I want them to be, but I’m feeling like I’m a “presence” as opposed to another random guy in the crowd.

One normal open too, well received, her friend was super drunk and trying to contact her ride and didn’t go anywhere either, but felt nice to talk to a pretty girl.

The best part of the night - snapped my old wing from 10 years ago and dude immediately responded with “where’s my invite??” Whelp, we are going out tomorrow night. I’ve been solo since I restarted my journey, haven’t seen this man in years, and it’s going to be incredibly fun to game with my good buddy from back in the day tomorrow night.

I wish I would have pushed harder to break my comfort zone and approach the super hot girls in groups I saw. There were many missed opportunities. But I did seize a couple and I’m getting more and more comfortable. Excited for what tomorrow brings

Go get em boys!
JT

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

Another long work day, but made it out! Keeping this short and sweet cause I need some sleep before tomorrow.

Got to the club less than an hour before close - hit the dance floor and did a couple non-verbal “openers” with girls dancing. Get eye contact, start vibing with them, light touching, etc. Was fun, got them to vibe out with me, some kino, nothing really hooked hard but it’s something I will experiment with. I think with practice I could get good as my eye contact and body language seems to be getting super solid. Maybe if I start talking loud and slow after dancing it will get them more interested. Then I can lead them off the dance floor and start a real conversation. Will field test. This is a club I used to scoot my way around like a lost puppy, now I am walking tall and people just move out of my way. Interesting how people subconsciously react to good body language. The results aren’t where I want them to be, but I’m feeling like I’m a “presence” as opposed to another random guy in the crowd.

One normal open too, well received, her friend was super drunk and trying to contact her ride and didn’t go anywhere either, but felt nice to talk to a pretty girl.

The best part of the night - snapped my old wing from 10 years ago and dude immediately responded with “where’s my invite??” Whelp, we are going out tomorrow night. I’ve been solo since I restarted my journey, haven’t seen this man in years, and it’s going to be incredibly fun to game with my good buddy from back in the day tomorrow night.

I wish I would have pushed harder to break my comfort zone and approach the super hot girls in groups I saw. There were many missed opportunities. But I did seize a couple and I’m getting more and more comfortable. Excited for what tomorrow brings

Go get em boys!
JT

 

[JT Sunshine]

Saturday night was quite interesting.

Met up with my buddy about three hours before club close, and headed downtown to the “Legacy Club”. It’s finally warm out and everywhere was packed out.

Got in a grabbed a drink, and we spent a solid hour just catching up. Great to have a friend and be in a talkative state, but also very distracting from the mission at hand - talking to beautiful women!

We went up to the newly-opened rooftop patio. I opened a group of two girls. Made some chit chat but I honestly wasn’t very interested in these girls so I ejected - kinda cute but it was early and not worth investing a night in.

Decided to pop over to the new dance club and check it out. SUPER busy. Made our way to the dance floor and posted up near the DJ booth. Never gone to this part of the dance floor before, but it seemed at the girls were staring up at the DJ/light/gogo dancer area, so I faced the crowed and just danced my ass off. I’m not a great dancer but I can move to a beat and draw some (hopefully positive) attention to myself with my loud ass shirt

Group of three cute girls moves right in front of us and start dancing. I was immediately drawn to the blonde who seemed to be the “leader” of the group. I locked eyes with her and started singing along to the song, made sure my eyes were smiling and she started singing along with me too. All of a sudden she gets opened by some dude screaming in her ear. Takes about 30 seconds for her to shut him down, and she turns back to me.

She points at my vape. I say “wanna hit?” There was something so seductive about how I held the vape in her mouth while she hit it. We talked about the flavor and jokes around a bit, although it was hard to hear anything. All of a sudden the other guy comes back shouting shit at her. I just grab her, pull her in to me and start grinding with her. We do this for the rest of the song but her friends want to leave. She says “find me later” and off they go. I never found her later

Threw some darts with my buddy, then decided to go back to Legacy. Up on the roof I see a group of 7 people seated, mostly girls, all extremely attractive. Groups, especially mixed groups have always been my weak spot. Figured tonight was as good as any to grow some balls and approach.

I overheard one girl talking about getting hit on by loads of creepy guys. Without skipping a beat I look over my shoulder and say to the whole group “you guys must have been at (club name) tonight, huh?” They all laugh and say yes, how did you know? I said “based off the long line of guys hitting on you with no clue how to speak to a woman, I had a pretty good idea”. They all laugh again. I ask what brings them out and they say for one girl’s birthday. She’s the prettiest one, so I focus my attention on her, while keeping the group engaged. I also introduced myself to the guy first before the girls.

The group is asking me questions about my tattoos, my shirt, if I was a swinger because it had pineapples on it I called my friend over and introduced him, talked about how we were best friends when we were younger but he has been traveling. Things were going pretty well. I focus my attention to the girl, but in asking how she knows everyone, it turns out one of the guys is her LONG TERM BOYFRIEND. Noooo! I kept talking for a while but the other girls had split off so me and my buddy decided we would too.

In hindsight had I asked this earlier I probably could have focused my energy on a different girl. Noted.

It was getting late so I decided to open the hottest, most dolled up girl I had seen all night. We talked for a couple minutes and she actually complimented my look, but didn’t seem too interested and went back to talking to her friends.

All in all had a blast, learned a lot, and am looking forward to more progress. Next weekend my goal is at least one phone number, and maybe a kiss!

 

[JT Sunshine]

Busy week, haven’t posted in a while.

Hung out with bday girl Tuesday. Posted about it in the beginners board, long story short I feel the window is closing but maybe I’m overthinking. Kicking myself for not taking risks and going for what I want. Story of my life. The funny thing is, when I have taken risks, often times I’m wildly successful. If I can just HANDLE that aspect of my life in regards to women, I’ll be living in paradise. But it’s still so damn hard for me… I’ll get past this.

Texted her this morning in an attempt to make plans. She replied very excited, we went back and forth figuring out logistics and now she hasn’t replied in hours. I’m sure she’ll probably reply tomorrow morning and all will be good, but right now I’m feeling like I fucked this one up and I’m mad at myself. I can’t even imagine how far I’d be if I just WENT FOR WHAT I WANTED. Ughhhhhh

Used this frustration to have possibly the best workout of my life tonight, and if I can carry it over to tomorrow (knowing myself I will), I am going out solo and will try, for the first time ever, direct approaching every hot woman I can find. I’ve been rocking it with the situational approach, but it’s time to blow my comfort zone out of the fucking water. I am not going home without a phone number.

Another issue of mine is always feeling like I need to be doing something productive. And when it comes to this area, having just *one* girl I’m talking to (or not, currently) is killing me. You can’t run a successful business off of one lead. I need more options. And while I’ve always tricked myself into thinking I’m being “productive” by reading articles about this stuff, that won’t do me any good.

I need to turn off my analytical brain, go out and DO STUFF, then have fun afterwards analyzing what worked/didn’t work. I know everything I need to know, I need to take ACTION, put in the reps and then come back to analyze and fine-tune my performance, then repeat, while slightly recalibrating.

On a fun note, I found a little hole in the wall dive with some SERIOUSLY beautiful wait staff that seems completely dead, always. Driven by it 30 times and didn’t know it was even open. I popped in on Monday to kill 20 mins on their patio, and had a very fun, flirty conversation with the bartender. She was magnificent - perky, natural breasts, and an ass that wanted to rip the seams out of her little jean shorts. She seemed genuinely sad when I left. I know bartenders flirt for tips, and I’m probably just being delusional, but I am always going to assume attraction until proven otherwise. And I am stingy with my money regardless, so who cares her coworkers were just as hot. Good job to whoever does the hiring.

I am going to make a point of journaling *there*. I’m sure they’re all bored out of their minds, maybe they’ll ask me what I’m always writing about and I can tell them about my adventures… who knows, maybe they’ll want to join me on one.

Tomorrow night I go hard, then work a long day Saturday, then go hard again, and Sunday we will see if I go on a date with bday girl or back to the dive bar full of hotties to recap my weekend. Should be a good time regardless. I’m really enjoying writing these journal entries - will be fun looking back on them in a year or two.

Peace,
JT

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

Hey, JT. Great job with these journal entries! It feels like we’re right there with you.

Especially when you talk about doing the reading and believing you’re being productive. That hits home.

And getting out there solo. That’s a big one for me too. I’ll be following along. Keep it up brother.