Strategy for getting ex back when we have a situationship

[Dragonetti]

First and foremost: I don't need her. I don't even experience yearning for her. I know enough that this consideration is important before anything else. So, yup: no neediness here.

This is a pretty cold and rational calculation: i am sick of crazy girls and my ex is not crazy, she understands me on an intuitive level that's rare, she would be a good mom/wife, and she is also on the same level of sexual intensity as me. I am seeing plenty of girls, but I'd like to give it another shot with this ex.

There's still passion between us (we have a low-level situationship where we hang out, cuddle, kiss, and have sex.) and she expresses affection for me. I don't long for something more in our meetups, but I think it would make my life better.

I know this stuff is tricky so... what's the optimal move? It seems like saying "why don't we get back together?" explicitly is the wrong move, because women are subtle and behavior-based creatures.

 

[Karea Ricardus D.]

Sounds like a good thing, yeah. I think if you just start spending more and more time with her it will over a couple of weeks become a foregone conclusion that you're back together.

 

[Dragonetti]

Sounds like a good thing, yeah. I think if you just start spending more and more time with her it will over a couple of weeks become a foregone conclusion that you're back together.

Right now I initiate half the time though. To spend more time with her would require more initiation which seems... weak?

 

[TomInHo]

I know this stuff is tricky so... what's the optimal move? It seems like saying "why don't we get back together?" explicitly is the wrong move, because women are subtle and behavior-based creatures.

It’s actually very simple to do.

Just keep fucking her, go on dates so the meetups aren’t only about sex, let her sleepover more and don’t talk about other girls

Also appear to be more stable and don’t share too much information about you going to bars, parties or anywhere single people go to mingle

Keep doing that long enough and she will begin to reach out more and eventually start asking you about what kind of relationship you have

That’s when you can propose a more exclusive thing if you want but until then keep fucking her, make memories and shut the fuck up about the relationship and what it means

But I also have a few questions for you

Do you really want to be in an LTR with someone you’re not even excited about?

Because I know you’ve been having trouble with retention lately and could you be going back to your ex for the comfort factor?

Do you really think you’ll be happy with her long term because she is your ex for a reason. So what would stop you from getting dissatisfied with her later?

Just food for thought