"Quit trying to rape drunk girls" accusation

[Hue]

Yo, been pretty damn busy lately so it took me a minute to reply to all these.


Sandman,

That's even more bonkers considering she explicitly texted you she enjoyed herself. I'd imagine the V card (even though you didn't fuck? you just broke her hymen I take it) had a lot to do with it because psychologically that can become a big deal for some girls - a cheap motel isn't the typical romantic fairy tale about losing it.

My suggestion. Don't escalate. Cut contact.

This was my initial reaction and I considered not responding whatsoever to the texts - though ultimately I felt the need to defend myself and not put up with ridiculous claims, domineering, and general crazy-bitch behavior. The more people let this happen the more it happens, but the method of response is just as important as there being a response at all.


Rob,

Ever more reason to relocate out of the US to less culturally hostile pastures...

1+


Gunwitch,

Sounds almost like some dude got ahold of her phone to me. I've had this shit happen before, text can be tricky.

Pictures of balls?
Strange 180s in vibe?
"Drunk GIRLS"? Women don't tend to refer to themselves as girls.
Horse cum?

Seems fishy. Like some man friend or brother or something.

And yeah don't be telling on yourself for something you didn't do to any police or campus people man, BAD IDEA. Guilty until proven innocent. These people deal with sex criminals or discipline cases (in case of school) all day every day, they assume everyones a scumbag. Running in saying you aren't is like running in yelling "don't think about pink elephants!!!!!" They just visualize you being date rapey immediate.

I thought about this too. She has a boyfriend and it would definitely be congruent with the whole thing. The alpha chick in her group (HB8-HB9) is also pretty nutty (I've seen her play quite a few guys and she knows her power over most men) so I considered it could have been her.

After I calmed down a bit I decided against reporting the accusation - it didn't seem right unless I'd already been accused. Excellent point about the visualization, that's the case with many things under the same dynamic. Luckily I live in a city with a massive university, so the social repercussions are minimized.

There was a talk by a lawyer on youtube saying as many as 85% of his clients in prison wouldn't be there if they hadn't spoken to the police.

Noted!

Alibi cams are peace of mind, even if you don't take illegal footage of sex acts through a hidden cam. Can still show her on top of you making out in living room before the supposed rape.

As a pure safety procaution, I may have to get one of these for my next apartment in a few months.


Smurf,

This shit is one of the more rough consequences of things like auto-rejection, backwards rationalization, or buyers remorse. You leave a girl alone too long and a negative influence comes in that she identifies with, she'll believe things went a certain way and there's no amount of facts you can spit that'll change her mind.

Facts. Those three things can be fucking lethal. It reminds me of how Hector put it in a video, "women aren't rational, they are practical" (though he makes the point that none of us are all that rational). It's practical for her emotions, her reputation, and her self-esteem to rewire her whole understanding of a situation/you to best fit her, it's convenient. Pretty fucked.

I never go for drunk looking girls/if we're on first date and haven't had sex they can have 1 drink max. I've seen girls go from fine to trashed within minutes with miniscule levels of alcohol and its not worth it to risk it.

-always get her to participate in the escalation. Make her put in some effort that clearly says, "yes I want to fuck". especially in today's setting where all these celebrities are getting charges put on them and the accusations are thrown around so easily, now's a better time than ever to have the girl chasing you.

Sober sex > drunk sex anyways, bro. Though drunk, "american", wet, sloppy hookups can be very fun, that doesn't make it worth it. Like 70% of my gaming happens at bars, but I've turned down multiple girls because they were too fucked up.

A few months ago a girl was coming on to me literally going, "Hueee kiss meee. Come on don't be a pussyyy", but me and everyone else agreed she needed to get the fuck home. She's hot, but in the moment of it I was so turned off by her drooling drunked state I didn't want to - both logically and physically.

For less obvious situations, my rule of thumb is usually to get her to my house, and make a judgement call once we're actually in bed together / chances are high of fucking. If I think she's too drunk, I'll tell her I'm too drunk and we can fuck in the morning - then fuck her brains out the next morning. If I think she's fine, I'll start hooking up with her and during the more intense parts (say, we're both naked and she's rubbing her pussy on my dick) I'll tell her to say dirty shit multiple times, "stuff me with your cock", "I want you to fuck me", "I need you to fuck me", etc.. This is a good method, but then again, look what happened to Regal.

I'm putting it down to screening harder and making sure she enjoys herself

Same. Like that "LR: I like floor" report I had in my journal last semester - the girl was on medication that made her tired. That's a huge red flag because it literally is an impaired state she's in. I screened the living fuck out of her to the point it probably was weird for her / I came across as indecisive, but during sketchy scenarios where it's more ambiguous, it's fully needed.


Regal,

That's great that you take precautions whenever possible! But the truly terrifying thing is, is that it is on you if she regrets it. It's now your fault, as the man, if she regrets it. And in today's society, regret = rape. Doesn't matter if she regrets it the next day, the next week, or as we're seeing now, the next few decades later!

I so hope that the culture becomes more empathetic towards this side of shit. I'm trying to collect my thoughts on a big write up I'll put in Off-Topic about toxic masculinity VS toxic femininity and what I perceive as going on with shit.