pattern of women losing interest during dates

MasterOfGame

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Feb 13, 2024
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5
Hey ya'll

I'm hoping someone can offer some advice or insight into an annoying pattern I've seen on dates lately. I've been on a few dates with different women in the past few months: things start out great, but as the date goes on, theres a drop in their interest and enthusiasm.

At first, everything seems normal. We meet up, have a drink or dinner, and the conversation will be good. There's laughter, sharing stories, and I'll think to myself that its going great. Then, as the night wears on, I'll start to notice that the woman's body language changes. She'll start glancing at her phone, responding to my questions with shorter answers, and generally seem less engaged.

It's not just one or two instances - this has happened on multiple dates with different women. I've tried to brush it off as nerves or a bad day, but it's starting to get to me. I feel like I'm doing everything right: I'm respectful, attentive, and genuinely interested in getting to know them. But somehow, I'm just not holding their attention.

I've asked myself if it's something I'm doing (or not doing), but I'm stumped. I'm not pushy or aggressive, and I make sure to listen actively and show interest in their lives. I've even tried mixing up the date activities to keep things fresh and exciting.

Has anyone else experienced this? Am I just not "it" for these women, or is there something I can do to keep the spark alive on dates?

Thanks in advance for any advice or insights!
 

Will_V

Chieftan
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Jan 24, 2021
Messages
1,615
@MasterOfGame could be a number of things, but based on these comments:

I feel like I'm doing everything right: I'm respectful, attentive, and genuinely interested in getting to know them. But somehow, I'm just not holding their attention.
...
I'm not pushy or aggressive, and I make sure to listen actively and show interest in their lives. I've even tried mixing up the date activities to keep things fresh and exciting.

sounds to me like you aren't introducing enough teasing, sexual tension, and likely touch as well.

Think about the last time you went to a social occasion, like a dinner party, one that had nothing to do with seduction. You met a bunch of people, and at first it feels great, there's a social buzz, you're having fun, catching up or meeting someone new and interesting.

But after a while you've sort of had enough. You've had your fill of socializing. You start to think about stuff you have to get done, preparing for the next day, maybe you're tired and need to sleep, etc. So you start checking your phone, emails, and start going around saying your goodbyes.

That's fine and normal for typical social interactions. But staying at that level is a death sentence for seduction, because it's not really a seduction, it's just socializing. And everyone gets bored of a social interaction eventually.

That's why as soon as possible you have to give her a clear sense that it's not a typical social interaction, by creating sexual tension in the way you interact - holding eye contact, lingering touch, talking about sexual topics, creating a bubble of intimacy etc. This changes everything for her, because now it's exciting and ambiguous, with the possibility of all sorts of naughty things happening at any time in the future.

A seduction is not just a normal get-to-know-you interaction followed by an agreement to fuck. It is a ramping up of connection, sexual tension, and touch over time until she is horny and wanting to fuck. That means that obviously if you never ramp things up, it will never get to that level and it will always feel like a meet and greet session that ends when someone gets bored or realizes they have other things to do.

Hope this helps!
 
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