Girlschase / seduction-community glossary

[Dragonetti]

Is there a glossary somewhere? I am pretty good with terminology, but stuff like "auto-rejection" and "qualify" (just using examples) aren't always clear.

 

[StrayDog]

Is there a glossary somewhere? I am pretty good with terminology, but stuff like "auto-rejection" and "qualify" (just using examples) aren't always clear.

not sure about a glossary but to clear up the two terms you mentioned here

Auto rejection is a phenomenon that occurs when someone desires something but determines the object of their desire to be unattainable. It is a protective psychological mechanism. It isn't always necessarily true that it is unattainable (though it sometimes is), just that the individual perceives it as such. To the point of then rejecting the object of their desire, as a preemptive means of avoiding having to face a harsher rejection should they continue to pursue it. This can happen either at a conscious level, or an unconscious one and is often accompanied by backwards rationalizations such as "she wasn't that interesting any way" (actually really dug her), or "what a jerk" (really only disappointed) or "If he's gonna be so stubborn then I'm going to show him what he is missing out on" (proceeds to walk away with mixed feelings of relief and disappointment). When auto rejection is more self aware someone might be having thoughts like "he is not interested in me any way, I am just going to just walk away and save my self the trouble" (all the while the guy was interested in her but failed to show her he was actually attainable, so she walked). There can be many layers and nuances to how auto rejection manifests in an interaction, but this is the basic idea. Both men and women do it.

Qualify is pretty straight forward. Basically it is when a man or a woman explicitly or implicitly states that someone is or isn't (disqualify) suited to a particular role or activity. Men and women qualify/disqualify each other for certain roles/activities (boyfriend,friend,lover, going on dates, having sex) using both straight forward language, or more subtle nuanced conversational subtexts. PUAs use qualifying/disqualifying strategically and in many scenarios so the applications vary and the subject is somewhat dynamic.

You will often hear PUAs advise to get women to qualify themselves to you as worthy partners/lovers and not the other way around because it puts the PUA in advantageous position that allows them to take the lead on the interaction. This is often coupled with other PUA tech, like sexual prizing. The PUA establishes a frame where they are the sexual prize, then they lead the girl to solidify that frame by getting her to qualify herself as worthy of his sexual prowess. The PUA may then solidify the frame further by agreeing with her qualification, thus qualifying her.

So qualification at its most basic, as a technique, is either getting her to suggest she is qualified to hang with you, or you suggesting (or outright saying) that she is qualified. Either she qualifies herself, or you qualify her.

Understand that qualification can happen on a very subtle level. Like you saying you like creative people and her going out of her way to exemplify the many creative aspects of her personality. While she is not explicitly qualifying herself to you, she is basically implying that she wants to be someone who is qualified to receive your attention (at least in this regard, then once more sexual frames are set, you can lead her tendency to qualify in less sexual frames, towards her qualifying in more sexual frames).

Qualifying a girl is often a solid way to avoid auto rejection when you sense that she views you as slightly unattainable. You can do this in many ways, but you are basically giving her reason to believe you actually enjoy her company. You qualify her "you seem like a spontaneous person, I like that about you"

Also, a PUA will often be subtly disqualifying himself from roles counter to those of being a Lover. Like the boyfriend role. This can be done in many ways both subtle and not so subtle. While at the same time qualifying himself for a Lover role. The crucial thing being, of course, that he is not doing this explicitly by just saying things like "I am a great lover", but instead subtly implies as much. This is crucial because he needs to maintain himself as the sexual prize, as it is a more advantageous frame to lead with. He is therefore qualifying AS a Lover, but not qualifying himself TO her. Instead, she is the one qualifying herself to him (as someone to share his loverly abilities with). He in turn confirms her qualification as a means of affirming her investment in the proper seductive framework.

Since qualification can apply to many relationship roles, a seducer can also use these techniques to lead a girl into a relationship. Basically leading her to qualify her self for a girlfriend or wife role. And then in turn qualifying her himself, to solidfy that frame.

You can also qualify the connection you two share together at any stage of a seduction "seems like we're both adventurous in similar ways". This is essential you qualifying her, but you are doing it in a "we frame" to solidify a sense of connection. "We are compatible, therefore you are qualified"

Also you can use dissqualifying statements in strategic ways as well, as means for getting her to deny the disqualification and there fore qualifying herself (or vying to be qualified), or just to build tension and intrigued. Get her wondering how qualified she really is/how attainable you really are.


Hope this clears some things up. Feel free to ask about other terms, I am happy to share my perspective.

 

[StrayDog]

Also, I think part of the reason PUA terms aren't always immediately clear is because they are describing living breathing social phenomena that are dynamic, and often have a number of layers to how they manifest at a given moment. It is tricky to describe a definition without outlining a number of ways they can play out to varying degrees of subtlety. Because of the subtextual nature of social interactions, phenomena as such is not always clearly discernable in a cut and dry manner. Though the phenomena at the heart of it all is there, it can appear somewhat obscured by social nuance. That's why it sometimes takes an entire article to define exactly what a term is and how it functions in the seductive arts

 

[Warped Mindless]

Whatever term you are confused on just open up google and type “girlschase.com TERM” and h it search. For example, try “girlschase.com qualification” and you will find articles written about it.

 

[Dragonetti]

Whatever term you are confused on just open up google and type “girlschase.com TERM” and h it search. For example, try “girlschase.com qualification” and you will find articles written about it.

I'd like to see a full list of terms though.