The social project

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
Night game, first time.

I checked the reviews, and a night club has a lot of positive reviews. Girls like social proof. A review said, “I feel like a queen”
If I was a hot girl, I’d go to this club.

It was a correct choice. The club had a lot of hot girls. I forgot to check their website, so I showed up there at 11, and the cover charge was $160.

I came home. That was Friday night.

On Saturday, I showed up at 8 to beat the cover charge. Successful.
The bouncer was friendly. Because it was early and I was the only one in line. He said, “You came here by yourself?” I said: “Yeah, I’m cool,” and he laughed.
I remembered Alek’s quote:
A true pro always come early.

Should I buy a drink? According to Alek, yes, so I bought one Pitbull. I approached a few girls, they were fairly warm.

The most difficult thing? Stay until 2 am, if I was NOT drunk, that is. And the club was quite a challenge for the positivity.

At 12 I kissed a girl on the dance floor ... on the cheek.

I tried the smoking area trick, but it was a sausage fest in there. Apparently that trick was overused.

At 1:50, another kiss.
Not too shabby for a beginner.
 

Teevster

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Aug 23, 2013
Messages
1,714
Location
Scandinavia - For Now
Did you really pay 160 USD to get into a club? That's a shitlot of money!

Usually the bigger venues tend to request a higher cover charge. Same with clubs that have tons of famous DJ's.

Remember this: Famous DJ's can be a lot of fun if you actually LIKE or CARE about the DJ. If you just want to meet hot girls, it doesn't matter, so dodge those clubs with famous DJ's if you want to save money as they are not always the best places to meet girls.

What you want is a DJ who can make the crowd move - an unknown DJ who knows what he is doing. My experience tells me that DJ's who are young kids are the worst, whereas older guys (can even be up to his 50's) are deadly. They just know their shit and like EVERY job, experience matters. A good DJ can affect the whole mood in a venue.

Also small venues can be good too. Small venues are usually easier to deal with. Maybe something worth checking out.

Good job coming early. The bouncer probably liked you. My advice is that oyu should keep going back and always behave... and always be cool to the bouncers. Once you get a bouncer on your side, you are fucking in. They are the key people. But be careful and not force conversation. They have a stressful job so don't force conversations as that will piss them off. Have a casual quick chat here and there and just be normal and nice. Do that 3 times and you suddently becomes one of the "regulars". This guarrantee you access and you may skip cover charges or even get a VIP card.

Remember that good clubs requires more to get into. Some high end venues requires you to pay a lot to get into. In my book, those are NOT the best. The best ones are those that are not necessarily expensive per.se. but picky in the door. Yes you may get picked out occasionally. Do not take this personally. It happens. But these clubs usually have the coolest and hottest girls.

To get in, you HAVE TO dress crazy cool, come in with a laid back attitude. Also ignore the bouncers until they talk to you. Lean into a wall, talk to some chicks, but do not engage the promoter or the bouncer until they engage you. If they ask you if you are on the guestlist, always say YES. They will look you up and find out you are not there. Once they point it out, act all shocked. You will most likely get in eventually (you may still have to pay). In fact, if the picker/promoter/bouncer tells you that you are not on the list say something like that: "really, that's weird. Well it is what it is I won't argue. Let us make it simple for all of us, and I will pay this time, no problem man - I just really a drink right now!"

There you go :)
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
Alek, thank you for your advice.

I didn’t paid $160, instead I dodged that night. For the first 50 people it would be $20, so I simply showed up early the next day.

I used Friday night to explored different venues to find small venues and picky venues. I didn’t care too much about the DJ, mostly for the hot girls. I’ll reserve the guest list tech for the next high end club I found

On Saturday night I went back there. Still be cool with the bouncer. I planned to build nightlife equity to I treated the staff well.

Last week, I did make the mistake of forcing conversations to the staff inside the club, not this time. This week I had a headache, so I didn’t go to the dance floor, instead I tried the posting strategy. Basically leaning in various places, laid back attitude, and having a good time.

To my pleasant surprise, there were girls coming near the places I stood. This strategy was as good as going around approaching. I tried posting at different places, and opening girls when they come there.

At 11, I hooked with a pair of girls, but so I ejected and planned to engage them later. This was the critical mistake, because as I observed later they went to the dance floor, getting disappointed, stayed until 2. This pair was looking for a man. At that time I was in a group, and the group was all facing away from me, approaching that pair was no longer possible.

At 1 there was a girl coming near my post. She was compliant right from the get go. I didn’t kiss and didn’t dance, relying solely on verbal game and touching game.
After knowing where we lived, I proposed we go to my place. She said yes. I didn’t pull her out. Chatting a little bit, later I ejected and when I come back, she already auto-rejected.

Should have persist 20 times :)
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
There is one more thing I should do.

Martial art.

This was pretty proven. This noon when I had lunch with the guys, it turned out one of the guy had a friend with benefits AND a girlfriend. I asked myself, "what did this guy do that I didn't?"
- This guy is taller than me one inch. That is an advantage, but nothing too much
- This guy has the same job as me
- This guy has the same race as me
- This guy has slightly more muscle than me
- I was slightly more social adroit than him
- I dressed somewhat better than him
- This guy do martial art. I didn't.

Martial art is the answer.
I planned this 2 months ago, but procrastinating. So from this week, 5 hours a week on martial art.
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
I just started boxing, and from the first class it was clear that my body wasn't in condition for boxing. So I'm doing boxing condition exercise every morning.

Day game:
I learned from the club, there are 2 strategy: moving or posting.
Moving I can discover girls, but I can do that once, at most twice, before that turned into “circling” and the negative social proof follows.
Thus I think moving is only viable on the street. Any indoor venue, I have to post.

Today I tried various posting place in the airport. The best place was the smoking area. Just going to the smoking area, sitting down the bench, and waiting for a girl to sit down next to me.
She was ok looking. I chatted with her for a while.
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
Respect the game:

This was on middle of a date.
She was riding the motorbike. I was behind.

I did not make any move. Despite I was touching her heavily before we got on the bike.

Because that’s unfair. She cannot resist because there will be an accident.

I play fair. I escalated when we were walking on the street. She can resist. Both of us can play the game fair and square.

We got off the bike. Fast forward, I kissed her on the cheek.
Then we walked under a green tree.
And I kissed her.
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
I thought to myself, how can I improve my lay count? Probably I should specialize in venues. So I decide to specialize in those:
- Bookstore: Meeting intellectual girls, and I can work in the bookstore at the same time.
- Beaches: Meeting girls in bikini.
- Tourist attractions: Girls are travelling, ideal for a discreet hookup.
For social circle:
- Tennis: I signed up for a tennis class in the local college. To get fit and meet college girls at the same time.

My insight this week:
- Bookstore: It's a small venue. Mostly I went indirect. I chatted with the staff and bought coffee to build a relationship. It would work like a social circle. Got 1 number.
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
At the bookstore, when I was working, I saw a mother/daughter pair. I approached them, and it went well. The mother helped me with the conversation. I got the number and the girl texted back.

Today was the first day at the tennis class. The class got cancel, but there were 2 girls there. I chatted with them. Since my aim was to break the comfort zone, I erred on the side of overstaying my welcome rather than ejecting. Got a number.

Maybe pairs are easier than lone girls. Because with pairs, the girl can see me chilling with her friend. Initially she will think, "my friend like this guy so this guy is okay."
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
Dance in the elevator:
When I went to the gym. a girl came up behind me and said something. I chatted with her.
At some point:
Me: Any plan tonight?
Her: I want to dance
Me: Let's dance
Her: Which nightclub are you going to?
Me: Not tonight
We walked in the elevator. I said: Let's dance now.

She put her bag down and we danced in the elevator.
Had I done it again, I'd amplify sexual tension and go for a teasing kiss.

The elevator opened. A guy was looking at us. We came out, I invited her to a bite after workout but she didn't bite.
We parted way.
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
Recently I have some minor breakthroughs:
- Consistent sign of interests: In January, when I walked through a mall, and I saw zero sign, I knew it must be fashion. So February I made an overhaul in my clothes. From March every time I went out there were signs.
- Consistent hook: At least in the last 3 days. On Friday when I was out for lunch, I saw a dude with light blue sunglasses, and a girl looked long and hard at him. So I got a sunglasses, and I got at least a girl hooked in the conversation in every outing.
- I was more cool in my life's primary social circles. The breakthrough is in mindset. Chase has an article about "why pickup artists are uncool." My realization is that it's possible to be uncool and getting girls, or be cool and not getting girls, or both. Thus coolness and getting girls are somewhat separated, and I must work on both separately.

Work-in-progress:
- I started singing at the beginning of March. The first time I heard my own voice, I winced. I practiced pronunciation and singing every day. I expected by April or May my voice would be good enough, and radio voice in 1 year.
- Regular night game: On Fridays and Saturdays
- Discovering new venues: I resolved to discover 30 new venues this month.
- Discovering new social circles: I mostly went to others' circles. I plan to host my own.
- Female friend: I chatted with my neighbor a few times. It turned out, one day I cooked, went out and forgot the key. I went to my neighbor and she helped me get in. I concluded that girls make good friends.

Ideas:
- Boxing: I went 3 times and I was out of shape. I planned to resume if I have time
- Losing weight: I wore XS size jeans, but recently some days I had a hard time fit into it. Thus this is sign that I should lose weight.
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
Recently I thought, how can I add “social value” to social circles.

That value comes from cold approach. Now, they don’t know that I pick up girls. Because they don’t do it, thus pickup is unrelatable to them.

If I strip out the pickup though, it turns out I have a lot of cool stories to share. For example:
- Vegas story: I found a guy on Craigslist who want to get to Vegas but he didn’t have a car. So I drove and he paid for gas.
The people in my circle thought I had some balls to go with some strangers on Craigslist. To this day that story still circulates in my circle.
- Drunk people in public: A drunk couple went on me on daytime, and I befriended them.

At least in this stage, the value of social circle was that it made me cooler. I think girls treat me well because they sense that I’m cool and legitimately have something to offer.
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
March summary
- Go out everyday (not missing a single day). Average 2 approaches each day. Results: 1 instant date, 1 kiss
- Voice training everyday (I missed 2-3 days). What’s amazing was that, by the end of the month, my voice completely transformed.

I read a quote on the Internet:
“Little hinges swing big doors”
Meaning a small action each day can have a good impact.

For example I went out everyday. I told myself “just go out, 5 minutes is ok, you don’t even need to approach if you don’t want to”.

And a mere 10 minutes each day on voice training made my voice much deeper in just a month.

Idea for April:
- Each night before sleeping, do push-ups. A mere 5 minutes training each day can improve my physical by the considerable amount.
 

readjusting

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
619
Being smooth:
I just read back the “being smooth” article, and I realized:
If I’m not smooth in my home and my work, there is no way I’m going to be smooth outside.

Thus this is what I’m working on.
 
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