Seppuku's Journey into Seduction

Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Jul 24, 2015
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Yeah the Vaz is really nice when you are in a monogamous relationship. If you are bedding randoms, you gotta glove up.
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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July 15th - Back from summer break and rusty

This year, the month of Ramadan started late May. Although it is a month of festivity for Muslim people, it is in fact quite the opposite for anyone not following the fast. Bars and lounges are closed, restaurants do not serve alcohol, shops are closed in the afternoon and opened all evening long instead (meaning that the malls are overcrowded at night). Very difficult to take a new girl to a date. Adding to this, I took my summer break just right after the Ramadan ended, and went to France. In the very short time I'm there, it is more about meeting family and friends. Also, my home in France is located in a rural area about 1h15 drive from the nearest large city. All in all, no dating too during this time.

So... here I am now, back at home on July 4th in this middle eastern country, after a forced 6 weeks break from seduction. The last time I had sex was on June 13th and I'm pretty horny. Who can I get home in the next few days?

First week, looking to get sex from one of my girls here
Miss Y, my Chinese girlfriend, was supposed to "surprise" me on the occasion of my birthday by showing up here (she lives and work in China)... But on the day of my arrival she texts that she won't be able to make it.

Because I expected her to be here, I hadn't informed Mary, my regular here, that I was back. When I try to reach out to her, she tells me she didn't know and had other plans already. So I try to reach out to Rachel. We agree we should catch up... However she has crazy working schedule, and would only be able to make it late at night (like 1am or so). This conflicts with my own working schedule (office at 8:30). So no deal. Next, I try my fatty FB from early January. This one was a fatty surprise from Badoo, but I still took her home a few times as sex was good with her (she liked the wild doggy style). Been a long time we didn't meet. Appointment agreed on Thursday... And at the last minute she cancels, she got some overtime at work and will have to work the whole evening too. Last, I try to get miss F. We agree on her coming Saturday afternoon... But last minute she cancels - has been partying late the night before, got drunk, and is having a hangover. LOL. I finally get to fuck Mary my regular on July 11th. Feels good after 4 weeks.

Which makes me think, I need a second regular here, with availability around Friday or Saturday: Mary is only available on Tuesdays, and Rachel lives far and has crazy working hours. Miss F. would be available on Saturdays, she is giving some awesome blowjobs and like it doggy style... However in the last few months she has grown a little bit too fat. This country has one of the highest obesity rate in the world, for a reason.

I am, however, quite rusty at the moment (my last new girll in bed on May 8th). Got to rebuild momentum again.

My cute regular Mary
Incredible, I've been seeing her since August 22nd, almost a year. At that time I viewed her as "the perfect FB", and had two other girls on the side (Gianna and my chinese Lily) that I ranked higher than her... However these two are gone, and Mary stayed around the whole time, against all expectations. I have since then upgraded her to GF status. GF in Seppuku's world, means "main girl", since I'm not adopting monogamy anytime soon.

Mary is Kenyan, 28 years old. She's quite tall (maybe 5'7?), dresses OK with a taste for very tight trousers showing off her round ass. She has had some crazy hairstyles all this time. Her face is cute at best. She would be between 7 and 8 for external appearance. However when you drop the clothes, she has two apple shaped round boobs, a very thin waist emphasizing large hips and round ass. Combine this with her long legs. The sight clearly makes me horny as fuck. Also, I don't know what it is, but when I get inside her there is something that makes me come quite quickly, in spite of the condom. I'm normally able to hold myself to last 30 to 60 minutes, but not with her. Relationship-wise, she is very cool and even temper, and never had even a shade of drama. Because of this, I rate the whole experience with her an 8.5.

Other objectives
Weight and exercise. Resumed the working out to three times a week (about 3 hours a week) - it was hard after a two weeks break, but I'm getting back to where I was. The break in France got me an extra kilo of fat, but after one week of getting back in my diet it seems I have lost half of that already. For the record as of Friday I do 65 pounds of barbell chest press, three sets of ten - the last set to failure. On lats pulldown I do 110 pounds, 3x10 - just before I left I had been able to increase this to 120 pounds. My one time maximum is obviously higher. On biceps curls I have increased to weights to 30 pounds each hand. Another great exercise I discovered and love is the "clean and press". It is actually making the whole body work. It leaves me exhausted after ten reps. Let us see how this improves over time.

Dressing. Back in France I bought myself a pair of Mexican boots, along with more new clothes. My casual style now is typically a blue jeans, Mexican boots (adding one inch to my size), Lacoste tight polo, leather belt and Ray Bans.

Personal business. I have finally contacted a tax advisor and we are going to look at how to optimize my personal project. It will hopefully give me the information I was lacking to properly decide on which business structure to use.

Geopolitical situation in this country. It seems now that the US is now helping in the mediation with our neighbors (although initially, thanks to Trump's tweets, it was unclear where the US stood). This is now giving hopes of an orderly resolution of the standoff with our neighbors. Wait and see.
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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August 29th - Second Introduction to myself

Well I've been away from my journal for some time. I should write separately about what happened since my last post, but for today I thought I would write a second introduction to myself, as many things changed since I started this journal three years ago.

Who I am
I am a french national with a career, working as an expatriate outside my own country since 2006, and currently working in a leading company in a small country of Middle East. As of today I just turned 48 years old, of the well preserved kind, people usually give me 5 to 10 years younger. It's essentially my grey hair that gives away my age. It's also my grey hair that got me compared to George Clooney several times, and hence my picture profile here.

Pre-seduction years
I got my first kiss at university, aged 19, and then my first girlfriend two years later at age 21. Back in those days, I always tried to get into a relationship with a girl. If by chance I would get a girlfriend, I would then try to stay with her several months. I suppose it was securing a safe access to sex, but also a desire to build a life. At age 28, I met my 6th girlfriend ever, who would later become my wife and mother of my kids... and the last woman I had sex with, until 17 years later.

During my married years, I never had sex with another woman. There were some temptations. A girl at my workplace, back in 2005, who looked like very much into me. And a few girls of my salsa class (including my salsa teacher) in 2009 - 2010, with whom I had an occasional date. But I never crossed the line... Because I was afraid of the consequences on my couple (and family life, including access to my kids) if I did. In the meantime, and from very early on in our marriage, a very uncomfortable situation had been building up with my wife. Finally, she was the one crossing the line first in summer 2011, when it was least expected - I thought that we finally had managed to accept and live with our differences, but I was proven wrong.

2012: The divorce
There was a very difficult decision to make late 2011. But it was clear the trust was broken for good, and the logical conclusion became soon very apparent. I started contacting lawyers in Jan 2012, and in Oct 2012 it was legally settled. In our wisdom, we managed to settle in friendly terms and keep a reasonably good communication, for the benefits of our two children.

2012-2014: Finding Girls Chase, and my first two years on my own
So in summer 2012, I found myself alone and free again after 15 years. How the hell did I get girls before I got married? In the late 2000s, I had stumbled by chance on a book about body language. It was very interesting, with a lot of emphasis on the subtle body language cues that a woman is giving when she spots a man she likes. I suppose that's what got me into looking for more in summer 2012. And that's when I discovered Girls Chase. When I started to dive into Chase's articles, all my history of past girls, the ones I had, but also all those I didn't have, suddenly all made sense!

I could see why I didn't get these girls when I chased them over and over. I could see why I never scored anything with these girls that I observed for months without taking action. Or those with whom I went needy and whiny. But also, I could see the few times when I acted closest to the Lover paradigm, and got the girl, and got her to chase me for years. I also could see the girls I lost because of the closed window opportunity.

I absorbed all of GC's content in a few months. Yet, my first attempts at applying the material (in 2013) was not so successful: a good start, some sexual tension, lots of interest, then fucking it up eventually one way or another. Also, I was still digesting my divorce, and had some big questions to resolve. Such as: Am I going to fall for a girl 15 years younger, and wake up to another divorce in my mid 60s? That thought actually scared me and paralyzed me for some time. Ultimately I resolved it: I just can't live a solitary, monk life just by fear of living, and let myself become bitter and dry heart. I was over it in June 2014, and decided to *really* take action.

June 2014: Finally moving on
I had already lost 15 kgs of overweight in 2011. My first action was to cut my addiction to porn - I held myself without porn or masturbation for three months. I had reached a state where I was staring at each girl moving a little ass in front of me, and realized it's not good either... So ultimately I had to release it. But after that, I was cured of the need for online porn. I suppose that helped my masculine frame a lot, because I finally got laid about a month later - my first "new" woman in 17 years. My Gosh!

Back then, I had reached to an agreement with ex-wife, to have my children under my custody for one year. It was nice to be a dad again, but at the same time it was also when I had resolved to get out of celibacy. And I was living in a conservative Middle Eastern society that frowns upon extra marital sex. How in the hell would I solve the problem?

That's very much where I was when I started this journal. As written in my first posts here, I initially tried to learn the cold approach way. Then in September 2014, my company gave me a brand new Blackberry. I already knew Whatsapp and BBM, but wanted to try a different chat app, so I installed WeChat. One day, I tried this "people nearby" feature... And surprise, there were a lot of girls with an online profile there. Started sending messages... And quickly got myself three dates within a week. That's how I got into online dating. I later added Badoo and Tinder to the set.

October 2014 - June 2015: The first girlfriends
In October 2014, I got myself my first girlfriend. Since my kids were living with me, it would help a lot if I normalized my relationship with her and have her accepted at home by my kids. Unfortunately, she left me in December 2014 when I was away for winter vacation. Never knew for sure why, since she refused to see me face to face and broke by text. No worries. I got myself a few dates, got a few lays (my first LRs here) and landed a new girlfriend. Same, she was introduced to my kids and participated to our family life. In June 2015 though, she had to return to her home country (the Philippines). In July, I went for a tour in the Philippines with her (my first time there), and then returned in my Gulf country, alone again.

August 2015 onwards: Explosive results
Mid august 2015, I had a monumental fuck up that made me realize a lot of things... All my missing mindset. This fuck up is written in here this journal, but I would need to make a full, detailed write up of the case for the broader good. The net effect of this eye opening FU, was that I finally forced myself to apply the same day lay model. My first time. And it worked wonders. From late August 2015 to November 2015, I went on my first rampage and laid one new girl per week. Almost miraculous. Including a few things I thought unthinkable (first meet ever at my home. Or meet her at the airport for the first time, then move straight to hotel. Etc...).

January 2016, I thought I would be leaving the country in a few months, so I decided to "settle" with my then girlfriend while getting busy with preparing my departure. And in March the unexpected happened, my company decided to promote me into a new role (a move I have been expecting for years) so suddenly I wouldn't be leaving the country anymore... and back into seduction. I got my second rampage then. Between April and June, I again got an average of one new girl per week... Including the most crazy week I ever had in the Philippines: Fucking 4 different girls multiple times each within 8 days. I had to rest on the seventh day (like in the Bible) because my dick was feeling a little flat, LOL.

Back in my country after the 2016 summer vacations, I decided I wanted to try more African girls (I had had a few extremely sexy moments with them at this point in time), and got into my "African moment". My game, until then, had been very tailored to Asian and Philippines girls. I found it challenging to get African... Until, I think, I tailored my game to them and eventually got it easier. Interestingly, I now find it harder to get Philippines girls now. What I believe the problem is, I had to lower my attainability to adapt to African girls. And now not attainable enough for Philippines girls. It should be easy to fix.

In the meantime, I've had more fantastic experiences. An awesome beauty in the Philippines in September 2016. A very challenging Kenyan girl in November 2016. A beautiful Chinese girl in March 2017. An awesome time in Nairobi in April (4 nights, two beautiful LRs, one FR+). A crazy Tinder moment in May where the girl met me the first time ever straight to my place and we fucked big time less than hour later).

There would be more to write... In particular my experience with multiple relationships. This post is already long enough so I will leave this for another post.
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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September 16: About myself, part two

Where my pseudo is coming from
Seppuku in Japanese means the traditional ritual suicide - in the West we call it "harakiri", but the Japanese really call it seppuku. Yet it is not directly the origin of my pseudo. Once upon a time, I lived in Japan, and visited the beautiful Himeji castle. Inside the castle, there is a small outdoor place called the "Seppuku Maru". It is a place specially designed for the convenient practice of the seppuku, with a well. A dishonored Japanese lord would come to this place with his servant, then give himself the fatal blow in the bowels. Then, instead of laying on the ground for hours waiting for death to come, the servant would take the katana and behead the lord. The fatal blow was given by the lord himself, the loyal servant only helped him end his suffering - how considerate of him! He would then clean the katana in the well. For a bloody story, that's a story to impress imagination.

Years later I was on a website that asked me to login with my name, and I didn't want to put my real name in it. So I used "Seppuku Maru" as my first name / last name credentials. And the day I created a login in GC Boards, I was out of ideas and just used "Seppuku".

Why I'm still keeping this journal
Yes, initially it was just my notes to track my improvements. But now I keep writing here, because a) I got addicted to write, and b) I want this to be an exhaustive document, a testimony, of the huge changes that came in my life, and in my mindset, since I started this. It is already interesting to watch the differences between now in three years ago. Besides, I'm far from done with learning seduction. Apart from mastering the date to lay process, there are other things to learn. Finding new ways to meet girls is one. And learning how to get and manage relationships is another. Among others things...

My initial approach to relationships
When I started to get dates in 2014, I used to have two children at home. No way I was going to come with a stream of girls. So when I got a cute girl that I liked, I would normalize the relationship, introduce her to my kids, then have her share our family life. It was the easiest way to compromise sex, girls, and my kids at home. My first girlfriend (Rachel in my early posts) disappeared after two months (my previous post), but I quickly got another (I called her Lucy here). Well the emotional involvement with her went higher than I imagined, so I ended up spending more time with her and less finding new girls. But 5 months later, she had to end up her job and return to the Philippines.

After August 2015
After spending some weeks touring in the Philippines with her for vacation (a memorable trip), I ended up alone again in August, ad this time without my kids. Much more free time and freedom, my game exploded. But soon (late 2015) I realized that laying girl after girl just for the sake of laying, served little meaning in itself. Like Hector posted recently, there is value in having a higher laycount. You have much more reference points and can evaluate a situation more accurately and more quickly. You have a "winner effect" which transcribes into a more sexual vibe, and makes it easier to get more girls. But then, getting girls and letting them go is a little bit of a waste. Once in a while, there was one girl that I would have wanted to see again. But back then, I still had retention problems.

My idea of why we do seduction
Reality is that most men (and it was certainly my case, in my pre-marriage years) get into relationships by pure passivity (willing to relax and secure access to sex). And once they're into one, they just relax and are completely unaware of the relationship dynamics. This is the realm of girls, and soon, by lack of awareness they wake up into a relationship completely controlled by the woman. Problem being, when they finally realize it, it is too late because too many bad precedents have been established, and the relationship is overwhelmingly in the woman's favor. Another thing happening is, as the man settle and relax into the relationship, he omits to keep sexual options. As a result, his sexual market value plummets, his dependency on his girl (and neediness) increases, and her attraction for him drops. This doesn't happen to her, because she's keeping sexual options opened at all time (all the orbiters kept at arms length, plus all the new guys hitting on her). Any time she's angry with her man, she can walk into a bar with a miniskirt and get fifteen phone numbers. Whereas the guy who relaxed and forgot to keep options is basically screwed, clueless about what is happening and at the mercy of the girl, who can now start pulling the strings. Think about it, that's why she's so eager for you to commit because she will have upper hand to run the dance. Add to this a societal and legal framework that makes things immensely easier for the woman (at least in the West).

So I finally came up with this idea: Seduction is a way of getting better relationships with girls, with terms more favorable to the man. With seduction skills, you maintain your sexual market value at all time, and therefore can use the ultimate relationship management tool: the Power of the Next (see Drexel Scott's article). You keep her into the sexual competition. This helps to keep her on her toes (you remain a challenge for her), and restores the balance of power in the relationship.

What it means to be a man
The man is the one building value, by applying his skills and wits and hard work at creating wealth and safety. The woman needs this value for her own comfort and safety, therefore she needs to attach herself such a man and feed on his strength. She needs the man, more than the man needs her. On the other hand, the man is designed by nature to try and fuck as many women as he can. Not all guys can achieve that though, partly because both society and women brainwash them into thinking he has to "become mature" and "settle for one woman". Because he submits to this "feminine imperative", he ends up being depending on his woman for sex, stuck into a relationship dominated by her, and this, despite the fact that initially she needs him more than he needs her. It's an upside down world!

Upon my realization of the above, I decided that I wanted to live a life true to my nature as a man.

April to December 2016
That was my third step up in learning. From April to June, I got 13 new women, close to one per week. And good news, I didn't have retention problem anymore - I fixed it using a mix of Lover / BF vibe. So now, I could start keeping the girls I liked - all of them. And it actually worked much better than anticipated. From April 16 I started juggling with two or three recuring girls at a time, and had a few extremely busy weeks in June. But the peak was reached in October 2016 with, at some point, four different regular girls in my bed within a week, plus an additional evening out on a date with a prospect. That was starting to be a concern - too busy!

I never had any drama. I soon found out that they all more or less consciously knew the state of things. Some girls suspected it, and questioned me insistingly - I would then tell them the sheer truth. But some others kind of knew intuitively (or guessed), but didn't really want to know the details, and never asked questions. How would I know that? Once in a while I would get a comment like "your girls", or "you have many girlfriends :)", which, of course, I would make a point NOT to deny.

To my surprise, the girls who got me admit my poly-amorous status, would keep seeing me - at least for some time. Jenna knew ( we talked openly about it), had a few ups and downs, but finally continued to see me. Abby my former GF asked, and knew, that I had a few side fucks... She laughed and was OK with it. Jennifer continued to see me for a few weeks after I told her. Lily my Chinese lady knew it but continued to see me for about six months. Miss Y, my current Chinese GF, correctly guessed that my reserve of condom boxes was not for decoration... And we're still together after 6 months. And there were a few more cases with some less regular girls.

How the hell did I achieve that? You normally can't tell a girl straight to her face that you have two or three other girls on the side (well... unless she insists to know). But you can't make her believe that she's the only one. Ultimately, I found a way to incorporate it into my frame. I take great steps not to behave like an exclusive BF. I carefully detect and deflect her subservient BF frame. I'm also guessing that there is a matter of overall congruence: the key is how you come across in the first place.

Since January 2017
Late 2016, two girlfriends got out for some other sources of drama. I was then back to one regular only. I also traveled a lot. Met (and fucked) my ex GF Lucy in the Philippines, went to Kenya and laid two amazing Instagram beauties there, then in daddy mode in France with my kids. In Doha I got a few lays as well. One of them (my fatty FB) was an interesting experience. She's cute but too fat. I almost fucked her out of politeness. However the sex turned out to be quite good! So I kept her on the side. And in March, I met with miss Y, my new Chinese GF. She was visiting some friends in Doha and ended up half naked on my sofa the first time we met. She returned to visit me (she lives in China) two more times since then.

But these will require more posts.
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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October 11: More stuff I tried

Insemination requests
There had already been some precedents. Back in 2015 my GF Lucy had asked me to remove the condom during the act because she "wanted to feel me better". When I objected about unwanted pregnancy she argued that if she would get pregnant she would gladly return to the Philippines and raise the kid. I stayed on my rigid views that a kid should be raised by both mum and dad and denied her the pregnancy. In hindsight, given that I really liked this girl, I regret I didn't do it. She would have been happy.

Things got more serious with my Chinese girlfriend Lily last year. 37 years old and the biggest pair of boobs I remember ever hanging in front of my face. She had been married but back in those days she didn't want children, and even had an abortion once. But with older age coming, she had mixed feelings about this and started desiring kids. From the very early moments of our interaction, she started requesting me to remove my condom. She even went so far as to remove my condom in the middle of a sex session. I did resist. When she removed my condom I threatened to stop the sex altogether - you've got to have some willpower to do that LOL! But finally with time she convinced me that she was not after financial support - just the seed. She seems to be very rich already since she sold her stake in her former business. Alright, so after six months I did remove this condom and come off inside her. Our last meeting in December, though, went awry, and the relationship ended quite abruptly. I never had any news of what happened to my seed after that.

But about three months later I met another Chinese girl (called miss Y here), 30 years old, quite beautiful (an 8.5 in my book), who was on a short visit to our city. Our interaction, and thanks to the fast seduction techniques, left such a high impression on her that she was motivated enough to fly back two times in the country, all the way from China. She was pretty and sweet and the sex was quite extensive. I really liked her, but unfortunately she had some strong manipulative tendencies, which forced me to keep her at arms length to some extent. I had to resist her attempts to frame me as "generous financial donator", then as a boyfriend and potential husband. Ultimately, she finally decided that the best use she could have of me was as a genitor. She explained and convinced me that she was only after the seed, not after financial support, and that she would find herself a Chinese husband to support the kid if she got pregnant. She returned to my city two times (at carefully selected periods of her cycle) and we condomlessly fucked copiously. Last time I heard of her she was pregnant, in a Chinese hospital for a pregnancy sickness, and few days later blocked me on our usual chat media. Full report on this interaction here: The Inseminator Request.

Pleasing myself
In my first two years in seduction, I diligently applied myself to make my girls come - with reasonable success. I also always made sure that the sex would last at least 30 minutes. Doing so, I indeed pleased these girls for sure, but also faced a particular problem: the longer I held myself from coming, the harder it became to eventually come. Must be specific to me - my own orgasm comes easier at the beginning but is harder to get if the intercourse lasts more than say 10 minutes, and if I fail to focus on myself from the very beginning. My workaround solution was a two part intercourse. In the first 30 minutes or so I would focus on her, make sure she comes once or twice, then take a break from sex, cuddle, chat a little. Then after a while go for a second round where, this time, I would focus solely on me and finish off quickly. That strategy would work say 80% of time.

In the process, I discovered one curious thing. A girl that I would have made come two times (or even more), would still be unsatisfied if I didn't come in the end. In spite of my efforts to please her (and her few orgasms) the one single thing she seemed to worry about is that I didn't come. That wouldn't have been a problem if I had focused on solely pleasing myself from the very beginning!

So I started to get a sense that, in fact, maybe everyone would be better off if I stopped all these marathonic fucks trying to please her and went more simple.

This year it so happened that I got a girl that I didn't care too much about. She could just leave if she wasn't happy, I wouldn't care about it. In fact, I almost took her in bed out of pure politeness. So I decided I would try something different with her.

It typically went this way. She would come at home, we would have a quick lunch, then I would draw my dick out and stick it right in front of her face. She would suck me while I hold her hair and control her movement. Then I would turn her on all fours on the sofa and penetrate her directly in doggy style, ride her and ejaculate with 5 to 10 minutes.. No cuddling, no foreplay, just fast, dominant, animal, selfish sex. Didn't bother to make her come or worry about her pleasure. In fact, quite the opposite of what I was usually doing. It was my experiment. I didn't care to lose her after all.

Guess what, not only she liked it, but she came asking for more. She would be the one to go for my dick then turn on her fours, by herself, according to the same scenario. You don't change a winning scenario, so we kept doing the same.

That's how I realized that the girls derive satisfaction from feeling the guy's orgasm, sometimes more than from their own. After that, with new girls, I started putting more emphasis on pleasing myself.

Sexting
Sexting in the initial chats leading up to the first meeting, really wasn't my style. Yet, in April I found myself in a chat with a Tinder cutie with early sexy undertones. I eventually picked up the hints and the chat quickly turned sexy and hot, with naked pictures exchanged. What all this did is to build up anticipation to our meeting. She finally came directly to my home for our very first one to one meeting, and she ended up sucking my dick big time like she said she would. Again, I focused on pleasing myself and finished off doggy style. It was a highly sexy experience. She came back two more times since then. The summer vacations did put an end to our meetings - I was away. There has been a tentative to meet up once more after that which didn't happen for external circumstances. I don't think this is over yet.

After this, I tried it once more with another Tinder match. The way I introduced it, is after she sent me a picture of herself with a cheeky smile:
Me: The question is now open
Her: What question?
Me: Do you have somewhere, some other cheeks? And if yes, are they chubby, too?
Her: Nope. I have two pairs of lips, not cheeks
Me: No need for lipstick on the other lips. They're pretty enough!
Me: I really need to present you to my friend Paul
Her: What about Paul? Is he chubby too?
Me: He's a lovable dick, if I may say so. No legs, but two rear wheels
Her: Hahaha... I love the wheels!
Me: He can drive slow and long. Or accelerate
Her: I love it when it accelerates
Me: Yeah, but only close to the finish line
Her: Definitely, and when your friend Mr Paul also starts digging into the hole
Me: Anyway he's a good guy, I'm sure you would like him. And I'll appreciate seeing all these lips!
etc...

Again, this paved up the way to an easy first time sex. We met, had a drink, I brought her home, and she ended up sucking me. Unfortunately she was on her period and wouldn't do it. But it was a nice experience.

If it can be introduced smoothly, sexting seems to work! At least with some DTF women. Unfortunately I haven't tried more so far, but it is a way worth exploring.
 

mindful

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Mar 16, 2014
Messages
256
I love sexting girls.

I was actually going to do a post on this because you can hook girls really hard with this if she is receptive to it. I was able to visit and stay with a girl in another state by connecting with her and eventually getting into daily sexting sessions. Of course we did some video chats too to feel the vibe out.

I also had a girl that was willing to come fly to me back in the winter months from heavy sexting for a few weeks.

However, after doing it for a while, or a few times you will see it is a big time sink. Sext wisely and with caution ;)
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Hey mindful,

thanks for your input. It seems sexting is like other forms of texting, do it only if there is an upcoming time slot to meet her in real very soon!

The other thing I see about sexting, is that it is potentially polarizing. Some girls will be open and receptive, and with these girls the sexting will pave the way for quick and hot sex. But it will also turn off some other girls, not so receptive, that you could have otherwise had if you had proceeded more smoothly.

Yes, to be employed wisely.

Seppuku
 

Sandman

Cro-Magnon Man
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Apr 18, 2016
Messages
359
I agree with both of you

Another situation where sexting might be of use is where you are not exactly eager to meet up with a girl e.g. she's not that hot or you think she might be a prude hence too much effort, you can test the waters by some light sexting (then get heavier as the case may be). Some girls will suprise you and this may prevent you from missing an easy lay :)
 

Sandman

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Apr 18, 2016
Messages
359
Seppuku said:
@mrre: very good point too!

Oh and by the way, congrats on your Cro Magnon status, you rose quite fast!

Thank you! :)
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
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Location
Middle East, Asia, Africa
November 16th - the Last Entry

This Journal has absorbed me since 2014. I have tried to make it as exhaustive as I could, in describing my various successes and failures, and thought process, in this Journey into Seduction. And it has been such an amazing discovery along the way. I never imagined I would reach where I am today when I started! However today I think it is the right moment to conclude this Journal.

Joining in August 2014, I had initially learned a lot from reading these Boards, as well as the main GC site. Later on, I started recording my progresses here, and in the last year, went on to give back to the community by helping as much as I could the newer guys around here. But it is now time to step back from the Boards and use my private time for other things. I am planning to quit my current job sometime soon, and make a living from managing my personal investments. I am also thinking of starting one (or more) blogs. One business blog where I plan to write on the topics of Finance, Personal Finance, and Investment management. And maybe also a "lifestyle" blog that will be focusing on relating my travels and various life experiences - maybe including girls :) but hopefully a soft-core version of what I wrote here. I will need to use my time and creative energy to build up some written material for these.

Yet, my journey into Seduction is by no means finished. This year I had to switch priorities, and thus reduce the time spent in finding new girls (only 8 new lays this year, as opposed to 20+ last year). I will eventually continue where I left things, hopefully in 2018. But from now on, it will be in my private journal. Among the things I want to do now is exploring relationship management.

So for this last post, I went around the Boards and recorded the links of all my main Field Reports, as well as some of the more interesting contributions I had on the Boards. I summarize them all here. That's 29 full LRs. My other lays are duly documented in this Journal.

My first Field Report in Q4 2014:
FR++: Joanne

My Initial successes in Q1-Q2 2015:
LR: Kenyan woman Nicky
LR-: Julie from Kenya
LR-: Fingering Lucy on my sofa Includes full LR update in the end.
LR: Isabella

FU: The day I finally got it My latest write up. It inserts here chronologically. It is in fact the must instructive failed date I've ever had. It helped me to fix my mindset, and I got my lessons right.

What followed was my first stream of consistent successes in Q3-Q4 2015:
LR: Improvised cooking date
LR: First meet straight to my home
LR: Naomi - same day lay
LR: Elisa
LR--: Sheila
LR: Singapore. Charlene
LR: Bangkok. Olivia
FR++: Iris and her awesome boobs
LR: Samia from Ethiopia
LR: Chinese beauty Ina, ten months later
LR: Gina and BlackDragon's system
LR: The Lao girl

Standalone LR in Q1 2016:
LR: Laurie - interesting turnaround

Breaking my first dry spell and next leg up in seduction, Q2-Q3 2016:
FR++: Ginger from China - LMR Includes full LR update in the end
LR: 28 years old Kenyan girl - beating the LMR
FR++: Girl from Hong Kong
LR: Jennifer - craving for sex but high ASD
LR: Miss M, super horny
LR: Ann, hungry woman
LR: Cindy from Philippines
LR: Chinese Lily with a humongous pair
LR: A week in the Philippines - Miss Z stunning beauty Probably the most beautiful woman I've ever had.
LR: Sexy Gianna from Kenya, first date two girls at home
LR: The blind date Where I met my "regular" Ann.
LR: Jackie the self pulling beauty another great experience with the natural wonders of the Philippines!
LR: Close encounter of the third kind
With Lily, Gianna, Ann from The blind date, and Jennifer (the last LR above), the stage is set for my experience in multiple relationships. From this point onward, I will spend more time with my existing relationships rather than pulling out new numbers, and will only post LRs if they have something meaningful (and not a boring repeat of the same old). Everything else, though, is reported in this Journal.

Here are the later posts, Q4 2016 onward:
LR: Chrissy - persistence paid in the end
LR: Triple hit in Nairobi another crazy experience from my travels.
LR: The Inseminator Request

A few other useful posts I made on the Boards:
All time favorite feminine frames - and their meaning
Touch routine and physical escalation
The "I will let you know" shit test See my explanation of why it happens, and how to handle it.
Lunch Date, went great, missed the close My answer to NJB about his situation.
My mistakes about a girl and request for guidance Many good responses from many people to greendavid. I undertook to coach him. A difficult task!

And that's it for this Journal!

Cheers,
Seppuku
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Location
Middle East, Asia, Africa
September 6th: Rebirth

Hey GC world, hope all is well!

It's been about ten months since I last posted here, and I actually missed it. I probably won't write a comprehensive account of all my feminine adventures as I used to do, but probably a good update once in a while - and I am not going to limit myself to purely seduction concerns. Alright so let's go!

Doha, Qatar

Earlier in this journal I had a period when I thought it would probably be best not to disclose the city and country where I currently live as an expat. (As for myself, I am a French national). After all, it is *in principle* forbidden to do all what I have reported here. I realize more and more that, in fact, the authorities of this country couldn't care less what I am doing, as long as it doesn't make visible bubbles at the surface. All they care, for the sake of societal order, is to keep the appearance of calm surface waters. OK, so, no bubbles. But there is no need to be overly secretive. And besides, my city is already written all over this journal.

Last year, there has been a serious diplomatic crisis between this tiny country and its neighbors. No need to emphasize here what is already in the news. But suffice it to say that this crisis is still on-going. The more serious consequences have been averted (the country restored its supply chains through other channels, and harnessed its enormous money reserves to support the banking system). For the last year or so, life has resumed exactly the same as before, like nothing happened. But there are signs, here and there, of economic impact - small businesses at least seem to be suffering. Even my real estate rental company decided to lower my rent without even me asking. LOL. But as the market price of hydrocarbons is rising again, it seems that this country will keep the financial muscle it needs to go through a long period of status quo with the neighbors.

One of the positive outcomes, at least, seem to be that the country is engaging into progressive reforms. Last year the visa requirements for traveling to Qatar have been dropped significantly. And a few days ago, the requirements to seek an "exit permit" (one of the medieval legacies of this country) have been dropped. It's litterally free traveling in and out of this country for the residents now). For the records, the same requirements existed before in the UAE before and were dropped about 15 years ago. Our country is now following the path of Dubai it seems, which is a good thing.

Another thing, the huge modernization effort on infrastructures that has started maybe 15 years ago, seem to be converging at last. All these years, living in Doha was akin to living in the middle of a gigantic construction work. Well, it is not finished, but it is now starting to look very good. In fact, we are starting to look at one very fine city. In my case I lived here for the last 7 years, and I do feel at home here.

Weightlifting

Last year as part of my 2017 objectives on fundamentals, I started seriously lifting weights for the very first time of my life. And I got addicted. Initially 30 minutes a week (LOL) I quickly went to two hours a week, and by mid 2017 up to six weekly hours. I was doing things like high reps isolation, dumpbell exercises. It felt good! However by early 2018, when it came to assessing the results, in terms of muscle mass gained, it was not that impressive. I had to change something. And this is when I came across the concepts of heavy lifts. It was initially a comment on these boards by Drck, regarding 5 reps routine. I quickly came across the stronglifts.com website and I got immediately convinced. I started early March this year, and in six months I have much more progress to show for, than on one year of lifting dumbbells.

The sort of routine I do now, and my current records:
Deadlift. 107.5kg for 5 reps, or 120kg for one rep.
Barbell back squats. 85kg for 4 sets of 5.
Bench press. 65kgs for 4 sets of 5. 72.5kgs for one rep
Barbell bent-over rows (Pendlay style): 70 kgs for 4 sets of 5.
To this core, I add some overhead press, some dips, some chinups, and barbell twenty-ones. I have some occasional complementary exercises with heavy dumpbells, such as dumbbell bench press (24 kgs each hand), or hip huggers (18 kgs each hand), or arnold presses. These days I exercise about 4 hrs a week, with at least 48 hours rest between two sessions. I also dropped alcohol considerably (like two glasses of wine per week).

Well, that's after 6 months of my new routine, and improving progressively. In terms of results, here are my (estimated) body stats (I'm 5'9'' or 175 cms)
April 2017. 58 kgs lean body mass. 75 kgs total weight. 22.7% body fat.
September 2018. 65 kgs lean body mass, 80 kgs total. 18.8% body fat.
As a 49 years old man, my goal is to be able to keep my body fat below 18%. So currently I could drop a couple kilos around my waist. But otherwise it is a big improvement in appearance. I don't think it is realistic for me to go much below 17%. I've been overweight (and sometimes very overweight) most of the last twenty years, and I have some stubborn fats around the waist that always refused to leave no matter how hard I dieted. Well, so be it. 18% target is already a good objective if I get there and stay there.

My blog

This was a project which was on my mind for quite some time, and I have mentioned it here several times. Well, it is now online as per September 3rd. Here we go:

The Doctor's Diary - A Gentlemen's Lifestyle Blog

It is about the topics of interest to me, namely (but not exclusively) Women, Money, Health, and Travel.

Regarding Women, I am not so much discussing about pickup techniques (this is best done by Girls Chase), but more about dating mindset and women psychology. Regarding Money, it is possible that I will spawn it into a separate blog in the future, but for now it is part of this Diary. The other topics, I am planning to have some occasional posts but it won't be the main theme. The whole thing is my first experiment with blogging (I mean besides this Journal!), let's see how it goes.


Alright, that's already a lot for today. I have more updates, especially regarding women. But I'll do that in a future post here!

Cheers gentlemen!

Seppuku
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Joined
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Messages
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Middle East, Asia, Africa
What happened with Women

Before I get started, I want to post some news a about my blog. It has been 4 weeks now, and received about 110 unique visitors, all traffic coming from the links in my signature here in GC. Registration in Google was not completely straightforward, but now that I understand how it works, I make sure that all my posts are indexed. Thus far I got no hit yet coming from Google. I suppose it is a matter of time, there must be an initial lucky hit, then some momentum building. In the mean time, I have to work on beefing up the content, and on my marketing: so I have just started a twitter account to support my blog: @thedocsdiary. The blog itself is here: The Doctor's Diary.

For you guys who have visited it, thank you for the support, I hope you enjoyed it! And stay tuned, because I am posting about once a week. So now to my new Journal entry.


When I started this Journal, I made a point to be as exhaustive and transparent as I could about my learning journey. I wanted this to be a document of my experience. But now that I have somewhat managed to establish myself, I do no longer feel the need to document everything, and I won't do that. However I will try to keep some regular updates here about the most interesting developments with women. So let's go.

Lucy

Lucy (not her real name) is the first girlfriend I made using the GirlsChase concepts. The initial LR is here, and she's all over the place in this Journal, for instance see here for a summary of the history. In a nutshell, I have always been open to her that I'm not planning to marry or have more children. Yet we kept in touch after she returned to the Philippines, and managed to meet on 3 occasions in 2016-2017. The last time being in mid Feb 2017.

After our week of vacation in February 2017, we remained in regular touch by text... Until about April 2017, when she stopped responding and went silent. Well, I thought, there must be another man in the picture. She'll be back as soon as the fling is over. Until June 2018. No news from her for one year, that was strange. So I ventured to look her profile picture in Facebook (I never connect my girls in Facebook, so I can only see the public pics)... And surprise, she was showing herself with baby in her arms. Her status was Married, living in Denmark. LOOL. So I texted her again. Yes, it was her baby, and she was now married to a Danish man, and all lived in Denmark.

Well after all, I was not in a position to give her as much, so it's only fair that she found another guy. But the funny thing is, her son is born around December 2017. WTF? So he must have been conceived at most within a month after I last met her. LOL! Either she found an emergency husband, or the guy must have already been in the picture when I last met her. In fact, that would explain the slight changes in behavior that I noticed in her when I last met with her. Another case of Dr Seppuku and the Forgotten Provider? I will never know with 100% certainty.

Well, I have zero bad feeling about this, and glad that she managed to secure herself a life and family.

But it made me think.

Time passes, and ultimately all these pretty sexy darlings will have to move on with their lives, settle and make families and babies. That's life! And I did the same in my own time. So it's going to be one of two things. Either I settle with one and give her the family she needs. Or they all leave me one after the other, and condemn me to rotate new girls forever. The last one is not necessarily a bad option... as long as I'm able to bring new girls. I've been gifted with favorable genetics which make me look 8 - 10 years younger than my age. But how long is this going to last?

Miss K from Kenya

This is one of the girls I met in my LR Triple Hit in Nairobi. OK, we all have different tastes and standards when it come to girls, but in my book she's at least a 9.

About Black Girls. And while we are at it, the various feedback I have gotten around me from white guys is that, in general, they are not that much attracted to black girls. I, for my part, had always had some attraction for black girls (mostly from the porn movies) but felt some sort of apprehension to "make the step". Until I made it. The LR of my first experience with a black girl is here, and Gosh! it was one of my most memorable sexual experience to this day. I never regretted I made that step. Moreover, I got many more black girls after that. So let me say that it is a pity that they (seemingly) receive poor appreciation from white guys (as much as I can tell from the guys around me). They make for extremely feminine and sexy women, and if you are into the hourglass body type like I am, prepare yourself for a sexual commotion. But well, if you guys don't like black girls, after all it makes a bigger share for myself :)

So back to miss K. It was probably my smoothest seduction ever, almost the textbook classic example of what seduction should be. We spent a whole day together and it was very nice. Unfortunately some misunderstanding in text prevented us to meet again the next day. When I left Nairobi I was careful to leave the doors open, then I returned to Doha and moved on to other girls. Big silence, until, a few months later, she suddenly came back on my Instagram page, and started to like all my pics... prompting me to resume contact by messaging. Then another two months later, she reestablished texting on my Whatsapp, like "hey....". Well I had to do something. So I gave her a bait, hinting at coming again and visit Mombasa. Positive reaction to my bait. So I moved forward, and decided to book a trip to Mombasa... and invite her to join me there. I had a lot of hesitation, and at the last minute I almost cancelled. So what if she flakes and doesn't show up? Or what if she comes along with two friends? or whatever. But I held on, and in fact all went well. I went there, we met, had fantastic time, mind-blowing sex. And it actually felt girlfriendish. I mean in a good way. Nice surprise! After that, I booked more trips to Kenya. Each time we met, it was a great time, and she always behaved like a loving woman. It felt good. And the sex was always great.

I made mistakes, too. All the rules we learn in seduction context, such as balanced investment, and compliance, should continue to apply just as much, if not more, in the context of an on-going relationship. By "balanced investment", we actually mean 2/3 investment from her, and 1/3 from him. I did relax this rule progressively. Mistake. I also became less demanding of her in terms of standards. Another mistake.

But there was an even bigger mistake I did without noticing. I was needy for a relationship. Yes, she's the one who initially re-initiated contact. But then, it had been increasingly coming from me. So overall, I had replaced neediness for sex, with neediness for a relationship. But neediness is bad for your frame in general, one form or another. You man reading this, watch out because tomorrow it may be you. So here is the moral of the story:

Seppuku said:
Relationships are the realm of women. Men chase for sex, women chase for relationships. Never, ever reverse the roles! Just enjoy fucking her, as well as the others. And always, always let *her* chase for the relationship. And if she doesn't, never mind, keep getting the sexual pleasure from her. Take whatever she is ready to give you and just enjoy and stop worrying about anything else. And to guarantee that, always have at least one other sexual option.

Our last meeting in March, she said something that made me blow a fuse. I left, and decided to move on. So I just cut contact altogether. I went to and fro about my business, and fucked other girls. But the story was not over. After a month, I started to notice that she was all over the place on my Instagram, liking all my pics, and watching all my stories. And this, guys, was her way of coming back by the small door. It was her, trying to get my attention back. But I pretended I didn't see, and kept her chasing. Eventually, by late June, she texted me on Whatsapp. We have been resuming contact progressively over the summer (I was busy all summer in full time daddy mode). In September, we got a few video calls, and agreed to another visit in Nairobi.

So. My plan is to give it another shot, but this time I will watch my frame and make sure I don't fall back into the same mistakes. The most important thing is to keep her demanding this. My frame is, I enjoy fucking her (always such a pleasure), and let her work to demand more. Let us see if it works better.

Upcoming trip to Philippines again

And to make sure that I keep my outcome independent frame, I will make another trip to the Philippines before the year end. From my last trip in June (LR here) I kept a few contacts and more interesting leads. There is this miss Arlyn with whom the sex was very exciting. But I'm hoping to score some new girls too. And while I'm at it, let us mention here an interesting development.

In this Philippines LR, I mentioned about Jen, a girl I pulled. We didn't meet again because, she said, she was "afraid to fall in love", and because by then I had taken Arlyn to bed instead. I barely heard about Jen after that.

But one day, like a over a month after I returned in Doha, I got a surprise message from a complete unknown young woman, let's call her Diane, 20 years old. It turns out that she's a close friend of Jen. She somewhat heard about me, and managed to get my number from Jen. Whatever was discussed between the two? And in what details? I have no idea. But the fact is, this girl has been chasing me on Whatsapp many times a week, for about two months now. While she is not exactly the most pretty girl I have ever seen, she's still OK, and I must absolutely do something about it. I have kept her chasing by playing a frame of "you're too girlish, I like grown up women". She will have to qualify herself as a woman. Let us see that!
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,986
Location
Australia
Hello broheim, or can I say Dr. broheim :)

It is great to see that your seduction life is still going swimmingly and congratulations on the website. I will certainly give it a good read at the earliest opportunity. My interests are also going in that direction.

I just spotted this:
Either I settle with one and give her the family she needs. Or they all leave me one after the other, and condemn me to rotate new girls forever. The last one is not necessarily a bad option... as long as I'm able to bring new girls. I've been gifted with favorable genetics which make me look 8 - 10 years younger than my age. But how long is this going to last?
I can advise from personal experience: do not settle and take the easy road. Well in the distant past I did have this dilemma and I put it to Leticia thus: at a certain point you will want a proper relationship and children. I cannot give you that, I already have children and when I see a new girl I am going to go and speak to her, I don't want to be tied down as it is not my nature. So I think it would be unfair of me to go into a serious relationship and take away years of your life when I am not planning to settle. Therefore it is best that we break up before getting more serious. And she cried and accepted this and we broke up. Well, had I stuck to that things would be very different now. You need to think along these lines and stick to it, however difficult or painful it is in the short term. Trust me that even as an old man with a cane you would value your independence more than compromising and settling. Even in little things like how you spend leisure hours or how you arrange the furniture in your home. Much as you may plan to reserve areas of decision making for yourself and act like the GC-inspired boss that you are, unfortunately a lot of your relationship tools are nullified after she moves in. And also she sees the real you, in times of tiredness or vulnerability it's hard to be a boss. So the natural state of these things is decay into a dependent mindset and lifestyle. Don't start the decay.

cheers,
Ray
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Location
Middle East, Asia, Africa
Ray!

Welcome back. Well, you've got a Ph.D. now if I'm right? So now you're as much a Doctor as I am :)

Thanks for your input, it is invaluable.

And it actually connects with my own past experience, as well as from what I have seen around me from close relatives. Yes, very hard to keep the alpha frame when you're tired or vulnerable. So you say no matter what, the ultimate final state in a live-in,committed relationship is beta. I am wondering, though, how much the understanding of the underlying man-woman dynamics, of the frames involved, of the importance of keeping status, etc... How much would all that actually improve your chances at a more balanced relationship?

But you may very well be right. I am not looking forward to see what happen when I'm 70 with woman 20 years older than me. Probably better to be alone and independent. Like Franco (from francoseduction.com) said: "It is a lonely business to be a man!"

Conclusion, I may very well end up rotating girls forever after.

Your feedback on my blog is very welcome if you have a chance to pass by.

Cheers,
Seppuku
PS. And I've been keeping an eye on your adventures on your Journal.
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Location
Middle East, Asia, Africa
Typo:
But you may very well be right. I am not looking forward to see what happen when I'm 70 with woman 20 years younger than me. Probably better to be alone and independent. Like Franco (from francoseduction.com) said: "It is a lonely business to be a man!"
. LOL!
 

Ambiance

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Oct 8, 2015
Messages
497
Location
Beyond the Great Vast Forest
Re: What happened with Women

Seppuku said:
But it made me think.

Time passes, and ultimately all these pretty sexy darlings will have to move on with their lives, settle and make families and babies. That's life! And I did the same in my own time. So it's going to be one of two things. Either I settle with one and give her the family she needs. Or they all leave me one after the other, and condemn me to rotate new girls forever. The last one is not necessarily a bad option... as long as I'm able to bring new girls. I've been gifted with favorable genetics which make me look 8 - 10 years younger than my age. But how long is this going to last?

You've got me thinking too. What's the endgame for those of us who never truly settle down? Especially as we grow older? This is a subject that doesn't get covered very often in the Seduction Community, probably because most guys in it are younger/less future-oriented. What comes after Absolute Abundance?

I guess you could go the Hugh Hefner route. Or do something like what BlackDragon wants to do with an OLTR and a rotation of girls he is a sugar daddy to.

About Black Girls. And while we are at it, the various feedback I have gotten around me from white guys is that, in general, they are not that much attracted to black girls. I, for my part, had always had some attraction for black girls (mostly from the porn movies) but felt some sort of apprehension to "make the step". Until I made it. The LR of my first experience with a black girl is here, and Gosh! it was one of my most memorable sexual experience to this day. I never regretted I made that step. Moreover, I got many more black girls after that. So let me say that it is a pity that they (seemingly) receive poor appreciation from white guys (as much as I can tell from the guys around me). They make for extremely feminine and sexy women, and if you are into the hourglass body type like I am, prepare yourself for a sexual commotion. But well, if you guys don't like black girls, after all it makes a bigger share for myself :)

You're gonna have to share with me thanks to your writing;) Reading your journal over the years actually influenced me to go after chocolate this past summer. And I'm very glad to have done so- black girls are HAWT.

Seppuku said:
Relationships are the realm of women. Men chase for sex, women chase for relationships. Never, ever reverse the roles! Just enjoy fucking her, as well as the others. And always, always let *her* chase for the relationship. And if she doesn't, never mind, keep getting the sexual pleasure from her. Take whatever she is ready to give you and just enjoy and stop worrying about anything else. And to guarantee that, always have at least one other sexual option.

We all make this mistake eventually. Kudos to you for being self-aware about it. I don't doubt your upcoming trip will involve any mistakes on your part.
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Location
Middle East, Asia, Africa
Re: What happened with Women

Ambiance,

Thanks for stopping by!
Ambiance said:
You've got me thinking too. What's the endgame for those of us who never truly settle down? Especially as we grow older? This is a subject that doesn't get covered very often in the Seduction Community, probably because most guys in it are younger/less future-oriented. What comes after Absolute Abundance?
Yes right! Most of the seduction community doesn't seem to have much objective beyond the "get another chick on your notch". There is a whole dimension which is ignored. Your laycount goes over 50, or 100, and then what?

But reality catches up eventually. When you're younger, sooner or later you will have desire for children and family. Or, you end up with a girl whom you really like, but sooner or later she wants children and family. What do you do then?

The situation is in fact easier for an older guy like me, in that I already have children. That checkbox has already been checked. I don't HAVE to do it again.

In fact I agree with Ray. Giving up the independence just because I may no longer get chicks one day is not worth it. Maybe then, when I reach this stage I'll be better off the sugar daddy route. Even if it is not an option I'm considering at the moment.

You're gonna have to share with me thanks to your writing;) Reading your journal over the years actually influenced me to go after chocolate this past summer. And I'm very glad to have done so- black girls are HAWT.
Glad I made a convert!

We all make this mistake eventually. Kudos to you for being self-aware about it. I don't doubt your upcoming trip will involve any mistakes on your part.
You make these mistakes when you start relaxing in a relationship and drop the guard. But a man cannot afford to lower the guard with a woman, ever. It is tough in fact!

By the way Ambiance, I see that you continue raking up LRs after LRs, you're getting consistently good, congrats! The Cro Magnon status shouldn't be far away now :)

Seppuku
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Location
Middle East, Asia, Africa
What happened with Women, part II

The girls in Doha
In the last year or so, I found that the quality and quantity of girls on the dating apps are both going down, not sure why. There was even this period, in October 2017, where I would open Badoo and see about 8-10 girls online - for the whole of the city (which counts 2.7M people). 8 to 10! And engaging them by chat was simply a challenge. Of course! Because there were probably dozens of guys online at the same time, and the girls were having the time of their life chatting 10 guys at the same time. You would send a message, and although obviously online, she would not read it before 10 minutes.

On the quality side, it's no longer like in 2015-2016 when you had a lot of genuine girls looking for a boyfriend. In terms of attractiveness, it's mostly HB6 / HB7 girls. Plus, you now have tons of prostitution in any of its many shades. Such as a girl showing abundant skin and stating on her profile "straight to the point!" - i.e. "make me a financial offer". If you chat her, she will never state openly she's a prostitute, but delay as long as possible to announce the color, possibly until after she hit your bedroom (see an example of that Doreen on my last LR): expecting, in fact, that the man is one framing it first as a business deal. Then you have those who expect you to "help them financially", or have a "mutually agreeable deal". If you mention it's money for sex, they would deny and say it's like helping a friend... These dating apps offer now plenty of possibilities to be a prostitute

Actually the girl from this LR gave me an interesting insight on the dating apps problem. There is a significant proportion of the males in this country, who believe in purchasing sex. They would skip the crap and make a financial offer right off the bat. This screws up the whole dynamics. Girls who would rather build real relations get pissed off and leave quickly. And other figure out that well, they might as well make some money and save. The prostitution, after all, is free of social consequences since they will later return to their country and no one would know what they did. So these girls now start to expect the guy to make a financial offer. On the guy side, you don't know at all if you are dealing with a normal girl or another opportunistic prostitute. On the girl side, for a normal girl, you wonder if this guy is just another creepy pig. For an opportunistic would-be sugar baby you wonder why the guy is not making an offer. All screwed up!

And again, it is another illustration of the fact that men's awful behaviors and beliefs are responsible for all the crap in dating.

In spite of that, I still managed to score of few hits in this city... Nothing really too exciting to be honest. But overall I eventually just got sick of all this crap, and focused on traveling instead. In the meantime my pool of FBs here dwindled progressively to zero. In fact, I even ditched the last one because frankly the sex was of poor quality. My life in Doha became essentially focused around my workouts, my job, and starting off my blog.

Lately however, I opened my Badoo and Tinder again. And in fact, it's no longer as bad as last year! And I see sometimes up to 20 or 25 online at once. It is workable again, although the attractiveness hasn't improved much. Problem being, I have met a few girls which are 8 or 9 in my book (I never rate 10). I just find it hard to go down now.

But I should! Just get one or two for now then climb up the food chain. It is important to keep the abundance mentality. For that, I really need to astrain myself to dedicating at least 5 hours a week to dating - the way I used to two years ago. That's what it takes to get started. And this is where this Journal has helped me a lot in the past. You write your objectives then hold yourself accountable. Such as what I did here.

So. Need to kick my ass again. In the end, it's again about beating laziness.

Instagram
My Instagram has been good to me. The followers count is still growing (I now about 1650). And, once in a while, I receive a spontaneous DM of a girl who is obviously interested. Maybe like 15 in the last 6 months?

But now, the problem is that these girls could be anywhere in the world! In the past, I have arranged trips to meet (and fuck) some of my instagram followers. Miss K (in my previous post) is the biggest success story. Unfortunately though,it's not always immediately feasible. And the "beat the iron while it's hot" rule still applies!

I had a few such stories happening this summer - problem was, I had my children with me for a whole 6 weeks! While it was certainly good from the dad perspective, it didn't help my love affairs. Here are a few selected cases.

Crazy IG twerker from Kenya
She is the sort of Instagram girl with 17000 followers while following 39 (including me), posting tons of videos of herself twerking her ass all around in the house. She's the one sending a follow request and texting me first. However in mid July I was just about to be in full time daddy mode for 6 weeks. No way I could have arranged a quick weekend in Kenya to see this crazy hot chick from closer. I tried to make her wait, saying that I won't be available again for travel before at least three months. Then I got busy with paternal life, and she grew crazy that I wasn't initiating chats, and out of the blue blocked me. It got better though, mid September she unblocked me then re-initiated texting. The texting takes a very sexy tone, and she sends pics making no mystery of her boobs and shapes. However when I start to discuss logistics of a quick trip, she suddenly start throwing requests, such as "buy me an iPhone". When I reject the frame, she now rules out sex: "the theme is meeting and knowing one another, nothing sexual". After all the sexual vibes in our texting! I just kill it off.

Miss Goody Two Shoes
(Loving this expression from BlackDragon). Another distant IG follower, very sexy and classy, always dressed nicely business style. She has been throwing a comment here and there on my IG posts whenever I was traveling to her city, on the mode "why you didn't invite me". May 22nd, I comment on one of her stories, she replies, then we start chatting. The mood is good and we connect. A couple of weeks later, I have a two weeks holiday approved. I could do a few days in her city, before flying to the Philippines (my original plan), so I start to discretely poll for her interest in meeting. There is an initially warm reception, followed by an absence of reactivity. I figure it's a risky bet, so I proceed with my initial plan (two full weeks in Philippines - which turned out a very nice trip). However when she sees my IG posts from the Philippines, she reaches out to me in frustration and imply she was expecting me to come. Oh well. We keep in touch until mid July, I get busy in daddy mode, then she disappears (probably another dick in the picture). There is a quick text exchange in September, but it now sounds cold. She's no longer very active in IG as she used to, so I guess there are other things going on with her now. To be continued.

The beautiful attention whore
There is this Philippines girl, based in Doha my city, 36 years old but still a beauty, and we connect in IG about mid May. We really start chatting while I'm on my June trip to the Philippines. We keep in touch, she's teasing and flirty, then when I return from my trip, I immediately arrange a date with her. It's my birthday actually and she immediately agrees. She turns to our date with a beautiful red dress. She's very hot in her dress and heels, with her long black hair on her naked shoulders. The birthday date is good, and I invite her for some music at my home right after it... But when I start getting closer from her, I feel her withdrawing. And I immediately recognize the symptoms: she likes the attention from the man, more than the man, so she keeps the man at a distance, giving him just enough to keep him around. No sex happens that evening, and the next few days I am confirmed in my diagnostics over texting. The remedy prescribed by Dr Seppuku in this case is to simply scale back your attention and get her chasing. Which I do. There are many attempts at another date, most of them derailed, but we finally have another (quick) meeting, where she still has this behavior of keeping me at bay. But then I have my children at home and get busy. When she understand I'll be busy for 6 weeks, she just silently unfollow me - I unfollow her back right away, and it's all done.

In her defense, the story I gathered from her is, she is a working expat mum. She once got a boyfriend here, who after a while moved to Dubai and asked her to leave her job and follow him. But that would have serious consequences. How long would she need to get another job? How is she going to remit money to her family? So she turned down the offer, and (I guess) renounced to be seriously involved with another man... Going for their attention instead.

Another Doha-based, single mum, Philippines beauty
We connect in IG maybe mid June then she engages me when she sees my posts from the Philippines mid June. Asks if I'm traveling alone. LOL. "Yes, alone. Just two or three girlfriends in my luggage, in case I'm hungry :)". Then we start to chat. She's another single expat mum (husband died some years back), remitting money to her family. She is a real beauty, but I soon start to sense the hard celibate case. We connect well in IG. But when I'm back in Doha I don't have a chance to ask her out. I was busy with the other girl above - seems I picked the wrong choice. Then my kids are here, then it grows cold.

In summary, IG offers plenty of very nice possibilities of a much higher quality than the dating apps. With the exception of the attention whore, these were all girls where I stood a good chance I think. But due to circumstances, I couldn't get to them in good time. In Instagram too, the rule is to beat the iron while hot, because these things are transient. The fact that the hot lady may be far away makes it even more complicated.

IG: Important takeaways
In fact they're not so different from the ones I got from dating apps, but the timescale involved is a bit more lax.

Rules for timing:
  • 1. You need to be able to meet her in person with two or three weeks max
    2. If the opportunity comes too early, it's best not to turn on the heat yet. Staying as neutral as possible for now. Turn the heat later, when condition 1 is met
    3. No need to engage a new girl by DM if rule 1 is not met.
Rules of Long Distance Meeting:
  • 1. Establish her interest for a meeting
    2. Work out a few additional potential options in the area
    3. Inform her a few days before the fact that you are coming to her city
    4. Don't make it look like you're coming purposefully to see her - that would be the pedestal again.
    5. Place her in front of the fact: "I am here until Sunday..." If she is interested, she will make time.
    6. In case of last minute trouble, fallback on secondary options
    7. All this, within two or three weeks of first contact with her, as per rules of timing above.
The idea is to avoid anticipating a meeting for too long, and have her expectations grow either way. The killer thing is to build up the anticipation of meeting for months. It is going to make big bubbles in her head, and the bubbles will grow out of control. Telling her two days before kill the bubbles in the womb so to speak.

There is an extra rule. For as much as I like to sexualize a conversation in online game, it can be counterproductive for long distance meeting. If she grows the expectation that it's going to be about sex, she will face lots of ASD, and may end up blowing it in the course of a few days. Much better to keep her guessing.

  • 8. Prior to meeting, you can be teasing and sexy, but avoid to imply the meeting is going to be sexual.
These are the exact rules that worked wonders with miss K in April 2017 - and I actually ended up fucking my secondary option, too! I believe I could have got my crazy twerker easily if I had been able to apply the same rules. But well, like I said it's not always practically possible. Here, it wasn't.

Concluding note: I will have an update regarding the miss K situation (from my last entry here). I went there and met her... But enough for today. I'll keep it for another post.
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Location
Middle East, Asia, Africa
The slooooooow game

I have actually a novel situation to report. Not that I have much expectations that it will ever reach anywhere, but it is sufficiently different and new compared to my usual experiences, that it deserves a mention for scientific purposes.

As people following what I have reported here, I normally meet women out of online dating. When you take a girl on a date out of online dating, there is an underlying assumption, mutually agreed, that this is about dating and mating.

But here I have a case with a 30 years old "career" girl that I met in a business context. She is originated from Ukraine, but lives and work in London - although she travels a lot for her firm. She is Ph.D. educated (I'm Ph.D. myself), she is giving lectures at a prestigious business school, and the kind of gorgeous blonde that many members of this forum have made fuss about over the years.

She is traveling like 2 or 3 times a year in the Middle East, so this story has been kind of long to develop. This is not going to be a textbook seduction case, from a long shot.

March 2017: Initial contact
She sent me an invitation to connect on LinkedIn out of the blue, March 25th 2017, that I accepted with a polite answer, then forgot about it.

But then around June I am pulled into a business meeting, where I listen to sales people making their pitch. Among them a beautiful blonde girl. Later the same night I receive a message "nice to meet you at last", and this is where I realize that this beautiful blonde is the same who connected me three months ago. Let me call her Julie in what follows.

Forward to October 2017, I receive a message from LinkedIn from Julie. This is where, again, I realize that she was in our offices for another sales pitch today, but I simply couldn't make it to the meeting. And now she is suggesting a catch-up over coffee during the weekend. We agree on Saturday, mid-afternoon.

October 2017: First meeting
In my ten years in the Middle East, people who have asked me for a meeting out of LinkedIn, without exception, had something in mind they wanted to ask me. Whether if we have funds to invest in their business, or if I had a job offer, or if I can help them to reach to another person without the organization...

So I go to my first coffee with her, with the expectation that she is going to ask me something - professional favor, or job availability. Needless to say, that set me in the wrong frame from the onset.

But to my surprise, she didn't ask any such thing, and this was an attempt to connect on the personal level! I wasn't ready for that so it caught me off guard... Moreover, I'm surprised that she knows my professional path very well.

But then she was gone on the rest of her business trip to the region. We keep in touch over LinkedIn, a couple of message here and then.

December 2017: Second meeting
Early December, she informs me that she will be around for a short stay the coming weekend. At the time, I was busy with another girl so my evening was taken. We therefore agree on a brunch. Less than favorable, lots of people around us, but that's all I could do.

We have two hours of face time, during which she discreetly asks "where is my family?", which is a proxy to "am I married?", so I tell her I'm divorced with two children. Whereas she had paid last time for the coffee, she lets me pay for the brunch, implicitly accepting the frame of a date. The rest of the weekend I am busy with the other girl so I can't go any further with her.

Ohooooo, so now we have something different, it is getting more and more personal, and less business. We have now switched to Whatsapp. At this stage, there is a slight chase frame in my favor.

May 2018: Third meeting
She visits us along with other sales from her firm, early May 2017. This time, I manage to get an evening out with her. I take her out in one of my usual venues. We are sitted side by side, I try to get her to talk about her, but truth is she is hyper talkative (a good sign) and it is hard to lead the flow of the conversation. We are now physically close, but I now notice that her body language is closed (a bad sign). She is crossing arms and legs. I try to be touchy and get her to open, to no avail. I decide it's not worth to try a pull in these circumstances. We nevertheless have a nice time, then I drive her back.

At this stage, I have some trouble reading the frame. Is this a date? A friends evening out? Or still business colleagues?

We stay in touch. I told her I would be going to the Philippines (and got her curiosity), and when I'm there I send her the socially acceptable pictures.

October 2018: Fourth meeting
End of september she tells me she plans to come in the region in October. I tell her I might be away, so it would be better to coordinate. Which we do. We agree on October 25th. That day, she tries to change the time from 7 to 8pm, but I insist 7pm is better, and we finally agree on 7:15pm. Notice, by the way, she is always punctual to the minute.

When we meet, she is immediately hyper talkative, like 120 words per minute. This sort of hyper excitement is usually very positive, and even sometimes a sign of arousal. I manage to control the flow, we have a good dinner (this time she pays), and I'm getting more personal questions from her, about my kids, my vacations... And she's hyper curious about what the hell I am doing when I travel alone (like I did in the Philippines), which I interpret as, she's wondering if I'm smashing. I, of course, maintain some mystery. She suggests I should visit Ukraine her home country - which I fully agree! She compliments me on my physical shape.

We go in a bar, and now I have more of this closed body language. It occurs to me that maybe she is building a wall, expecting me to break it. So I go for the selfie technique, side by side, I take her in my arms and we have a few selfies. But when the selfies are over, I keep my arm over her. It seems well accepted. As we talk, I start playing with her hair, and running my hand along her bare arm, and taking her hand in mine, etc... Which is well accepted. But it's now late, we had more than oiur share of wine, and time to leave. I suggest that we go to my home listen some music... But she wants to go back. Alright. On the way to the car, I still grab her hand and lead her, which seems to be ok.

After dropping her, she sends me a message that she "super enjoyed", and "super nice evening". Later she is in the plane about to take off, she initiates texting again, with more thanks.

Which I read, even if I didn't get there, it seems I have hit a chord.

My take
In fact, it goes against all rules here. A very slow progression, partly due to the need to reframe from pure business context, to actual dating, and the fact that our meetings happen like once in 6 months. Yet, it also feels like I'm up to something.

My frame started on the wrong foot like I said. But at the same time I kept it strongly masculine at all times, and never flinched at the face of her beauty, and never expressed insecurity or supplication. I did ask her to come home with me, which she knows what it means.

By the degree of self control she displayed when I touched her, I would say she is of the Low Sex Drive, High Self Esteem girl. She has spent the last 4 or 5 years completely invested in her job, Ph.D. and lectures, with probably little time for anything else. If she has a boyfriend (which I doubt), she made sure not to let it show at anytime - which is as good as available. The guys from this sort of professional background are likely to be needy and kissing her ass up all the time, which is a turnoff. Plus, I know for a fact that Ph.D level girls usually appreciate a man who at least match their intellect. This is all speculation, of course.

My guess is, she absolutely needs to be dominated by someone who will smoothly break all her walls.

So, although this is not a textbook seduction case by a long shot, I have the feeling I'm up to something here. The challenge is to progress things at such a slow pace. Let us see where this goes.
 
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