LR++  The Stars Align

NarrowJ

Tribal Elder
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I've gotten dangerously close to a threesome only twice in my life.

The first time, I was 19 years old and snuck in a girl's house when she had a couple other girls staying the night with her. I fucked one of them, fingered and made out with another, and the third girl was a virgin who did nothing but watch (although she touched my junk a couple times at the request of the other two girls haha).

The second time I got oh-so-close was about a year ago. That field report is here, if anyone's interested in reading.

So, Saturday night, I finally lived the dream. I can now die a happy man.

P.S., if you only want to read the juicy parts just scroll down to where it says in bold "Things Get Interesting"


SexyTeacher

This all begins Thursday night, when I'd met a sexy teacher while out at the bar. For all intents and purposes, we'll go ahead and just call her SexyTeacher. I was mingling with a group by the bar, when she had walked up and started talking to a girl who was standing right next to me.

SexyTeacher is slender, about an inch taller than me, maybe 5'11", although she was wearing some big heeled shoes. She has wavy dark hair about 8 inches past her shoulders, with a blond streak dyed into one side in the front. She's wearing glasses, a sleeveless black shirt and tight black pants. Her legs are long and sexy.

After she'd been standing there talking for a minute or two, I hear her say to the other girl: "Geez haha, you know you're a teacher when you have puff paint on your spare change!"

Perfect. I make the connection with the glasses.

Me: You sure pull off the teacher look with those glasses.
SexyTeacher: Oh!... Thanks???... haha
Me: Yeah, so don't be trying to paddle me.... I'm being a good boy.... For now (smile)
SexyTeacher: Haha, well I may as well live up to the stereotype, right?
Me: Right. So you're the new-ish waitress? (I'd seen her here working, and had no idea she cleaned up this well)
SexyTeacher: Yeah. Well, been here about 3 weeks now. I just wanted to do something to make a little extra money, I guess.
Me: And you're here drinking. You can't get enough of this place (smile)
SexyTeacher: I know, right?! I don't really go out all that much anyway, though.
Me: Right on. So how do you like working for [bar owner]? (The bar owner is famous for treating her employees like shit)
SexyTeacher: Oh my god she's terrrrrrrrible.
*insert short rant about bar owner*
Me: That's what I hear from just about everyone. She's always been cool with me, I guess.
SexyTeacher: Ha. Well she's nice to guys. You want to do a shot with me?

I instruct her that it cannot be tequila, so she immediately orders two tequila shots and thinks she's funny. I tell her she's not.

I do the shot anyway, and tell her to come outside with me to smoke. (I'd spotted her cigs sticking out of her purse on the bar)

We go out to the beer garden and I sit down next to her on a bench. I place my hand down on her leg and ask her where she teaches at (grade school here in town), what grade-level (kindergarten), if she likes it (she does), what made her want to be a teacher (said she kind of "fell into it"), and so on and so forth.

We'd been sitting here talking long after finishing the cigarettes. She starts telling me about how her boyfriend got a DUI last weekend and texted her a bunch of nasty stuff like fuck off and you're a cunt and slut and blah blah blah. I say, "You're boyfriend, as in you didn't break up with him after that?", and she says "Oh, well haha no we're not together at all anymore. Not after that. Guess I'm used to calling him that."

I may be in here, but I'm not quite sure. Fuck it. I change the subject for a minute so when I ask her if she wants to go back to my place it doesn't seem like it was a direct reaction to her telling me she's available.

When I think the boyfriend subject has faded sufficiently, I tell her I have to get going. I have my left arm wrapped around her waist now.

Me: Well, I have to get going. But this has been fun, and we should definitely continue this conversation. How do you suppose we do that?
SexyTeacher: Sure! Here, I'll give you my number.
Me: Well, you're going to do that anyway haha. (squeezing her into me with my left arm that's around her waist). I live like 2 minutes that way (pointing in the direction). You should stop by before you head home.
SexyTeacher: Oh, it's already so late! I'd really like to, but 6 AM comes early.
Me: Well, you're only staying for a few minutes and then I'm kicking you out. (smile)
SexyTeacher: (Smiles back) I'd really like to, but tonight is not good.

She said that ("tonight is not good") rather flatly, so I leave it at that. I tell her as we stand up, "Well you better give me a hug!" and she does, and we say goodbye and I leave.

The mistake I likely made there was that the contrivedness was a bit transparent. I told her I had to get going like I was just calling it a night, but invited her along. I didn't get her back to my place (likely because of my little blunder there), but she gave me her number, and what I want is now rather obvious... ;-)
We text and she says she's going out for a friends birthday Saturday and invites me to that. I already have plans with a FB of mine, so I say we'll play it by ear and try for something early next week.


StrawberryBlonde

I'd been seeing this girl once a week or so since meeting her via a friend. Field report is here, if you want some background. I've set expectations pretty well with her, I think. She's cool with things being casual. She's kind of wild, anyway. Not quite party-girl territory, but she's one of those that's out all the time.

Fast forward to Saturday.

Again, I had plans to go with her to see a friend of her's play acoustic guitar at a bar. We were supposed to go eat somewhere first, but she texted me about 7 PM telling me they (her and her two friends) were going to be late, and to just go ahead and eat. I tell her I'm going up to the bar to eat, and to just come up there when they're ready.

I go up and sit at the bar and order a chef salad, and SexyTeacher is working over on the restaurant side and comes and talks to me for a couple minutes. Says she can't wait to get off work. She says to the bartender as she's waiting for her drinks, "I would do some nasty, filthy, things for a beer right now" and they laugh. I laugh and ask when she gets off work. She says 9:30 or so, and asks me when me and my friends are going out. I tell her I'm waiting on them now.

SexyTeacher gets back to work and StrawberryBlonde shows up with her two friends. StrawberryBlonde sits in a chair to my right, and the other girls stand beside/behind me. They get drinks and we all hang out while I finish my food.

In the meantime, SexyTeacher has came in and out of the bar area a couple of times to bring empty glasses and get drinks.

When we're ready to leave, I go over to the restaurant side of the place real quick and ask SexyTeacher if she thinks her and the birthday party crew will make it back here eventually. She says they probably will finish off the night here, and so I tell her I'll probably see her later then. She says she hopes that we can find each other later, and I say so do I, and say I'll talk to her later.

We leave to go watch their friend play. It's just him, playing acoustic guitar. This bar is a complete shithole too, by the way. The guy actually has a stellar voice, so the music is decent (all things considered). He takes a break now and then and comes and sits with us and buys us all shots. He seems pretty cool, and I'm asking him about his band and whatnot. He says he plays in a death metal band, but they don't really get any gigs so the only way he ever makes any money is playing solo acoustic shows like this.

After a couple hours here, the girls are getting pretty intoxicated. They're laying on the floor of this shit bar on their stomachs watching the guy play music. Oh boy. They have me take pictures of them huddled up on the floor together. Classy.

He plays a Lil Wayne song - My Bitches Love Me - (yes, he actually plays it on an acoustic guitar and raps it) and StrawberryBlonde flips the fuck out.

As she's dancing around acting like an idiot, I get a text message from SexyTeacher:

SexyTeacher: Hey! Where you at??
Me: With these chicks over in ___ville, watching this guy play acoustic guitar haha. You guys going back to _____ in a few?
SexyTeacher: No, I'm coming there.
SexyTeacher: Now :)
Me: Haha cool! What's the matter... ____ and crew too much for you? :p
SexyTeacher: No way haha ___ and ___ and ___ are with me!
Me: Ah! Right on haha. See you in a minute.
SexyTeacher: :)

They show up and I talk to all of them, and introduce StrawberryBlonde to the 4 of them. She knows one of them somehow. They talk for a while, allowing me to shift focus for a minute.

I tell SexyTeacher to come outside and smoke with me. She does, and we talk about what was going on where she was earlier and what all was going on here. I tell her about the girls laying on the floor and she cracks up.

She's drunk and she says, "If you want to kiss me you can" and smiles. I have no idea how girls get buzzed so quickly. I grab her arm and pull her into me and kiss her, then pull back. She's like, "Hey!!!!" and doesn't like me teasing her. I say "Ok, ok...." and grab her and kiss her more passionately this time, and then pull away after a minute and she beams a smile at me.

You know when you realize the next day that you could have laid some girl, and you missed an escalation window or something, or didn't pull her home when you could have, because you were just having too much fun partying, and you're kicking yourself in the ass the next day over it? Yeah... that was pretty much what was going on here. Anyway, I'd be more fortunate than that tonight. Thank you, Lord.


Things Get Interesting

(You can start reading here if you don't care to read all the build-up)

After SexyTeacher and I are done kissing (we're just standing by each other at this point, I think I had my hand on her waist just above her ass) and StrawberryBlonde comes outside and basically jumps on me, wrapping her arms and legs around me. I stumble, trying to stay standing up and we fall to the ground. I was really thinking "Damnit you are messing up my clothes!" but we laugh and get back up and SexyTeacher and StrawberryBlonde kick off a convo, which I'm paying attention to at first, but it's mundane because they're just going through the rigamarole convo that people have when they first meet each other. I lose interest in it and go back inside the bar.

I'm back inside for a few minutes or so and here they come, arm in arm, laughing and loudly carrying on. There's now 8 of us and it's probably about midnight and the guy is about done playing. He lets people request a couple more songs, and one of the people that came with SexyTeacher brings to the table... tequila shots. (God-forsaken tequila shots)...

SexyTeacher yelps, "Oh! Tequila!! Your favorite!!" and points at me and scrunches up her nose and laughs. I look at her and smile and say "I'll live, but your time is coming. What do you hate the most?", and she laughs and says she's going to drink me under the table. I whip out my favorite response to that comment (Thanks, Tucker Max!): "The only way you could drink me under the table is if I'd go there to hide from you" and we both laugh.

We do the shots and decide to leave to go back to the place where we started the night (it's close by where nearly all of us live, but more so because it's open an hour later than anything else around here).

SexyTeacher wants to ride back with us. She and I, and StrawberryBlonde get in the back of a Honda Pilot (I think that's what its called?). We have a 25 minute drive back to this other place. The person driving has the music at a volume where people can barely speak. I'm sitting back right, Sexy Teacher back left, and StrawberryBlonde (being the smallest of the three of us) is sitting bitch between us.

For some reason unknown to me, likely just her being drunk and having fun, StrawberryBlonde takes off her shirt in the back. Everyone in the car is like "Woohoo!!!" (it's me and 4 girls in the car). She soon has her bra off too. Naked titties just bouncing around haha.

SexyTeacher is like "You have nice tits!" and grabs one. I yell over the music "Hell yeah she does!" and grab the other one and the three of us are cracking up laughing. SexyTeacher starts sucking her left titty. (I'm like whoa)

But, fuck it... If it's gonna be that kind of party?

So, of course I start sucking on her right titty. StrawberryBlonde is laughing and holding her tits out with both hands while we lick on them and bite them. It's weird, a threesome should be something you'd pull off when you've been out partying with girls. But, it's like those wheels aren't even really turning in my head. This is just fun. Never occurred to me that it would lead to what eventually would happen.

We get into town and the streetlights light up the inside of the vehicle. StrawberryBlonde is like "OMG we're in town!" and starts putting her bra back on. We pull into the parking lot and she finishes getting clothed again.

We head inside the bar and it's about 2 AM. This bar, which conveniently is about 1000 feet from my house, has a 3 o'clock liquor license. It's moderately busy tonight, compared to other Saturdays I've been in here at closing. StrawberryBlonde and her friends had planned to just crash at my place anyway, since I have adequate sleeping to accomodate a group.

The next 30 minutes or so is a bit of a blur, not much happens other than StrawberryBlonde and SexyTeacher have a flirty rapport, laughing and leaning into each other and hugging. It's my theory that all women have a little lesbian in them, anyway.

The bartender calls last call, and StrawberryBlonde's friends want to go home instead of stayiing at my place. She wants to stay with me, so they ask me if I can take her home in the morning. Of course I say I can. I ask SexyTeacher if she wants to come over and hang out with us for a little bit. (Since I've calmed down a bit now, the titty-sucking in the car combined with the prospect of repeating that and much more is dominating my thoughts now). She does. Good.

SexyTeacher and StrawberryBlonde get in my vehicle with me and we drive the quarter mile to my house and go inside. I have some beers in the fridge and get three out and put them on the counter. StrawberryBlonde grabs my crotch and I spill one of the beers. I'm going to clean it up but she keeps attacking me, and both of the girls are laughing. Hell, I'm laughing.

StrawberryBlonde asks me if I'm going to fuck her in front of SexyTeacher. I say that SexyTeacher and I are going to suck on her tits again, and she says it sounds hot. I pull her shirt up over her head and she falls into me, hugging me. We're both laughing, SexyTeacher is laughing, and pulls StrawberryBlonde's bra off.

I reach for the button on StrawberryBlonde's pants and undo it. SexyTeacher has her arms around StrawberryBlonde's waist. (We're still in the kitchen standing by the counter)

Then, like magic, StrawberryBlonde spins around and they french kiss.

I'll be really honest, at this point I had no fucking clue what to do. I just sort of stood there and put one hand on SexyTeacher's back and the other on StrawberryBlonde's back. Then, by pure caveman animal instinct, I just took them both by the hand and walked toward my bedroom.

I threw them both down on the bed. From here, it gets graphic. While I could write another six pages about what happens next, I'll just leave it to your imagination.

The aftermath was basically that we laid in my bed, the three of us, smoking cigarettes and laughing. We slept for a couple hours, and then I took both of them home. The vibe after we'd slept off a bit of the alcohol and came to senses was kind of what you'd expect. I had this feeling like they thought to themselves: "Oh, we really did that..." and I just had this feeling like: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!".

I guess I should've taken time before passing out to try and plant a seed for another similar encounter. My mind just wasn't in the right place. Since it took me a couple days off-and-on to get this written, I have the liberty of knowing at the time that I'm writing this that neither of them have any sort of awkward feeling about me. I've been in contact with both of them. So, honestly, the major thing I ended up unhappy about was that I had drank too much to provide a money shot. That would've been pretty badass to see what they could have done with it... =)

Hope this was a fun read. I'm gonna go dream about SexyTeacher and StrawberryBlonde together and beat off haha.

NJ
 

Vash

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Feb 12, 2013
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You're one lucky sonuvabitch, I'll tell you that NarrowJ. Flawless. Sorry man, I gotta play the song.

NarrowJ said:
It's my theory that all women have a little lesbian in them, anyway.

Literally thought the exact same thing most of my life.

Gonna be heading out tonight in a bit, so sorry I can't give more feedback, but....damn. :p
 

Richard

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NJ -

Remember a while ago I said that reading your reports makes me wanna get back into the swing of things?

Well - I've got a report about a threesome I had with my girlfriend and her best friend (actually last night ;)) coming out soon so I hope you enjoy that read as much as I enjoyed this one =P

-Richard
 

NarrowJ

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Zphix said:
NJ -

Remember a while ago I said that reading your reports makes me wanna get back into the swing of things?

Well - I've got a report about a threesome I had with my girlfriend and her best friend (actually last night ;)) coming out soon so I hope you enjoy that read as much as I enjoyed this one =P

-Richard

Haha the stars really did align! We must have channeled each other's energy. :p

NJ
 

Marty

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NJ, I always read your stuff because it's (a) highly entertaining and (b) highly educational.

However, in this case, curiosity was the major motivator... what the hell is a LR++, I wondered!?!

You have satisfied my curiosity on that score, leaving very little to the imagination. Points where I laughed out loud:

NarrowJ said:
So, Saturday night, I finally lived the dream. I can now die a happy man.
NarrowJ said:
They have me take pictures of them huddled up on the floor together. Classy.
NarrowJ said:
SexyTeacher starts sucking her left titty. (I'm like whoa)
NarrowJ said:
It's my theory that all women have a little lesbian in them, anyway.
NarrowJ said:
I'm going to clean it up but she keeps attacking me, and both of the girls are laughing. Hell, I'm laughing.
NarrowJ said:
Then, by pure caveman animal instinct, I just took them both by the hand and walked toward my bedroom.
It just gets better and better, NJ!

-Marty
 

Franco

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...Bravo, my friend! This one is on EVERY man's bucket list, but only the elite few who put in the required work actually get to check it off. ;)

- Franco
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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NJ,

I have to admit, I probably like the graphics to be out, but i think it might be awkward. HAHA!

Zac
 

Hector Papi Castillo

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I threw them both down on the bed. From here, it gets graphic. While I could write another six pages about what happens next, I'll just leave it to your imagination.

Fuck you, man.
 

Mr. oblivious

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Lovely report well done on the threesome

i recommend everyone reading the pre text before it gets 'hot' because that's where i got the most valuable information from
 

NarrowJ

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Crap! I linked the wrong report in the first paragraph there. I was actually referring to this one...

Oh, and thanks guys :)


NJ
 

Verisimilitude

Cro-Magnon Man
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NarrowJ said:
The aftermath was basically that we laid in my bed, the three of us, smoking cigarettes and laughing. We slept for a couple hours, and then I took both of them home. The vibe after we'd slept off a bit of the alcohol and came to senses was kind of what you'd expect. I had this feeling like they thought to themselves: "Oh, we really did that..." and I just had this feeling like: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!".
NJ

Hahaha the aftermath just reminded me so much of this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWw6MAam3DQ. "I'll set up a group text so we can coordinate for next time"

Great fucking job NJ
 

Whizzy

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Way to go NJ, love the caveman instinct that came along naturally!!
 

Casanovelis

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You are an artist and this is your masterpiece.


Now im gonna agree with Anatman though on the details..
 
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