New guy here

mbbx5va2

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
May 13, 2019
Messages
6
Hi all,


I'm here after many many many struggles with women. I'm a good looking guy with lots of great things going for me however I was abused when I was younger and so missed out on gaining experience with women when younger. I'm 32 and single.

I have never been able to get a girl over to my place for sex ever! I'm not a virgin but its got to the point where I am really am desperate to sort this area out. The positives I've spent thousands on therapy to work through my issues, have a support group and have cold approached women and gone on dates. I'll be reading the articles on here.

I struggle to enter into a relationship with women I'm attracted to. I've managed to get into a relationship with a girl I didn't feel that attracted to and we didn't have sex. Perhaps to make it easier I should focus on getting with old women and ones that are ugly to at least gain some experience.

I need some help or coaching or something.

Thanks
 

zeroman2

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Sep 11, 2018
Messages
99
Hi

First I'm sorry for everything that has happen to you

Second you unraveled a lot in this short post so let see if I can' help. You have to learn to be happy or at least content with life because using girls to make you happy will only make you come offs as needy which is a turn off. Next you need to raise your standers with girlfriends never settle for sub-par girlfriends. Me I would rather be alone than settle for anything that's below my standards and that the attitude you should have. Finally when it come's to the old women and ugly chicks you have sex with them BECAUSE YOU WANT TO!!! Not because you need to have "experience". Yes it does help however if your not enjoying it than don't do it. When it comes to pick up and getting laid its all about fun. So if having sex with old women and ugly chicks is not fun for you than don't do it.

Last advice you have to learn real quick the picking up women is a skill. Just like learning piano or a different language its a skill that going to take time to develop. Their are loads (i mean loads) of articles about every subject on pick up. From how to approach, to what to say, and how to get hot girls. I suggest you star off with "How to get girls: the last post your ever need." Next you can find out your sticking points (what specifically are you failing at with girls). If all else fails you can make post and ask other people like me on how you can improve.

I hope this helps
 

Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jul 24, 2015
Messages
2,092
Seriously...

Start with befriending people. Develop a social circle. Get to know people first as acquaintances, then find points of commonality and deepen the connections with those people. Along the way you find what YOUR value in a relationship is. Could be a skill or knowledge you possess. The people will tell you. Learn to be empathetic, learn to seed a conversation. Learn how people respond to your kindness and strength. This is the base of all skills with women.

I've never met someone with poor social skills who did well with women. Once you can read people's emotions, it is easier to escalate with women.
 

mbbx5va2

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
May 13, 2019
Messages
6
Thanks guys

All seems sound advice. Social skills, mindset and humour I'm finding are key the rest doesn't matter so much I realise. I am in good shape, good job, handsome, well dressed, groomed - this doesnt matter The mindset I feel is toughest given my history. Humour - I can put myself through a stand up course. For social skills I'm doing meet up socials, meeting with friends, family, doing speed dating, going on dates, support groups so am slowly getting social again - please note I have recovered from serious illness with little or no socialising / dating for 12 months so it has been like I'm starting again in a way. Although I've been up and running for about 13 months.

I've got to the point where I've written a doc on dating/women attraction etc to make process simpler and easier. As I keep making some mistakes particularly around dealing with female indecision. I need to see where I'm going wrong. I'll start looking at the articles and as for social circles I have a couple of ideas in mind!
 
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