Handling girl with BF who lives very far away



Handling girl with BF who lives very far away

Postby MDtexas » Fri May 03, 2019 5:14 pm

Hey fellas. Need some advice/opinions.

New to this forum. Very familiar with this website though.

I have this dilemma. I am a fairly good looking guy, former NCAA athlete, currently in residency training to be a doctor. I am 31 years old . I have gotten some hot girls in the past (my last GF was hot, my last hookup was hot). I have pretty high standards (known by my close friends) which is why I have been on this cold streak for awhile, plus being super busy with doctor training. I just can't seem to crack this one girl in my residency program who I really really want...

She has been flirting with me since day 1 at orientation. She also does seem to flirt with other guys as well (even the not so cool ones) because she can and likes the attention (she's Latina, as in culturally, born from outside the USA). At the beginning of the year, I asked her out for drinks. She accepted. We had a good time, she came over, but nothing happened. She's pretty conservative. I learned that night that she is 29 years old, from a South American country, and has only had 2 sexual partners her whole life, including her current boyfriend of 3 years. Her boyfriend lives on the other side of USA from where we currently are. They will be apart for at least the next 3 years due to her being in residency training (he is also in residency training, but they could not "couples match").

My gut tells me she likes me. The second time we hung out, she invited me for to her place for dinner (she cooked). I thought that was my time to make my move. I did, and she said that she has a BF and that "it was too fast." That was about 8 months ago. Ever since then, her bf has come to visit like every 2 months or so, and she will go there every so often (not like every weekend, but like once every few months). During the past 8 months, she has continued to flirt with me. She has called me sexy, made sexual comments via phone/text, calls me by "my (my name)", etc. We have met up a couple times since the beginning of the year, but have not been physical yet. One night, after getting food/drinks (we were supposed to study together, never happened, purely social), she told me her BF was mad that she was going out with me. She followed up with "we are friends, right?" in a very sly manner. I basically responded that I don't really like to have friends who are girls, and only talk to girls I am interested in. I called her out on her flirting with me, and she denied it saying that she has never flirted with me (she has, it's totally obvious). She said if that's flirting she does it with everyone (probably true, but I still think its more overt with me). She claimed that she's just friendly because of her South American upbringing....

Now when we text/phone each other, she will randomly throw in "FYI not flirting." She wants to continue hanging out with me even though she knows my intentions with her.
I repeat, I really want this girl and still think I can get her if I continue to make her feel more comfortable around me given how conservative she is. I tend to move fast early with girls, like Chase says to do, however it will not work with this type of chick. I am essentially trying to get her away from her BF. I feel like I can get her given the physical distance between her and her BF, the fact that they will be apart for years, her continued interest in talking to me/flirting and the fact she she has mentioned problems in their relationship to me, more than once.
Advice on how to escalate things with her? Or just call it quits. However, I'm not a quitter when it comes to these types of things.
THANKS
MDtexas


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Re: Handling girl with BF who lives very far away

Postby Skajer » Wed May 29, 2019 4:29 pm

I was interested to learn advice too
Skajer


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Re: Handling girl with BF who lives very far away

Postby Fuck This » Thu May 30, 2019 5:18 pm

MDtexas wrote:Hey fellas. Need some advice/opinions.
.

I have this dilemma. I am a fairly good looking guy, former NCAA athlete, currently in residency training to be a doctor. I am 31 years old . I have gotten some hot girls in the past (my last GF was hot, my last hookup was hot). I have pretty high standards (known by my close friends) which is why I have been on this cold streak for awhile, plus being super busy with doctor training. I just can't seem to crack this one girl in my residency program who I really really want...


Advice on how to escalate things with her? Or just call it quits. However, I'm not a quitter when it comes to these types of things.
THANKS


The bolded part above = Working with her, Thus......don't date or fuck her.

You aren't quitting...you are making a decision that will improve your life in the short term.

By obsessing over this one girl you are short circuiting all other opportunities that would have the desired outcome. If you had 10 girls who you could call for sex right now, or upgrade to a relationship, you would not mess with this ONE chick.

Even if she broke up with this BF you are gonna be a rebound or have to deal with her mourning the relationship for a couple months. Not worth it....

Don't confuse competitive nature with commitment to a goal.
Fuck This


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