Seeing a Girl with a Troubled Past?

J

Jack123Frost

Guest
Hey fellas,

So I have been sleeping with this new girl for about a month. She's pretty normal, cute, nice, and never gave me any red flags until a few days ago.

In bed she really likes to be dominated, just as many girls do. But when it comes to blowjobs, she does not want to be called "dirty" or have her hair pulled like the rest of the sex. Once in a while, she'll pull back and have to catch her breath. For a while, I thought it was because she would activate her gag reflex, but she never seemed to gag or anything. I thought it might be some kind of emotional reaction.

Then a few nights ago, we went to her room like usual and turned on some music. First, she asked me not to go rough like she usually likes it. But then a few minutes into foreplay she needed to catch her breath, and told me that we weren't having sex that day. For the first time, she confided in me that she had anxiety issues. When I asked a bit more, she said that "some things" had happened to her when she was "really young", and her anxiety acts up once in a while. So we just hung out in her room and talked for a while about random things.

Anyone have any experience with this? On one hand, I am compassionate towards her. She didn't tell me any specifics of the "things" that happened, but I'm guessing it was sexual since its only during sex that she gets what seem like panic attacks. I want to be sympathetic, but at the same time, I'm not sure if I'm ready to date a girl with "issues". I've seen some guys who date girls with anxiety issues, and it seems to complicate relationships and cause hardship. Frankly, I'm not sure if I want her issue to become my issue. It sounds kind of mean spirited. But any advice from people who've experienced this?

Thanks,

-J
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,986
Location
Australia
Yes I have experienced this before I got into seduction and it set a really really bad precedent, it becomes all about her and makes the guy want to go all white-knightey. Fuck that. You are correct that you need a clear separation. Her issues are her issues. If she wants to get treatment or whatnot it is up to her. You are not her therapist. And if (remember IF -- because it could all be a bullshit sympathy ploy) some guy treated her badly in the past, well that guy is not you and it doesn't reflect on you.
cheers, Ray
 
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