LR  Good Girl at the Club

Hue

Tribal Elder
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Sep 21, 2016
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1,453
Background

A couple weeks ago I was out at the club and had an interesting night. At one point I saw this cute indian girl (let's say a lite 7. petite with a naturally pretty face) at the bar with her friends, and she seemed a little different than the rest of them. She didn't look like she was trying to impress, or be cool, or stand out. She just looked like a girl trying to enjoy her night.

I had a shit ton of momentum at this point in the night (free drinks at the bar I was at earlier, 3 different groups of girls had opened me, this super hot girl tried to seduce me but I decided was too drunk, and I got into bottle service for free) so I go up to her. I think I just asked how her night was going. Immediately we have a good vibe and I get introduced to the rest of her group - total party chicks. We dance and have fun; they seemed cool with me.

Next I took her outside to isolate her. Almost right away she kinda looks off and starts opening up about herself to me (something I see happening more and more with girls, they just go straight into investing things beyond surface level with me after a solid approach and hook). We talk for about 15 minutes about our lives, then head back inside to dance. I get her to grind on me and then move that into makeout in the middle of the club. Got her super horny.

After this I start angling to get her out of there, it was about 1:40 at this point and I was drunk so I don't remember a whole lot. She has friends visiting in town so it was a hard sell being persistent to get them away from eachother to have her home and smashable. Her and I get to her apartment before her friends do, and we start hooking up on the bed. BUT her friends were at some after party and it was like 6 times of her calling her friends to make sure they were okay.

Even though they said they were perfectly fine she kept calling, and yet she kept moving this forward with me, too. It was hard to read.

I get her really wet but can't seal the deal, and then her friends start to leave. I'm pretty sure if I stuck around instead of decisively walking out of the situation (some sexual frustration + alcohol + persisting a lot) we would have banged once her friends got to her house. Instead I do a romantic / byronic goodbye about fate and then leave. I gave her my # but my phone was dead.


Texting

She ends up texting me, to my surprise. We text on and off for a few weeks but can't seem to find a date. Then in the on and off texting she texts me yesterday, and by the night time she definitely wants to meet. I don't figure it out with her until about 1:30 when I call her and we meet. This time I'm totally sober, and over text made her aware of it. She actually was into it.

Pull

The friends she with are much cooler and calmer than the original girls she was at the club with. We go to an after hours bar and hang out for a little bit. I immediatley isolated her and ramped touch, then befriended her friends. It think this was a good order to do this in because it set her in a state that she was with me, not with her friends and meeting me. We all get food once the bar closes and I seed the pull to watch this netflix show, Big Mouth, tonight.

I want to bring her home with the excuse that she hasn't seen my apartment yet and I have seen hers. She considers this idea for plausible deniability, but I think that it wasn't "deniable" enough for her friends thinking she was doing something slutty so instead she makes reasons for me to come with them. She says she has a TV in her room, so I stop resisting her leading and we go.

Shit Tests

We turned on Big mouth and didn't watch a second of it. We start laying down together, touching eachother and talking.

I had two shit tests.

First was why I liked her and wanted to hang out with her. I told her "because I saw you at the club with your other friends... but you looked different. you looked like you weren't really a "club girl". then we talked and you made my night better, and I found out you were definitely your own thing". This sold her pretty well. She also asked if I was mad when I left last time. I told her that it was a conflict for me because I go after what I want, but at the same time don't want to do anything if she wasn't cool with it or ready for it, so the second one had to tell the first one to shut up and eventually it did.

Second shit test was bullshit because she had already asked me if I had a condom on me and we were both ass naked lol. It was "and what if I don't want to do anything?" or something and I just smiled, agreed we wouldn't, and then continued escalating.


Conclusion

She was reallly tight. I came hard.


We bang twice and then sleep a bit. I almost banged her this morning but decided I was too tired (unlike me I know but I really was lol going out sober after a double at work is exhausting). Texted her this morning, and will try to make her a FB. I fear that the romantic aspect will make her want an OR or a LTR but I'll just frame and pace to the best of my ability.



Cheers.
 

Chase

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
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Oct 9, 2012
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5,484
Nice report, Hue.

Some comments:

I get her really wet but can't seal the deal, and then her friends start to leave. I'm pretty sure if I stuck around instead of decisively walking out of the situation (some sexual frustration + alcohol + persisting a lot) we would have banged once her friends got to her house. Instead I do a romantic / byronic goodbye about fate and then leave. I gave her my # but my phone was dead.

Good realization.

For similar situations in the future, just tell yourself it's okay to chill out and relax with her in bed and plan to maybe fall asleep if you're close but can't quite get over the hump.

Then just wake up after a few hours of slumber and try again.

Give you both a chance to unwind, and then you can start up again fresh.

A little sleep does a good job of resetting all that inner dialogue you both have going on, her making her resist what she wants, you making you less instinctual and more deliberate/mechanical. Wake up after a nap and you're both a lot purer of thought.

I want to bring her home with the excuse that she hasn't seen my apartment yet and I have seen hers. She considers this idea for plausible deniability, but I think that it wasn't "deniable" enough for her friends thinking she was doing something slutty so instead she makes reasons for me to come with them. She says she has a TV in her room, so I stop resisting her leading and we go.

"You've got to see my apartment" can work fine, you just have to oversell the place.

"I have to show you my apartment... it has this HUGE picture window that looks out over the entire city. And a floor-to-ceiling mirror that makes even just sitting on the couch, next to these trippy mood lights the architect installed, a super fun experience. We'll make a little popcorn and I'll throw on some tunes."

If you sell it to her, she can sell it to her friends: "I'm going to his place, it's this really cool place and he's been promising to show me."

I had two shit tests.

First was why I liked her and wanted to hang out with her. I told her "because I saw you at the club with your other friends... but you looked different. you looked like you weren't really a "club girl". then we talked and you made my night better, and I found out you were definitely your own thing". This sold her pretty well.

Classic Barnum-statement-style framing. Well done, Hue!

You can use that with any girl, and it's going to feel like you peered right into her soul.

Since of course every girl (everybody) thinks she is "not like all the rest."

"You made my night better" is also a great touch -- that'll be true for any girl you get together with, but will feel very nice and very personal to her.

Great stuff.

We bang twice and then sleep a bit. I almost banged her this morning but decided I was too tired (unlike me I know but I really was lol going out sober after a double at work is exhausting).

You probably know, but it doesn't have to be amazing in the morning.

If you mount her and stick it in and thrust for six or seven minutes then blast, she is still going to feel pretty good about that.

Nice way of reassuring her last night was not a fluke and you still desire her the next morning as well.

Anyway. The romance stuff won't necessarily lock you into "serious relationship" territory.

You can certainly continue to be romantic while herding her toward a casual relationship. "Darling, I adore you, but my life is such that I can only promise you so much... I never want to hurt you..."

Chase
 

Hue

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Sep 21, 2016
Messages
1,453
Thanks Chase!

Good realization.

For similar situations in the future, just tell yourself it's okay to chill out and relax with her in bed and plan to maybe fall asleep if you're close but can't quite get over the hump.

Then just wake up after a few hours of slumber and try again.

Give you both a chance to unwind, and then you can start up again fresh.

A little sleep does a good job of resetting all that inner dialogue you both have going on, her making her resist what she wants, you making you less instinctual and more deliberate/mechanical. Wake up after a nap and you're both a lot purer of thought.

Right, it's pretty silly to get worked up about it.

In the moment I suppose my worry with staying the night without sex sets the frame that I'm cool with doing that. What do you think?

Treating it like a nap, however, could work around this. That way it's less "staying the night" and more just hitting the reset button.
Classic Barnum-statement-style framing. Well done, Hue!

You can use that with any girl, and it's going to feel like you peered right into her soul.

Since of course every girl (everybody) thinks she is "not like all the rest."

"You made my night better" is also a great touch -- that'll be true for any girl you get together with, but will feel very nice and very personal to her.

Great stuff.
Is that what it's called? I'm but a mere hopeless romantic, good sir. ;)

You can certainly continue to be romantic while herding her toward a casual relationship. "Darling, I adore you, but my life is such that I can only promise you so much... I never want to hurt you..."
Great point. You can still have concrete frames set while being romantic and emotionally satisfying :)

So what ended up happening was kind of unfortunate. I recently found out I had a very harmless oral STD, but hadn't spread it to anyone despite giving oral frequently. I checked with my immediate partners and through detective work concluded it had to be this Good Girl. She, among others get tested, and no one had anything!

At an after party at my house she sits me down to "talk" and tells me that even though neither of us have it after I had it fixed, and even though "she's cool with me seeing other girls", it's not a safe choice for her continuing to see me because I'm not picky enough with taking new lovers. I did my best to talk around this and escalate that night but couldn't seal the deal. Though my gut instinct says she'll be back in the next coming weeks/months.



Thanks for the feedback, big guy.

Hue
 

Chase

Chieftan
Staff member
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Hue,

In the moment I suppose my worry with staying the night without sex sets the frame that I'm cool with doing that. What do you think?

All in the framing.

If you've framed it such that you "have to" lay her in order to not look weak, then yes, that's bad to do.

But if you framed it as you really liked her, and escalated on her because you really liked her, but if she's being difficult, oh well, you're tired, taking a nap... then the whole time it is just "Hue doing what he wants to do."

"I want to kiss on you and touch you and play with your body" --> "Oh you don't want to shag? Okay, well now I want to nap" --> LATER, THAT VERY SAME EVENING... --> "Mmm, just woke up and have this rock-hard boner poking into this girl's panties-clad bottom. I want to get all up on that again"

And if she still won't put out, rinse and repeat. Escalate on her for a bit, get another article of clothing or two off, chuck them across the room so she can't put them back on, fall asleep for another nap. Wake up an hour later with another boner, do it again, get her more naked. Etc.

Nights like this can actually be loads of fun if you break for a nap before you reach the point where you're turned it into a tug-of-war.

You really don't want it being a tug-of-war. You should enjoy kissing her and touching her and whatnot until it isn't fun anymore. Then break. Then do it when it's fun again. Eventually she is going to get so worked up the fun will quite naturally need to your penis in her.

So what ended up happening was kind of unfortunate. I recently found out I had a very harmless oral STD, but hadn't spread it to anyone despite giving oral frequently. I checked with my immediate partners and through detective work concluded it had to be this Good Girl. She, among others get tested, and no one had anything!

At an after party at my house she sits me down to "talk" and tells me that even though neither of us have it after I had it fixed, and even though "she's cool with me seeing other girls", it's not a safe choice for her continuing to see me because I'm not picky enough with taking new lovers. I did my best to talk around this and escalate that night but couldn't seal the deal. Though my gut instinct says she'll be back in the next coming weeks/months.

Sounds like you handled that as well as possible.

Eh, STDs suck. And telling people bad/awkward news sucks.

Well, now you're the dirty nasty bad boy in her life. She'll probably be back ;)

Chase
 
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