Hey guys,
Had another Hinge first date tonight. I was pretty excited because she was cute and we went to the same undergrad (but didnt know each other).
I was trying to work on my deep diving during this date--something that I did well--as well as just being relaxed and letting things happen.
Turns out I didnt get the lay because I dont think I set the premise of us having sex later. She was very funny and was cracking jokes the entire time.
I wouldve been fine with this type of date, but when it came time for the pull she just kept on cracking jokes. It may have had something to do with her level of maturity (she was 22).
The Date
I met her at a wine bar near her apartment (turns out she lives with her parents....). I got there early because I wanted to get a good seat, and i like to be social with people before the date.
I feel like this gives me a head start on the date, and helps me pick out the best location without her there.
The place is very intimate, yet casual at the same time. Its perfect, so Im excited
She gets there and actually looks a little disheveled (i thought because it was raining, but now i know thats just her personality).
Our pre-date texting was more extensive than I usually do becuase she was funny and we were both having a good time.
In person she was very animated, never serious, but intelligent at the same time. It was like a mix between flirty, nerdy, and immature.
I feel like she would be the type of person who would make jokes during sex.... Anyways she was cute so I didnt care.
I did some deep diving and she opened right up. However, she couldnt stay serious. She was investing a lot in me by screening me, asking me questions about my school, and touching me (saying i was muscular).
Side note: ive been on a tough workout and dieting schedule recently so i was pretty tired tonight from a big lift earlier.
We each got a glass of wine and she got super chatty. I swear my total word count was like 1% of hers. I know mine is supposed to be less, but she was really doing 99% of the talking.
I did my same flirty eye contact, sexy pauses, and such, but she would counter my sexy moves with more humor.
I couldnt tell if this humor was her dodging it due to discomfort or her thinking "i see you BigS, we're gonna get down to business later, i just wanna have some fun with you now."
I felt like it was the latter so I stayed engaged and hopeful.
About an hour into the date we had finished our drinks, so i say we should get the check. She agrees and we leave.
Outside I say:
There was a short pause, and a little of my hope dwindled. Nothing worse than hearing "so how are you getting home?" towards the end of the date.
At this point my hope was pretty low, but we were still walking towards her family's apartment. Heck, i wouldnt mind fucking with her parents home... or maybe they werent home.... idk.
We get to her street and she says:
We get to her building:
We hugged (ugh) and i went home.....
Analysis: NEED HELP!
So i dont have a lot of experience with this type of girl, so im not surprised that i didnt get the lay.
She was very jokey, not in a goofy way (it was socially calibrated), but it was excessive as if she was an aspiring comedian.
She was also several years younger than me and lived with her parents so i was wondering if there was a component of immaturity/lack of experience.
However, she was extroverted and was in a sorority, so i bet she's fucked a few dudes.
My game at this point is very subtle (mostly nonverbal), and i didnt make any grand gestures of dominance or escalation.
I just rode the steady wave of escalation as the conversation wore on.
However, maybe what I was missing was something to kick it up to that next level of escalation.
There were plenty of sexy pauses and prolonged eye contact, so im thinking the humor is just her way of making herself more excited/horny.
I am missing a general approach for this type of girl. I do not understand the psychology behing girls being excessively jokey/corny in the face of sexuality.
What is going on here???????
Cheers,
BigS
Had another Hinge first date tonight. I was pretty excited because she was cute and we went to the same undergrad (but didnt know each other).
I was trying to work on my deep diving during this date--something that I did well--as well as just being relaxed and letting things happen.
Turns out I didnt get the lay because I dont think I set the premise of us having sex later. She was very funny and was cracking jokes the entire time.
I wouldve been fine with this type of date, but when it came time for the pull she just kept on cracking jokes. It may have had something to do with her level of maturity (she was 22).
The Date
I met her at a wine bar near her apartment (turns out she lives with her parents....). I got there early because I wanted to get a good seat, and i like to be social with people before the date.
I feel like this gives me a head start on the date, and helps me pick out the best location without her there.
The place is very intimate, yet casual at the same time. Its perfect, so Im excited
She gets there and actually looks a little disheveled (i thought because it was raining, but now i know thats just her personality).
Our pre-date texting was more extensive than I usually do becuase she was funny and we were both having a good time.
In person she was very animated, never serious, but intelligent at the same time. It was like a mix between flirty, nerdy, and immature.
I feel like she would be the type of person who would make jokes during sex.... Anyways she was cute so I didnt care.
I did some deep diving and she opened right up. However, she couldnt stay serious. She was investing a lot in me by screening me, asking me questions about my school, and touching me (saying i was muscular).
Side note: ive been on a tough workout and dieting schedule recently so i was pretty tired tonight from a big lift earlier.
We each got a glass of wine and she got super chatty. I swear my total word count was like 1% of hers. I know mine is supposed to be less, but she was really doing 99% of the talking.
I did my same flirty eye contact, sexy pauses, and such, but she would counter my sexy moves with more humor.
I couldnt tell if this humor was her dodging it due to discomfort or her thinking "i see you BigS, we're gonna get down to business later, i just wanna have some fun with you now."
I felt like it was the latter so I stayed engaged and hopeful.
About an hour into the date we had finished our drinks, so i say we should get the check. She agrees and we leave.
Outside I say:
There was a short pause, and a little of my hope dwindled. Nothing worse than hearing "so how are you getting home?" towards the end of the date.
At this point my hope was pretty low, but we were still walking towards her family's apartment. Heck, i wouldnt mind fucking with her parents home... or maybe they werent home.... idk.
We get to her street and she says:
We get to her building:
Her: you can come up but idk if you want to meet my family, haha.
Me: yeah....
Her: i had fun though; id be down to come up to [my neighborhood] next time
Me: cool
We hugged (ugh) and i went home.....
Analysis: NEED HELP!
So i dont have a lot of experience with this type of girl, so im not surprised that i didnt get the lay.
She was very jokey, not in a goofy way (it was socially calibrated), but it was excessive as if she was an aspiring comedian.
She was also several years younger than me and lived with her parents so i was wondering if there was a component of immaturity/lack of experience.
However, she was extroverted and was in a sorority, so i bet she's fucked a few dudes.
My game at this point is very subtle (mostly nonverbal), and i didnt make any grand gestures of dominance or escalation.
I just rode the steady wave of escalation as the conversation wore on.
However, maybe what I was missing was something to kick it up to that next level of escalation.
There were plenty of sexy pauses and prolonged eye contact, so im thinking the humor is just her way of making herself more excited/horny.
I am missing a general approach for this type of girl. I do not understand the psychology behing girls being excessively jokey/corny in the face of sexuality.
What is going on here???????
Cheers,
BigS