Okay this may be a long post but i had to get all you guy's experiences on this because this thing has been bugging me for almost a month and i have no proper person around me who can give me the kind of advice i need.
I have these friends around me who know me since childhood but only recently have become close to me. The friendship was very good for the first two years with no setbacks but recently a plethora of issues have arisen that have totally shaken me and are starting to affect me.
A few of my friends are racists, they are unemployed, they gossip about others, the worst trait is that they are Woman Hating (All these things were depicted to me as if they were absolute truths)These are very poisonous thoughts for me to listen to as I am now. i was told that MOST women lie, cheat, take undue advantage of their gender. That I will not be successful in a relationship with a woman . My wife will run away/sleep with another man. I will have a poor sex life/first time will be not so great and many more, they have started becoming controlling, they are forcing their negative beliefs on me, they themselves lack action, make excuses and blame others.
My core belief is to treat my gf as an equal and give her respect and freedom in life. They told me that that was bullshit and respecting her on that level will make her take advantage of the situation. Thats just one of their comments. They are not selfish but these issues listed above are now beginning to affect me and are making me have doubts. They are moral policing me to the extreme level saying that since i live in India i should be thinking like an Indian and not like an American. That this belief system of mine will cause me problems.
They said they will make me 'normal' and proceed to feed me with shit about how certain beliefs of mine will not work out. When i told them that they're being very negative in life, they correct me by telling me i always look on the bright side alone and I am a one-sided thinker. Now, i dont think one-sidedly, i know the bad things, its just that i don't believe in thinking about those until they arise. I totally ignored them at first but now taunting me has become kind of a sport among them.
I am pursuing a professional degree which is about halfway complete btw. I want to inculcate all the values taught on this site and i have, but now their constant comments are making me question/doubt myself and i do not like it at all. Its making me think that somewhere i may be wrong about everything and they will be right. I admit i am slightly argumentative by nature and I have kept secrets which they did not like but its just that i dont like talking about certain things to everyone as i am not comfortable with it.
Other than that, they have been pretty good people uptil recently....My question is what should i do about all this now? Am i one-sided? Am i thinking wrongly? Am i being stupid about the situation and are they right about everything? Should i drop them and continue toward my goal? Will leaving them be the right thing to do? There is much more to this but i cannot explain those parts very well.....i need advice since this situation has had me doubting alot......
I have these friends around me who know me since childhood but only recently have become close to me. The friendship was very good for the first two years with no setbacks but recently a plethora of issues have arisen that have totally shaken me and are starting to affect me.
A few of my friends are racists, they are unemployed, they gossip about others, the worst trait is that they are Woman Hating (All these things were depicted to me as if they were absolute truths)These are very poisonous thoughts for me to listen to as I am now. i was told that MOST women lie, cheat, take undue advantage of their gender. That I will not be successful in a relationship with a woman . My wife will run away/sleep with another man. I will have a poor sex life/first time will be not so great and many more, they have started becoming controlling, they are forcing their negative beliefs on me, they themselves lack action, make excuses and blame others.
My core belief is to treat my gf as an equal and give her respect and freedom in life. They told me that that was bullshit and respecting her on that level will make her take advantage of the situation. Thats just one of their comments. They are not selfish but these issues listed above are now beginning to affect me and are making me have doubts. They are moral policing me to the extreme level saying that since i live in India i should be thinking like an Indian and not like an American. That this belief system of mine will cause me problems.
They said they will make me 'normal' and proceed to feed me with shit about how certain beliefs of mine will not work out. When i told them that they're being very negative in life, they correct me by telling me i always look on the bright side alone and I am a one-sided thinker. Now, i dont think one-sidedly, i know the bad things, its just that i don't believe in thinking about those until they arise. I totally ignored them at first but now taunting me has become kind of a sport among them.
I am pursuing a professional degree which is about halfway complete btw. I want to inculcate all the values taught on this site and i have, but now their constant comments are making me question/doubt myself and i do not like it at all. Its making me think that somewhere i may be wrong about everything and they will be right. I admit i am slightly argumentative by nature and I have kept secrets which they did not like but its just that i dont like talking about certain things to everyone as i am not comfortable with it.
Other than that, they have been pretty good people uptil recently....My question is what should i do about all this now? Am i one-sided? Am i thinking wrongly? Am i being stupid about the situation and are they right about everything? Should i drop them and continue toward my goal? Will leaving them be the right thing to do? There is much more to this but i cannot explain those parts very well.....i need advice since this situation has had me doubting alot......