How to handle a girl after she comes back from auto rejection

So I’ve been dating a girl in my social circle of friends. We have known each other for 2 years know through mutual friends. Around November 2018. We were supposed to meet up with some friends at a bar. I took her there and they canceled. Me and her were always cool I kinda treated her like a little cousin before. But that night we were by ourselves for the first time. So we were drinking beers and she pretty much told me her life story past relationships blah blah blah lol.

We ended up going to another bar that was more quiet a block away. We ended up making out there and then we had had sex in my car and then again at her house when I dropped her off.

We kept our relationship a secret from our friends but I knew she told my best friends girlfriend. Since that girl started making comments afterward a few weeks later. So a month and half ago. It got weird. She asked me for a break for no reason. Which I was cool about and said ok. A week later she texted.

Her: it shouldn’t feel like we’re mad

Me: not at all how are u

Her: I’m good just checking. Since u haven’t texted me

Me: I’m surprise you think that since you wanted a break.

Her: well we can still be friends

Me: well I see you as more than a friend and I really don’t have girls as friends

Her: what do you mean. Like friends with benefits

Me: no

Her: I don’t see us working out if that’s what you mean we’re the opposite.

Me: well I kinda do but it’s cool if you want a break

Her: I see

About a couple weeks pass by and she texted me that we should go get a cake for a friends bday. I was at work and completely forgot to answer her text. A friend of ours told me hey what happened you didn’t reply her to her text I told him I don’t know what you’re talking about.

So I texted her.

Me: hey so and so knows I didn’t text you

Her: I don’t know how he found out but you’re an asshole for not replying your full of shit. You said you saw us working out stop bullshitting me and you’re self.

Me: whatever’s if you believe me or not it’s on you

Her: you told me you don’t want to be friends

Me: so

Her: ok You go you’re way I’ll go mine. It’s going to suck but ok

After a couple weeks of going out with our mutual friends I saw her a few times and we never spoke and she would only give me an angry face and would look up and away from me.

So this is were it becomes interesting. Out of the blue she texted me this Friday.

Her: we need to meet up in person the tension between us is not going unnoticed by everyone.

Me: ok when are you free

Her: tonight or Wednesday

Me: let’s do tonight.

Her: ok let’s meet up at the coffee shop by your house at 7

Me: ok

We meet up I told her you can speak first and say everything you want to say and then I’ll go. She literally told me everything that she was disappointed in me that she sees me differently know why would I ignore her like she wasn’t worth anything to me blah blah and she cried a few times.

When she was done I told her I was never mad or upset at her I let me pride take over since it’s the second time she cussed at me. The first time I ignored her texts for 2 days.

We then spoke a bit she told me everything she went through and that we could never be in a relationship and that she really saw us having a future but after going through that I lost any chance. That we were like water and oil.

I said ok

Then she said she was hungry we went to a little deli that has beer. We started catching up she got warmer towards me so I told her I’ll get another beer and that I’ll get her one for me being a jerk she accepted it. When we were done I kissed her. And she said we can’t go back to the way it was I said ok. I walked her to her car and she still wanted to talk so she said let’s go to your car and talk.

She started giving me advice on my future relationships that communication should be a priority not ignoring someone. Then she asked me if I can give her a back massage which I did then I looked her straight in the eyes and went for another kiss we started making out and she got really turned on and she said I have to pee. I knew she wanted to go to my house but I played it off and said theres a burger place right there and she said can I pee at your house and then I’ll leave I said ok. She got on her car and followed me.

We got to my place she went into the bathroom then I went in I told her to wait in my room since my brother who’s my roommate was with his girl in his room.

When I went to my room she was laying in my bed with her shirt pulled down to show her breast more. She said I forgot how comfy your bed is. I jumped on her and started making out with her and we had sex.

Afterwards we started talking a bit how she still had the only gift I gave her which was a teddy bear and coffee mug I got her a week before valentines. She said she has the mug on her desk at work but then she said she wasn’t expecting to have sex with me and we can’t continue seeing each other I said ok. She then looked at me in the eyes and said you don’t believe me we can’t be in a relationship. I said I wasn’t looking for a relationship then she wanted to snuggle for a few minutes then we both got ready again and I walked her to her car. I gave her a hug and a kiss.

So I don’t know how to handle this I know we’re going to see each other but I think she wants to continue seeing me after she got over of auto rejecting me. This is were I need advice it’s the first time I get a girl back from auto rejection and I don’t want to mess it up

Rico dude! From ya post a don't think she went into auto rejection here. If this was auto rejection it was cause she couldn't get ya to commit an when ya social circle becomes aware of it her reputation is ruined if ya not official. Her then asking for a break was to save her reputation while she slowed down everything an start playing games to get ya to chase. Well done on not playing dude! Shit test passed

Now she came back cause she's decided ya passed the test, an ya what she wants. A friends with benefits relationship would have possibly been better for ya to push for rather than saying ya wanted to be an item. This under played ya hand! This says ya chasing an ya willing to commit even though she told ya she can't do relationships?!?

Not texting her back was the best accident ya made here, it saved ya looking needy and desperate an made her reach out to the social circle for support. She then looked mad after telling ya to go separate ways cause ya not chasing which is what she's expecting from ya cause ya told her ya want a relationship. This puts the power back to ya cause ya not playing. Blowing hot an cold which is confusing her..

She wanted to meet cause she was chasing. Her crying was a shit test that ya failed for apologising an blaming ya pride. Ignoring her then won ya frame back because she is chasing!!

There's a lot of back an forth that am gonna overlook because it's the same shit. Top an bottom dude ignore her bull shit, escalate when ya can an this is in the bag. Be warm in person an reward her behaviour when she reaches out to ya. Ya will keep as friends with benefits easily with this an she will suggest the relationship going forward. Keep discrete with ya circle to help maintain ya relationship

Hope this helps dude!

Also read up on sexual tension an breaking sexual tension. This will be a huge help here!!

I think you have this set up well to become a Fuck buddy type of thing...You have laid her 2x and she doesn't want a relationship. This is a rare thing... take it as far as you can...

Fluxcapacitator,

Dude you’re right she wanted me to commit. I didn’t think of it that way. Well we all mess up but I’ll push for friends with benefits which is what we had


Fuck this,

I’ve been dating her since November it’s just that I didn’t notice she was pushing me to become official

Rico said:

Fluxcapacitator,

Dude you’re right she wanted me to commit. I didn’t think of it that way. Well we all mess up but I’ll push for friends with benefits which is what we had


Fuck this,

I’ve been dating her since November it’s just that I didn’t notice she was pushing me to become official

Click to expand...

Be clear in your intent.. https://blackdragonblog.com/2013/05/19/ ... and-mtlrs/

Fluxcapacitator and fuck this,

Thanks for the advice on those links. I’m currently adopting Chase and Hectors approach of not having FWB and making long term lovers.

Which is why I was confused by her reaction I was never leading her before would only text to meet up