Girls on tinder not serious about hooking up

killerman

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 8, 2014
Messages
452
There's this thing that's really annoying me these days and it's girls on tinder talking the talk but never walking the walk when it comes to hooking up, skipping the date process and them coming over straignt to my place. Things are following a very consistent pattern where I've recently uploaded a hot bathroom selfie of me and my topless body showing my muscles. I've also got other "normal" photos but the hot muscles selfie one is the main pic. I'm getting more super likes than ever before. I match with the girl that super liked me. Girl ALWAYS has "looking for fun" or "no strings attached hot fun" in her tinder bio. Instantly I open her by saying " hey xxx, so when are you free to meet up for our evening of hot, intense passion?". They ALWAYS say "you're hot as fuck btw" or "omg that body, you're so hot", everytime they compliment me on my appearance and physique. Then she starts a conversation about sex, asks me what i'm going to do to her etc and the questions never end. After a while I give her short answers everytime but then instead of saying "cool, see you next saturday" there's always another question! Then she says how she's down for it. However it''s ALWAYS in a week's time, never that same evening or tomorrow evening. And even when we set up the date the questions still keep coming asking what my fantasies are, whether I'm into bdsm, shower sex, sex positions etc. Then every time she ends up flaking and unmatching on the day of meet, sometimes even an hour before when she says she's just on her way. This is starting to get very annoying. When a girl that i meet on the street flakes i dont mind so much because we only exchanged a few texts of rapport and to set up the date but this has just got to the point where i literally cant be bothered anymore...to endlessly message her and then never meet up. So 2 questions...why is she doing this? do some girls just find it fun to match with hot guys on tinder who are DTF then play him around for days by endlessly messaging about what we're going to do to each other , play and fuck them around then unmatch them? Is it just a game for them and they were never serious to begin with? And second question what do i do from here? Do i cut it short by saying something like "got to run now, got to an audition in an hour, i'll see you next sat" or "so many questions! i want to meet you and have sex with you, not be your messaging buddy"?
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Very simple: this approach will shoot her level of ASD well above the roof.

You may succeed, sometimes, with the most DTF of them, but at the same time you will lose plenty of girls who would otherwise have been OK with casual sex - provided that you managed her ASD correctly.

That shows, again, that you should never take what she says, or write on her bio, at face value. She says she's "looking for fun"? Or she says she's "down for it"? Just ignore. Same holds when she says "not into hookups". Just ignore what she says. You still have to manage her self image as a Good Girl.

Instead, set up a date - within the next 48 hours, not more - in a coffee shop near your home. Have an hour of face time. Then take her home on any pretext. Your success rate will increase a lot.
 

killerman

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 8, 2014
Messages
452
Yeah that's what i used to do, and it worked. However recently i've been thinking of skipping all that stuff and going straight for sex from the get go. Got 2 more dates set up where they're supposed to come to my place next weekend. Will give it one last try. If they both flake i'm going back to what you suggest. We'll see what happens.
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Hey in my experience it can work - sometimes - if she's really DTF. When it works, it's great, she comes straight to your home and bed. But you just lose a lot of girls in the process. It's a choice.

Same with sexting by the way.

I experimented a little bit along these lines, then returned to the good old.

Well, let us know if you get any luck.

Seppuku
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Nov 20, 2012
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6,553
Hello,

Got a lot of matches on other dating site. Two lessons.

1)Looks
2)Arbitarage.

Chase recommend arbitrage many years back. Infact, it applies everywhere, like business. :) This does not only apply offline. If you get matches but no meetup, your messages is the first problem. The second is go back to your photos.

Zac
 

Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Jul 24, 2015
Messages
2,092
The investment level of women on Tinder is so low, that I think any meetup less than 48 hours after the initial convo is doomed to flake unless you can keep them warm with phone or video every 24 hrs until the meetup.

Limited experience myself but I've had women meet me out in public within 45 minutes for a drink. Got a second date and ended it there.

met another 7 hours after she messaged me back. Sex that night...

Always be closing.....
 

mindful

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Mar 16, 2014
Messages
256
I agree with seppuku. Just because a girl has just for fun or casual that doesn’t give you the green light to immediately get sexual and think she’s just gonna come over and ride your cock. Just talk to her normally, and schedule the date ASAP.

Think of all the guys who fall into that trap of “hey you wanna come over tonight”. Such low effort and a girl is gonna almost always roll her eyes and not respond unless she is super horny and DTF... and even if she is... just grab a drink with her then bring her home.
 

jakesykes949

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Mar 5, 2019
Messages
54
No shit, dude. This is basic Game 101. Women are emotional. You need to learn to "ease" them into it. Start by making small talk, get their Snapchat or number quickly, wait a day or two, text on and off, and then call them and set up a time and place.

Obviously you're going to get female attention if you're physically good looking, but closing requires finesse and experience. Stay the course, brother.

I know it can be frustrating (I also do the same in my Tinder profile), but trust me... just be a little bit more savvy to their "buyer's experience" (to put it in sales terms) and you'll do just fine.
 

fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
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Jul 20, 2015
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peru
sep presents an interesting point with the ASD.

the person asking the questions in any given interaction is the one doing the screening. you said the girls are asking you a bunch of questions. it sounds like they are screening for sexual compatibility. the more you reveal, the more they realize....this guy might not be what im looking for.

by talking about sex so much, youre blowing all the tension in the conversation, and reducing the mystery of it all. by the time it comes to meet up, theyve already figured you out.

youre also likely overproviding good feelings, which as chase mentioned here is not a good thing.

try this out:

1. be the person asking the questions
2. establish only a tiny bit of sexual compatibility
3. push for a meetup as quick as possible. none of this "lets meet up next weekend" nonsense
4. if you must use sexting, use it as a reward
 
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