2300+ approaches = 5 new girls. please help

nad_bigger

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Feb 15, 2019
Messages
135
26 yo
Doing daygame in syberia, more than 2200 approaches overall
approaching college girls 18-24
approach looks like this:
*from the side* "Hi (wait for reaction, if she turns away/cringes, I say 'sorry wrong person' that happens 5-10%) I just saw you (pause, kinda shy smile) And I liked you,.. do you have a boyfriend?"
I think approach does not look like spam, done 2200 of these fucking things.
So my statistics are in 3 years
2247 approaches
123 numbers
47 dates (all dates with one girl counting as one date)
5 lays.

Of course, my level at first dates and now is different, and with current experience and logistics would be 5-10 more lays.
How bad is it?

Hector Castillo told me that he approached thousands (like 8000+) and had 100+ lays.
So I am confused, are those fine numbers or am I doing something really wrong?

Things to consider:
started to read GC on approach 1000 roughly
live in Omsk, a shitty winter (down to -35C) city with not much choice (often take numbers of girls I don't even like)
girls are very shy, often afraid, not used to approach
am 6f 4 (193 cm) 210lb (90 kg), normal face, cute facial expressions, straight back, used to lift

Edit:
did some frenetic frustrated googling, well...
#1 reason is spam approaching
#2 reason is spam approaching

just walked out to buy bread, approached a girl like matt artisan does it, slowly, went incredible.
one more week of vacation, will correct course
 

rockstar

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Feb 2, 2019
Messages
71
I dont do many day game approaches, and know nothing about Siberia, so take this with a grain of salt, but:

1. Your number->date ratio looks good. It looks like when you get a girls number she likes you. Are you only asking for # when things go really well? I'd push for more #s.
2. I think you should be getting laid on more of your dates as well. Not enough info to know what you're doing wrong though.
 

ProblemSolving

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Jan 15, 2013
Messages
467
First of all, good job putting in all that work. With that said, no one should have to put in that much work to get laid. With a conversion rate of less than 1%, something is definitely off.

You are 6f4, which is a massive advantage. However, you're height might work against you by going so direct. She doesn't have time to get a bit comfortable before you're asking her out. Small talk for a bit before asking her out. You're going to be nearly a foot taller than most of the girls you approach, so be warm to make yourself less intimidating.

Also, if you're serious about improving, you can PM me a pic of yourself to make sure your appearance isn't what's holding you back.
 

ThePhoenix

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Nov 14, 2017
Messages
305
 
This probably isnʼt enough to be statistically significant, but, Iʼll go over my records since starting day game in earnest in late 2017. My first date from a semi‑recent cold approach came from approach #14; it did not go well even though the approach itself was one of my best. Second date, and first one from a fresh approach, was from approach #55 and could very probably have been a lay had I been a bit bolder. My first lay was from my third date from cold approach, which was approach #61. (The 35 figure I cited in the LR was a rough estimate based on a less thorough glance at some of the records.)

But Iʼd take about 21 off of those numbers to account for the first little while during which I was a bundle of nerves, and also a few half-opens where I just made a passing remark about something incidental but didnʼt continue. I also counted two approaches where the girl opened me.

I did have two other dates during that period, both well before approach #55, which were with girls I knew from prior to 2017. (One I knew marginally from a sporadic cold approach in 2015 and one was a long-lost teen crush.) In both cases, I got the girl home but was too scared to really escalate.

Approach #61 was fairly recent and Iʼve only done a few approach missions since.

Those numbers are not counting a few approaches I did in night game, which I donʼt usually do. But they do count three in related backstage settings (two of whom were models who were performing, one of whom I number closed even though she had a Jamaican boyfriend, lol).

Very roughly, Iʼve gotten a number on about 20% of my approaches. (Iʼve never gotten an instant date, though I rarely try.)

The total number of approaches Iʼve done is abysmal (yet I still managed to get laid!). Itʼs because I refuse to hit on anything other than black * women (so, obviously Iʼm white *, XD ) and theyʼre only 9% in my city, and that magnifies the effect of approach anxiety. I wish I would have approached 2300 girls! Iʼd have probably gotten laid 40 times by now!

(For reference, Iʼm in a very multicultural city, with overall fairly good looking women but I hear theyʼve got a reputation for being bitchy and entitled. Summers are beautiful but we get shit winter, too. Youʼre a fair bit taller than I am, but Iʼm guessing maybe your women are taller on average, too? Iʼm “middle age” but look younger, and hit on girls typically 19~28.)

---

From above, Iʼd say you donʼt close nearly enough of the approaches. Your rate of closes to dates is probably normal. But your date performance is not good.

If a girl comes on a date with you, she likes you. You should probably be able to sleep with her. However, it is easy to blow this, by not moving things along. Or by making fancy dates. Or by paying for dates.

If you can internalize one single fact, let it be this one:

Women are biologically attracted to promiscuous men who mate with them quickly, and conversely, they become unattracted to men who donʼt. They are genetically programmed to seek the sperm of males who make lots and lots of babies — meaning they easily get sex with many females. If you donʼt take her home from the first date and sleep with her, chances are you will never see her again.

As for closing more, some pointers:

  • Cut it with asking if she has a boyfriend. It communicates that you donʼt know how the game works.

  • Donʼt be too enthusiastic. Casual, low key is good. That should address the “spam” concern.

  • Opening with “hi” could work but seems to me a bit pedestrian, like how a nice guy would open. (“Nice guy” is a female codeword for “loser who doesnʼt understand women”.)

  • Rather than saying you like her — which to me comes across as maybe a bit too needy or invested, — try complimenting some specific thing you notice about her. I love it when black women wear their hair natural, so when a girl is in a twist‑out or Afro puff, I tend to compliment that. I do sometimes just go with “youʼre cute” if I canʼt think of anything else.

  • Try switching up the opens a bit. One thing I like to do is, open by asking a girl some outrageous or silly question about an item in the store. I might tap her with it to get her attention. For instance, maybe hold up the most frilly, feminine dress you can find and ask if it would go well with your bandana, lol. Humour helps to get them relaxed and open, but once they open up, then go more direct — you donʼt want to be “that funny guy”.

Look up my posts in the Field Reports section. I only have a few of them (there were more that I didnʼt get around to posting) but I tend to go into a lot of detail and explain my reasoning for things. Iʼm not really being sexually aggressive enough yet, but otherwise my basic style seems to work.

Also, put up some Field Reports and you may get more specific suggestions.

Another thing is, you may need to adjust your inner game. If you feel like what you are doing is “spamming” girls, this puts you in a bad mental state and the girls will sense it. The vast majority of guys look at girls in daytime venues but are not brave enough to actually talk to them. Women know it takes balls to do, and they like guys with balls.

Cheers,
Phoenix

____________________
* Iʼm aware some places in Eastern Europe use these terms differently, so to be clear, Iʼm using “black” to mean someone with mainly sub‑Saharan African descent (not counting prehistory) and “white” to mean someone with mainly European/Caucasian descent.
 

Grand Pooba

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 6, 2012
Messages
1,465
Location
NYC
My guess is it's fundamentals and vibe. Be warmer on the approach, dress better and less intimidating.
 

nad_bigger

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Feb 15, 2019
Messages
135
thank you all soo much, I have improved really well after making 106 approaches in one day and getting just one number, it was enough. I have posted my new challenge here viewtopic.php?f=3&t=20169
 

jakesykes949

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Mar 5, 2019
Messages
54
Yeah you're definitely doing something wrong, dude. It's hard to say without a video or any more information, but it could be a lot of things.

Your appearance, your opener, your hygiene, your body language, etc.

Generally if you VET THEM (by looking for IOI's before) you'll get a much higher ratio.

But still. Good that you're taking action. Definitely keep us posted.
 

Cody Lyans

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Mar 8, 2019
Messages
140
Biggest issue - you are not hooking
Second biggest issue - getting from date to bed

Your hook rate and getting numbers should be around 10% or more naturally (as a tall pretty decently in shape guy)

And from date to bed should be around 30%

The trick to both is probably qualifying
As in making it known you have standards and reasons for those standards girls agree with and think are important themselves
Getting on the same page with them,
Etc

From there you hook after setting up a partner in crime kinda vibe
And you seed closing to the bedroom by exploring more on the topics around standards, like quality of sex, different types of people, different types of relationships, crazy experiences, whats important versus what most people do wrong, etc

Creating authority and confidence from that, rather than just chipping away at the surface
I'd say more but I'm short on time

Just look up stuff on qualifying girls
 

nad_bigger

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Feb 15, 2019
Messages
135
I didn't answer right away, but you better believe that I am implementing EVERYTHING
 
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