Curiosity question: Willingness to walk away

Hey guys,

I'm typing this from my phone so excuses in advance for any typing errors.

So I was wondering, how rare or attractive is the willingness to walk away. I find that there is a fine line between persistence and walking away. I am a firm believer that especially with experienced girls it is important to put a contrast, be different. In how far does a willingness to walk away help with this objective? Ofcourse there is no reason to interrupt a seduction with a sudden break off, but in the face of heavy ressistance, does this really help or should we consider it a hail mary? Am I right in the assumption that most guys keep persisting in a really needy way, never really wanting to move on (scarcity/one-itis).

Thanks

It is more of a feeling of "I don't really NEED this, but I'm up for it if you are." you aren't taking it away, as much as you are letting her pull to continue the momentum.

At some point you may have to show that you are in charge of whether the seduction continues to escalate. It is amazing how much letting her pull after you have been pushing can cement the deal. It also is a clearer sign of consent. It is kind of empowering for the woman instead of saying "OK, OK OK", to say "Come Here!" and not know you will .

DK-

There's a movie about a natural named Duncan North whose entire approach revolved around a three-part strategy: "Be desireless. Be excellent. Be gone."

Wikipedia said:

Much like his fictional counterpart, North was an overweight kindergarten teacher who nevertheless had astounding success bedding women, including two of Goodman's own friends.

Out of work, Goodman began to have long conversations with North over the next two years, fascinated by his success and philosophy. This led to her wanting to make a film about North, either a documentary or some sort of one-man show. When her sister Greer became involved in 1996, they developed the project into a narrative film.

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So, as a method, it can actually work... actually walking away. But you need to be using it in such a way as you can meet the girl again later. If you're not going to run into her later, or there's no good way for you to make your way into conversation with her later, it obviously is less effective as a method.

Usually however it's more important the way Fuck This describes:

Fuck This said:

It is more of a feeling of "I don't really NEED this, but I'm up for it if you are." you aren't taking it away, as much as you are letting her pull to continue the momentum.

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You are comfortable walking away if need be. You'll be fine to do it. This removes your neediness (makes you "desireless", in Duncan North parlance).

However, you'll also hang around so long as hanging around is worth doing to you.

DarkKnight said:

I find that there is a fine line between persistence and walking away.

...

Am I right in the assumption that most guys keep persisting in a really needy way, never really wanting to move on (scarcity/one-itis).

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Persistence is, in essence, "Here's something I want. So I'll persist on it a bit to try to get it. If I don't get it, I may stick around if I'm still enjoying myself. If I'm not then I'll just leave."

Neediness is, "Here's something I want. But I have no control over whether I get it or not. So I am just going to beg and plead to get it. And if you won't give it to me, that's okay, I'll still stay here anyway. I'm just really hoping you'll give it to me."

One is about what you'll want and whether you care to stick around or not if she won't give it. The other is about what you want, but you're going to stick around whether she gives it to you or not because what other choice do you have?

Persistence has to be backed up by the understanding that if you can't get what you want, and she can't otherwise keep you happy/entertained, you're fine to just walk away.

If that "fine walking away" sense is not there, persistence very quickly gives way to needy pleading instead of suave persistence.

Chase

So, I was skimming yesterday through Chase's post searching for nuggets of wisdom and I encountered this: a reply to a post of my own which I had totally forgotten to reply to.

So I will reply now: three months later.

I think I have gotten the line between persistence and neediness down, though it did require some form of introspection. The way you (Chase) describe it, it seems to be an indirect symptom of abundance and indirectly showing the girl that you have abundance. Thanks for the eleborate reaction.

Fuck this:

I really like the way you define it actually. Also about the consent part where she has to put in some work herself, which will automatically invest. If we keep pulling, the girl barely has room to invest I guess?

Chase said:

DK-

There's a movie about a natural named Duncan North whose entire approach revolved around a three-part strategy: "Be desireless. Be excellent. Be gone."

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Thanks Chase.

I definitely wouldn't have stumbled upon that movie myself. It mustn't be very mainstream... perhaps for obvious reasons. Do you know of many more like this?

And could I just ask, do you think there was really a spider in his tent!?