Online & Apps  Beginner Guide: How to Get a Great Online Dating Profile

Regal Tiger

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Mar 16, 2015
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I wanted to make a quick guide about my own process for online dating; specifically the profile (I say start here because it'll make getting picture ideas ten times easier).

I recommend starting out by asking yourself some questions:
What makes me stand out?
What would being in a relationship be like with me?
What makes my life awesome?
What are some attractive perks of my life that I could put into my profile? *like a non douchey way of saying you're really rich*
What do I like about my life?
What would a woman like about my life?
What would a woman like about me?
What are some of my hobbies?
What are some of my dreams?
What are my goals and ambitions that I'm working on?
If my life were amazing, what would it look like? And then for maximum effect make it look like that *I'm still working on this*


Stuff like that. So start with making a boring profile outline. Something that's honest, from the heart and shows who and what you are. Then go through and spruce it up.

I'm stealing this from somewhere (don't remember where) but perfect example:
Outline says you're an accountant
Final version says you're a ninja with numbers

Or something like that.


Some stuff you'll get rid of, some stuff you'll add in later. All okay. If it's interesting people will read it from start to finish, just don't make it too big (people with options have short attention spans, and trust me, women have too many options for online dating). It shouldn't take longer than two minutes to read. Shorter is better, but if you have the life of The Most Interesting Man in the World then you can break whatever rules you want. Because people will read it.


After you have your profile done think about how you can follow the cardinal rule of just about everything in life; show don't tell.

So if you say that you love traveling, you'd better have a few traveling photos up. If you can't provide photographic evidence than leave it out. Sure, a lot of people love to travel but it's not congruent if you say you love it but don't do it. If you don't do it then you don't actually love it, it's a passing interest to you.

Love concerts? Get a pic.

Love a sport? Get a pic.

Love what the fuck ever? Get a pic.

As long as it can appeal to women. If it doesn't appeal to women (like love Magic the Gathering or playing video games? Don't get a pic lol).

This is another reason why I recommend getting a real photographer. Not only can you get a much better quality photo but a lot of photographers will be able to pose you to make yourself look better (and if you're interested, look up Peter Hurley, awesomsauce videos for headshots/portraits). Also, they'll be able to make the photograph structurally good (like follow the rule of thirds, make the background blur and stuff like that).

Talk about your passions, and if it's something a girl would find attractive then put up a picture (note the if women find it attractive part). For example; most women aren't going to get wet thinking about accountants or video games all day. But just because you can'd do any interesting pictures (unless something crazy happens in the office) you do have free reign to talk about it. Just talk about the why. Why are you passionate about it? What makes you passionate about it? DESCRIBE DESCRIBE DESCRIBE. And you're good to go. Half of your profile could be about this and you're fine as long as you're using descriptive and emotional words to talk about it.


Don't use cliches. Don't talk about how funny you are. Show that you're funny. Follow the cardinal rule of everything in life: show, don't tell.


When it comes to your pictures just remember:
Big body language

And think energy, think LIFE! You're so god damned awesome that you can't contain how happy you are in your photos. EMOTION is sexy in photos when you're living a great life. What's a great life? I dunno, you tell me! It's different for everyone.

Not into super emotion? Is the brooding pic sexy? Ya, it can be. But in my experience fun trumps it. This could very well be because of my personality though. So if fun isn't a centerpiece in your life then modify it and be true to who you are. Just spin it in an attractive way with photos and the show don't tell rule.

And if you are a brooder like Chase talks about in one of his articles: https://www.girlschase.com/comment/21887 that's okay! The OKC studies show that a picture of a man not smiling and looking away from the camera is more attractive. But most men can't pull this off (like me unless I'm busying doing something) because they don't have the personality for it. If you truly do then do it! Women find pride very attractive.

And hell, even Hank Moody cracked a smile and had fun sometimes. And he's a friggin stereotype


EDIT: and use a DSLR camera when possible. Crisp and clear photos usually trump cell phone pics. But grainy cell phone pics of an exciting life trump boring crisp and clear shots.
 

Sandman

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Apr 18, 2016
Messages
359
Re: Questions to Ask Before Making Your Profile

Great tips!

I find a neutral face with a hint of smile is best for online pics i.e. smiling with your eyes
 

Regal Tiger

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Mar 16, 2015
Messages
1,018
Re: Questions to Ask Before Making Your Profile

mrre said:
Great tips!

I find a neutral face with a hint of smile is best for online pics i.e. smiling with your eyes


Ah! I forgot to respond, my bad!

But yes! Smiling with your eyes is a part of the Duchenne smile and even if you don't have an actual smile on your face people can still see into your eyes and see that you're enjoying life.


And thank you! :)
 
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