Controlling Your Excitement for Pretty Girls

Chase

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
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Oct 9, 2012
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5,484
Ever get psyched out by really pretty girls?

I realized once while I was in college and looking at a picture of a naked girl that I was being deceived by her body. I looked at her and said, "Wow, she's hot!" Then I said to myself, "Hey, wait a minute...," covered up her body so I could only see her face, and looked just at her face alone. She was only kind of cute... not really all that pretty at all.

I didn't realize it until a few years into pickup, but the same effect happens to you in bars, nightclubs, and anywhere else women are dressed up to the nines. You know the classic complaint that women wake up looking totally different than they do when you go to bed with them - you've probably run into this yourself if you've picked up much at night. But it isn't just beer goggles or the darkness of night that colors your perception - it's the girl herself. She uses make up, perfectly-styled and shiny hair, flashy dresses, and just the right amount of skin shown off to make you drool. When I used to meet these girls in bars and clubs, I'd always be a little bit nervous... whoa, she's hot! I'd think.

When I realized how much of "hot" was actually makeup and hair and dresses, though - e.g., how come you never see so many hot girls during the day? - I decided to start forcing myself to zero in on girls' faces and rate them only that way. And SUDDENLY... all these girls that OTHER guys thought were smoking hot I thought were just somewhat attractive, or not even really all that cute at all. And I'd walk up to them, and talk to them like normal human beings, and they'd be instantly attracted to meet a man who wasn't tripping all over himself and wowed by their flashy displays.

If you've ever looked at JUST faces (say, on an Internet site), you'll notice something else happens, too - when you only look at a girl's face, even if she's BEAUTIFUL, it's still not all that impressive. That's because much of what the male brain looks at and gets excited over is the body - but if you aren't seeing her body, your excitement levels go way down.

And suddenly, you're able to talk to her without being nervous.

And suddenly, you have a much easier time treating these girls like JUST GIRLS, instead of goddesses.

And suddenly, you have a much easier time getting phone numbers, getting dates, and pulling.

Train yourself just to look at her face. It isn't easy, and you won't get the health benefits of staring at boobs (a team of researchers found that men who stare at women's breasts for 10 minutes a day receive the same benefit to cardiovascular health that a man who jogs for 30 minutes a day has), but once you do you're a lot calmer around beautiful women, a lot less awed by them, and a lot more successful with them.

Chase
 

Eternity

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Nov 20, 2012
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With yo girl...
I get nervous with pretty girls, i tend to freeze and avoid looking at a pretty face, i just pretend that i dont see them and walk past them without looking at them. Im guessing this stems from bad experiences where i would smile at a pretty girl in school and she would blow me off and ignore me.
This is bad i know but its a habit im trying to erase. Got to take it one step at a time.
 

Rasta

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 7, 2012
Messages
51
Solid tip. I was just wondering about this the other day. Am I the only one that just feels really intimidated when there's a hot girl in the room? Nope definitely not!
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Nov 20, 2012
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6,553
I saw The Tool did "Bump" on some of the older post. Perhaps this week could be great in reviving some older materials.

BUMP! :)

Zac
 

Forger_38

Rookie
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Jun 30, 2018
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6
Eh, not everyone has that kind of confidence, some need help. I used to need help and would have enjoyed to find a site like this one!

What I'd do co contain myself near pretty girls would be to find one pretty girl that you'd approach for non-relationship/sex related things. Be it a colleague, someone in your class at high school/college, someone sharing the same hobby... If you can get acquainted with such a girl while not seeking to seduce her, it will make you more confident. And later on, you'll either venture into relationship waters with that girl you're already acquainted with (so you won't be nervous) or you'll be able to get acquainted with other pretty girls without being too scared because it won't be something completely unknown anymore.
 
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