In high school I didn't care too much about my looks and fashion because I was working too hard to getting good grades and getting accepted to the national team of my sport. Yet, I ended up sleeping with one of my friends on and off for 6 years since high school. She was once talking to her friend about me and told me about the conversation. This is the highlight:
The friend: "Why are you even sleeping with him? He's not even good looking, and he doesn't have any style at all" (which is true)
Her: "I know, but there is just something about him that makes him irresistible and makes me come back for more" (which is also true)
The things that made me irresistible when I was 17, according to her: confidence in my own identity, being okay with not fitting in, knowing what I want in life, a small bit of arrogance and a sexy personality once we slept with each other. Is that even possible at the age of 17??? I assure you, it is.
I had been meeting girls since I was 13. Before I slept with her the first time, I had slept with 2 girls and had been making out with 7-8 others, sometimes several times. And I was "getting somewhere" with another girl simultaneously. So this girl from high school just felt like another girl at this point.
I
never consulted any friends when I felt insecure about girls. I didn't ask anyone if it was impossible to meet girls when I didn't feel handsome. If I felt insecure, ugly or unwanted at some point, I met girls to confirm to myself that I deserved the love or attraction I wanted. I met girls to
create my own truths. It is really that simple. And these days, I still don't consult anyone whether this or that is possible or not. If I want something to happen, I make it happen. Everybody should be able to do that.