Best Process to Loose Virginity

Witcher

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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300
Hello

A few weeks ago I moved to Japan(Tokyo) and I am still here for a time. Coming from North Africa which conservative society and fucked up logistics ( and many other reasons that also depend on me) make it very hard to get intimate with Girls. I decided to use this opportunity to lose my V Card.

So would need your advice for about the best way to do it!

Thanks to Colt Williams Silly Tinder Line and Girls Chase texting process, I am getting Tinder dates pretty easily(easier than I expected to be honest).

However, I am still confused about the best dating process to use in order to lose that VCard. One date or several dates?

In his webiste GoodLookingLooser gives a very reasonable guide where he advocates an exposure therapy approach. To go online dating and spread the courtship on several dates (like compression dating)going on each one further into intimacy until you get intimate with the girl.

Like this

In general, this is what we are shooting for -

1st meet up - Meet the girl
2nd date - Kiss the girl
3rd date - Mess around with the girl (clothing on, usually)
4th date - Get naked with the girl and mess around
5th date - Get naked with the girl (have sex - if you haven't yet)
6th date - Repeat/see 5th date
Somewhere between date 4 and 8 is when you will have sex.

By Date #6, the vast majority of girls will be expecting it.
Source: How to Lose Your Virginity

I initially wanted to follow this guide. The problem is that even if the advice sounds reasonable and doable I have some issues with it.

1st reason: It contradicts much advice in GC and so far I find GC idea still the most solid and true.

-GC Don't recommend that Virgin should really proceed differently.

Do not worry about what you need to do ‘differently’. All three of those options starts off with the assumption that you may be an inexperienced virgin. And proceeds from there. There’s plenty of advanced material for the guys who want it in both the quiz and the book/package... But I built all three to work even if you haven’t had your first date or your first kiss yet.

Read the articles and get the right mindsets in your head.

Then, take on an action plan that will get you out there, get you to talk to girls, and put women in your bed.
Source: https://www.girlschase.com/content/if-you-re-male-virgin-should-you-tell-her-or-not

-GC recommend getting intimate with girls on one date. This approach has been also recommended for inexperienced guys and virgins by some senior members like Seppuku advocating that it will give less chance to mess up.
Link: https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=18237#p91481

-Even for Multiple-Date and compression dates, GC doesn't recommend so many dates and also to not kiss at the end of the dates.

Second reason: In a busy city like Tokyo, It's hard to schedule the first and even harder for the second.

So I don't really know how to proceed. One date? Multiple date GC ways? or still going progressively like GLL?

I will finish with a Good News. All the girls I went on the first date so far (4) all want to see me for a second.

Waiting for your wisdom. Thank you!
 

Seppuku

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Witcher,

the six dates approach won't work imho for the simple reason that it is extremely hard to get a girl come to six consecutive dates with you. You risk losing them on the second, or third date.

My recommendation is to keep it super simple.

1. figure out your logistic. You need to have a place to pull (your hotel?). And you need to figure out how to pull her to this place (i.e. transportation thing) - hence the importance of having the date not too far from your place.
2. At the end of your second date (or first!), tell her (don't ask) that you guys are going to your place to listen to some music or whatever.
3. At home, escalate.

When you guys will be moving towards your home you may face a bit of resistance. It is most probably token resistance, that she has to throw "in principle" because she views herself as a good girl. Just deflect and persist, and still pull.

Another thing. During the date you may face mixed signals. Some positive. Some negative. Ignore the negative things and just follow the process above no matter what. It is a little bit of a leap of faith, because stars never align perfectly. Just be bold and do it.

It may not work all the time. But if it works 40% of the time, and you date 5 new girls, that's still 2 in your bed at the end.

Seppuku
 

silent9

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 7, 2017
Messages
16
Hey bro,

Recently lost my V card using online dating so I thought I’d tell you how it went down and share some tips I’ve learnt.

Matched with this chick on tinder and set up the first date the next day. Date was coffee in the morning on a weekend before she had to go into work. On this date I made sure to have good energy. The main thing I was thinking was I want this chick to come out on a second date. I avoid anything hyper sexual but still screen and qualify for things like her being a bit crazy etc. (always like talking about tattoos, drugs, what’s the craziest thing you’ve done etc)

On the second date I try to close. Meet at the station near my place. Grab dinner at a Thai restaurant. I make sure the restaurant is pretty quiet and it’s literally a 3min walk from my place. Date is ok (fucking hate grabbing dinner - would avoid if possible). I seed the pull by bringing up the fact I like ecigarettes. She says she’s been trying to quit smoking (in my head I’m like does mean I can’t ask her to come back for an e cigarette? - fuck it). We walk out of the restaurant and I say let’s get an ecigarrtte. Walk back to mine. At my place we talk and I try build a lot of comfort. We’re constantly moving from the couch inside to the backyard to smoke. Outside I just go for the kiss and she complies. Go back in make out on the couch some more. Getting a lot of resistance to anything more. I know the two steps forward one step back rule but nothing seems to work. Can’t get anything more than a make out. Take her to my room and she changes and gets into bed. She sleeps the night at my place but still only made out despite trying to whip out every trick to overcome lmr. Essentially this was a long makeout session. She leaves the next morning and I’m little annoyed about the whole thing.

She asks to see me later that week. At this point I’m like fuck this chick. Wasted my whole night last time and fucked me up for work the next day. I tell her to meet at the station near my place again. My attitude going in is like I don’t give a fuck about this date at all. We meet and I say let’s go for a walk to pick out a bar. I pick one we pass and we have two drinks each there. I’m doing so many pushes and acting really bored. I’m am having a lot of fun paying her out though. At one point she even states that I seem really bored. I even essentially imply the date is shit at one point and she gets offended but I don’t care at all and just play it off. We leave and I say let’s go for the ecig. She complies. At home unlike last time where I was pushing hard and trying to get in her pants I sit on the couch and start playing music. She eventually wants to be involved and want to pick songs. I say ok. At this point I realise I’ve been a bit of a dick and going for a makeout doesn’t make sense considering I’ve payed her out so much. I need a way to build some comfort back. She had mentioned earlier that I haven’t given her any compliments and I know this is what she needs. I ask her to give me a compliment and then we play this game where we give each other a compliments and pay each other out if the compliment is not that genuine. Still no touching, making out etc. At one point she says she’s tired (I know what this means). I say let’s go to my room. We go to my room. She undresses completely (no resistance). We try to fuck but the alcohols affected me. Tell her I’m not feeling it. Go to sleep. Fuck in the morning.

Things I’ve learnt
- I like to set up what I call a comfort date as the first date because I don’t think I’m at the level where I can pull on date 1. This is a date where pulling is either not possible or highly unlikely (eg coffee/brunch). This gives you the opportunity to just have fun. The aim of this date is to end with the girl wanting to see you again and I think makes closing on the second date much more likely
- You should be trying to make out/pull on every date after this. I feel a big stepping stone is passed when she knows your the type of guy who will try and close even if it doesn’t happen. I recently went three dates without trying to kiss a girl and finally just went for it on the fourth. It didn’t go down great but I regret not having tried way earlier.
- Do not act affected if the girl gives you resistance. If she says she doesn’t want to go back to yours or doesn’t want to fuck just play it off smoothly. Don’t ask why and start getting butt hurt about it. A good mentality is that it’s not if but when.
- Goes without saying but do not tell the girl you’re a virgin. The chick above was under the impression I had slept with lots of girls.
- At your place and in the bedroom play music. On the second date above I didn’t. On the third I did. Think it gives you something to bond over and makes the vibe much better.
- Don’t drink too much - don’t want to miss the chance because your dicks not working lol
- Be prepared - have condoms, lubricant etc all ready

Hope this helps and good luck!
 

Sub-Zero

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Joined
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Messages
836
U lost your virginity in 2 days!! Good job!!

How old are you and what do you do in Japan?

Are u black ? I ask because I wanted to know how the girls treating u out there? So far so good I see!!
 

Witcher

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Messages
300
Seppuku said:
Witcher,

the six dates approach won't work imho for the simple reason that it is extremely hard to get a girl come to six consecutive dates with you. You risk losing them on the second, or third date.

My recommendation is to keep it super simple.

1. figure out your logistic. You need to have a place to pull (your hotel?). And you need to figure out how to pull her to this place (i.e. transportation thing) - hence the importance of having the date not too far from your place.
2. At the end of your second date (or first!), tell her (don't ask) that you guys are going to your place to listen to some music or whatever.
3. At home, escalate.

When you guys will be moving towards your home you may face a bit of resistance. It is most probably token resistance, that she has to throw "in principle" because she views herself as a good girl. Just deflect and persist, and still pull.

Another thing. During the date you may face mixed signals. Some positive. Some negative. Ignore the negative things and just follow the process above no matter what. It is a little bit of a leap of faith, because stars never align perfectly. Just be bold and do it.

It may not work all the time. But if it works 40% of the time, and you date 5 new girls, that's still 2 in your bed at the end.

Seppuku

Seppuku,

Having tried to pull multiple dates I can see It's ineffectiveness not only in term of seduction but of possibility. I live right now in a very busy city with busy people so scheduling one date can be hard both for me and the girl. Work, Sport and other obligation make it hard to find an empty spot

I am still underestimating my ability to do that in one date or two but since your advice worked perfectly so far I will give it a full try.

By the way meanwhile, I learned how to cook some dishes, some of them unique to my country! I think I will use that to have dates at my place. Since you are an expert at them, can you share with me how you "invite" them to date direct at your place?

Thank You
 

Witcher

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
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Messages
300
silent9 said:
Hey bro,

Recently lost my V card using online dating so I thought I’d tell you how it went down and share some tips I’ve learnt.

Matched with this chick on tinder and set up the first date the next day. Date was coffee in the morning on a weekend before she had to go into work. On this date I made sure to have good energy. The main thing I was thinking was I want this chick to come out on a second date. I avoid anything hyper sexual but still screen and qualify for things like her being a bit crazy etc. (always like talking about tattoos, drugs, what’s the craziest thing you’ve done etc)

On the second date I try to close. Meet at the station near my place. Grab dinner at a Thai restaurant. I make sure the restaurant is pretty quiet and it’s literally a 3min walk from my place. Date is ok (fucking hate grabbing dinner - would avoid if possible). I seed the pull by bringing up the fact I like ecigarettes. She says she’s been trying to quit smoking (in my head I’m like does mean I can’t ask her to come back for an e cigarette? - fuck it). We walk out of the restaurant and I say let’s get an ecigarrtte. Walk back to mine. At my place we talk and I try build a lot of comfort. We’re constantly moving from the couch inside to the backyard to smoke. Outside I just go for the kiss and she complies. Go back in make out on the couch some more. Getting a lot of resistance to anything more. I know the two steps forward one step back rule but nothing seems to work. Can’t get anything more than a make out. Take her to my room and she changes and gets into bed. She sleeps the night at my place but still only made out despite trying to whip out every trick to overcome lmr. Essentially this was a long makeout session. She leaves the next morning and I’m little annoyed about the whole thing.

She asks to see me later that week. At this point I’m like fuck this chick. Wasted my whole night last time and fucked me up for work the next day. I tell her to meet at the station near my place again. My attitude going in is like I don’t give a fuck about this date at all. We meet and I say let’s go for a walk to pick out a bar. I pick one we pass and we have two drinks each there. I’m doing so many pushes and acting really bored. I’m am having a lot of fun paying her out though. At one point she even states that I seem really bored. I even essentially imply the date is shit at one point and she gets offended but I don’t care at all and just play it off. We leave and I say let’s go for the ecig. She complies. At home unlike last time where I was pushing hard and trying to get in her pants I sit on the couch and start playing music. She eventually wants to be involved and want to pick songs. I say ok. At this point I realise I’ve been a bit of a dick and going for a makeout doesn’t make sense considering I’ve payed her out so much. I need a way to build some comfort back. She had mentioned earlier that I haven’t given her any compliments and I know this is what she needs. I ask her to give me a compliment and then we play this game where we give each other a compliments and pay each other out if the compliment is not that genuine. Still no touching, making out etc. At one point she says she’s tired (I know what this means). I say let’s go to my room. We go to my room. She undresses completely (no resistance). We try to fuck but the alcohols affected me. Tell her I’m not feeling it. Go to sleep. Fuck in the morning.

Things I’ve learnt
- I like to set up what I call a comfort date as the first date because I don’t think I’m at the level where I can pull on date 1. This is a date where pulling is either not possible or highly unlikely (eg coffee/brunch). This gives you the opportunity to just have fun. The aim of this date is to end with the girl wanting to see you again and I think makes closing on the second date much more likely
- You should be trying to make out/pull on every date after this. I feel a big stepping stone is passed when she knows your the type of guy who will try and close even if it doesn’t happen. I recently went three dates without trying to kiss a girl and finally just went for it on the fourth. It didn’t go down great but I regret not having tried way earlier.
- Do not act affected if the girl gives you resistance. If she says she doesn’t want to go back to yours or doesn’t want to fuck just play it off smoothly. Don’t ask why and start getting butt hurt about it. A good mentality is that it’s not if but when.
- Goes without saying but do not tell the girl you’re a virgin. The chick above was under the impression I had slept with lots of girls.
- At your place and in the bedroom play music. On the second date above I didn’t. On the third I did. Think it gives you something to bond over and makes the vibe much better.
- Don’t drink too much - don’t want to miss the chance because your dicks not working lol
- Be prepared - have condoms, lubricant etc all ready

Hope this helps and good luck!

Thank you Silent! As I said earlier, I was thinking impossible to do it on one date or two and multiple dates seemd even less doable. I was like in a catch 22.
I will do the same and aim for two dates.
 

Witcher

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Messages
300
Sub-Zero said:
U lost your virginity in 2 days!! Good job!!

How old are you and what do you do in Japan?

Are u black ? I ask because I wanted to know how the girls treating u out there? So far so good I see!!

Sub-Zero,

1.For the first sentence, I guess you will wait a little but it's on the way ;)

2.I am 28 years old and I am working in Japan for a short time. This reminds me, should I play the guy who is staying or the ones who is leaving soon?

3.I am not black since I'am fron the north of Africa. I have a Mediterranean look. So far no bad treatment and most girls say that I look tough and intimidating by the way.
 

YOLT

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jun 10, 2016
Messages
11
A great way to sleep with a girl when you're not yet very skilled in seduction is to use date compression (having a lot of dates in a short period of time). If you're a virgin it's very unlikely that you will have the skill or sexual vibe to come across as a lover that is going to take a girl to bed on the first date. Date compression helps smooth the process to sleeping with a new girl in 5-10 days, while meeting multiple times in that period. I can go into more detail but Chase lays (haha pun) it all out here perfectly:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/havi ... ounts-time

I used this technique probably for the first three girls I slept with and it worked like a charm.

I've seen way too many inexperienced friends tell me about their great first date where they got a goodnight kiss and then didn't see the girl until the next weekend and wondered why the momentum had slowed precipitously. They didn't employ date compression and often wouldn't get to a third date or further physical intimacy beyond that first date kiss.

I wouldn't recommend the drawn out physical seduction process on goodlookingloser though. The idea of escalating that slowly on dates while at your place or somewhere private is too technical and often too slow. Sex can happen in date compression on the second or third date and you don't want to be referring back to your notes thinking, okay on this date I get to second base because it's date number X when in reality much more could have happened.
 

Witcher

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YOLT said:
A great way to sleep with a girl when you're not yet very skilled in seduction is to use date compression (having a lot of dates in a short period of time). If you're a virgin it's very unlikely that you will have the skill or sexual vibe to come across as a lover that is going to take a girl to bed on the first date. Date compression helps smooth the process to sleeping with a new girl in 5-10 days, while meeting multiple times in that period. I can go into more detail but Chase lays (haha pun) it all out here perfectly:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/havi ... ounts-time

I used this technique probably for the first three girls I slept with and it worked like a charm.

I've seen way too many inexperienced friends tell me about their great first date where they got a goodnight kiss and then didn't see the girl until the next weekend and wondered why the momentum had slowed precipitously. They didn't employ date compression and often wouldn't get to a third date or further physical intimacy beyond that first date kiss.

I wouldn't recommend the drawn out physical seduction process on goodlookingloser though. The idea of escalating that slowly on dates while at your place or somewhere private is too technical and often too slow. Sex can happen in date compression on the second or third date and you don't want to be referring back to your notes thinking, okay on this date I get to second base because it's date number X when in reality much more could have happened.

Hey YOLT

Thanks for these insights. So just to clarify :

You were using 3 dates in a 10 days time frame like in the article and you were not Kissing at the end of the 2 first. Right? So:
-Informational
-Structured Date
-Date at your house

I would also want to know what was the best way you found to end the dates without the kiss. Hug, shake hands, check kiss(like French people do)?
Thank You!
 

YOLT

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Messages
11
Witcher,

3 dates in 10 days is the MINIMUM velocity for date compression. I usually aim for 3 dates in a week (or even 3 dates in a few days), but sometimes that's not possible.

Maybe I put my own twist on date compression - I haven't read the article in awhile, but I never go on a date without trying to kiss the girl if I like her. I usually like to kiss in the middle to late middle of the first date, but usually not at the end. There's guys on here who don't kiss on first dates if they don't get sex. I don't know which way is best. I have a rule if I don't kiss a girl on the first date (or hopefully more), I won't ask her out again. I think I've made an exception once ever.

A decent first date is usually a small bite and then a drink at a second location. The second date can be something more fun (beach, going somewhere fun, etc) or a repeat of the first date at a new location, and the third date try to close. Offering to cook on the third date is a fun idea. Meeting at a supermarket to shop for the food first together and then cooking together is also fun. Maybe try to seed on the first or second date that you cook something really well, so when the third date comes around she'll be wanting to try it. Just don't suck at making that dish lol

Sometimes you may have to wait until the 4th or 5th date. That's okay too!

- YOLT
 

Witcher

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Seppuku said:
Witcher,

the six dates approach won't work imho for the simple reason that it is extremely hard to get a girl come to six consecutive dates with you. You risk losing them on the second, or third date.

My recommendation is to keep it super simple.

1. figure out your logistic. You need to have a place to pull (your hotel?). And you need to figure out how to pull her to this place (i.e. transportation thing) - hence the importance of having the date not too far from your place.
2. At the end of your second date (or first!), tell her (don't ask) that you guys are going to your place to listen to some music or whatever.
3. At home, escalate.

When you guys will be moving towards your home you may face a bit of resistance. It is most probably token resistance, that she has to throw "in principle" because she views herself as a good girl. Just deflect and persist, and still pull.

Another thing. During the date you may face mixed signals. Some positive. Some negative. Ignore the negative things and just follow the process above no matter what. It is a little bit of a leap of faith, because stars never align perfectly. Just be bold and do it.

It may not work all the time. But if it works 40% of the time, and you date 5 new girls, that's still 2 in your bed at the end.

Seppuku

It's done. Using your and GC way!

Lost the VCard (and first kiss) on the first date in less 20 minutes from meet too intimacy. Told the girl to come to my area after work, went to Starbucks found it closed, I was like shit, I kissed her outside, took her home.. fade to black. The best thing I didn't paid a dime! (I will make a more detailed report).

Thank you all for your advices and support!

--
 

ray_zorse

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That's super duper awesome. Played like a champ! I like the way you turned a problem into an advantage.

By the way, look into Love Hotels while you are there. While it is rather difficult to get a girl to go into one, it is a fun challenge that can be achieved and means a super fun time as there are all sorts of amenities: spa bath, vibrator, etc... :)

cheers, Ray
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
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Witcher said:
It's done. Using your and GC way!

Lost the VCard (and first kiss) on the first date in less 20 minutes from meet too intimacy. Told the girl to come to my area after work, went to Starbucks found it closed, I was like shit, I kissed her outside, took her home.. fade to black. The best thing I didn't paid a dime! (I will make a more detailed report).

Thank you all for your advices and support!

--
Congrats Witcher!

And that's another proof that simplicity beats all. We want to make it more complicated than it really is. At the core, here are a few truths:
Seppuku said:
  • If she came to the date, she already likes you, no need to overdo it;
  • If she likes you and she is comfortable with you, she will follow you in your bed.
  • It takes one or two hours for her to feel comfortable following you - if you do it right.
  • No need to spend 3 or more dates. One or two is all you need.
  • No need to lose time trying "to make her like you", or "getting 100% sure she likes you".
  • Just lead her to your home.

Anyway well done!

Try getting at least a few more girls before jumping into a relationship. Be aware that they will try to rope you in. And once you're locked in, your learning curve to getting girls will freeze.

Seppuku
 

Witcher

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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ray_zorse said:
That's super duper awesome. Played like a champ! I like the way you turned a problem into an advantage.

By the way, look into Love Hotels while you are there. While it is rather difficult to get a girl to go into one, it is a fun challenge that can be achieved and means a super fun time as there are all sorts of amenities: spa bath, vibrator, etc... :)

cheers, Ray

Seppuku said:
Witcher said:
It's done. Using your and GC way!

Lost the VCard (and first kiss) on the first date in less 20 minutes from meet too intimacy. Told the girl to come to my area after work, went to Starbucks found it closed, I was like shit, I kissed her outside, took her home.. fade to black. The best thing I didn't paid a dime! (I will make a more detailed report).

Thank you all for your advices and support!

--
Congrats Witcher!

And that's another proof that simplicity beats all. We want to make it more complicated than it really is. At the core, here are a few truths:
Seppuku said:
  • If she came to the date, she already likes you, no need to overdo it;
  • If she likes you and she is comfortable with you, she will follow you in your bed.
  • It takes one or two hours for her to feel comfortable following you - if you do it right.
  • No need to spend 3 or more dates. One or two is all you need.
  • No need to lose time trying "to make her like you", or "getting 100% sure she likes you".
  • Just lead her to your home.

Anyway well done!

Try getting at least a few more girls before jumping into a relationship. Be aware that they will try to rope you in. And once you're locked in, your learning curve to getting girls will freeze.

Seppuku

hank You Guys! That would not have been done without your precious advices.
@Seppuku
I am not aiming to have a relationship soon. But just out of curiosity what would you consider a good number before entering one?

Meanwhile even if I didn't do the Love Hotel thing I managed to check some little goals on the way :

  • 2 Kiss in public at the end of the date
    1 Kiss on the Dancefloor
    1 Bathroom pull makeout with an Ukranian girl that was taller than me..

Considering the fact that 2 months ago I was still Kissless virign and only went to club like 4 times. I think I made huge progress and I can do way more. I hope my journey will serve as an example an inspiration with the guys still struggling. Because even if I worked hard for that it was at the end easier that I thought.

Until the full report ;)
 

Seppuku

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Witcher said:
@Seppuku
I am not aiming to have a relationship soon. But just out of curiosity what would you consider a good number before entering one?
To me, a real expertise in women mindset comes around a laycount of 30-50. That's when you have a good panorama of the various kind of women around, their psyche, and their various motivations around men. That's when you can really spot the troublesome women from the good ones, and screen them from the onset and spare yourself years of failed relationships.

However no need to wait to reach that number, to "try" relationships! There is a lot to learn from these. I would say, try reaching a laycount of 10 first? Because you want to cement your learning in seduction before getting stuck to only one girl. You want to avoid having to relearn all this in the future!

Because even if I worked hard for that it was at the end easier that I thought.
In fact, getting laid is supposed to be easy! The reason it isn't, is because we men insist in making it way more complicated than necessary. I'm glad you realized that!

Congrats again.
Seppuku
 

jakesykes949

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Messages
54
I usually screen hard upfront and just invite them over. I'd say I have a 10% close rate, which isn't bad considering I waste zero time, and they come right over and bang.

The biggest thing is screening hard. Also maximize your appearance and wealth. It's shallow, but that's what pops the most on Tinder.
 
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