A ray of light in the darkness

A funny day. Up before dawn to get kids ready, make lunches etc and take them to school, I didn't do any real approaching although a red-haired hotty spoke to me as we left the station, I had been thinking of stopping her to compliment her but pussied out, anyway I could not work out if I had approached her previously or knew her from social circle. Hmm. I just smiled warmly and continued. In the train on the way back I was ultra tired and playing with my phone, but I happened upon a recent post from Chase noting that being tired is a big attraction booster, and I think this is right. It galvanized me to do some approaching in the central station which I did. First girl was rude, just short of a blowout, but I wasn't daunted, did a few more and ended up speaking to a married lady for a while. Spoke to a sexy young thing on the tram, and complimented her eye makeup (she had single eyelids), she didn't exactly hook, although she was friendly and farewelled me with a smile as she got off. I really liked her.

I then had a coffee and breakfast near my building, as I entered the shop I noticed a sexy woman on the phone sitting outside... I wanted to approach but she was on the phone. After a pretty leisurely breakfast I came out and she was still there, kind of getting up to go. Still on the phone but I remembered someone's advice to just open them anyway and I did so. She had me wait half a minute or so while she finished up (score!!) and then I said "that was a long call! haha, I saved you!" and chatted a little. Turns out she is in my building, in another department though. I told her her dress was very figure hugging, she happily said "Oh my God". I then went with a little push: "But I want to say one thing: You have some lipstick here". She rubbed it off. I very dominantly and presumptuously grabbed her number in the lift. Here is the text:

13:53 Me: hey [her name], good to meet another techie nerd, hope you're slaying those tickets haha Raymond
17:08 Her: Hi there
Good to meet you too Raymond, but wait a minute! Do I look like a nerd?
17:56 Me: Sexy nerd, the cognitive dissonance is throbbing from my fingertips as I write this. hehe

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I was trying to be as sexual as possible (lots of imagery there), but it looks like she's not playing the game. I will hit her up for a date in coming days, anyway.

There was another cutie I was texting over the weekend but she wasn't playing ball, accordingly when I saw a shadowy figure emerge from her shared office today who might have been trying to acknowledge me, I just looked straight ahead as if I hadn't noticed, and continued down the passage. That was probably a bit unnecessary, but I'm really liking my eye contact discipline at the moment. A high value man should look as if he's completely engaged in whatever he is doing at any given moment..

So as I was leaving the office I really felt disgusting, I was tired and my shirt was a bit wrinkled (hadn't had time to iron in the morning), I had bad breath and no toothbrush. I wasn't going to do any approaching on the way home. But actually when I got on the tram I sat opposite a girl who was not unattractive (more single eyelids), I smiled and said hi and she responded warmly, so I was onto something. I could see a Victoria's Secret logo on her handbag which she was hugging to her chest, so I joked "you have something secret in there?"... grabbed basic info and checked logistics and invited her on an insta-date, she looked disappointed and suggested we do it later. Sure, so I grabbed her phone and called myself on it, then reaffirmed each other's names, and got off with a cheek kiss, qualifying her on her coming to Australia being a very good choice (a little innuendo). For some reason the call didn't come through, but she appeared in LINE (i.e. had saved my number in her contacts, a good sign). Then

21:00 Her: This is [her name]. And nice to talk to you
21:09 Her: Unfortunately my friends wait me then I would love to join you and keep talk and practice English with you. Maybe we can have lunch or dinner next time.hehehe enjoy your dinner (ahh the sweet smell of thirst)
21:11 Me: I will teach you *lots* of things I just ate a laksa. so yummy. Raymond
21:18 Her: Oh. Laksa is really yummy.Nice choice. Hope I can understand *lots* of things when you teach me by English.lol (finally I'm texting someone who gets it!)
21:26 Me: I see that you understand my meaning perfectly. tomorrow evening is good for me.
21:32 Her: Not really understand actually. Hehehe. Maybe after work we can have a dinner.
21:39 Me: my mother warned me about women like you. so sweet and innocent
21:40 Her: Hehehe. Now I really can't understand
21:44 Me: ...until the sun goes down lol. what time? after [time]
21:46 Her: Maybe [time]?
21:56 Me: that's good. (I deliberated for some time here, but eventually decided to expand my comfort zone by setting it up really near my home, and trying a really fast pull, maybe to cook food) how about [place] on [street] (where i got off the tram). we can get a coffee then take it from there
22:12 Her: Sounds great
22:20 Her: See you tomorrow [time] [place] on [street] then. (attagirl, let's not fuck this up)
22:21 Me: That's good. and no more naughtiness, or I will be very cross. lol

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A nice bit of work there. Note I was leaning back quite a lot in the initial interaction and she was leaning forward to hear me better. Lovely. Will have to do this more.

As I was writing this up, my ex Leticia called, wanting to catch up tomorrow. She asked if I was busy in the evening and I said yes, so she proceeded to tease me about what a handsome sexy guy I was becoming and all the women I was lining up for the lay and so forth. I couldn't help but laugh about this. We'll meet for coffee in the day.

Sounds like your becoming quite a small superstar in your town now. I like how you used sexual innunedo's in your text conversation, and you seem to make it flow quite naturally as well. It seems like your ex is becoming more attracted to you by trying to find out about the girls you "lined up". Good luck with your date.

Thanks Edd! Well it's a city of 4 million so I'm still a small fish haha, but hopefully I will start to make an impact around the university at some point. I feel like as soon as I get a bit of preselection things will fall into place, but starting from scratch is kind of difficult. As it is now I'm probably known as a flirt who is either very discreet or has no results.

Now to write up the date, well the raw material I had to work with wasn't ideal, but I think I did the best I could with it. She seemed a little bit shy in person, or not so much shy but nervous, I have encountered the type before (see previous FR, "date from hell"). I have the feeling she's very much a prisoner of her thought stream, and has trouble letting go and being in the moment, she could benefit a lot from reading Tolle. So I deep dived her over coffee and inserted a few chase frames but didn't really turn it all that sexual. She honestly wasn't the most interesting person, she was okay but the main point I found to relate on was playing basketball, she said she wasn't great academically but was good at sports. We briefly touched on gym but there wasn't much to talk about there, she only goes occasionally in Taiwan and hasn't been since she arrived here. To be honest I didn't really do much with the basketball, I felt my qualifying skills were a bit off tonight, I should have acted more excited when she came out with that. Hmm.

Anyway so I was using intense eye contact and touch throughout (I had chosen a place where you sit at a kind of coffee bar, because I wanted her up close), I used a fair bit of incidental touch in the early stages but transitioned to ordinary touch, at one stage I was gently holding her elbow through a thick wool jumper and looking into her eyes and deep diving her). The intense EC made her pretty nervous, after a second or two she would nod and say "okay" or "what?" and then keep doing this while I held the EC. Eventually I would say something like "you have beautiful eyes". I jokingly wondered if we could get hold of a basketball then and there, since there was is a court at the uni nearby, but then pointed out that I didn't have my sneakers on. "But I do have some plans for you, we are going to go and play a game, not basketball, but a game. Let's go".

So I led her to electronic darts. This is one of my date processes, I have quite a lot of different date plans to suit different requirements, but I was having a lot of trouble figuring out which one to use on her, since she rescheduled by 2hrs so my original plan of making fried rice with her was a nogo. I'd eventually just decided I would play it by ear, I'm experienced enough to figure it out on the fly. This went pretty okay, she had a large cider (which I figured would help make her less nervous), but we had a little problem since neither of us had cash so we had to leave and go to the cash machine and come back and pay for our drinks. I think this caused a state change, and it was not at all ideal. When I met her at her cash machine after going to the nearby convenience store by myself to use my own cash machine there, she was fiddling with her phone (something she did a lot during the date, she wasn't rude about it, but whenever I wasn't engaging her she'd get her phone out and check it), and saying that she'd go meet her friend after our game. I didn't know how to handle this, so I fixed her with intense eye contact until she said "is it okay", and eventually said in an offhand tone "I suppose".

So now the game, well I must say I followed my normal process brilliantly, I lost the first few games after having told her she had to kiss me if she lost, but eventually I came back and she obligingly kissed me on the cheek. A bit later I then cheekily slapped her bottom while she was taking a shot, causing her to miss, and it was pretty much game on after that, she was getting extremely physical with me. She loved it, although it did get a little same-same eventually. So I pulled her in to me, fixed her with the intense EC and said "you are really getting the idea of this game, aren't you" ... as well as some innuendo about cheating, et cetera. After 3 games I sat her down and held her hand in my lap saying something like "when we met, you seemed a little nervous... now that we are starting to relax together, you want to leave already?" and she says she has to meet her friend, I "I can't understand why, if you're busy and your friend contacts you with a problem, wouldn't you just say I'm busy at the moment?"... she said "it depends how big the problem is" and I thought, bullshit, she's nervous and concocting this story to cut things short, well I'm just fuckin gonna pull her anyway. A bit more chatter ensues, she's pushing for another date and I'm saying I wouldn't be happy making time for her only to have her cut things short. She says next time we can play basketball, I say "have you ever played contact sports? ... I think when you are an adult, contact sports are preferable"... and more intense EC. I then say "drink up, we're going".

So I take her hand as we're leaving the darts. We get to the tram tracks and she says "you are getting the tram? I'll go and find my friend". I completely ignore this and lead her across the road, so far so good. After a block or so I consider some pull talk but I decide against it. Instead I say "I think you worry too much about things"... chitter chatter "for example, when I look into your eyes, it makes you nervous". She admits this is the case. I say "try to really relax for me -- don't worry about anything". She seems okay with trying to really relax for me. I lead her another block or two. It's getting a bit more off the beaten track now, and we're nearing the spot where I manhandle kissed the Latina, Nina, on the way home, however it wasn't a good spot and I'd noticed that there's a darkened entranceway just afterwards, which I'm aiming for. We are nearly there when she really starts to change her mind and pull away. I say "nearly there" and pull her into the doorway. I then arrange her so that she's standing in front of me about 5cm from my body. She's nervously holding her bag. I look into her eyes for quite a while, she's nervously saying "what?" etc. I say "now, I need you to really relax for me".

She's kinda sorta trying, but making a bit of a hash of it, she literally cannot relax. I put my arms around her and demonstrate tensing my body and then letting all the tension out. "Can you do that for me?". I put her arms behind my back and pull her in a bit more. Tension builds. She says "what?" and I say "I'm looking into your eyes". I come a bit closer, but I'm really more into kiss teasing than actually kissing her at this point. After some silence I say something along the lines "You seem to be trying, but I think we have a little more work to do. If you can follow instructions, then I think there is hope for you". I then take her hand and start to pull her home again, but she resists. I'm thinking of ending it there and walking off, but I decide to have one more crack at it. She's saying she will go meet her friend. I pull her back into the doorway and I say "I think that you made up the story about your friend because you felt excited and nervous, and that is why I would like you to really relax. Just don't worry about anything."

I then lean in and kiss her for a while. I'm nibbling on her lips and ever so tentatively explore for the tongue but it's not there, so I decide to cut things short and go for the pull again. However, she will not link arms in mine. I stand like this for about 5-10 seconds with my elbow held out, then I decide it's getting too chasey, so I just caress her cheek with my hand and whisper "bye" with intense EC and turn and leave. NEXT.

Edit: I forgot to say that I number closed a Chinese princess tonight, I really liked her -- I was having some dinner in a Chinese place I hadn't tried before, and I first flirted with the waitress saying it was a huge table and I would need her to keep me company while I ate... deep dived her for a while etc... she then promised she would find some company for me, I said she had better be cute... eventually 2 very cute girls were brought to the table, I was very attracted to the one on my left and they were chatty and friendly. I had her tell me her Chinese name among other things, hard to pronounce but she shares a surname with one of the emperors and so I joked that she was a princess in disguise -- incognito in Australia and so on. They asked where I'm from and I said I'm from outer space -- I'm an alien in disguise... I pulled down my scarf and pointed to my neck and said "look, I even have some wrinkles, they are very realistic haha"... this was pretty funny, I deflected most of their questions but eventually admitted I'm Australian. Her friend went to the toilet and I chatted a bit more, then took a wild guess and said, are you at [my uni] by any chance... she is... I asked if she lives nearby (because I know it's not semester time)... she does... so I said we will have to catch up for coffee there, and she happily agreed. Got her number and called her and she was going for her bag to check her phone when her friend came back. I didn't want to make a big deal so I just nodded and smiled, although it might have looked a bit sleazy (like I was hurrying to get things done before the friend came back). I felt a slight state change, I chatted a little more, making some innuendo about whether she can crack the whip, and that I'd test her out (because she's training to teach teenagers). However, I then completely fucked things up by kissing them both goodbye, normally this works very well for me, but the friend I felt wasn't totally down, although she acceded, and my princess was sitting further away making it rather awkward. I slowly leaned in and she offered her cheek and I kissed it, but I saw her kind of grimace a little bit afterwards (maybe it's my stubble or my breath? I think both okay though). I felt things were fucked at that point. I wasn't even going to bother with an icebreaker but I just did it then -- decided to address the issue directly, just for self amusement. "hey Princess, just got home, was an interesting night. hope u enjoyed that kissxxxxfish, it looked yummy haha Raymond".

Ray,

It's incredibly admirable how you ran that last outing, pushing to the very end. And I'm not just saying this to butter you up. You were honest and went for what you wanted. You gave her a couple of chances and then when it didn't work out, you just cut it short without any unnecessary bullshit. This in my opinion was a model date - it doesn't matter that you didn't get her (her loss!). The important thing is that you acted like a baller in the truest sense of the word!

All too often, when a date is going south, I get in the utterly beta mindset of "Oh, we're already here, I'm not gonna hurt her feelings, I'll let her leave first" instead of pushing fast and letting it explode. It really is an embarassingly weak mindset that I must stop.

In spite of the issues with your relationships, you should be extremely proud of yourself, truly.

Thanks for setting a great example!

Lately I have been feeling a bit weird but I have in the last day or so realized it might be due to nofap, I've been fucking aggressive lately in my approaching but also had some mood swings, esp when it doesn't go my way, my time of the month haha. Overall I think I'll be fine if I get my shit down to the gym and pump some serious iron for the first time in a while -- testosterone boost with a side of beta endorphins.

A bit of a useless day. Currently gaming some chicks but nothing too notable. Pipeline not that full so I forced myself to do some approaching, even though not really feeling it. First chick thought I was an animal protester when I asked about her coat and looked a bit scared. Was not warmed up so failed to recover well. Next 10~15 failed to hook, my approach must have been off, anyway I was trying to get at least something to happen before calling it a night, got a couple of longer convo with girls with boyfriends, got some good banter in but was maybe trying a bit hard so eventually fell flat. A little deep diving but overall a horrible outing haha. Gonna go to sleep and get up early for the gym. Yee haa

So I went to the gym and hit it hard and I was happy. I then had a pretty relaxing day which involved sleeping a bit, going in to the office, attending an end-of-semester lunch, flirting outrageously with a Chinese girl I hadn't met before, was feeling her arse and making chase frames and saying sexual shit etc, all good fun, although she refused number I think she got into the spirit of it haha. I was totally locked in and displaying least effort while I had her come in close et cetera.

I then had a date which I am not going to focus on at the moment, perhaps a FU, we will see. It's a bit of a complicated situation that would take time to explain. Suffice it to say you can sometimes break the rules a bit when you get more experienced, but it often backfires. As I said, we will see. I really like this girl though.

So after this I went to sleep for a while because I am currently focusing on n-game. I woke up a bit too early to go out, so spent half an hour hitting up various girls by text and checking what they were doing (tentative arrangement to meet a girl whose number I grabbed in a club). I headed in to the office for a few hours, did some work and hung with my buddies. Everyone is working hard at the moment, but I've organized an outing for tomorrow and a few of the guys are coming.

Finally I was ready to hit up some clubs, well I was totally fuckin warmed up, grabbed this chick's number in the tramstop having barely left the building, chatted up another chick during the tram ride although she refused number in the end, eh, did a bit of street approaching as I got near the club, then I went inside and met quite a few girls, also made friends with bargirl, dj and other staff... eventually I decided to leave though, because it just wasn't going off enough, the dance floor wasn't crowded and the music was slow. On the other hand, this probably had the best picking up of any club I went to in the night, if I'd waited a few hours.

So I did some more street approaching which went well and eventually got to this other club which is pretty grungey, a sort of student hangout but there were a lot of oldies too... felt my age when some AC/DC came on but anyway I loved it. I didn't do a whole lot of approaching, spoke to 5 or 6 girls, only one of them was notable and I think she was a lesbian, we bonded a bit over the music. She was covered in tatts and I wasn't attracted. She did however go and get some more girls for me to talk to. Eventually decided to blow and went to a megaclub that I know that I thought was sure to be awesome (haven't been there in a year or so cos I was annoyed at being knocked back last time), anyway this time I couldn't get in because I wasn't wearing a collared shirt.

So at this point I decided to give up and go to the pussy factory (my favourite club), I was keen for some variety but eventually I just wanted somewhere good. I wasn't really on form during the walk there, but I did various approaches in the shopping centre part before reading the club, was okay. Anyway, when I got to the club the first girl I spoke to was fucking hot to trot, I sat down on a seat opposite her and asked some basic questions, she was refusing to come closer and wanting me to, but this frame rapidly collapsed and I then grabbed her hand and pulled her on to the dance floor. She briefly spoke to her friend and then came with me. At this point she told me apologetically that she was very drunk, and then proceeded to grind on me, OMG this girl was just waiting to go off. I can't remember her name. We dirty danced for some time, I was fondling her tits through her dress and I had my hand up her blouse etc, I did what I normally do which is to pull her in very close and go for the intense eye contact and kiss teasing. She loved it, rubbing her pussy on my legs and getting down and dirty.

I was just thinking I might cut corners and go for the club makeout (I thought she might be a bit drunk to make it to my house), so I was gonna pull her off the dance floor and go looking for somewhere, when her friend came and snatched her away. I went and did some other approaching, and I noticed they were completely gone from the club shortly after that. What a fuckin bummer. Anyway, so I had a little conversation with a girl who'd been in front of me in the queue (complimented her passport photo) and did some dancefloor approaching and some bar approaching (lots of mateguarding going on, and some cockblocking by friends, this one girl was pretty funny as every time I asked her a question she'd consult with her friend about whether she should answer it)... and then things took a really hilarious turn, which is the main point of the report and what I will describe next.

So I saw these 2 hotties sitting down, someone else standing up who I thought was a girl initially but turned out to be a dude. I'll call them Barbie, Natalie and Michael. So I waved at Michael with a big smile and came over to say hello, talked to him for a bit with my arm around him and then realized he was a dude. By this stage he's invited me to join them and has offered to buy me a drink, well he couldn't decide what to buy, so I eventually just jumped in and grabbed 4 jaeger bombs which I paid for, I hadn't drunk all night and was kind of about to pack it in and go home (it was 2am) so I figured there was no harm in having a drink.

This really put everyone in the mood and I was bowled over by their friendliness, I would've expected these girls to be kind of bitchy (or particularly Barbie since she was stunning), but they were fine. Eh, well it turns out Michael is gay and I'm quite attracted to him, the girls are kind of pushing us together and so I figure I'll just play along a bit and see what gives, I've been thinking of hitting up a gay club for a change of scene anyway, and in this case I did not even have to. So we get a bit of dancing action going and eventually we decide to blow, I invite them back to my place, but we decide to hit up one more club first (that goes till 5am).

So we stay for a couple of hours at this club and everyone gets smashed, Barbie picks up a dude (none of us can remember his name) who turns out to be a prison guard, he was pretty fuckin beefy, a bit old but basically a cool dude, so she's kinda flirting with him and making out a little and dancing and I've decided that everyone's gonna have more fun if Natalie has a dude as well. So I go around auditioning some dudes for the role, I found one guy who was pretty much perfect, I'll call him Oswald -- he was by himself, he was young, handsome, reasonably well spoken, not drunk, no bad breath... I chatted to him a bit and then Natalie came over (this girl clues on pretty quick) so I introduced them to each other and told Oswald "we are getting a crew together -- talk to her". Well, nothing happened, how terrible, I think this guy was a bit shy to talk to her, or perhaps he isn't attracted to Asian? I spent a while auditioning other guys but no dice. I also did a bit of random approaching while the others weren't looking, spoke to some attractive women but nothing all that notable, so I just rejoined the group.

I also had to do a bit of looking after the girls who were pretty drunk by this stage, I definitely got a feeling of what it's like when a group of girls go out. Natalie was getting some unwelcome attention so I had to keep my arm around her and basically make sure she was happy, while Michael went to the bar, toilet etc. At one stage she went off to the toilet for quite a while so I had to recruit some other girl to go looking for her and make sure she was okay, but she was fine really.

Anyway so we decided to bail back to my place, I told prison guard that he's coming with us and after a bit of a long walk we eventually got there. Everyone was fuckin starving so I cooked a bbq, some rice, and other stuff... I had Barbie make some bread, I figured it wouldn't hurt to build up some compliance just in case everyone fucked off or fell asleep and I could take a shot at her. Barbie and I got on pretty well. Prison guard's game was pretty shit, when they started talking on the couch they quickly realized that prison guard's girlfriend is a colleague of theirs (weird that), and Barbie goes cold on him and wants nothing to do with him. He should've isolated her straightaway. She then proceeded to pretend she'd never been attracted to him in the first place and say he just wanted a fuck, etc.

So anyway I've got everyone fed and wined and we have some beats coming out, got the smoke machine cranking and the lights and the mirror ball, and the party's basically on, this goes on for a number of hours when prison guard decides to leave and I grab his number (not sure if I'll do anything with it, he was a bit rueful about what had happened, but I said nah, don't worry mate, there's shitloads more girls out there, we can go pick some up if you like)... Matthew is alseep by this stage, I'd been making out with him in the club (to the great amusement of the others) and I was pretty okay with the idea of going further, but since he'd vomited on the way home I wasn't really down for it anymore, luckily it wasn't an issue because he was unconscious.

So we get out some karaoke and various other entertainments, I also have the girls put my makeup on, by this stage they've convinced themselves that I'm as camp as a row of tents, and they're saying things like "I like a man like you! You're gay and we can tell you absolutely everything", et cetera, I just smile knowingly and say nothing, but my heart sinks a bit because I know that incongruence is the death of attraction and they'll drop me like a hot potato if I make a move. Shame that. I was still game to try (if Natalie fell asleep which it looked like she was going to at one stage), but I actually found myself getting into the gay mindset and just relating to them as a gay man, I wasn't all that interested if the truth be known, even though they were pretty stunning. I think what it is, is that I have sufficient abundance that I'm cool with just being their buddy. They want to hang out again soon, I have everyone's contact. They promise to cook for me.

It's got light and they've gone, I've hugged and kissed them all goodbye. Interestingly Michael didn't seem down for any kissing etc at this point, I don't know if he lost attraction or if it was tiredness or what, but I didn't really mind (I can sorta understand how a girl feels -- she's kind of okay with going along with whatever).

They thought I was a pretty amazing guy, since I basically had everything handled, most problems that came up during the night I had a solution for. Nice one.

Last night clubbing, scored dance with a gorgeous tall Thai chick within moments of entering the crowded club, I should have grabbed her number, as she was babysitting a friend who turned out to be a bit of a spoilsport, wouldn't dance or have fun. Approached a lot of other chicks with good reactions but no results, I was mainly focusing on getting drunk with my friends and partying, this went pretty well haha.

Tonight wedding expo, short version is I did some approaching, then I watched a performance which had a fair bit of audience participation, I ended up having to dance to Uptown Funk which was sung by my friend (she grabbed random guys out of the crowd including me), also participated in a game where people had to dance, first team went well to Michael Jackson Billie Jean (dudes had like ALL the MJ moves), second team had to dance to Gangnam Style but refused to compete, it turned into a bit of a melee as the MJ-dancing dudes tried to pull the girls to the front of the stage and help them compete, I eventually broke the deadlock by striding onto the stage and swiftly picking up a girl I'd approached earlier, and carrying her to the front of the stage and proceeding to grind to Gangnam Style like that. Audience fucking loved it, but she was a bit upset, so I put her down and then finished the song, pulling out some pretty crazy moves too. She wouldn't talk to me afterwards, but I won a $100 voucher haha.

I approached a lot of girls including one who was basically like my dream girl, I fucking loved her outfit, her face, her figure, her makeup, everything... well I think she may have seen me about to stop her and compliment her, and changed direction and went to speak to my friend, hmm, but after the dance performance I felt like the shit so I went and did a seated opener, she was polite but non receptive so I fell out of love with her haha. One girl I really liked though, was very receptive and ended up pulling me up on stage and having photos taken with me and various things, I wish I had asked her for her number earlier but afterwards we were surrounded by too many people so it wasn't discreet. I should have grabbed her phone and instructed her to text me the photos, but unfortunately did not. Maybe I could get my friend to do this for me.

Anyway, I felt the environment was hostile to pulling, everyone was Vietnamese and especially after my IDGAF antics and getting interviewed by the MC about my dance routine, I think they felt a social pressure not to be too receptive to me, although I'm willing to bet that every girl there got her panties wet about the idea of being bodily picked up and thrown around the stage. I did get some dances, they were conservative but some of them were willing to be led to the dance floor and move a little in my general vicinity. What I'm happy about though, is that I now have plenty of reference points with daygame and basically an inexhaustible supply of women to open, so in an environment like this I don't hate myself, I just recognize it these days as an environment that's pretty hostile, and in which it's best to just have fun and be non reactive.

Ray, the energy of that event is palpable. Fun to read about your antics there. What the hell is a Vietnamese wedding expo and how did you become the persona-grata there?

Also, funny how fast one can become attracted to and then repelled by a girl.

Re the wedding expo, it's b/c a colleague, who is Vietnamese, his gf works for this company doing wedding singing gigs from time to time.

Tonight's date, hmm. I feel a bit meh. This girl was unbelievably cute, and smart, amazing smile, amazing clothes and makeup, I may have pedestalized a little perhaps, that might be the issue?

Anyway, she rescheduled by 1hr this arvo, then texted near the meeting time very apologetic that she was on a train and would be held up a short while, no problem there, since our communication was good. But the problem was this led to it being quite a traditional restaurant date instead of the casual bubble tea that I'd intended, and I think this set quite a bf tone, which I wasn't super pleased about.

We got off to a good beginning, vibing well and connecting while walking to restaurant and waiting for a table, but I became a bit nervous while eating, was trying a bit too hard and some of my jokes fell flat, hmm anyway well I detected that I wasn't following least effort, wasn't allowing her space to invest and wasn't relaxing my facial muscles (which makes me look tense, also old and grizzled, even though it mainly happens when I am laughing a lot and saying funny shit). So I forced myself to shut up and concentrate on my food for a bit, and consciously relax, and things improved a lot. I did feel the tension slipping back a few times during the date and repeated the procedure.

After this we had a great energy while I was walking her to darts (it has been said that my dates involve too many steps and this could've been the case here, but my feeling was that I wasn't comfortable yet so she might not be either)... told her we were going to play a game and to wait and see. Well she loved it. The 2 games went super well. I escalated touch A LOT and this went okay, she wouldn't kiss me when she lost though, first time she said next time, second time I was pretty stern "you lose... pay up" and pushed a little, third time I decided it would look too chasey, so I just didn't pursue it.

So I decided it was time for a break and some comfort building, moved her to a seat in a quiet corner and started the deep dive over some soda waters, had to get up to move our gear for another group and when I came back she was checking her phone with a body language I know all too well -- went off to make a call and came back saying she has to leave now, friend has called her like 10 times with some emergency... I wasn't sure whether to believe her or not.

So I made my displeasure somewhat felt... said "hm" and fixed her with a stern expression and strong EC for some time... broke it by saying "well, I would have liked to see you again, but unfortunately I'm not free"... she replies "yes, for 2 weeks right?" (actually it's 3 but I minimized it a little)... I say "yes, and that's why I think it would be better to keep hanging out now... couldn't you tell your friend you are busy?" ... I hold the strong EC until she starts explaining and justifying herself, she says "next time?"... I respond "we'll see".

Hold the disapproving look a little but decide to forgive her, so I say "I'll walk you out" and we gather up our stuff. Near the tram stop I kiss her goodbye, but it's a little stiff. The fact she doesn't really offer her cheek makes me think this might be dead in the water, not really sure what to think? What went wrong? I think my game being not on point in the restaurant may have hurt me later. I also think I moved too slow, maybe she was wondering when I would get to the point or maybe she bailed at the moment she decided I was too slow and had disqualified myself as lover?

Anyway, she's really nice although I did not really feel a strong closeness, I only feel that with girls who get my humour normally. Though that wasn't on point tonight. She did however say many extremely good things about me on the date, so perhaps it is not over. Guys, how did I do? Help me understand this please. Or, is it just a random unlucky event? Take home for me is, practice least effort and be relaxed and confident, not nervous and try-hard, especially when using humour or deflecting questions with humour.

Wanting to redeem myself after date FU I hit nightgame pretty hard, was on fire in the earlier part of the night, grabbed some close dances and came close to pulling a chick, she was down but accompanied by one friend, I separated them briefly but she rejoined us later. Umm, so they left, I grabbed no. although my heart isn't really in it. This was in a gay club, I was wearing makeup but correctly telegraphed a sexual vibe and was bantering a bit with my secret agent schtick, she correctly guessed my mission

Next club I queuejumped by approaching a tall Macedonian chick in the line, started off promising but fizzled out. Did a shitload of approaching inside, made friends with several groups and a gay guy, but nothing all that promising eventuated. I was talking to a girl who was okay, nothing special and she said she had no money, so in a friendly spirit I offered to buy her a drink (knowing full well it was counter to seduction but wanting to be nice, she probably thought I was gay anyway), her whole demeanor changed and she bailed. NEVER buy drinks for random girls, hahaha.

Things went a bit better later, got some slow dance but again nothing too promising, I liked a girl I played table tennis with, but she fucked around too much when I tried to move her. At 1am lights came up, did one last ditch approach to some blonde chick and I think my eye contact was just too intimidating because although she was not unreceptive to it (and my touch), her friends violently cockblocked, trying to push me away and yelling nasty shit. I could see the ringleader was as horny as fuck so I just smiled and put my arm around her and whispered "you seem to be grabbing some of the action for yourself... you're beautiful when you're angry"... of course this enraged her, another one jumped up in my face trying to push me over/away so I just stood my ground and said "the club is closing, why don't you leave".

So they did, I approached a few more chicks and then I left, to discover angry chicks had been complaining about me to security, so I just laughed and told bouncer "we don't seem to be on the same page"... bouncer was pretty cool so I had a brief discussion with angry cockblock girl in which I asked what the problem was specifically, then acted surprised and said "yeah, I'm a naturally touchy person... 5% of women don't like that, the other 95% fuckin love it, so I think I'll go with the 95%..." smirked a bit and then added "you seem to be in the 5% that wants to cockblock themselves"... she snarled back "I don't want your cock"... bouncer asked me to leave so I walked off and approached a seated chick, the whole gang of them just attacked me then. I asked the chick "do you know these people?" and attempted to touch her arm which is basically my normal goodbye, of course they threw themselves between us... bouncer came over and asked me to leave again, so I jumped in a cab, although I had it pull over 5 seconds later to approach a cute little Asian standing on the nearest corner, she wasn't down for further clubbing but I grabbed her number anyway.

Pussy factory, well, meh, my vibe wasn't really on point, I had a few good interactions but also collected a lot of blowouts etc, including some girls that I liked the look of and persisted a bit with. Grabbed another number, I danced with her a fair bit but she was with one friend and they left. Yeah, well, I thought if I just persisted my vibe would come good, and it did to an extent. I tried to get a makeout in a dark corner with a fatty in her 50s and spent a while building comfort and trying to escalate, but she deflected. She was dropping escalation windows like atom bombs (where do I live... telling me she came alone by car... wanted to leave etc... but I wasn't down to pull her, so I ignored them). I bailed half an hour before close, still just was not feeling it I suppose. Did a little street opening and McDonalds game but no real dice.

A frustrating day but overall I'm proud of myself for putting myself out there and persisting no matter what. I have a phone full of numbers that I don't really want, but would have considered this an achievement earlier in my journey, haha.

It's 9am and I have realized my mistake in last night's date, not only moved too slow, but missed a window -- her asking about housemates -- FUCK, I want to cry... why is it when 50s fatty drops escalation windows I'm observing and smirking... when gorgeous girl I like does same I've pedestalized? FUCK. So frustrating, as I was JUST ABOUT to pull anyway. FUCK.

Now it's 11am, I've taken a run to the gym, pumped some iron and approached a few cuties in the street for nice conversation. I feel better. Nightgame takes it out of you tho.

Ray, you have got amazing drive, making yourself do nightgame after the date and putting it ALL on the line. Truly admirable!

I agree with Snipefield!

ray_zorse said:

, her friends violently cockblocked, trying to push me away and yelling nasty shit. I could see the ringleader was as horny as fuck so I just smiled and put my arm around her and whispered "you seem to be grabbing some of the action for yourself... you're beautiful when you're angry"... of course this enraged her, another one jumped up in my face trying to push me over/away so I just stood my ground and said "the club is closing, why don't you leave".

So they did, I approached a few more chicks and then I left, to discover angry chicks had been complaining about me to security, so I just laughed and told bouncer "we don't seem to be on the same page"... bouncer was pretty cool so I had a brief discussion with angry cockblock girl in which I asked what the problem was specifically, then acted surprised and said "yeah, I'm a naturally touchy person... 5% of women don't like that, the other 95% fuckin love it, so I think I'll go with the 95%..." smirked a bit and then added "you seem to be in the 5% that wants to cockblock themselves"... she snarled back "I don't want your cock"... bouncer asked me to leave so I walked off and approached a seated chick, the whole gang of them just attacked me then. I asked the chick "do you know these people?" and attempted to touch her arm which is basically my normal goodbye, of course they threw themselves between us... bouncer came over and asked me to leave again

Click to expand...

And all of this is enough to make any beginner (or even higher levels) give up and just throw it all out the window. Mentally weak people would crumble at the first hurdle of this. It's so amazing to see you have that attitude of just laughing at yourself and cracking on.

SO damn motivational.

- JP

Hey men, have not posted in a bit. Been a time for reflection, well, had some dates here and there, constantly approaching, phone full of numbers but IDGAF really, although I'm not getting laid that much I have so much confidence that I'm basically just like whatever, I don't really go for high effort openers unless I feel she has earned it, just kinda go around introducing myself and assuming that's enough and she'll want to talk to me, works pretty well and if not IDGAF I just return to my day. Lately have been just setting up casual hangouts like invite her to skatepark with my kids or whatever I happen to be doing, have not really had much dating window while kids around so I'm treating it as basically just being social. Works fine, I figure if there is a need to get out any game, then it will present itself haha.

My love life is a little complicated though, still same issues as in this thread and this thread, well...

What's happened is I've been platonically hanging out with Leticia a lot since the breakup, and I must say I deeply admire the way she's handled herself, absolutely zero drama, she was upset but accepted my decision with dignity and just continued to support me in whatever way she could, also the breakup took a lot of pressure off and just allowed us to chill and enjoy each other's company... however as I realized more and more what a solid and together person she is and a calming, stabilizing, caring influence in my life, I could not help getting out some more touch and EC and sexual teasing and expressing my appreciation in many other ways.

So she's kind of bided her time and allowed the tension to build a little as we've escalated to more and more time spent alone together (initially it was just cafes, shopping etc)... then tonight she's seduced me, there's no other way to say it. Well I had already decided to push as hard as I can in my holoday the next 2wks to try to get my close rate acceptable and then to take a break from PU to try a live-in, exclusive relationship with Leticia. But I did not want it to happen right before my holiday. Well she hung out with us from midday (happily waiting around in the city for me to finish gaming some other chick who joined me and kids for a picnic), helped me with kids and housework, accompanied me to drop them to my ex (who has now been introduced to Leticia), then I suggested an early dinner and film at an arthouse cinema, had checked screenings... no, she felt like cooking at home. Sure, so we bought beautiful fresh ingredients and brought them back to mine to cook an intimate dinner for 2... then she said she wanted to watch a video "like the one with the bad, bad man in it"... i.e. a sexy film, which she used to hate before, we argued a lot about it. By this time I suspected something was up and started with some gentle chase frames... gave her a backrub over dinner and put on a sexy film, snuggled up next to her and ended up grabbing a doona from upstairs... she's now casually folding the couch into a bed, hahaha wtf I realized that given she waa throwing herself at me the results of trying to slow things down would be a catastrophic missed window, so given I wanted r/ship with her and had been concerned she might not trust me a second time, I went for it. Fucked her good, she loved it. I then ate her until she came multiple times, a big breakthrough as I hardly had to hassle her at all, just firmly insisted, despite she was on her period and usually thinks it's dirty even without the period complication.

So we have a good talk on the way to take her home, though I don't commit to anything just yet. I also see Sayuri has messaged, perfect fucking timing, had basically given up on her cos she never really invests & has been teetering on point of auto rejection, well we exchanged some email a while ago with some honesty and admission of mistakes on my part, apparently this had the desired effect cos she texted me her new number and we talked for half an hour. This is totally retarded because I'm hanging out w her in a hotel in Kobe in a few days time and I think I can't have sex w her because it would be leading her on, since r/ship with her is no longer possible. I left it open for as long as possible but.her failure to invest in a timely manner made me make orher choices. Well I felt pretty lonely when she stopped msging but I suppose the tables are turned now. Oh, fuck it.

So I packed my bag and went out for some hilarious nightgame, did lots of approaching, scored an incredible club.makeout, was pashing her on the dancefloor, hand up her jumper, rubbing her pussy etc, not to mention having her lean over the dj booth so I could spank her in full view of all the other hot women I'd been grinding with... then I took her to a private booth that some ppl were trying to reserve, told them that wasn't on, entered anyway then removed the lightbulb and proceeded to remove her bra so we could bite each others nipples etc, I got to her clit briefly but she eventually wanted to go and dance again, I said sure and then realized my flight was in like 2.5hrs so I told her well I've got your number, back in 2 weeks... now I'm at airport. Mobilenearly dead so I'll go put my makeup on and chat to some more ladies, can't be hunched over the phone at a time like this (already approached 5~10 in the airport w good reactions but decided to take a proper break and eat and report, I haven't slept and I'm quite exhausted... boarding soon too).

Hope u enjoyed the report gents. Take care y'all...

Hey Ray, Coming to Japan again pretty soon?

Hey Mr.Wes I'll see Sayuri today and after that I should have a better idea what I'm doing. Although, my phone is full of nynbers and I have stuff lined up till next Tuesday (not just dates but plans for clubbing and various stuff)... so may have to take a raincheck on Tokyo but anyway I will PM. Good job with Miyuki hahaha read it last night and LMAO

So anyway this is just a brief update, my game is totally on point ATM, but I am going for more of a slow burn / IDGAF style rather than just burning it down with every girl I see. I have been spending time with four absolutely gorgeous JP girls -- two of whom are social circle and know each other slightly, so preselection is through the roof, I have had brief makeouts with both of them but nothing too serious, I hope that since its social circle I have more time to make something happen. But if not, IDGAF as I'm just mucking around and being in the moment and making women smile

As usual the men in the circle are full of excuses as to why they cannot make anything happen with these hotties that are in such abundance (they're not Western, they're not handsome, they're not young, they're shy, Japanese men cab't break social rules, etc, etc... basically they need to read the "XXX girls only want YYY" article). But I have a hangout planned for Sunday where I'm gonna take my buddies to approach some chicks in parks or shopping centre or whatever. I have also tried to explain "bosu no gyogi" or "boss behaviour" as I call it -- that girls don't care how you look or what you are, you only have to behave like a boss.

So yesterday I had a date for chocolate with a girl who was very cute but pretty shy / boring, hardly invested at all and shrugged off all attempts to deep dive, although she accepted a back and shoulder rub and played a tetris like game with me on her phone. I think I should have skipped the chocolate and just tried to pull her upstairs to hotel for green tea, but I didn't know at the time, she was blowing hot and cold (I bumped into her again randomly after initial approach and it didn't seem to go well, but then received some thirsty text)... weirdness, have also done a post mortem with her in which I explained that I think she is a nice person but I did not really enjoy the date b/c her failure to invest, she said sorry and that that hadn't been her intention. So we'll see, we might hang out again if logistics permit.

Anyway after this date FU I went to sleep for a few hrs (my approaching wasn't going well, a bit needy and vibe not on point) then went clubbing, I persevered through A LOT of rejection but eventually hit pay dirt, I had something good going with these four girls plus some other random dudes I met and brought into a big circle (one of them, Shohei, was a fucking boss)... but it went south when I tried to isolate my girl to the bar, she insisted on bringing everyone (even though I tried Mr.Rob's technique of explaining to leader of group that we'll still be within eyesight and I promised to return her safe and sound)... they then acted like they were treating me, but tried to stick me with the bill for 6 drinks (myself, Shohei and them)... I just refused and stuck to it, said I would buy for myself and my girl and did so, eventually bar staff said we could have the other 4 drinks for free. So face basically saved, however I have a policy of never hanging out with girls who have tried to scam me, so I went and did some other approaching and met this beautiful beautiful 19yo and created our own bubble, her body was so soft and she was eating me up, compliance fantastic, sexual tension through the roof, responded to deep diving, loves dancing... beautiful clothes and sexy eyes, had the best time I had in fucking ages, and the beauty of it all was all the other biyatches who hadn't been receptive or tried to scam me were just looking on in great jealousy as I made her my princess and led her round the club doing sexy moves etc (I could see in my periphs although I never broke circle and created an incredible bubble as I have mentioned). Anyway, eventually I left on my terms after several attempts to isolate and inviting her for food, we hugged tight and long and I kissed her tenderly (cheek though) and we promised to hang out again. I also had fun with another girl who was super shy, had spoken to her earlier in the night but later just used her for triangulation, anyway she was nice. After I left I had many more fun interaction in street, grabbed a number off amazingly cute drunk girl who was responding well physically but had a friend + a bus to catch (was light by this stage), got hammered on warm sake in sushiya with a group O met (young student / hostess girl w old-man bf and their buddy who I hit it off with, plus some other groups)... there's heaps of stunning young beauties with 40+ bf's that I hung with, very encouraging for an old fart like myself hahaha.

Eh, well I won't go into details about Sayuri except to say I'm probably past the point of no return bf-wise, FUCK, if only I hadn't fucked Leticia last week this'd be fine, but as it is it's not sitting too well with me, on the plus side I covered her with whipped cream and fruit and maple syrup and chocolate sauce the first night (a pretty picture) and then we ate each other, so yummy haha... and fucked her 2~3 times a day since then, no dominance since I am working on attainability, just lots of lovey dovey and so many orgasms haha the girl is a machine, such a beautiful sex partner, so appreciative and easy to please. I hand drew her a birthday card this morning in shodo (Japanese calligraphy) and gave it to her with a cute jewelled and feathered keyring that I knew she would love. It said: "Sayuri chan happy birthday. Special person, special day. To making good memories". So, not exactly FWB territory. Anyway, her happiness was very genuine. She also looked absolutely stunning with her hair in a wave, some blush on her cheeks and sexy sparkling eye shadow. Is getting around in these sexy tight jeans and new lingerie which she tried to pass off as "some old thing that is not up to Japanese standards" but later admitted is new andvery expensive. Hehe. The only slight catch in all this is I've been in my head a lot while we are making love, which takes away from my enjoyment, trying to deal with it by affirmations but it's heavy going. My dick is up and down like a yoyo depending on how in-my-head I'm feeling. Sigh.

Funny interaction in the subway with Sayuri: I saw some girls doing a complicated handshake so I casually offered my hand the standing one, very very cute girl of 16 or so with brautiful dress and makeup, she automatically took it (out of politeness) and I then commenced the handshake they were doing... after a brief pause when I whispered to Sayuru the compliment opener I could have made instead, she said "say it" so I smoothly complimented her and got introduced to the group, then proceeded with some high energy IDGAF antics, they were shocked but thrilled... "so what's today's plan? meet some friends... go to Izakaya, shopping...?" she was kind of shy and blushingly admitted "no plan"... I shook my head "no plan, no bra, no pants... this won't do, not at all"... hahaha etc etc, ended up kissing all on cheek and getting off. Sayuri was like, "are you quite finished?" ... "I'll never be finished, haha" (I tickle her stomach and she giggles). Funny.

I will write more later, for now I have limited alone time and jobs to do. Cheers gentlemen. Pimp it up for me

Just banged out a useful insta date, she was tall and slender with a beautiful neat low key sense of fashion, a long skirt in navy and a cardigan, everything snug fitting and a beautiful soft body, slim and taut but soft in the right places. Beautiful little tits which I wanted to eat and eat. (Copped a feel later).

Opened outside station gate in underground walk, by complimenting her necklace, mentioned I was goung to an electronics store and asked abour her plan, she's from Kyoto (30min~1hr away I think), day off, come for browsing in shops etc, but no set plan. Game on. She was happy to guide me although experience tells me this doesn't work well, so I did most of the leading while effusively complimenting what a beautiful and expert tourist guide she is, hahaha.

By about 5min I had my arm around her and 10min we're holding hands and then I started to physically escalate in many other ways, touching her hair, her back, her bottom, picking her up etc. In the course of all this we went to:
1. Electronics superstore
2. Sports entertainment complex -- queues too long, bailed
3. Starbucks -- she ordered for us, I gave her $10 but she paid for herself and gave me $6 change, good girl
4. River walk, but it was too loud to talk -- so I suggested park but neither of us had any good idea -- was so fuckin loud, people everywhere, busiest part of entertainment district on a Sunday daytime
5. River cruise, I treated her because she was being amazingly patient, kind and physically compliant, what a good girl -- while waiting for cruise mercifully found a section of railing with no people, and deep dived a little
6. Pharmacy, a mistake on my part (and Google Maps) because I was looking for カラオケ(karaoke) and misread コクミン(Kokumin) for that
7. Karaoke, but it was full, 10min wait and she had to go back to station 20min later due to Kyoto dinner plans

Fuck, I have been evolving my JP date plan and the thing is I like the challenge of getting them into a love hotel despite their objections, but after some FU in this regard I've today hit on a new strategy which is a karaoke-room makeout followed by love hotel when they're good and horny, will repory on how it goes when I've tried it. Bear in mind these girls are pretty shy, other PUA such as Roosh V seem to believe that pickup is difficult to impossible in JP, that's not my experience but it's necessary to calibrate perfectly and to know something of their language and culture. That's why I'm being creative in regards to the coffeeshop deep dive -> karaoke makeout -> love hotel sex idea. I think in the specific case of (some) JP girls it may be good to warm them up a little and let them know something of the goods on offer.

Anyway back to my insta date, the karaoke girl directed us to another karaoke store and we started wandering that way even though I knew it wouldn't work due to time constraint. So eventually I pulled her into a stairwell beside a busy restaurant, I was hoping for a makeout under the stairwell but unfortunately there was a cellar. So I sat her down at the top of the steps and cuddled her and joked around a bit, then tried to escalate to kissing, she shyly said no and kept putting her hand on my lips, hahaha well wash rinse repeat for about ten min, very funny vibe, we kept giggling as I persisted, I caressed her face, her hair, her body a bit... I also unbuttoned one button and had her caress my chest inside my shirt, she seemed to like this (a great move and part of my usual escalation strategy). Meanwhile people were walking to/from the lifts just behind us and a staff dude at one stage came into the cellar for a barrel of beer, she didn't mind, just giggled a little.

So then took her back to station, in the underground I took het to a quiet spot near station gate to say bye and hug her, and say how much I'd enjoyed the day (which I had), laughingly tried several more times for the kiss and finally got her on the lips after leading her over to the gate, even if it was only a peck haha. While leading her to gate I was fondling her breast through her blouse from around the back, I can still feel it now. She wants some dick, a shame, haha.

After this I cooled down w an icecream and long convo with cute girl next to me, such a lovely person, shyly speaking English, incidentally she works in a hospital 5min from my hotel, so I've invited her for drinks and got her number. She wouldn't move (but seemed legit) and wants to bring her friend on the date, I didn't care so I said sure, and converted it to a friendly hangout at my favourite bar also near there.

Now home, had fired off various text this morning and responses dribbling in, will answer and then nap a little, and then go out again for some not-drinking game, have been on a break from PU for a day or two so I can get drunk, but regret it haha. I absolutely HATE gaming drunk, kills my vibe.