Grand Pooba's Lovable Dick

Grand Pooba · Jul 21, 2016

This is my third journal on GC. So far I'm four years into this journey, I consider myself an advanced intermediate, I regularly cold approach and do night game and attain success with awesome women, my biggest weakness is my sexual vibe and being a bad boy - that is the gap to mastery.

This journal will cover the implementation of the asshole, the 24 ways to be a (Lovable) Dick. I will post everything from interesting FRs and approaches, to LRs and LR-, to fuck ups that I learned from.

Mystique · Jul 21, 2016

That's awesome! Good to know a tribal elder will be blessing us with his experiences and journey to super mastery. We sure will learn a lot from you.

Grand Pooba · Jul 22, 2016

FR: M------ Street Approach

Found this street approach to be pretty fun, but I walked away knowing I could have improved it.

Walked out of the gym, walking down ---- street on the way to Chipotle. Spot a blond/brunette woman in a black sundress with wavy hair and wedges, smoking and leaning on a building.

Walk past her, look at her, and open:

ME: Hey, I noticed you walking by, I just had to tell you I love those earrings.
HER: Oh, thank you! I've had them for a long time.
ME: Oh! Yeah, they look like something you'd make on your own, you know like in W----- or B-----, something like that.
HER: Haha oh no, I got these for like $10 or something, I think they're from forever 21 or something like that.
ME: Well yeah, they go well with your style...

At this point she lifted up her glasses to look at me sharply (and reveal her own appearance) and I continued my remarks.

ME: Actually, wow, you have awesome eyes, and those go really well with your earrings too!
HER: Oh, your eyes are gorgeous too.

I should have said "oh wow, well...I hope you're not saying that to get in my pants."

ME: Well, those look very handmade, it would be pretty neat if you made those with your own hands.
HER: Well yeah it would, but I can do other things with my hands <said while looking away in the distance. I knew this was a sexual frame, but I didn't know what to say>.

I should have said "be careful what you talk about out here, there's little kids running around *wink*.

I asked her what she's doing out here, taking a break from work inside. We had a quick chat about what she does - some kind of an administrator at the University building we were passing, and she's going to be running back soon. I joked that she probably loves reprimanding or punishing students, and she said it's not like that.

She asked me what I do, I told her that I'm a designer....no, I'm a homeless designer, and I'm looking for a home. Pouty face. She smirked after a serious pause.

I commented on her smoking , she said she usually doesn't but lately she's been getting into it for some reason. I told her that people get into vices all the time, and then come out of it. Like some people turn to drinking, drugs, smoking, and other things...but it's usually because there's something else super stressful going on, and it's important to be accepting and cognizant of that pattern. I get it.

She agreed, and then I talked a bit about how it's funny how we all have a good side that we present to the world, and a dark side that lays within, waiting.

I should have added, "it's the dark side that can sometimes be the most fun and exciting, too. Maybe that's why people keep going down that path."

I told her I had to go, but she's cute and fun and we should grab drinks. First she agreed, and then I asked her what she's doing after work today (Wednesday) - she has dinner with a friend at 5, then a lecture at 7:30pm. I pushed a little bit, told her that maybe we can grab coffee for thirty minutes in between. Again, this stalled.

HER: Text me in the morning.
ME: Tell you what, you said you're busy with dinner with a friend at 5? And then you're lecturing at 7:30?
HER: Yeah
ME: What time does that end?
HER: 9:30
ME: Well, I usually go to the gym after work right there <point left>, why don't we just grab it after we both finish up?
HER: Uhh no, I usually go to bed by 11, and that's just gonna be tough for the morning. I want to go home and sleep, I'll be beat.
ME: So tomorrow evening then, you're free?
HER: No well tomorrow I have a class I'm teaching in the evening.
ME: Wow, so you're a serious fitness instructor too, seriously busy.
HER: Yeah! I teach yoga, pilates, and other things.
ME: I bet you have hella strong abs then.
HER: Haha well not like I used to, but they're okay.
ME: Let's feel these abs.

ME: Nice, pretty solid. So it looks like you're busy all around! Maybe we can do coffee in the afternoon tomorrow.
HER: I could get coffee, but it's not the kind of coffee that could lend itself to other things.
ME: Hmm yeah, well we'll figure something out, I've gotta run. It's M-------, right?
HER: Yes.
ME: How do you spell that?

I should have run a bit of a lecture to her how good it would feel to break her routine once to go on an adventure with a stranger she just met, using NLP and all that.

Anyway I grabbed her number and left. I called her to exchange mine but she did not pick up, so I just texted her:

ME: Hey M--------, just called you, now you have my # . -Osman
HER:

I mean, is this girl thirsty or what?
Or did I come off as too thirsty?
I want to introduce a more sexual vibe to play with the one that she was throwing out. And for the future, too.
At this point since I've come off a bit needy, I think I should not text her at all today and reach out Friday instead.

----

I texted her after work today a simple "Hey! Got caught up today. How was Pilates?" No response, I think I made too many mistakes on the approach and came off too thirsty in the end.

Grand Pooba · Jul 22, 2016

LR: Bumble N--------, 2016.07.15

FIRST SET UP:

I matched with a girl on Bumble like a month or two ago. Indian girl, cute pictures. I hardly check these apps, but I remember I said something like not checking it often, and then she messaged back saying she's been traveling but is coming into this city later that day on a flight. I happened to be traveling out of town that same weekend, so unfortunately wasn't able to connect.

She had messaged her number on the app, I messaged back by text:

ME: Hey N-------, it's GP from Bumble. Hope you enjoyed the flight, let's just get coffee next week when I'm back.

No response. I completely forgot about her.

THREE WEEKS LATER:

I had forgotten about her completely. She messaged out of the blue on Friday:

HER: Hey! Sorry I ended up being out of town the last couple weekends, still up for coffee if you're around.
ME: Hey N--------, what are you up to these days?
HER: Just been busy with work, but trying to spend some more time in this city lately
ME: Working, and galavanting around North America eh? Bet you went to some fun places.
HER: Hahha nothing too exciting, but I did make a short trip back to Canada last weekend
ME: Oh cool, I'm guessing Montreal perhaps...
HER: Toronto! Went and saw my brothers
ME: Oh I bet that was chill! Havent been there in years.
ME: Anyway yeah let's grab coffee or drinks. How's your schedule?
HER: Haven't planned too much this weekend, when's good for you?
ME: Free for a quick drink this evening?
HER: Sure, what time were you thinking?
ME: 7 or so tonight
HER: Sure that works
HER: I have this happy hour thing for work
HER: But it should be done by then
ME: Oh where is it?
HER: It's in flatiron I think
HER: Gonna have to look that up when done this string of meetings I'm stuck on this afternoon
ME:Cool. I'll text you later with the place, not sure where I'll be yet.

On this particular Friday I had a friend from North Carolina visiting me, and we had plans to go to a comedy show later that evening. So along with being pretty fucking tired that day, I was committed to seeing a comedy show that night at 10:30pm and also to hanging out with him beforehand and probably going out later at night. I wasn't sure where I'd be - I decided I could make time for an hour or so long informational date. It would be on my terms, and I would keep it at ideally 30 minutes, but definitely under one hour.

A few hours later I messaged her again:

ME: How are those boring meetings? You cool with 7:30 instead?

And again another hour later, I had figured out my schedule:

ME: Let's do zio on 19th at 7:30
HER: Sorry doesn't look like I'll be free until 8:30, does that work?
ME: ,,,,,, Zss
ME: Oops. Lol. Yeah see you then.
HER: Haha sorry! Can probably do 8 actually, so not as late
ME: 8:30
HER: Ok cool

DRINKS #1, 8:30p-9:25p:

Anyway I showed up at this fancy-ish restaurant where I like the vibe. She came a few minutes later. I picked a table where we'd be sitting at a 90 degree angle to each other at a corner by the window. Solid choice.

I didn't even remember what she looked like, turned out to be pretty cute and in great shape.

We chatted mainly about her and barely talked about me - she's from Canada, Calgary, and we spent a lot of time making fun of her roots - she defended Calgary and shit on Edmonton, shared some stories from both, and I'd take what she said and turn it up a notch.

She said she went to a hotel room in Edmonton and they found switchblades under the bed. Well, did she plant them there to make Edmonton look bad?

Calgary is a 180 of Edmonton, so if she things Edmonton is full of thugs does that mean Calgary is full of puritans and nuns like her? Why does she have to make another city sound terrible to feel good about being from Calgary?

I used to live in Houston, is that more like Edmonton or Calgary? Because we liked to shit on Dallas, and if she's not from the match it's never going to work out!

She's a consultant (made fun of her about this being a useless profession) and she shared a story how her consultant team went to Ferguson, MO and closed an industrial plant, had to lay off a huge workforce. So her job is to go shit on people and ruin lives, nice....that's what you get for having three different degrees and being a fucking smart ass.

Made fun of her for being a horrible Canadian, she doesn't even know the anthem or how hockey works. Obviously she's escaping to the US to join the ignorant dumb Americans.

She found all of this pretty hysterical, was laughing her ass off pretty much.

As the time was approaching 9:15pm, I told her that I had a friend visiting in town and we are planning to go out later on, I have a commitment to see a comedy show with him and I will need to go unfortunately, but it's been really fun grabbing drinks with her.

And then I felt and saw something I haven't seen in a long time - disappointment. This girl got a little quieter, a little more reserved, and I also could feel that she was in a bit of shock. Is he really, really going to leave me right now? She played it off cool, said things like "okay, well that's cool then" but I could feel the energy shift. I think this is something that comes with experience.

Still wanted the girl, so as I continued stupid conversation I thought about the next move - to leave or to stay...

DRINKS #2, 9:30p-10:05p:

I've realized the importance of moving girls around, it just feels like more of a varied experience and it sets a better tone - you're having multiple events together which feel like something bigger.

So I then told her I was still having fun, proposed that we go somewhere else for more drinks before I go meet up with my friend - I still had a half hour or so - and she agreed. She actually perked up.

We walked one block downtown when I realized I was walking in the wrong direction to the place I wanted to go, then we switched directions and walked three blocks the other way. I then realized that, after walking past a construction site, the place I wanted to go to was closed and demolished. And here this girl is wondering where the hell we are going, I could also feel her getting a little frazzled and the state was shifting.

So I picked the first place I saw - gotta maintain the vibe - and it happened to be another expensive restaurant with a drinks bar. Oh well, fuck it.

We grabbed another sparkling red wine that were like $11 each (ugh!) but this time we were on barstools next to each other. Her posture was now mostly facing me and her leg was touching mine, and I was still facing the bar mostly, pretty aloof. She was also touching me, and I was also touching her a lot. We were laughing and having fun.

The highlight of this experience was that she realized that the entire date she was talking about herself and I barely shared anything about myself. She kept bringing this up - "I'm telling you so much about myself and I know nothing about you. Tell me about you!" After a while, I couldn't stop deflecting, so I just started to make shit up.

Example: I told her that I was actually really embarrassed about what I do - I'm homeless. Really? Yes, really, in fact I wanted to see her because it's really uncomfortable to sleep on hard ground, I'm hoping I have a bed to sleep on tonight. Sometimes I meet women and talk to them to find a bed for the night. She almost fell on the floor laughing. Embedded in this I think was a huge sexual frame. I would turn the topic back to her, but when she'd ask more I'd make up more shit - my shack is on 20th street and 9th avenue, it was pretty fucking cold in the winter so I had to work extra hard. Etc etc.

Anyway the conversation basically went like that - I disagreed when I felt like it, I made up a lot of things, I asked more about her travels and where she's been and teased her about her job, and we were just having a really fun time. Still 90% about her and 10% about me.

Close to 10 I told her it's time to go, I need to meet my friend, and asked what she's doing later. She said she'd probably go meet up with her gay friend for a bit, then call it a night.

As we walked out we were holding hands, I told her maybe we should watch a movie later since she's not doing anything. She got excited and agreed. I told her I'd be out around 11:30pm, and I'd call her then. She tried to kiss me here and I deflected her to my cheek, then left.

REUNITED LATE AT NIGHT:

I called her at 11:45pm and she did not pick up. So then I texted her:

ME 2350: Just finished up, we on for that movie?

No response. I was thinking, "fuck, I just lost another one!" and was a bit annoyed that I chose to hang out with my friend rather than go for the lay. That didn't last long though, honestly I am now just not giving a fuck about women, there's just too much other stuff going on and it's becoming very low priority now, albeit a lot of fun.

But we went out to a gay bar (he's gay) and I hit on some of the girls there, and then we grabbed hookah since we were both feeling tired. My friend then wanted to split off and hook up with a guy, so I let him go at 2:30am and was having hookah by myself till 2:45am when I started walking towards the subway home.

And then, boom, she texted at just the right time:

HER 0250: I def fell asleep
HER 0250:
ME 0251: Yeah tired huh
HER 0252: Sorry
HER 0252: Well now I'm up
HER 0252: Lol

I called her, and asked her what happened - she was watching her TV show and fell asleep. I then said we should finish that show, I'll be there in ten minutes. Where does she live? She told me, then I told her to text me her apartment building and number and I'll be there. A few seconds later:

HER: <Address>
HER: Apt XXX

I just jumped in a cab and was there in ten minutes, texted her that I was in the elevator and showed up at her front door.

She was in PJs and a shirt, and I went to the bathroom to clean up and then got into bed with her. Put on a TV show while we sat together, I had already kissed her by this point, and then I started stripping down and went at it.

We actually didn't fuck until around 8:00am in the morning, because I was way in my head during every escalation attempt and couldn't get hard enough to fuck the girl - I was trying too hard and psyching myself out. We tried probably four or five times between 3:15am and 8:00am and took short naps in between. There was also one time where I was hard and had a condom on, but she thought I didn't have one on and wouldn't let me in her - so I lost concentration and focus and then my erection. She was a little embarrassed when she saw I already had it on. But finally, I got a condom on during morning wood around 8:00am, woke her up and without any foreplay I just entered her. I don't think she came but it was fun, only lasted 15 minutes or so and I enjoyed myself.

AFTERMATH:

Went and grabbed coffee with her in the morning from 9:00am until 9:45am, and then she walked me to my subway stop. Turns out she lives a bit of a double life, traveling South during the weekdays and then back to our city for the weekends. I joked that she can find two boyfriends like that. I also told her what I do and where I live.

Saw her again on Sunday night for a quick drink (was too tired to go home to fuck and also had an interview the next day) and have plans to meet up tonight.

Seppuku · Jul 22, 2016

Re: LR: Bumble N--------, 2016.07.15

Hey Grand Pooba,

Great initiative! I'm really curious to see how much you can learn a different style of seduction, once you already established your own style. Will be reading this!

Now on this LR, it's overall a great lay! I guess the "lovable dick" angle is in your lots of teasing, disagreeing, making shit up? Never mind, here are a few comments.

Grand Pooba said:
I wasn't sure where I'd be - I decided I could make time for an hour or so long informational date. It would be on my terms, and I would keep it at ideally 30 minutes, but definitely under one hour.

It's a great dating template. She grows excited, but then you let her know you'll have to leave soon. You're showing her you're not sold to her charms, you're a challenge, hard to get, fully in control, and leave her wanting for more. The only caveat is her expectations turning into disappointment or frustration, leading to auto-rejection, but you managed it well by offering the second drink.

I picked a table where we'd be sitting at a 90 degree angle to each other at a corner by the window. Solid choice.

My favorite positioning on-date. 90 degrees (like in restaurants), or side by side (in bars).

I've realized the importance of moving girls around, it just feels like more of a varied experience and it sets a better tone - you're having multiple events together which feel like something bigger.

my bet is, this second drink saved you from her auto-rejection.

We grabbed another sparkling red wine that were like $11 each (ugh!) but this time we were on barstools next to each other. Her posture was now mostly facing me and her leg was touching mine, and I was still facing the bar mostly, pretty aloof. She was also touching me, and I was also touching her a lot. We were laughing and having fun.

Like me, you're highly aware of the body language and physical contact. It's something I rarely see in the LRs here unfortunately. This underground, physical communication gives away huge clues about how well you're doing.

Also, your positioning is aloof, facing the bar, instead of facing her, "he doesn't like me" yet, still touching her a lot "he likes me". It keeps her guessing and creates a chase dynamics. I like to play with this, sometimes.

Example: I told her that I was actually really embarrassed about what I do - I'm homeless. Really? Yes, really, in fact I wanted to see her because it's really uncomfortable to sleep on hard ground, I'm hoping I have a bed to sleep on tonight. Sometimes I meet women and talk to them to find a bed for the night. She almost fell on the floor laughing. Embedded in this I think was a huge sexual frame.

Really loved it. Will see if I can use it too, LOL.

As we walked out we were holding hands, I told her maybe we should watch a movie later since she's not doing anything. She got excited and agreed. I told her I'd be out around 11:30pm, and I'd call her then. She tried to kiss me here and I deflected her to my cheek, then left.

And now you know you're in. Great job. She's thirsty for more, and chasing you. Good thing deflecting the kiss. Hard to get.

Looking forward to more posts!

Cheers,
Seppuku

Grand Pooba · Jul 23, 2016

Seppuku said:
Great initiative! I'm really curious to see how much you can learn a different style of seduction, once you already established your own style. Will be reading this!

Hey Seppuku! I think it's going to be building up on the whole skillset and being able to use the two styles concurrently. It seems to me that quite a few women respond really well to being kind of cocky and dominating, in a way. It feels like I am being completely shameless with them, a "don't care" attitude that's also fun.

Seppuku said:
It's a great dating template. She grows excited, but then you let her know you'll have to leave soon. You're showing her you're not sold to her charms, you're a challenge, hard to get, fully in control, and leave her wanting for more. The only caveat is her expectations turning into disappointment or frustration, leading to auto-rejection, but you managed it well by offering the second drink.

Ah now I see the impact and psychology behind this. I'll be more consciously making this happen. I think there's a narrow window to avoid autorejection.

Seppuku said:
my bet is, this second drink saved you from her auto-rejection.

Definitely.
I've found that if I don't get it right on the first date, I'll never see her again anyways. Most first dates of mine haven't gone anywhere this year, and I think what's missing is that sense of challenge and being hard to get, wanted. Value on the VAC curve. That's always been a big issue, but this whole challenging-but-interested vibe I created seemed to counteract that.

Seppuku said:
Like me, you're highly aware of the body language and physical contact. It's something I rarely see in the LRs here unfortunately. This underground, physical communication gives away huge clues about how well you're doing.

I think what's next is figuring out how to transition out of bad body language, if it's happening, and create good vibing at the right moments.

Seppuku said:
And now you know you're in. Great job. She's thirsty for more, and chasing you. Good thing deflecting the kiss. Hard to get.

Going to deflect the kiss more in the future. I've noticed if I kiss them it's game over.

Grand Pooba · Jul 23, 2016

LR-: CMB S------------, 2016.07.13

I hardly use dating apps (tinder, etc), my match rate is atrocious, maybe 5-10 matches a month. At the same time, I've been slowly figuring out how to do this properly for the few matches I do get.

Set Up:

This girl is Chinese from the mainland, works in Finance, hardly had information in her profile. Matched. Nice look. But the Coffee Meets Bagel app suggested intro said "I like jazz," and she had a sexy picture of her and a friend in black dresses on a staircase.

7.7

ME: Hey S--------, that's a sexy second pic. Jazz performance?
HER: Haha
HER: Thanks
HER: It was for a charity party
7.11
ME: Oh, that's cool, you must be a very generous person then
ME: Let's get off this silly app, hardly check it but I'd like to get to know you. Got a number or fb messenger?
7.13
<She sent this at 6:45am>
HER: xxx.xxx.xxxx

Switched to texting at 12:30p that day:

ME: Hi S---------, it's ------- from CMB. Let's grab a coffee or drink and get to know each other. How's your week?
HER: Hi Osama! It's been good. I'm actually more interested in architecture. Will you still want to meet?
ME: It's ------...not Osama. Good day.
HER: Sorry ---------
HER: Good day
ME: Free tonight?
HER: I have a work event. Maybe after 8
ME: Let me know when you're free after 8, if I'm free too we'll meet up.

Then I forgot about her.

At 6:15 I got a call from a mysterious number. It went something like this:

ME: Hello?
HER: Hey, it's S---------.
ME: Huh? Oh, hey, what's up.
HER: So I just finished work but I'm not going to my work event. I'm near <uptown>, are you done with work?
ME: Oh okay, yeah I'm almost done, you can meet me here then near <downtown>. We'll get coffee.
HER: Do you have a coffee place in mind?
ME: Yeah it's <coffee place>, but I'll text you.
HER: Can you text me the address please?
ME: Yeah cool, see you soon.

I texted her:

ME: <address>
ME: I have orange pants on.

I left twenty minutes later and texted her when I arrived:

ME: I'm here.
HER: 5-10 mins

Coffee, 6:50pm:

I happened to wearing an outfit almost exactly like below, but with no tie and a pinstripe white shirt. Orange pants.

She came up to me inside, gave me a hug, I was kind of quiet, we went to the front and she paid for my coffee, and then I led her to the back to sit on a couch together.

I used a totally different strategy than normal - an implementation of Hector's 24 Way to be a Lovable Dick article. I cursed, I disagreed with her, I didn't answer most of her questions about me or I made shit up.

She loved it, she was laughing constantly, and her body language matched mine.

At times she'd say something like "Oh my God I'm telling you so much about myself, let's talk about you! I want to learn about you!" I used to tell girls about myself a bit here and then switch back to talking about her. This time, every time she asked me that I'd either deflect it and change the subject back to her or something around the environment, or I'd make something up about myself on the spot while giving a non-answer - i.e. What do you do? I work a block away. What about you? I'm homeless, I'm unemployed, I just dress well so that I fit in with the real city folk, etc.

Also, my posture was different than normal - I saw a black guy with a sexy white girl in a club in DC a few weekends ago and just watched them while lounging out - I noticed his posture, and I also was watching how the was listening to her. It was them two sitting together on the same seat, but his legs were facing out in front of him while crossed over each other. The upper body facing to the girl to his side, with a slight lean into her but not too much, hands to the side facing her, and full attention with a blank expression with eyes. The eye contact was intense, totally focused, no smile or anything, just full, wide eyed focus.

So I copied this, but with more of a lean in so that my face is in plane with my knee cap:

129312226-portrait-of-young-man-sitting-on-chair-with-gettyimages.jpg

We talked about where she's from, how she ended up in New York, the kinds of friends she has and her roommate, what she does for fun, and through all this I'd guess ridiculous things about her. She said she's from a 2mil Chinese city, I told her that's just a town, she needs to check her facts. I told her I've lived her half a decade, she said six years confusing dozens and decades, and I inquired how she cheated her way through college to work in Finance if she doesn't even know basic math. When she asked me what I do, I told her I'm a boytoy, and she was floored laughing. She sometimes said she's gotten fat, I'd pinch her skin in her arm and stomach when she did and agree with her, then say "gotta work on that."

I'd say everything with a totally straight face too, sometimes while touching her in very sexual places like right above her ass while making a point. Once in a while I'd smile and look away when she laughed.

She found everything absolutely hilarious, was laughing constantly.

Move to my area; the waterfront park, 7:30pm:

After talking to her over coffee for about thirty minutes or so, I started talking about cool places where we have visited in the city. I then started talking about another neighborhood, and how there are cool spots abound there too - like one city for Korean food, another for fun bars, and a third where i live for it's waterfront. Then I prompted her: let's go see the waterfront in the third place and watch the sunset together! Now? Yes, right now, let's just go, the station is a block away. She was sold after thinking it over for ten seconds.

The subway ride was more quiet, I have gotta get used to being quiet around girls.

Read her hands and palms while sitting together, and then softly held hands.

When we got to the area I took her along the waterfront for a 15minute walk.

We started talking about sex and she got really excited, and reveals she's bisexual. I talked with her for like ten minutes about men, women, and sexuality and sexual views in America. Basically talking about sex, pleasure, people's attitudes, being open minded, and what people really think about sex here and elsewhere.

We sat on a pier at a waterfront park briefly, I led her around with my hands.

Move Home, 8:10pm:

I told her after showing her the waterfront that we should get drinks nearby, I know a nice chill place with good drinks a few blocks away. She agreed.

I was now slowly walking five blocks home, still haven't told her where I live or what I do for work.

At the first block she started to yawn, saying she is tired and asks how far away this bar is. Energy is waning, she's getting impatient.

Correctly recognized that the escalation window is closing.

So a few minutes later after some more silence and complaints that she's tired, I walk in my apartment building. "You live here? Aiya!" and then followed me up more alive and with a vibrant smile.

At Home into Morning, 8:20pm-7:30am:

We got home, I had her take off shoes and went to the bathroom. Came back, she said she's tired, I showed her a spicy beer I had in the fridge and we tried it. Moved her to my couch, and I could feel that she knew was was coming but also wasn't sure about it. Rather than go for the kiss I sat her down and talked to her for a few more minutes with my arm around her.

After about five minutes of us talking on the couch, I went for it. She dodges my kiss and I tried to manhandle, but she kept on moving back and just was sinking into the couch. I felt like I was a snake chasing her down, and she was compressing her body to maintain an inch between our lips and dodge the kiss.

Before I used to think of this as game over, and I would pull back and not escalate again and the girl would leave within a few minutes. But I wanted to try something new and I also felt a sexual tension there.

So I touched the inside of her left leg after pulling back slightly on my upper body and just looking at her with a smile. She didn't move or try to push me away. And then I moved my hand up her skirt and started touching her pussy. And she didn't move or try to push me away, she let me touch her pussy and started to relax. So then I started rubbing over her clit, and she started to sink into the couch and flipped into sex mode instead. After some time I pulled her panties a little bit out and actually started to finger her and play with her clit. She was soaking wet and moaning, very horny, yet was just laying back and enjoying it.

I picked her up and threw her on the bed and continued, and though she was moaning hard and moving her body like she's fucking, she wouldn't take off any clothes what so ever. Still getting fingered with my hand under her skirt and past her panties, which was very uncomfortable for both of us, but everytime I motioned to take off clothes or started doing it, she'd grab them and pull them back on while saying she didn't want to do anything. Sometimes used physical force, so I didn't push anything, and after she came once or twice we stopped.

I'd playfully make fun of her too when she said no, look at her with puppy eyes going "awwwww, why not?" and then resume escalating.

Right afterwards it was a little after 9:00pm, she was about to leave but I suggested she stay and watch a tv show with me. She was very tired, but agreed after I persisted a few times, I put on my tv and we got in bed and started to watch Batman The Dark Knight. Great film, but this girl just fell asleep in the first five minutes in my bed.

I tried escalating twice during the movie, but it was exactly like before.

Well eventually I just let her sleep in my bed with all her clothes on, and then when the movie ended she woke up around 11:30pm saying she wants to go home. I was doing work on my computer, so I told her she can go if she wants, or she can stay here for the night and go tomorrow. I handed her basketball shorts and a t shirt, and a toothbrush, and she went to the bathroom, came back and passed out.

I went to bed shortly after and tried escalating again, no avail. We were cuddling sleeping and she was holding my hands, very close, but every time I went to escalate and take off her panties she'd stop me. This was a really bad cycle.

By the morning she was just in her panties and otherwise naked, soaking wet, moving with my cock hard over her pussy and feeling it, motioning it in place, but still wouldn't move her panties past the point of us fucking and would resist hard. "I just don't want to," and in the morning I asked her "awww, why are you so cold to me? I know you're a horny devil and you love sex, and you clearly want it now," when she got quiet, thought, and replied "I think I like someone else." Anyway, I was quiet for a minute and then smiled, said "Well, I'm not going to try to steal you from someone else, but we're still enjoying each other right now and I like you." Still no dice.

We grabbed coffee in the morning as late as I could, but while we were cuddling before getting up to change I told her a few things that she laughed about:

ME: I like hanging out with you, you're a lot of fun, but something tells me you're the kind of girl that disappears.
HER: Hahahaha, I might be like that.
ME: Haha such a player! Well I hope we see each other again, and if we don't that's too bad.
HER: Okay, maybe.

Then we went out and grabbed coffee nearby, holding hands on the walk. Over coffee talked more about where she lives and her work, and also talked about her bisexuality. She loves women but could never be sexual with only a woman. We talked about threesomes, agreed that it would be tough to do one because of everything happening between people, but very fun.

At coffee I again said:

ME: Well S-------, I enjoyed the night, and I hope I see you soon.
HER: Umm, maybe we'll hang out soon, maybe another day not so soon, maybe we will, maybe we won't, yes, no, who knows! Hahaha.
ME: Wow, I didn't realize you're so decisive!
HER: Hahaha.

Sent her on her way with a lyft. She didn't really want to kiss at the end, despite holding hands.

<Some bad frame control above, it seems.>

Texting Thursday:

ME: Glad we got to know each other a little bit, S-----------, fun architecture talks
HER: Haha
ME: Good ferry?
HER: Yea I like it
ME: Have you ever been to a DJ boat party?
HER: No
ME: They leave one block from your place, I'm going to two this weekend. Super fun, imagine a club on a boat seeing the sights at sunset. Come with me to one.
HER: Nice Have fun without me

Fucked this up. Pretty cold.

What I should have done is, rather than describe it to her, ask her "free Sat or Sun eve?" and if she replied yes to one of those, I'd say, "Cool, we're going Saturday/Sunday."

Gotta match a girl's texts better - mine were way too long, I caught this too late.

----

Good:

- Not giving a fuck with a woman is way, way, wayyyy more fun than being a nice, accommodating guy. I love disagreeing with a girl, I love making fun of her when she screws something up (this girl is in finance but confused the values of dozens and decades - I teased her mercilessly all night that she doesn't know math even though she has a Masters), and I love pinching her skin when she asks if she's fat.
- The unique thing about our coffee time was I was saying assholey things that made her laugh, but with a totally straight, blank expression. Sometimes I'd crack a statement and smile to myself a little bit as she laughs (it's pretty fun and funny) but being quiet is also something to do more of.
- Have noticed sometimes I take this overboard and push her into autorejection, need to calibrate that line.
- Still trying to understand better how to balance my desire for a girl (and thus leading her along the process) while not giving a fuck about the girl (and thus being outcome independent and an asshole).

Bad:

- The main issue here was the incongruency in my behavior - because I was at home rather warm and chill, as opposed to the cocky, ridiculous and dominant person I was early on, she didn't trust me and she wasn't turned on.
- This girl was hoping that I'd behave in a more dominating fashion, like I see in a lot of Oh Pry's reports. Basically she wanted to fuck the dominant asshole, and at home I became a laid back warmer guy.
- I have to be congruent until after we sleep together.
- Better escalation technique needed

Grand Pooba · Jul 27, 2016

FU: CMB R---------, 2016.07.24

This date basically careened into disaster - and I've been here before, too. I could probably copy and paste some of these things from other reports, so that tells me that either I'm not learning, or that I wasn't in the right headspace to make the right decisions and calls.

I did want to use this as another foray to explore being an asshole and experiment with it, but I am also seeing the limitations of this style - there's a big risk of pushing too far and the girl auto rejecting. In this case I definitely went too far and instead of it being fun, it became mean and hurtful.

Interesting...so early this year girls auto rejected from lack of value and being too nice aka Friend Zoning, and this time it's from being too much of a jerk. Lol. Just bouncing around the sweet spot.

CMB MATCH AND SET UP:

I was playing around on CMB on Saturday during the day, I was really bored. Got a match from a late 20's Filipina girl who had just recently moved here. Had a pretty lengthy and detailed profile <this should have been a hint as to what kind of meeting this would be> and I saw she had a picture of her and a friend where she looked a solid foot taller.

ME: Hey R------, second pic, you must be really tall to dwarf over your friend like that.
HER: Hi GP, not really...I cheated.
HER: I was wearing 3 inch platforms
HER: Haha
ME: Oh, cheating! That's how you got through uni and made it here...isn't it...
HER: Oh.. now that's judging
HER: I'm a nerd.. so no.. I didn't cheat.
ME: I know, aren't judgmental people the worst? They suck!
ME: Especially when they make fun of smart asses.
HER: Hmmm.. so which of the two are you?
HER: =D
ME: Maybe all of the above? Lol it's a gorgeous day. .
ME: Let's grab coffee, are you in the city?
HER: Yes, I'm in the city.
HER: But I already have plans today
HER: Maybe tomorrow?
ME: I might be busy tomorrow. But...let's get off this silly app. What's your number?
HER: xxx.xxx.xxxx

Switched to texting:

ME: Hey R---------, it's GP from CMB. Where in the city are you, anyway? I'm bouncing around tomorrow.
HER: Hi, i'm at <neighborhood>.
ME: Cool, if i wind up around there tomorrow I'll let you know. What plans do nerds have... textbook parties?
HER: Okay, wow.. that's just mean.
HER: We have trivia parties too! =P
ME: Yes. Judgemental, mean, all of the above . Hm, and you win every time, don't you...
HER: Yeah.. because i cheat in trivia. I'm not good at it.
ME: Wow, you cheat off your friends too? That's just....wow.
ME: I should be worried about you.
HER: Oh yeah.. that's what friends are for.
ME: Right??
HER: Yeah, you probably should.
ME: Ooooo oooo ooo a daily cheater!
ME: Anyway I gotta run. Text you later.
HER: Okay. Ttyl

Anyway, this was a pretty fun setup - I could play off a couple of angles on this and have fun instantly when we see each other.

MEET:

On Sunday, I messaged her around 3:00pm in the afternoon when I was more certain of what my plans were going to be like:

ME: Hey R-----------, I'm gonna be in the <park> area in a couple hours. You still free?
HER: Yup
HER: Where in <park>?
ME: Lets grab drinks or coffee, where in the <neighborhood> are you?
ME: Walking around with friends.
HER: Okay, i'm at XXX Street but anywhere in <neighborhood> is fine

ME: Headed to the <museum>, so let's meet around 5:45 at XXX/YYY.
HER: Okay

Finally, fifteen minutes before 5:45, I texted her again:

ME: Headed there now. Meet you at the NE corner.
HER: Okay.. going there now too..

I showed up and was standing in the shade, she showed up five minutes later. She was dressed in jean shorts, a blue/white airy top and a teal blue hairband. Pretty cute, didn't work out though - skinny fat.

Immediately there was a fun, joking vibe. I teased her that she looked nice, even though she probably stole that outfit from her friend. I built on it and asked her what else she cheated her friend out of. Then she asked if I'm from Jersey and proceeded to make fun of me about this. I joked that she's new in town from the Philippines and she doesn't even know her own neighborhood! She said she had moved here just two months ago, and NYC for ten months.

NOTE: OK, so this was very telling, in fact. I think the whole date template I had set up was wrong...I could have probably gone for something with this girl a lot faster if I didn't pick this place and just kept moving around with her in the vicinity of her apartment, while finding out where it is.

NOTE 2: This was also a moment to tone the asshole back a little bit and deep dive. I think that's the transition point - once a girl lowers her guard and is fun and open.

I talked about grabbing coffee, then mentioned there's only chain stuff here. She said all the local stuff is two blocks away (this turned out to be where she lives). But I followed the plan I originally decided - to grab drinks just four blocks up, but still within a short walking distance of her place.

NOTE 3: I made logistics difficult for myself by not listening to her clues and cues.

At this point out body language was very positive, I was guiding her by the small of her back, and she was laughing and walking really close to me. I was still being a really big asshole at this point.

When we sat down I picked barstools at 90s with a table facing the window, to watch out.

She was basically holding my hand at this point, her body language was very open. I probably could have just walked to her house, but I wasn't thinking.

Instead I spent the next half hour or so deep diving her while picking her apart. She seems like a smart girl who could hold her own, but I could also feel the vibe going downhill. I missed the escalation window.

We talked about her move from the Philippines, how she's here on her own and her whole family is back there. She's a banker, so we joked about her crying in front of her boss. She said she was crying a lot at times because her work is tough, so I called her a crybaby and laughed.

NOTE 4: I think when I deliver these kinds of assholey remarks, it only works when it's said with a very sarcastic and straight face. Almost like I'm being dead serious, but I have a slight smirk to it.

I actually read her palm, and I predicted that one of her lines meant she's very sexual. However, to this she was defiant - she said she's not sexual at all. I told her that it really sucks, because sex is really fun and most women enjoy it. That's just too bad. She kept playing into it - she hates sex - which I totally did not expect her to do. I should have just said "I highly doubt that" and switched topics, but instead I ended up talking about more sexuality in terms of the US culture. It didn't really go anywhere.

In retrospect, I realize that I didn't really deep dive her - most of our conversation was very surface and me kind of going down the same cycles of insults about her cheating, not knowing anything, and crying and being helpless. I should have deep dived as well and then interplayed this with some sexuality and asshole remarks. I didn't share anything about myself.

As we went on and her vibe was getting more cold, there were increasing periods of weird silence. One I remember, I just started out the window, bored, until she started talking again after 20 seconds. Another time, she pulled out her phone and started texting, so I poked her in the stomach and got her attention again, and we started talking and she put away her phone.

I told her that I did need to go meet up with my friends (a girlfriend and her friend whom I split up from) and that I should probably go find them. But...I'm enjoying drinks with her and she's fun, we should continue and go check out Second Avenue where all the local coffee shops are. She was down, we split the bill.

MOVE #2 AND PULL ATTEMPT:

We walk out of the restaurant.

Turn the block and start walking towards where she lives, and about halfway down the block as we're talking I start holding her hands. She complied with this and actually started walking closer to me.

So seemed a little promising - is a recovery possible? I had probably affected her esteem a little bit by this point. There was more silence, and we're still talking.

Missed the window long, long ago.

I stopped at the bank for a second, to get some cash. Decided that maybe I should add another element and move her around some more, seeking compliance. She got a call from a friend while I was getting cash, and I overheard something being really bad. I didn't know what to think - she's following me around and everything, but the vibe also felt really off.

After her call, I asked her about it - I said if she needs to talk to her friend, she totally can. In a little while, she said - I told her I'm on a date. And I asked if it's going well with a wink, and she just smiled and laughed.

We were fast approaching the exact intersection where she lives, about one block away now, a 2 minute walk. It was time to either switch locations or try to pull. I did both. And met a lot of resistance.

ME: Let's grab a coffee, do you know a good place around here?
HER: Oh I don't know if coffee is a good idea, I have to be up early tomorrow.
<The time is only 7:00pm and it's completely daylight out, so this is pretty much utter bullshit.>
ME: Haha, yeah right! Where do you drink coffee around here, anyway?
HER: What do you mean?
ME: Well, since this is your neighborhood and you're a big coffee drinker, you must know all the spots.
HER: Oh, no, actually I make my own coffee.
ME: Oh yeah, how do you do that?
HER: Well, I buy my beans downtown, and I have a french press, and I make it at home.
ME: So, you never go out and get it.
HER: Nope!
ME: Hmmm...well, hey, why don't we try your coffee.
HER: Haha...no. <She smiled and looks away as she says this.>
ME: No?
HER: No.

I don't know what happened here....I had an unsettling feeling in my gut that this whole thing fell off the tracks much earlier and I had already pushed her into feeling bad about me. So I did something I've never done before...I walked off.

I simply let go of her hand, started walking a little bit faster than her while she was at the same pace.

I then turned my head to hear and waved, said "byyyyyyeee" with a smirk and looked at her. She was walking, but also slowing down almost to a stop, said "bye!" and looked at me with a face I haven't seen. Basically a face that said "is this really happening?" but at the same time it also had a hint of "oh, he just left..." just very shocked, and I didn't look back again. I maintained pace and walked to the subway.

It was only 7:00pm.

I felt really shitty about this afterwards, about two hours later when I linked up again with my visiting girlfriend and her friend. Even now, I feel a bit broken down - that instead of creating a mutual and fun experience I just created an encounter we're both going to look back on as an utter failure, a mess, a horrible time. We didn't move towards pleasure, we moved far, far away from it.

LESSONS:

- Pushed her into virtual auto rejection in about thirty minutes, even though she was sticking around and still following my lead, maybe out of politeness but I'm not sure.

- There seems to be a limit to this cocky asshole style. And that limit is....be a douchebag until she actually opens up and starts being very girly and feminine, and then I should reward her with attention and deep diving, at least until the next test. If I do it while she's actually being open to me, it hurts and she will turn cold quickly.

- For girls who are more down to earth and maybe more in the boyfriend market (as indicated by profile length) I should either commit all the way to ultra fast seduction by leading-leading-leading while being a funny asshole, or I should mix it up with genuine conversation and being a funny asshole only in limited doses.

- I need to get more cognizant of my headspace, because it is really affecting my decision making. Perhaps even meditating into the meet up before hand would be a good idea. I don't even know if I can do this, to be perfectly honest - my ego is really overpowering and I'm pretty fucking moody. It's always been that way.

- My gut instincts told me I should try to just pull this girl straight home, and I didn't listen to them and instead picked a more standard date out of caution. This was a poor call.

- Would sticking around have helped? Was this actually a test instead?

fog · Jul 27, 2016

Hello! I love how detailed and interesting your posts are.

I can sense the pain and otherwise bad feelings in your most recent post. You were teasing her about the same things repeatedly, especially cheatimg right? As a rule of thumb I never tease a girl about the same thing more than twice, otherwise it starts to feel more like nagging and it gets stale.

Grand Pooba · Aug 4, 2016

backstory said:
I can sense the pain and otherwise bad feelings in your most recent post. You were teasing her about the same things repeatedly, especially cheatimg right? As a rule of thumb I never tease a girl about the same thing more than twice, otherwise it starts to feel more like nagging and it gets stale.

Well said, back story! I will move on quickly after I tease a girl about something just once or twice.

Grand Pooba · Aug 4, 2016

FR: Boat Party, 2016.07.30

One of my favorite things to do in my city is to go to the summertime sunset boat cruises. Promoters bring in local or international DJs and rent out a tour boat for the evening, where you're just riding around on the water for four or five hours through the sunset and early evening, from 6-10pm - dancing, seeing the sights, and socializing/drinking/smoking. A club on water. I went to three this year, and I go to the ones that play house music DJs I like.

For seduction, this environment is a hybrid between social circle and club game - because it's a boat and you can't actually pull a girl off a boat until it docks, and because you see the same people over and over for four hours recognizing each other by the end of the night, it's very important to build a high value social vibe during the ride. Zero blowouts or negativity - to be aggressive here looks bad. In the last two hours or so pick the correct target and isolate her on or off the dance floor, or pick up a girl who's still alone at the very end of the night as the boat empties out.

Pros:
- Lots of single and very attractive women that are pretty easy to pick off and talk to, from all the groups and couples.
- Quite a few girls come by themselves.
- Lots of places to move women around - the dance floor, the bar area, the upper deck, the lower deck front or back of the boat, and all the sides with outdoor walkways.
- Very cool views, setting, and music.
- A lot of tourists come to these, sometimes on their own or with their friends.

Cons:
- Four hour boat ride from about 6-10pm. Nowhere to pull until the boat docks - can't do a typical 15-30 minute club meet and leave.
- Bathrooms are always crowded, not really an option to fuck.
- Very easy to blow out on the boat - because it's the same people everyone recognizes everyone by the end of the ride. Everyone is watching you, so it's very important to only have good experiences with everyone, so that you don't look bad and reduce social value on the boat.
- Pretty high competition. Favorable ratios but everyone on these seems to be super good looking and very socially calibrated.

The first one I went to this year was with a gf, so there was no need to approach anyone.
Second boat cruise, I was far too aggressive and totally blew out on every approach after a while.
Third boat cruise, I started to figure it out - and I almost pulled a girl early on but blew out my vibe in the last two hours or so after getting a bit too drunk. The girl who was incredibly into me was swooped up by another guy after I had already built a solid seduction.
Fourth boat cruise - well, that's here. And I almost got it.

FAILED PULL:

At the very end of the night, I was doing pretty terrible - I had built a great vibe on the boat and people knew me and had fun - but was alone and I didn't know what to do, and every girl I had talked to over the night had eventually left. In the last thirty minutes, I was sniping - trying to talk to as many girls as I could in the dance floor area as quickly as I could. But, I was using the wrong conversational style - it was more of a datey get-to-know-her conversation rather than (in retrospect) a more aggressive or sexual type of conversation that would get her turned on and ready to dance with me or go home with me. Naturally, every girl moved and left after a few minutes of this, and I was still alone.

Need to figure this part out - more body language, less talking.

But, about five minutes away from the boat docking and the whole thing being over, I noticed that there seemed to be one place that night particularly conducive to meeting people - and that was the corridors that wrapped around the boat and allowed people to move between the bar/dance area inside, and the views, lower and upper outside decks. In fact, the two doors between these that led to stairwells were extremely high traffic areas, and just by hanging around here earlier in the night was where I met the most people. Girls would pass by as you're standing there and it was really easy to open them without moving. I was also wearing a very sexy zebra print shirt - I've never received so many compliments in my life.

I saw that in this area some of the other people I'd met were chatting up women, so I went to check it out for myself. And lo and behold, I ran into Julie - one of the sexiest girls I had talked to all night. About two hours earlier, another guy wearing a black and white polka dotted jacked singled me out to take some pictures. P - we were chatting, when the rest of his group found him too - a guy with long hair S and a girl, J-------. I was introduced to J------ and S as them being together. So I talked to S and P and we were joking around that J-------- stood out from us because she was wearing this white dress with New Mexico Navajo patterns. There was a bit on that.

This girl was fucking beautiful - blond, blue eyed, very fit body and wearing a dress that showed off her entire back and a tiny tattoo (lol).

I didn't really talk to her much then - made a comment about her dress, but she was laughing at how I was interacting with the guys.

Well, when I saw her at the end she was sitting down watching the view of the city, while P was further down talking to another girl and S was nowhere in sight. There was another guy talking to Julie but she saw me and screamed out my name, got really excited and I just HAD to come talk to her. She was practically jumping out of the seat.

I sat to her left, and with her the vibe was VERY sexual. This girl wanted me so hard - in the next five minutes at various times this girl gave me a hug, looked at me with sex eyes, put her head on my lap, wrapped one of her legs around one of my legs, was hip-to-hip with me as we were sitting, and touched me whenever she could. And I reacted too by touching her back and grabbing my arm around her waist and pulling her close.

NOTE: So many opportunities here to make chase frames that I did not take advantage of. I'm not certain if I need to be making such remarks overtly, when I could just do the same thing with my own touch. Need to calibrate to the right strategy here - more sex talk, or more touching/physicality.

It was very physical. And the boat was now literally docking.

I probed her a little bit interspersed with some conversation - where is she from? what is she doing here? Isn't she with S, her boyfriend? Well, it turns out she's actually visiting town this weekend from Europe and she met S in Texas six months ago, and calls him a friend. And it seems like she saw him as a friend-friend, nothing more. She was planning to go to an after event later with them, and she had a hotel room about a half hour away.

I told her I'm going to an after party later, we should both link up.

She was totally down. I told her she should text me right now. And she was taking out her phone and about to put my number in, when the security guards come to kick everyone off on our side.

Shit. She put her phone away and we walked off together hand in hand. But - then I remembered I had left a bag in the main dance area hidden away - I broke off from her and told her to meet me outside off the boat.

I thought - the way to do this would have to be making it very clear - since she's with her other guy friends, I should invite her to an after party, but tell her to text me her name and number and I'll get in touch with her later on. Thoughts?

Well, I went and got my bag and then got off the boat with a lot of other people.

Talked to some other girl in line, but then I saw her leaning against a white post to my right. She saw me and made a really fun laugh expression like she was super excited to see me and having a great time. I just walked straight up to her. Started talking and flirting again. But, I wasn't thinking here....

What I SHOULD have done is get her number immediately and continue where we left off, with instructions, and then disappear saying that I have to run home (I didn't have logistics). Text her at 1am or so and see where she is.

OR

I could have just grabbed her hand and started walking with her down the pier to where all the taxis are, saying let's wait for her friends out over there so that she can link up with them.
This would have been dominantly leading and very physical, and I could just tell her to meet me later near the after party or whatever.

But....instead, she asked where her friends are, and I had seen them earlier by the boat a little away, so I led us there.

And of course met P and S. I started chatting with the latter a bit, but he noticed J-------- flirting hard with me, and started getting jealous. It was interesting....he was trying to look after her, but she kept turning to me and leaning on me, and I started talking to him a bit. He walked off a little after that.

J------- and I then looked at each other, and in a split second our foreheads touched and we looked like each other like about to kiss and really wanting to. But he also both hesitated.

NOTE: This seems to be a good example of keeping the tension instead of kissing - where your foreheads meet, but then disengage. It definitely felt leading up to the kiss. I kiss girls far too often too soon.

But I knew we're with her friends now. So I said in a very low voice "I know, we can't right now with your friends here...." and we disengaged while keeping eye contact. About five seconds later, S came back around me. He was definitely feeling a little jealous, and said something like that. "J---- are you okay?" "Yes, I'm great. Isn't he gorgeous?" Referring to me.

I finally remembered why I was still there - to trade fucking numbers! She pulled her phone out, kept misspelling and so I typed it in her phone - it was weird to work it, but I *thought* I got it. She sent a text in front of me, we talked for another couple minutes, and then I bid farewell to everyone. Walked off. Security was making us move again too.

Well, it turns out I typed in the wrong number or something - because I never got her text! And I was like...god damn it. Fucked that up!

A bad process that could have been much improved.

Lessons:
- I need better tech and mindsets for pulling girls.
- Isolate the girl as much as possible, rather than leading her straight to her guy friends. Foolish and obvious. I should have led her off the pier to wait somewhere else - keep moving the girl around and isolating her.
- Probably could have just fucked her on the pier behind some kind of building, honestly. Since she was so horny. Better instinct for that.
- Get her number sooner or have her text me sooner. Double and triple check that I put in the right number.
- Hanging out in a high traffic area is a good low maintenance way to get results and situational openers.
- Better conversational or dance ability.
- Go for numbers much sooner. Then continue the experience.
- Shotgun approaching at the end of the night looks bad. I should isolate a girl by the 60 min to dock mark and dance with her.

Grand Pooba · Aug 15, 2016

I had a crazy night in Los Angeles that was also a crazy learning opportunity. I landed at 9:00pm on Saturday evening from Portland, my buddy Nate picked me up and we drove to his sister’s place (where he lives) in the West Side. He told me about his neighbor Pat who we’re going out with later on at night, I catch up with Nate and we smoke some weed before I shower and get ready to head out at 10pm.

Nate is my old neighborhood friend from back east, who moved to LA this summer and is living the life. He’s 21, a male model, and is a total natural who fucks girls constantly - at least a new girl every week.

Since moving to Los Angeles he’s totally killed it, apparently going out and pulling pussy all the time. He’s also really good looking, in very good shape, and has this very fun playful don’t give a fuck vibe about him. Girls love Nate, and I’ve learned a bit from him myself. This was the latest experience.

At 10:00pm we bounce to Pat’s house next door. Pat is this hugely buff dude who’s about 5’8” and all I know about Pat is that he’s also a natural and pulls a new girl every single night he goes out. I also meet Marco, his roommate. Marco is also a very buff guy but seemed very chill, always smiling and just had this charismatic quiet allure to him. It felt very in control, safe, and just low key fun.

My mind was about to be blown.

We all took a round of shots and then went out to three different spots between 10:30 and 2:00am bar closing, all in the west side around Venice and Marina Del Rey. Nate and Pat and I walked to the first spot, I was pretty quiet being mostly high but I got to listen to Pat and Nate talk. At the first spot we met two of their friends, Liam and someone else. Liam has a girlfriend but was cool, and other guy seems like an average Joe.

I’ve never seen a group of predators like this, but on our night out we were a predatory force. Pat split off at some point and went to hook up with one of his exes at the very end of the night, but besides that everyone was working the crowd wherever we went. We didn’t even try to hide it - the main guys Pat and Nate would walk into a place and strategize, and it was very operational. Before when I’ve gone out with guys it’s been way more chill, more about just having fun in the group. In this case, it was about slaying pussy.

I hung around with the guys, mainly Nate, and approached when I could. We all ran into Marco at some point who was chill, but also met some blonde girl with tattoos who seemed really into him with an hour to go. They already seemed like they were together for a long time, a couple who were just going out, but I learned from Nate that he just met her. This is the power of the fucking natural.

At bar close between 1:30am and 2:15am I went outside and talked to a bunch of girls, and got two numbers that I wanted to set up to bring to an afterparty but only one of them texted me back. These two girls I met on an approach by the bar earlier in the night - two girls visiting from Stanford and obviously looking for dick. In fact, every girl at the place was looking for a cock. But I digress - I texted one of the girls like so:

I also flirted for a while with this bitchy Korean girl - the real target was her friend who looked like a Hawaiian Filipino, but I was talking to the Korean being an asshole while she was grilling me. Almost got her number but she declined in the end - I think I wasn’t focused enough on just having fun and not giving a fuck.

On the walk to the uber I was alone chasing down Nate and I happened to run into them. I saw them suddenly and was like “oh, hey! funny running into you, where are you two headed?” I then invited them with me to the afterparty by saying that we’re having one down the street. The girls looked at each other with smiles and were *almost* sold, but I think I pushed too much or my vibe was just off and they instead told me to text them. Which is a soft rejection, but anyway I sent the address and they never came.

So now we end up back at the afterparty at Pat/Marco’s house. It’s me, Nate, Marco, Marco’s girl, Nate’s sister (who he lives with) and the two other dudes Liam and his buddy. We’re doing shots, weed, and lines of coke. Then suddenly a new party joins in - it’s the Asian girls! The Korean, Hawaiian, and a guy-girl couple. Wow, the night has taken a turn, and it’s around 2:30am.

With this new influx a new dynamic is starting to form, and I hang back until the Korean girl notices me. We split off and started talking. However, my conversation was pretty serious and boring at this time, and in the back of my mind I was also fixated on how to work this situation to get the girls alone in isolation. I failed to realize a few openings with the Hawaiian girl (who is actually Japanese) and she was rather quiet, open and flirting just enjoying herself.

We all take more shots as a group, I see that Marco’s girl is talking to me periodically but also being very flirty and physical with Marco without him trying all that hard. Korean girl is in and out with me. I got up to grab water once and the Japanese girl also got up to follow me - passed me twice but I DID NOT ENGAGE HER. Big mistake - I forgot what was happening.

At some point Korean girl (named Jane), Japanese girl (named My), Nate, Liam, Liam’s friend and myself all move outside to smoke cigs. Nate splits off with My to go sit on a bench, and the others stay in a different area. Liam and his friend eventually go inside leaving me to chat with Jane. We’re talking one on one, I grab two chairs after five minutes and we sit facing 90 talking about travel and life. It was a conversation that wasn’t light nor sexual.

Suddenly there is a massive shift in energy in everyone. I get up and tell Jane we should go inside to go get some weed, and she complies and follows, and when I go do this Nate and My get up and quietly start walking to Nate’s place next door. Inside, Marco, his girl and Nate’s sister are all vining cozy, and they’re all getting ready to go to Marco’s room. I see all this happen right in front of my eyes and have an “oh shit” moment, like “is this really happening?” Totally caught me off guard - and apparently Jane too, because she’s visibly uncomfortable and is asking Marco where everyone went. He tells us that they’re tired and they’re going to go back to sleep. Jane tries to find her friend Nate’s sister Megan - who was already in Marco’s room. She’s super confused as to what’s going on.

Well, I knew I had to pull and only had one place to pull to - so I took Jane under the premise that we’re getting some more weed to smoke - back to Nate’s apartment where he was with My.

Nate and his sister live in a three floor apartment - the very top floor has a bedroom, second floor is a study, and main level is a living room and kitchen where I was staying.

I bring Jane to the living room, but she hears rustling upstairs and yells out. Nate and My peek over the balcony, she loudly starts calling them while remaining very distant from me. And this felt like the beginning of the end. My and Nate came down - quiet, obviously interrupted in their hook up - and Jane starts to get very talkative apparently oblivious to everything.

I was in a mind state now that could be best described as paranoid and uncomfortable. I think my mind had set itself into a “flight” mode, where I had to try and fix the situation and hook up with Jane. Instead when I should have been thinking that girls are just silly and cute, and I should just have fun and enjoy everything happening. But my whole demeanor, I was visibly uncomfortable that this wasn’t going my way.

But Nate and My are clearly being flirty, only that when I try to flirt with Jane or touch her she is very, very closed off and won’t comply with anything that I ask. Won’t sit next to me, won’t even hand me a glass of water. Somewhere earlier in line I had fucked up, or just chosen a bad woman. This virtually continued the whole time till they left, but the vibe was the girls being very flirty and comfortable with Nate, and him talking and letting the conversation be very light and fun, while at the same time engaging both.

My at times was engaging with me, though. She even came at one point to sit next to me and talk to me while touching me a bunch - this girl definitely wanted some cock and was in her 30’s, probably would have been down for the threesome. When she came and talked to me we held hands briefly. She was still complying with me and even though she was more attracted to Nate I could also feel her giving me the time of day. But, I knew Nate also wanted her and so I didn’t make any further moves for this girl - I let her go and was instead too fixated in my head about how to resolve this stall for our whole group. Didn’t see another possibility of me hooking with My and Nate with Jane.

Jane was through the night getting more and more testy, and started to really grill me and get bitchy, over things like my fashion and what I was wearing that night, as well as how I refused to tell her where I’m from if not LA. She also brought up polyamorous lifestyles at some point, and said I couldn’t possibly be into that stuff (LOL) but I didn’t say anything and just shut up. I guess she assumed that I must be very inexperienced and naive. We all did more coke, weed, and drank a little more, but more or less Nate and My felt like a unit and I had to manage Jane who was always loud and non-compliant with everything I said or requested. They moved around together sometimes, and I moved with My too once in a while but my vibe was far too forced and unnatural, Nate just didn’t care and was having fun.

In closing I was on the couch with My to my left playing with Nate’s sister’s Chihuahua, and Nate to her other side watching TV, and Jane standing off to the side watching the tv and playing with her phone.

Jane feigned them getting and Uber and they both left disappointed in about two minutes. My only gave Nate a hug and waved bye to me, Jane waved bye to Nate and didn’t even wave bye to me.

Anyway, the girls left at 5:00am, Nate motioned with his finger not to talk at all when they left, we chilled and Megan came back at 5:15am and Nate and I learned that they just went straight back to Marco/Pat’s place to try and see if anything was going on. Then we learned through texting that the Japanese girl went to another dude in the group who lives in the neighborhood and probably hooked up. Good for them though. I passed out around 6:00am after chilling with Nate and his sister - who kept denying she had a threesome with Marco. Lol.

With the effect of drugs and alcohol that night, and with such a near failure that I was so mentally invested in yet beat down by, I honestly felt so dejected and defeated - just like an utter failure, and I wanted to drop my head down and cry. Nate, on the other hand, was just like “oh well” and kept enjoying himself anyway.

Nate broke down a lot of things with me the morning after, but one thing was clear - I was affected by something that he completely didn’t care for, at all. It was beneath his worry, and ultimately he was able to listen to and act on his gut instincts while I was not and instead became uncomfortable and psyched out. We also concluded that we should have communicated and pulled each other aside - and traded girls. I could have probably closed with My (Japanese girl) and Nate could have worked Jane (Korean girl) or we could have just focused on having a threesome with My and either of us could have initiated that.

Thoughts:

-What a night! Keep having nights like this too - where there are clear set ups for slaying pussy. I’m really, really close to cracking the code.
-I am not listening to my natural instinct. Nate thinks I need to step away from game and all PUA type learning and start to hone in on my natural, sexual instincts. I realize that they are there hidden within, and I’m not following them 100% because I’m too caught up in thinking rather than feeling out the moment.
-When going out and at any moment, I should only be focused on making friends and having a good time, and nothing more.
-Great to be able to hang out with guys that pull girls like this. Marco has probably been with close to 1000 women. I see again that I have a long way to go to improve, and yet it feels cool to hang out with guys on this level.
-I psyched myself out. I couldn’t see all the possibilities in the moment - including a possible threesome with the Japanese girl.
-Lately have noticed that I think the fear of success is actually what’s stalling me. Like here, how I knew I wanted the Japanese girl but also didn’t really move towards it.
-Girls are Silly and Cute. Girls are Silly and Cute. Need to make this a fucking mantra - as soon as I start to enjoy women in every moment and don’t worry about anything process related, I start winning.
-Honestly, after everything happened I wanted to break down and cry. I have not felt like such a failure ever, and this missed opportunity really burned me inside - and yet I shouldn’t be taking this so hard to heart and so tough, because a real winner. It’s the difference between me and Nate - I can’t let this loss go, but he didn’t even give two shits that he didn’t sleep with either girl. It really didn’t matter at all, and it doesn’t - why should I let two random girls from a night in LA in a situation I’ve never been in affect my esteem? I think the feeling is that I can't keep up with the naturals.
-Create value in the group and also for the girl. If my truth is eternal love then I should always be focusing out, raising the experience and having fun in the moment for everyone. In fact, with this group it was all about getting everyone in it laid together.
-Endless possibilities to get laid. This kind of experience seems to be happening consistently once a week.

PrettyDecent · Aug 17, 2016

Hey Os,

Wow man, what a crazy night indeed!

You have some awesome friends in LA. Those type of friends are the ones that helped me reach a new level.

Here's what I think happened:

You started right off the bat with low attainability with Jane. If it's because you were being an asshole or she was jealous of your attraction to My, I don't know.

Then they came to your party. My definitely wanted to get laid. Jane probably also expected to get laid. My was going to be easier though, because your attainability was better.

Either way, you don't show interest in either of the girls.

This is very, very important - you deep dive Jane and started racking more compliance from her. Jane's increasingly relying on you for a good time (she doesn't know anybody else at the party, and My's paired up, so you're her only guide), and you're not giving her good emotions. That's because you're not showing interest and the vibe is too heavy. You need more humour in your interaction. Your friends vibe was perfect - follow exactly as they do.

Anyway, Jane feels how everybody else in the party is connecting. Emotionally and sexually.

So now she feels alone and insecure at this party. So she starts lashing out at you (which is what most people do if they're feeling insecure). She also may see you as the cause of this, and so she's particularly disrespectful to you.

The remedy is this: show more interest, and use more humour. This is particularly important to balance out your new asshole vibe.

Anyway, you're getting these girls attracted to you! Now just show them you're attracted back. This article will show you how to do that - https://www.girlschase.com/content/showi ... keeping-it

Nick

Grand Pooba · Aug 22, 2016

PrettyDecent said:
You started right off the bat with low attainability with Jane. If it's because you were being an asshole or she was jealous of your attraction to My, I don't know.

Then they came to your party. My definitely wanted to get laid. Jane probably also expected to get laid. My was going to be easier though, because your attainability was better.

Either way, you don't show interest in either of the girls.

Nick you nailed it man! This is exactly what happened - somewhere in there I should have determined that My was more attracted to me than Jane was, and on some level I could definitely tell - Jane had a talkative and friendly vibe with me, but My had a very quiet and very sexual vibe to her, like she was on the prowl. Both of these women were in their 30s too.

And at the end of the day instead of showing interest I just talked to them like friends.

PrettyDecent said:
This is very, very important - you deep dive Jane and started racking more compliance from her. Jane's increasingly relying on you for a good time (she doesn't know anybody else at the party, and My's paired up, so you're her only guide), and you're not giving her good emotions. That's because you're not showing interest and the vibe is too heavy. You need more humour in your interaction. Your friends vibe was perfect - follow exactly as they do.

YUP! This is exactly how it went down - the vibe was too heavy and I didn't show interest, but I was her only source of fun at that point in time.

I wonder if I should have just gone to the beach or something.

PrettyDecent said:
Anyway, Jane feels how everybody else in the party is connecting. Emotionally and sexually.

So now she feels alone and insecure at this party. So she starts lashing out at you (which is what most people do if they're feeling insecure). She also may see you as the cause of this, and so she's particularly disrespectful to you.

Yeah, she definitely was blaming me for what happened. Maybe even My was blaming me for what happened. A core issue here was also letting all of this get to my head, which made the whole situation worse for everyone. My friend on the other hand was very chill and having fun.

PrettyDecent said:
The remedy is this: show more interest, and use more humour. This is particularly important to balance out your new asshole vibe.

Anyway, you're getting these girls attracted to you! Now just show them you're attracted back. This article will show you how to do that - https://www.girlschase.com/content/showi ... keeping-it

This is exactly what I needed to see. Keep things more light, and be more interested in the girl. I must need to really revamp how I show interest - how else would you do that?

Grand Pooba · Aug 22, 2016

FR: Elevator Pull Instant Date

Last week was my first week of work with a new company. I work in a large office building now, and I noticed that the office across from ours always has very attractive girls always going to and from the bathroom, or up and down the elevator. So…this is going to be an opportunity in the coming months to practice meeting these girls and pulling them.

Note: What do you guys think about this? Is it risky to keep approaching girls at a single office that’s not mine but that’s on the same floor? What are the risks of them talking to each other about the guy they met in the elevator?

On Thursday night there was a girl in the elevator on the way out of the office. I left with coworkers but we split up at the lobby level. On the way out of the building I noticed she was walking behind me, so I slowed my pace until she happened to be walking on the street right next to me, as she seemed to be headed the same direction. Cute Chinese girl, dressed very professionally. Her purse had a little minion attached to it - which became significant closer to the pull. I opened direct - complimenting her style and shoes. Asked where she got her shoes from, and somehow that turned into a conversation about where she’s from - been in this city two years and originally from China. We talked about her travels a bit and I learned that she actually lives in the neighborhood right next to mine, but on a different train line. And she just happened to be heading home.

Long story short, I asked her if she’s been around other neighborhoods there - I'll call it Jamestown, and Hawthorne where I live. She told me she had been to Hawthorne once with a friend, and then this conversation continued as we both walked into our subway stop. Her train is a different line from mine. I suggested we go grab coffee in Hawthorne - I didn’t say it was my area but I did say that there are cool coffee shops there and I was headed there anyway - and after a little persistence she complied.

This was excellent seeding, I’ve tried this a couple of times and it seems to work well.

On the train I continued to learn more about what she does - finance and is apparently a huge nerd. I practiced push-pull here a bit - by teasing her that she’s a smart ass, etc, but also complimenting and praising her journey in life so far. The train ride was 20 minutes long and it was full of talking and laughter. I could tell she was pretty relaxed.

On the other end of the train ride, we got to the stop and she followed me up. I then planted a second seed - I asked more about where she went the last time she was here - and apparently she walked the river with her friend. I then started talking about this cool coffee shop I know of in the neighborhood that has more of a latin theme to it and asked her what she thought. She was totally down, and I told her it’s like a five minute walk away.

This coffee shop happens to be right across the street from my apartment.

During the walk I would sometimes gently guide her by the small of her back or interspersing conversation points with light touch and increasing it gradually. We were still having a very vibrant conversation, but soon enough we got to the coffee shop and I suggested that we go sit inside because there’s AC and it’s a little cooler inside. She got a very sweet fruity drink and I ended up getting a sour lemonade. I showed her around the shop a little bit - it’s a cute place - and then we set at 90s on the table closest to the door. The drinks were ready in about five minutes.

Note: A mistake here was actually getting the coffee to stay and not to go. After deconstructing this with another friend, I think this might be the procedural change that I need to make moving forward - keep things moving and different, not staying in one place for too long but always moving towards my place.

During our coffee date I would comment on things she said by sometimes putting her down with light teasing, but then I’d bring it back up by asking about it more and praising her. So, there would be a small moment of silence or nervous laughter, followed by increased deep diving.

The main point of interests during our whole conversation was two fold:

1. She inevitably asked me what I do for work in her building. I joked that I just got a new job, but I wanted her to guess what it is that I do. Note that I was wearing a suit and unbuttoned shirt, very professional looking. When she protested that she had no idea, I gave her three choices: Programmer, janitor, or security guard. She first guessed programmer and I told her no, and second guess was a Janitor and I told her YES! She found all this pretty funny and I built a fake story behind it - how I’m an exclusive high end janitor and that’s why I wear suits.
2. Somehow the conversation turned to people being judgmental in the community she’s from in China, because everyone there knows everyone else even though it’s a big city - people have pretty set communities. So I used this to try to explain how it must be horrible to be witness to that when people don’t understand anything beneath a surface level, but also that where we live is a great place because there are so many kinds of people and everyone is really open minded. She agreed with me.

I was starting to sense after about fifteen minutes that she was getting nervous and a little quieter. This was my escalation window, and we were both about 50% done with our drinks. I knew I had to make some kind of move but I was not 100% confident - could she already be ready?

I chose to go to the bathroom and consult via FB messenger with a friend as to what to do. It felt right to pull her to my apartment and my friend said the same, but I second guessed myself and instead decided that we should walk around the block for ten minutes or so. This gave the girl a chance to text her roommate, which eventually created the fuck up about fifteen minutes later.

We paid separately and got drinks to go, and then I told her that I’d go show her some of the cool architecture around here. She was down and followed me as I created a ten minute or so walk that passed by a church, a library and through a park ending up right by my apartment entry.

On the walk around, the conversation was stalling a little bit, and I could tell that she was very nervous. She was still following my lead but constantly fidgeting with her minion attached to her purse…just tapping it, non stop, the whole walk. I was also nervous myself because I knew what was coming, and this was still a bit experimental. So my anxiety was probably something that she mirrored and felt and could see.

About half a block from my place she starts auto rejecting - she apparently has dinner plans with her roommate and needs to get back that way, and starts asking me about how to get there.

I told her that I’m actually headed that way too, but I want to drop off my stuff really quick and then we’ll go on our way. She complied but the conversation was starting to die at this point and the window was closing quickly.

I came right in front of my apartment and told her I’m going up to drop my stuff. I gave her about ten seconds or so to reply and she said she’d wait down here for me. This was a critical error - I should have continued the conversation heavily and not even given her a split second to think about what was happening, instead just go upstairs and continue talking as if nothing is happening. I then kept the door open and told her it’s hot and there’s AC inside, we’ll go in a minute. Instead, she refused adamantly, saying that she’ll just find her way back on her own. She quickly googled where she was - and it’s only a fifteen minute walk or so to where she lives.

I just smiled and laughed - in the past I would get pissed at myself about failing here - but this time it was different. I was at peace, and I persisted twice (going once….going twice style) but when she was firm in not coming up I just told her it was nice to see her and I enjoyed grabbing coffee with her like this.

We parted ways and she didn’t give me her number, just said that we’ll see each other again sometime…which we will. I went upstairs to my place smiling and laughing….so close!

Things I did well:
- Seed a place to go and then lead her to that place, step by step, multiple times.
- Lead the interaction.
- Created a fun vibe that allowed her to laugh and connect with me without revealing all my cards.
- Used push-pull reasonably.

Things I didn’t do well:
- Wrong procedure in choosing to have coffee inside the shop rather than to go.
- Second guess my instinct to pull her home, and extended her into nervousness and auto rejection.
- Poor communication on that last walk - too many pauses and lulls in conversation.
- I gave her too much time to think about what was happening during the pull and an opportunity for her to reject my offer for her to come upstairs.

I think this is the Proper Procedure:
- Seed the coffee date one step at a time. First seed going to Hawthorne in my area, and then when we actually get there seed the coffee shop across from my place or another equally convenient shop or date plan. CHECK.
- Get coffee TO GO. Imperative that we don’t actually stick around the coffee shop - keep things moving. I am curious how feasible this is in the winter. FAIL.
- Don’t go to the bathroom to give her time to think, follow my instinct and also look more carefully for that lull in the conversation. FAIL.
- Walk around the block with coffee to go for 10-15 minutes, stay in my area and keep the conversation flowing. I can guide her by the small of her back and incorporate some light touch but overall I should stay pretty hands off. CHECK.
- Maybe hint at a bit of a sexual conversation. NEEDS IMPROVEMENT.
- I should hint at my place being nearby by using a landmark so that the girl is at least aware that it is close by. I.e. tell her I live near a hospital, so that she knows it is around the corner somewhere. FAIL.
- Casually pass right by my apartment building and walk in to “drop my bags” because I don’t want to carry them around anymore. CHECK.
- Keep her mind occupied when I am making the pull. Keep talking and don’t stop talking as I head into my apartment building and then into the apartment. Don’t even give her time to think about what’s happening. FAIL.
- Walk inside my apartment, put down my stuff and just sit down on the couch and wait for her to join me, with shoes off. N/A.
- Continue talking and wait for her to get comfortable. Don’t even give her any time to think here, either. Make the conversation stay connection based, interesting, and vibrant. N/A.
- When she actually gets comfortable and settles into being at my place, THEN make the kill. This might not happen right away so I just need to be patient. N/A.

Thoughts on the above?

Conclusion:

I am really happy about how this went down, because this has been happening pretty regularly and I just have to figure out that pull tech, and learn how to set her up so there isn’t any LMR at home. I left that whole interaction smiling and laughing - because I again created an instant date that almost ended up in a girl in my bed on a random Thursday evening. Also, this was my fourth approach last week! And the way this went down also clarified the procedure quite a bit and how to actually do it in the future, I think.

Grand Pooba · Sep 4, 2016

LR: HK 15min Dance Bar Pull, 2016.09.04

I'm in Hong Kong since Friday and until next Sunday the 11th - making a trip to Seoul and Beijing as well later this week.

Intro Thoughts:

This place is insane! So many beautiful girls - ok to be honest - in general I think they are pretty average and some below average, but there are also women from every country on this side of the globe, and quite a few stunners mixed in. HK Chinese, mainland Chinese, Taiwanese, Koreans, Filipinos, and Indonesians mainly. Mixed in with a lot of poorly dressed and behaved male ex pats and some male and female European/Australians, residents or tourists.

Really reminds me of New York City - on crack. What's very different though is it's far more crowded and congested, but the pace of the city feels much slower and relaxed than NYC. People walk slow, and they make time to talk to you.

I have also noticed quite a few women and men checking me out as an oddity - especially when I was walking around with a girl in hand.

I've been here three nights, and I have had four girls in my bed so far and have fucked three of them. There's one in my room right now, in fact, but she's quite drunk and didn't want to kiss me at home. We cuddled, and I put her in bed to sleep.

Side note: I'll be honest - I did pay for one girl for $145 US. It was at like 4:00am the same night I landed - I was already drunk after meeting a drunk expat who then kept buying me drinks while showing me the bars around my areas - and I just wanted to get laid. I have never done this before. She was a cute Filipina whom I met in a bar, but waking up next to her I felt so hollow and empty...I paid for sex. I felt like I quit the game and settled for something cheap and easy, and it didn't feel good because I didn't feel there was a connection. I woke up in the morning just staring at the ceiling...before fucking the girl in my bed a couple more times. I think we connected a lot more in the morning and she was genuinely passionate with me.

Report:

I heard long ago that on Sundays all the foreign domestic workers (nanny's etc) have their day off and spend the whole day drinking, dancing, and hanging out in some bars about ten minutes from where I am staying. There are a couple of articles on the internet about this.

I woke up pretty late Sunday - had yet a different girl the previous night - and wandered around the city doing approaches and wandering around the city for about two hours, from 3-5pm.

Then feeling this was unsuccessful I wandered over to the area with these bars. Walked upstairs to one of them that had pounding music - literally it was packed full of 100 Filipina women and like ten or fifteen guys, of which maybe five were attractive. Never seen such a thing in my life!

Warming up was a bit tough - wasn't sure what approach to take. By the end of my 45 minutes in that dance bar it was so easy in hindsight. I decided that I would just go in with the attitude to have fun. This bar was full of women tipsy, dancing and partying. My first six or so approaches were weak. First I was trying to talk to the girls over the loud music - a live band - and while they were all dancing to the band. Didn't really go anywhere. By the third or fourth girl I started to use more touch and body language, and also by moving girls around a bit more (i.e. from dance floor to bar or vice versa). But still, I noticed after about five minutes of conversation, even though they were touching me and being physical, they'd autoreject in about five minutes after the conversation was waning,

I was sitting on the bar stools just looking at the crowd, smiling. Then I looked to my right and noticed that a barstool that was empty a minute ago was now filled with a tall and sexy Filipina in heels - in my opinion one of the best girls in that place. I opened her and started talking to her while seated.

While this was happening I thought back to my June SF report, as well as a book I read called "Dance Floor Seduction: The Skills Method." In the former, I moved the girl around so much to create compliance and she just followed my lead. In the latter, Skills recommends seducing a girl in a club through dance and body language alone. So, I completely changed my method by combining these two.

First I moved her to the dance floor. I took her hand and said "let's dance," then pulled her slowly and dominantly through the crowd of women. I found and empty spot and danced literally as erotic as I could (this is from Skill's book). I would twirl her once in a while, but then I'd take her by the lower waist and ass and just pushed her into me. I stuck my leg between hers and danced and gyrated like we were fucking. I'd grab her ass and squeeze it while dancing, I'd drop low in front of her and gyrate my hips, and then I'd disconnect a bit and twirl her. Then I'd go back to erotic dancing and push her into me and grab her ass.

Five minutes of this and I moved her to the bar. I led her by holding her hand and pulling her through the crowd. Got a water for myself and some drink for her, I think it was like $20 US total.

Made some more light conversation, I asked her if she knows people here. She said she's all by herself, her friend she came with already left.

Green light!

The conversation was waning, so I just said "let's get out of here." She looked at me slightly quizzical, so I moved my face really close to hers and kissed her lightly. Just one gentle kiss, and then I backed off. She complied. I was holding her by the waist.

Saw that she had only finished half her drink. At first I said "we'll go when you finish your drink." Then thirty seconds later I changed my mind - fuck it. I grabbed her hand and led her out of there without a word, onto the street. 5:45pm.

Is it really this easy? 15 minutes?

We walked hand in hand for ten minutes meandering through the streets towards my apartment. I'd say we were only talking for about 25% of the time - she was sharing stories from when she lived in Saudi Arabia, and talking to me in Arabic, I shared some of my travel stories. But it was mostly just quiet.

Came home, walked up quietly to the fifth floor, slammed her against the wall when I got in and started making out passionately. Told her to go to the bathroom, when she came out I picked her up and took her to the bedroom. I couldn't get hard at first, but then I carried her to the living room and we ended up fucking a bit later on the living room floor.

She left immediately afterwards, it was about 7, 7:15pm and she had some kind of curfew, plus work early in the morning. I walked hand in hand with her back to the bar - apparently she forgot her purse that she checked in there, and then I walked to the subway station where I dropped her off. I swear, almost every single person that passed us on the street looked at us while we were walking hand in hand.

Since she works all week we proposed meeting up again on Sunday morning - a week from today - right before I leave.

Grand Pooba · Sep 5, 2016

LR-: HK Korean Traveler at Hookah Lounge, 2016.09.04

Summary:

This should have been a full out LR. The only reason it wasn’t is because I literally couldn’t get hard all night long. Not sure why, if it’s a health issue or just me being in my head. Fucking terrible and has a lot of bigger implications - it happens enough to me that I feel like I should get checked out or work on my inner psychology.

 This is a longer report because it is a very different process from the last one I posted from earlier in the day.

Introduction:

Wandering around Hong Kong at night, looking for cool places to see. It was Sunday night, the city was pretty quiet.

I went to a Tiki Lounge I had been at on Saturday night - it was packed that night, but tonight there were only seven or so people there - mostly couples and a guy working. I asked the server where is cool to go around here, and he recommended I check out a street nearby around the corner. He noted that everything is probably going to be quiet as people have work tomorrow, but there is one spot I might like with nice cocktails.

I finished my drink and wandered that way, all the spots on this street were pretty empty, but I could hear crowds and a lot of music coming from somewhere closeby. I tried to trace it, and ended up waking down some stairs and following into another narrow street that led to a street with bars absolutely packed full of people. It was wonderful - the city was alive and happening.

Then walking down this I saw down another street people smoking hookah. I love hookah, turned into here to find a dead end alley with only hookah lounges. Sweet! But I’m by myself, and I don’t want to be by myself.

So I scoped out all the hookah lounges and picked the one that had two vibrant girls sitting and talking to each other. I ordered and sat in a place where one might notice me - she did soon enough and looked at me, we made eye contact for a few minutes. Then about five seconds later I walked up to her and told her that she had absolutely gorgeous eyes. I made a bit of small talk with them, told them I’m visiting from out of town and then I asked if I can sit with them. They were down.

I moved all my shit over to the empty chair and sat with these two pretty girls. Turns out one is from Canada and studies there, and the other studies here but is well traveled. I spent the next hour or chatting with these girls and having a great time. They had to head out to meet some curfew with families and catch the last subway train. I grabbed one of the girls numbers planning to meet up later (hopefully) and then chatted a bunch of Canadian guys on vacation sitting right behind me.

Somewhere in this trade I met the owner of the hookah lounge. And then when the Canadians left, I asked if I could sit with him and his companion - a cute Korean girl with dyed blond hair who was chatting and also smoking hookah.

The Korean Girl:

Now the three of us were sitting together and I was having fun chatting with the two of them. I learned that the girl is leaving tomorrow at 1pm, but is traveling by herself from some city in Korea.

Somehow in this whole exchange there was a vibe building up between the Korean girl and I. One thing that made this really interesting is that she started talking to the hookah lounge owner - an Indian guy - in Hindi. Now, I’m Pakistani and I also know some hindi. So all of a sudden all three of us started talking to each other in Hindi - and we were also walking the Korean girl through this when she was making mistakes.

 Turns out she’s been to India traveling by herself and really likes the country for the most part. And presumably, I think she likes Indian guys.

We’re smoking hookah and chatting, and I catch her looking at me sometimes. We were definitely vibing and making similar facial expressions with each other.

 At some point she left to go to the bathroom and I asked the owner if he’s friends with her or something more. He asked me why - I simply said “because I think she’s cute.” He then told me that she was here yesterday, and she’s here with him today.

 Couldn’t tell if he was with her or not so I stayed cool and stuck around to see what would happen. Somewhere in this the girl started to feel really sick - she had smoked hookah for the first time ever this weekend, and was also a bit drunk. She went to the bathroom to puke, and then came back feeling a lot better.

About twenty minutes later the hookah lounge owner left, leaving just the two of us alone. I moved to the seat across from her and started finding out logistics - where she lives is far from where I’m staying, but I also told her about where I’m staying and showed her on a map. I also revealed I’m visiting Korea later this week. She suggested we get together in her town, I said “maybe.”

She also asked me what happened to my friends, the two girls I was sitting with. I told her I had met them earlier and made friends with them - I’m traveling alone, after all. She was a little taken aback by this but in a good way.

Near Derail:

One of the servers I made friends with noticed the two of us chatting and then went up to her and basically started saying to her “he’s cool, you should go home with him.” And she looked at him quizzically and very perplexed, but he kept saying this and kept pointing to me, trying to make this point. I then stepped in and told him and her “oh no no it’s not like that - we’re just friends. It’s okay man.” She looked at me and nodded, touched me on my arm on the table and told him the same thing. And then he walked off soon after.

Phew! But this would have some implications later.

One - I set us up as a friends frame.

Two - after this point, she was touching me pretty readily, and I was touching her at times too. I gradually built up touch after this point over the course of the night.

Pull:

We were both tired, it was around 1am. I told her “let’s go,” and she got up and followed me. I had already paid long ago. Said bye to the staff I knew and walked off with her.

I immediately started touching her along the waist, very quickly, as soon as we were out of sight of the hookah lounge.

 Finding a cab was tough - three passed before one would take us. In the cab I sat in the middle and her to my left, and put my hand on her leg for about five seconds. She was a bit shocked by this, but I released it and just started talking to her. I told the cab driver to go to an intersection near my house. He was pissed off at us for whatever reason and drove insanely fast to this area, freaking the girl out a little bit.

In the cab she told me that both in India and in Korea, men judge women harshly for their choices - including smoking. I told her that it sucks, but a lot of men do that and it’s quite sad. I framed it as people should be allowed to do what they feel like and everyone would be a lot better off accepting people for their choices.

When we got there, I offered to pay instead but then she offered to and paid instead for a slightly higher cab fare. He was a bit nicer to her.

 When she got out she realized we weren’t in her area and mine instead - LOL. I didn’t say anything. Then I just walked with her a block away to my apartment and then up five floors. I didn’t touch her too much in this process, she just followed me and I told her we’d chill and hang out for a bit.

At Home:

She came up, I had her take off her shoes, then i got some water and we sat on the couch together. We ere just chilling on the couch now. I hung back, she would talk to me and at times touch me and start putting her arms on my legs while leaning into me. We were talking about guys and sexuality - a topic that she actually brought up - and also revealed that she hasn’t had a boyfriend in years. The last one was Korean, and she doesn’t like Korean guys. She likes Indian guys, but in India she felt like all the guys there didn’t respect her. I was in agreement and told her that a lot of guys have no idea how to be in relationship with women and understand what they really want.

I didn’t feel like she was ready, so I proposed we watch a tv show for a while. However, on Amazon I guess they don’t have rights to show things in the US, so I couldn’t do this and gave up.

Right after this, because she was cuddling up towards me and leaning on me and touching me periodically, and myself touching her, I tried going for the kill. I manhandled her a little bit and pushed her lips towards me and went for it - but she went into “flight” mode. She deflected. I then basically got on top of her and pinned her down on the couch and tried again.

HER: No no no….we’re friends remember? We’re friends! No no no!
ME: Haha yeah, we’re really good friends.
HER: No no, I don’t want to, OK? I don’t want to.
ME: Babe! Why not??  
HER: I don’t want to have sex. I just want to hang out and be friends.
.
HER: I just like when a man respects women, and you seem like a man who respects women.
ME: Eh, it’s cool and you’re cool. I like hanging out with you too, but I’m a man babe.
HER: I know, I just don’t want to tonight.
ME: That sucks, sounds like you don’t enjoy sex.
HER: Well I do enjoy sex, but only when I want it.

Eh, whatever…NBD.

Facing this, I decided we should go upstairs to the private rooftop balcony that came with this apartment. She followed me up to this apartment’s rooftop on the 6th floor looking out over the city. We sat on a bench and talked a bit, but a little more quietly.

I put my arm around her and rested my hand on her ass, but after about 30 seconds she got a bit freaked out and kept trying to pull it away. I kept my arm there but moved my hand down to the bench, where she held it down. We sat there quietly hanging out and leaning on each other for about 5 minutes, making small conversation.

It was pretty clear that she was tired, and it was already like after 2:00am. So I made her get up and pushed a table into the bench, creating a large even platform. We both then lay down on the bench and cuddled together - her the little spoon and me the big spoon. I put my arms over and under her, and she put her head on one and held my other hand.

We both passed out for twenty minutes, then I woke her up forcefully. She was quite drunk and feeling shitty, so I took her downstairs and just led her to my bed where she crashed.

I then finished writing my last report.

At Night:

I got into bed around 4:30am and cuddled with her with my clothes on. She cuddled back with me and started to escalate on ME. She was just rubbing her legs into me, and then I pulled her on top of me and simulated sex with both our clothes on. She was super into it, very horny, moaning and groaning and getting pretty wild. Quickly stripped off both our clothes, she got off me and started to pounce on me passionately. I flipped her over on her back. Started kissing.

HER: Do you have protection?

I looked for my condoms. Fuck! They’re in the other room. I got up quick and grabbed them from the other bedroom and got it out, but in that rush I lost the hard on I had. It never came back.

I tried fingering her to pause, and going down on her, and she rejected both.

She just wanted my cock in her, and didn’t really want to look at me or know she was sleeping with a total stranger. But no matter what I did I couldn’t focus and get hard again. This lasted for twenty minutes or so while she was being super horny with me, and then I wound down and just relaxed on top of her.

HER: That’s it?? Hahaha.

Fuck, now she’s going into autorejection. After this point she was a little bit bitchier with me - sometimes she’d cuddle up with me, and other times she’d try to push me away and sleep alone. It was a total push pull and I was trying to find a way to turn this around.

After one I just straight up told her, “babe, listen, I don’t mean this in any bad way but it’s a real turn off for me when I get pushed away like you’re doing right now. I can’t focus on you when that happens.” Then I turned over and tried to go to sleep.

I tried escalating a few times during the night, to no avail. No matter what I did I was fucking too in my head and couldn’t get hard at all. I got to about 50% at times, but each time I tried to enter her I couldn’t get it in at half mast - she was fucking horny and would get into it very passionately, but I couldn’t seal the deal.

After each failed entry she would go into a bit of an auto rejection and either laugh a lot, or push me away, or both.

I figured out after the third or fourth time that when this happens if I either laugh myself and continue to bite her and be passionate, or just snarl at her and hiss at her like a cat would, she’d back down and submit to me. I tried this the last two or so times - it worked. Much better frame, she backed off.

Didn’t sleep at all. Made one last move in the daylight, same thing - she was super passionate, I couldn’t close.

Next Day:

Woke up and she was a bit embarrassed to have been sexual with me. Kept trying to put on her clothes without me looking. This was hysterical, because I’d already seen her naked and all that. I guess maybe she hasn’t done this much.

She put on her clothes and we hung out for another hour drinking tea and chatting about Korea and talking in Hindi. There was still something there - we were cuddling and hanging out with each other, she was still holding me and touching me constantly. More comfortable. Around 830 she had to go to go home pack and catch her flight. I kissed her passionately one last time at home, I then walked her to the subway station while holding hands and wished her well.

I told her we should get together in Korea a couple of times before leaving - twice at home and once at the subway station. To each of these she laughed and always said “maybe” with a bit of a sly smile and wink. Presumably that’s a no, and up to now she hasn’t responded to me on Facebook messenger although did accept my friend request.

Closing Thoughts:

The difference between me seeing her again in Korea and probably never seeing her again was the sex - I wasn’t able to deliver when she wanted it and on some level this pushed her a bit into auto rejection later at night and into the morning. It’s not really something I could manage - I just didn’t deliver the goods.

Everything else was mostly a clean process. I think it would have been better if I didn’t push for the kiss kill, and instead just cuddled and then said “I’m tired, let’s go to bed.” Then we could sleep together.

Seamy · Aug 24, 2020

you have I fucking big persistent man , I do not even have quarter of your

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