Passion Lab

fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
FU: SOLO HB8.5 ON THE BOARDWALK

This major fuckup was a devil and an angel. It exposed many flaws in my current game (see the annotations at the bottom)..but skyrocketed my confidence levels and motivation.

It comes wrapped up in a bundle of awkward in-betweenness: I’ve got enough reference points from the last few weeks that I’m in the middle of levelling up every aspect of my early game - really digging down on perfecting techniques and strategies of approach-to-hook in daygame (at the beach and bus terminal) and at the bar. I know the old way of doing things is not quite perfect, but haven’t quite developed fully and executed the new way of doing things yet. So, last couple of sessions I find myself falling back into the old style in uncertain situations, or using a mix of the old and new.

WHAT HAPPENED?

I went out both nights this weekend and am dead tired. Despite going out for 1 daygame session earlier today, I’m desperate to go for another - even though I’m not in the best state.

Normally I review my material before each session….but today I choose to NOT to review it due to my low energy. I manage to get out of the house and push myself to the beach, but as I head there, I choose NOT to practice my material on the way.

And as I approach the beach, I notice I am bothered by approach anxiety. What’s going on, I think, normally I’m confident in this environment? Not good. I quickly turn these thoughts off, and continue to pump my state while maintaining my posture and facial expression.

I walk down the boardwalk, approach a couple of group sets. Notice my verbal fluency is not on par with where I’d like it to be. Having a hard time connecting ideas.

After I reach the end of the boardwalk, I go the opposite way back. Close to the boardwalk entrance, I spot a solo girl walking towards me - taking pictures of the sunset. Don’t get a good look at her as I’m not planning to approach a walking set. If I end up near her again and she’s stationary, I’ll talk to her then.

The entrance of the boardwalk leads onto a parking lot, and I go stand on the edge of the parking lot and boardwalk, and pretend to be busy looking at the sunset as I plan my next move. I take a peak down the boardwalk. I see this solo girl has momentarily stopped on the boardwalk 50 feet away, to take pictures.

Then I notice she’s coming back my way. I focus back in on the sun. I listen to the sound of her footsteps and keys rattling as she approaches behind me. Suddenly, the sounds stop. I sneak a quick peak through my periphs. She’s 15 feet behind me and snapping more pics of the sunset.

TIME TO MOVE

I turn around. Excuse me! I say, while walking towards her. [1] Do you know exactly who you look like? [2] [3]

As our eyes meet, I am astonished by her level of beauty. She is one of the most gorgeous girls I’ve seen in my life. Even hotter than the hottest girls in Colombia. Like, supermodel type looks. I rarely see girls of this quality, much less in my small hometown.

She’s receptive and we're holding strong eye contact. I pretend to have forgotten the full name of who she looks like, but I give her some hints. The name is Audrey, and she's from the olden times. Last name starts with an H. We figure out together that its Audrey Hepburn, and i clarify its the vibe - not the way she looks.

Then I break eye contact. [4] I look back and she's using the moment to snap a couple pics of the sunset.

“btw, im quite jealous of your choice for a picture spot.” I say. She says, “oh, you’re not from around here?” Im caught off guard. This is a rare answer to that line. I tell her straight up where I’m from, explaining how I’ve lived here most of my life but came from a smaller city. [5] Chat back and forth shortly about this and where she's from, but once again, the fluency is not there.

Another silence with extended broken eye contact. I’m about to run the herd gambit on her but I’m frozen in my head on how to start it. [6]

FOG…THE DETAILS MATTER HERE. HOW ARE YOU GONNA START IT? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA SAY? WAIT A SEC, YOU’RE HESITATING. THE SILENCE IS GETTING TOO LONG! NO THE VIBE IS CRASHING, FUCKING LOOK AT HER, DO SOMETHING!

“Have a nice night! Nice chatting with you.” She says as she walks off.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

I walk off to another area of the beach to debrief. I'm heartwrenched, but notice my confidence levels surging. If I can approach girls like that, and not get rejected, I can do anything! Still, I cannot let these mistakes happen again - even on bad days. While I'm writing down my notes, many girls pass by me. They are all intimidated by my presence, which has become considerably amped up in the short time since my departure with this beautiful woman. I smile devilishly to myself because it almost feels...easy with them.

MISTAKES

[1]
Should have delivered the excuse me over my shoulder. I walked towards her too soon and I could see her eyes widen - a sign she was a little bit startled.
[2] Totally forgot to include "I've got something important to tell you" in between "excuse me" and "do you know exactly who you look like?"
[3] Lack of pauses caused a lack of impact.
[4] Breaking eye contact at the wrong times is a major sticking point for me right now, and instantly killing off the intensity in hotter sets. Troubleshooting it aggressively this week.
[5] Fell into her social frame grab. Ideally, I would have answered vaguely, then DHV'ed by discussing the best spots to take sunset pictures in town, then describing what makes this particular location so good for sunsets.
[6] I’ve been starting the herd gambit with “is it cool if I grab your opinion on something, its for a friend of mine who’s struggling right now” without giving them a chance to butt in. But, this weekend I was starting it with “is it cool if I grab your opinion on something” and noticed girls saying “maybe, depends on what it is.” The new way i want to go is "im gonna run something by you real quick, its about a friend of mine whos struggling right now" to manage value attainability and compliance effectively. I wanted to use the new way on her, but the old way was stuck in my head cuz of pressure, so I hesitated.
 
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fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
KATE…DON’T FOLLOW THE HERD!

This dramatic gambit has become a staple of my early game. It's highly effective at building social frame, stimulation and compliance with women. Day or night. I like to throw it in after the first couple of conversation topics.

oh that reminds me, I'm going to run something by you real quick. its about a friend of mine who’s struggling right now....she really wants to break up with her boyfriend for her new boytoy. except... shes worried. Shes worried about what society will think. and im telling her, look, listen….FUCK what society thinks. You DO want to be an independent woman because thats what you are...simply due to the fact that youre human, and humans are free...

And at the end of the day, you can choose to live your life in one of two ways...You can follow the herd everywhere and regret life on your deathbed...Or you can break free from the chains as you march to the beat of your own drum.

NOTES

The girl(s) will giggle over the, "she wants to break up her boyfriend" bit, be astonished by the independent woman line, and then by the time the contrast frame with idioms ends, eye sparkles have appeared.

Often they'll be voicing their opinions on the story by the time i finish, especially if i use pauses. I engage them on it: for example, using elicitation to draw out their opinions further... explaining more, like how she checked out a while back because there was no emotional connection....or adding a time element like how X years from now, she'll look back on this and it won't even matter.

If they heard me out on the gambit all the way through without saying anything, I experimented with using the below question at the end as a way to force an answer:
She was about to call her boyfriend over right then and break up with him but now she's hesitant again. So let me ask you this....if she was here with us right now, and you could look her in the eye and talk to her....what would you say to tip her over the edge?

^Common answers were incredibly short and boring like, "do what makes you happy" and "just do it." Wasn't really a fan. In the future, if I choose to ask a question, i will experiment with different ones like, "hows this make you feel?"

The next gambit I like to get into after the herd gambit is the tourist frame. I use the following line to transition and normally get giggles here as well:
[big sigh] all this drama has me wanting to go on a trip somewhere nice and warm...if i were to ask you where you would go, what would you say?

Special thanks to Bacchus, Teevs and Lofty for the inspiration.
 
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fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
SOCIAL BUTTERFLY DROPPING BY TO SAY HI

This opening routine makes me a social god at my small town bar. It gets me in with any group really quickly, and generates massive social proof + momentum when I run it on multiple groups in short succession.

It involves using a time constraint and a social meta pace with a contrast frame. A good energy is also a requirement for this one.

FOG: hey yaaa'll, dropping by to say helloo.
GROUP: hey!
FOG: how's everyones night going?
GROUP: good!
FOG: amazing :) by the way, how do ya’ll know each other? Im so curious
GROUP: we're all roommates! we just moved in together
FOG: ahh.. i see....roommates. so when ya’ll met, was it instant friendship?
GROUP: yes. We were instant besties.
FOG: thats awesome, isn’t it interesting how... shortly after meeting someone, you can feel like you're on the same wavelength as them?
GROUP: Yes!
FOG: And as you talk, you can sense this person understands you on a deeper level.
GROUP: Right!?
FOG: On the other hand, sometimes these genuine friendships happen gradually. Where it’s like the more you find out about them, and the more time you spend talking… the more this feeling of friendship grows.

THE BENEFITS

1. Run the group and/or the room
2. Generate good emotions in everyone
3. Buy time to discern who's interested and who’s not

NOTES

- After this, if I chose to continue hanging with the group, I found myself entering a period of vibing with them, using the herd gambit, getting their IGs etc
- Going forward, i plan to hone in on combining groups and isolating girls from groups
- The social meta pace + contrast frame also works well with daygame groups
 

fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU LOOK LIKE? FOG’S FLIP

I started using the “do you know who you look like” opener a while ago as a fall back for stationary sets in which I couldn’t use something situational like a reality pace.

At first I ran into the common struggles associated with this opener:
  1. NOT being able to think of a person the girl looks like, and/or
  2. Having her disagree with who she looks like [bad for the social frame!]
After making some tweaks, I solved these issues and found this version to be highly effective on stationary sets in capturing attention, creating tension, and generating curiosity, especially when delivered with contained awe.

FOG: Excuse me. [delivered from 4.5 metres away as I'm walking towards her]
FOG: I've got something important to tell you. [as i make first eye contact, hold it, and stop in her social/personal space]
HB: ...
FOG: Has anybody ever told you...exactly who you look like?
HB: No!?!
FOG: This is blowing my mind right now...
HB: *Giggles*
FOG: She's a famous person from the 90s and you....are just like her.
HB: Tell me!
FOG: Her name is... one i forget, but it's not the way you look. its more your vibe, you know? Your energy.
HB: Yeah!

NOTES

When I first experimented with this opener, I was telling every girl they looked like the actress Audrey Hepburn. They would sometimes disagree. When the disagreement happened I would reframe it and tell her it was her VIBE, not the way she looked. This always trumped them and they would agree with my reframe. But, I wanted to avoid the hiccup of the disagreement from the very start. So I started not being able to remember the name.

I also stopped telling girls the name and that it was an actress because it was too validating and more likely to be received as a compliment.

A blackhole of tension is created with this opener. To manage it properly and carry it further into the conversation, I transition out of the opener using the "its not your looks, its your vibe" reframe and into a social frame builder [the vibe of today]

I always bring up the lookalike again later directly after another stimulating topic, saying something like, “you know what...I wish I knew who that person was we were talking about.” This amplifies and cements their curiosity. For example check out this text I got from my dream girl after grabbing her number at the beach.

FOG: Super nice to meet you HB :) - fog
HB: Likewise. :) you’ll have to let me know if you think of the person with the vibe, im curious now.

In daygame groups, do you know who you look like followed by social butterfly dropping by to say hi [starting from "how do y'all know each other, I'm curious"] is a powerful combo. I often find girls flipping in interest, frame grabbing or asking me questions about myself when using it.
 
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mist

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 2, 2021
Messages
377
DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU LOOK LIKE? FOG’S FLIP

I started using the “do you know who you look like” opener a while ago as a fall back for stationary sets in which I couldn’t use something situational like a reality pace.

At first I ran into the common struggles associated with this opener:
  1. NOT being able to think of a person the girl looks like, and/or
  2. Having her disagree with who she looks like [bad for the social frame!]
After making some tweaks, I solved these issues and found this version to be highly effective on stationary sets in capturing attention, creating tension, and generating curiosity, especially when delivered with contained awe.

FOG: Excuse me. [delivered from 4.5 metres away as I'm walking towards her]
FOG: I've got something important to tell you. [as i make first eye contact, hold it, and stop in her social/personal space]
HB: ...
FOG: Has anybody ever told you...exactly who you look like?
HB: No!?!
FOG: This is blowing my mind right now...
HB: *Giggles*
FOG: She's a famous person from the 90s and you....are just like her.
HB: Tell me!
FOG: Her name is... one i forget, but it's not the way you look. its more your vibe, you know? Your energy.
HB: Yeah!

NOTES

When I first experimented with this opener, I was telling every girl they looked like the actress Audrey Hepburn. They would sometimes disagree. When the disagreement happened I would reframe it and tell her it was her VIBE, not the way she looked. This always trumped them and they would agree with my reframe. But, I wanted to avoid the hiccup of the disagreement from the very start. So I started not being able to remember the name.

I also stopped telling girls the name and that it was an actress because it was too validating and more likely to be received as a compliment.

A blackhole of tension is created with this opener. To manage it properly and carry it further into the conversation, I transition out of the opener using the "its not your looks, its your vibe" reframe and into a social frame builder [the vibe of today]

I always bring up the lookalike again later directly after another stimulating topic, saying something like, “you know what...I wish I knew who that person was we were talking about.” This amplifies and cements their curiosity. For example check out this text I got from my dream girl after grabbing her number at the beach.



In daygame groups, do you know who you look like followed by social butterfly dropping by to say hi [starting from "how do y'all know each other, I'm curious"] is a powerful combo. I often find girls flipping in interest, frame grabbing or asking me questions about myself when using it.
Quality stack.

I'm stealing this awesome stack.
 

fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
FR: HORNY IN MINUTES

It's around 5:30PM and the sun has gone down. I'm walking down a busy street in darkness of my old college town. The sounds of rush hour traffic fill my ears, while my mind transports me back to an earlier event that day...

...Standing in front of me is a beautiful dark-haired vixen. As I speak the song of self-transformation, her eyes widen. It was interest at first glance for her, and now I've struck a deep cord. Moments later, she writes down her number in my phone as we prepare to part ways. She has some birthday shopping to do for her boyfriend, and I have more women to approach. I turn to leave and lock eyes with an awkward shrimp. He's been right next to us the whole time, listening in on our conversation. And his jaw is hanging open...

I soak in amusement over mental pictures of shocked shrimps as I continue walking. My plan is to head home for the night. But moments later, I spot a bus stop up ahead. And illuminated under the glow of the street lights... is a girl. A perfect opportunity to seize.

I reach the bus stop, and position myself a couple meters in front of her. A few seconds pass. I turn my head to towards her, and open.

FOG: excuse me. I've got something important to tell you.
HB: what is it?
FOG: has anybody ever told you...exactly who you look like?
HB: no!?
FOG: this is blowing my mind right now. She's a famous person from the 90s and you are just like her.
HB: who is it?
FOG: i can’t quite remember, but it's not the way you look. its more your vibe, you know?
HB: yes.
FOG: actually, speaking of vibe…do you like the vibe of today?
HB: it's alright.
FOG: have you ever had a day go from alright to amazing in the blink of an eye?
HB: yeah!
FOG: me too. you know, while we’re here, im gonna run something by you real quick. you’re not a judgemental person right?
HB: im definitely not
FOG: okay good. so this is about a friend of mine who’s struggling right now. she really wants to break up with her boyfriend for her new boytoy. except she’s worried about what people will think. and its holding her back.
HB: *staring intently*
FOG: when she told me this, i was like…look, listen. FUCK what people think. you DO want to be an independent woman because thats what you are...simply due to the fact that youre human, and humans are free. and the thing is, she has the choice to live her life in one of two ways...she can follow the herd everywhere, doing what everyone else wants her to do, and she'll regret life on her deathbed...or she can break free from the chains as she marches to the beat of her own drum, doing what makes her happy...

Although she seemed a bit skeptical of me at first, she's completely sucked in now. We're holding strong eye contact and shimmers of what she's feeling within are starting to bubble to the surface. As I’m running through these last little bits, a particularly loud car drives by and she breaks eye contact. I watch as her eyes follow the movement of the car. But the distraction fades into the distance and she locks eyes with me again, still in the same state.

FOG: and then she was like, i wish i could just win the lottery and go on a trip somewhere nice and warm to get away from all this. it sorta got me thinking. what would i do if i won the lottery? So if i were to ask you...what you would do if you won the lottery...what would you say?
HB: I would go to australia.
FOG: australia, nice. lets say you leave the bus stop, get on a plane, and arrive in australia. you go to the hotel, unpack your bags and walk out onto the street. what’s the very first thing you do?
HB: id visit my friend!
FOG: i see. and when you first met your friend, was it instant friendship?
HB: it was.
FOG: thats awesome, it’s interesting how... shortly after meeting someone, you can feel like you're on the same wavelength as them. and as you talk, you can sense this person understands you on a deeper level.
HB: o_O

As this moment unfolds, her stimulation continues to build slowly. Then my last comment fast forwards her to a peak where a wildly intense look spreads across her face.

FOG: you know, speaking of travel, i would probably go to brazil. It seems like one of those places with a fun environment to explore. You can immerse yourself in the culture, and meet some very exciting people…before returning home like nothing happened.
HB: *staring at me, consumed by lust*

That wildly intense look disappears. It's replaced with an oh-so-lovely expression of complete and utter lust. But the spell is about to be broken. Out of the corner of my eye I spot a bus arriving. As it pulls up, she starts to move towards it. I propose chatting again sometime... but she says something unintelligible and disappears up the stairs and into the bus, never to be seen again.

The bus drives away and I'm left feeling elated, knowing I'm closer than ever before to where I need to be with indirect daygame.
 
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fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
LIFE UPDATE

An update from me…

Late last year, I accepted an offer for a new job in performance marketing with an agency…it pays shockingly well and has lots of opportunity for growth. I’m very happy with this :)

There are other positive changes that have happened too: I quit porn and weed, and am 5 months clean from both.

As for girls….daygame is temporarily on the backburner while I focus on my job (and for a couple of other reasons). In the meantime I'm running a rigorous testing program on facebook where I constantly develop and perfect new material on 100s of girls.

My return to the field will be soon. I’m starting a new adventure in a couple of weeks, and plan to travel most of this year. First stop is Montreal, and after that I’ll be heading back down to South America. Europe is also in the cards….

Here’s a few of the high-powered concepts, strategies and techniques I’ve been honing for use in my game:
  • Manipulating counterfactual and episodic future thinking patterns
  • Imaginative reframing
  • Reaching golden hooks
  • Accessing/creating her ideal self
  • Early-game sexual framing
  • SOT development: connection and chemistry
 
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fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
LR: DAYGAME - BRAVING SHAME

In the Peruvian mountains lies Cusco, the city of celebration.

At Cusco’s centre is the main public square. This open space features a central fountain, gardens and benches. It’s a picturesque resting spot for locals and tourists alike…and a place I hang out often.

Today, I spy a cute lone wolf sitting on a bench at the square’s edge. This particular girl has dirty blonde hair and a roundish face. A baggy long sleeve denim shirt hangs off her frame. Underneath, a white tank top. She seems warm and cheery, like she has no cares in the world!

So I walk over to her and grab her attention with intrigue bait and a cold read. She laughs, smiles and invites me to sit down. Through some basic get-to-know-you talk, I discover she’s brazilian and travelling alone. Her name is Aunza.

Shortly after we end up moving to a different bench because the sun is blinding our eyes. I use this transition to nudge the conversation in a sexual direction. When we sit down, I get her opinion. “Who has it harder in Brazil when it comes to dating… men or women?” I ask. Aunza responds by asking me what my intentions are. I play a wide frame and toss the question back to let her fill in the blank. We decide that we want to have fun with each other later.

Fast forward to that evening. We’re sitting on the couch in the dim light of my apartment, talking about fantasy vs. desire.

Wading deeper into her mind, Aunza makes a remark about some sexual shame she carries, and adds that she wants to mute this corrosive emotion with alcohol tonight. I suggest we could go get some, but she declines. And then sends the conversation in a direction that suggests she needs to feel some connection…even before she considers drinking.

So I ask into her shame. And she tells me everything. About her awful childhood. How she faced rejection from her parents. What it means to her. Then I explore with her how it feels to let go. As I describe this feeling with a splash of colour, she gets more sparky and loose.

Next I share some relevant stories. First I tell the struggles of my sexually repressed friend, which ends with part of the purity gambit. Then, a deeply personal experience from my own childhood:

FOG: When I was younger, my dad tried to prevent me from expressing myself. Every time I showed emotion, he looked at me with a nasty look on his face, like I was some dirty, disgusting creature. It felt awful, so I stopped expressing myself completely around him. But as I got older I was like, FUCK YOU DAD! I’ll do what I want! And I broke free from the chains he had me in and started to march to the beat of my own drum. And the feeling I got as I liberated myself more and more from his judgement, was amazing…

When this bit rolls off my tongue, Aunza leans in and kisses me with alot of enthusiasm. :)

It’s intense, but the moments start to cool down as we shift to some lighter, unrelated connection-building topics. It’s not long before she lets me know we can go to get some booze. When we return from the store she sips on wine while we melt into a couch cuddle. We chat and laugh, discussing whatever comes to mind. The vibe, once serious, is now wholey playful.

Then she stands up in front of me and starts to strip off all her clothing. I gaze at her and smile. There’s nothing holding her back now!

Now nearly naked, she joins me again… and I make her my lover.
 

fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
LIMA RECAP

I spent a month in Peru’s capital, Lima, and had some amazing times with women.

I fucked 3 girls:

Tamba
- Colombian from extended social circle
- Short and cute with an amazing body
- Turning point: showed a non-judgemental attitude towards her spirituality
- Handled her period objection

Kalize
- Peruvian from online
- A dream girl in all aspects
- Turning point: talked about sexual respect
- Built a strong princess narrative with her

Fiorella
- Peruvian from online
- Cute, fat ass, very loud snorer
- Turning point: made her feel liberated around me
 
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fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
FR+: A Lonely Reflection

This report starts shortly before I brought this girl home. It’s a great example of the common patterns I'm noticing in mid-late game lately.

Sitting with me is Bamba, a super-short nomadic Brazilian. She’s moderately dressed, wearing red tights and a baggy grey knit sweater. I had seen her walking around with a sexual energy earlier in the day, and knew we would eventually meet at the square.

We're now having a beer on a rooftop patio that overlooks Cusco. The sun is setting and the view of the city is nothing short of breathtaking. As usual, fireworks pop off in the distance every so often, complimenting the growing illumination.

Bamba and I have been talking about our past, and now I approach a new conversation topic:

FOG: what do you see when you look in the mirror?
BAMBA: i see myself.
FOG: right…well im sure you’d agree that there’s more to yourself than what you see in the mirror. There’s your whole inner sense of self.
BAMBA: you remind me of my friend…

She goes on to explain that she’s had deep conversations with this friend of hers. And, she misses these conversations.

All this tells me something important. I've tipped her over and now she's in the beginning stages of making a decision about going home with me. Every girl goes home with me for a certain reason. And with Bamba, this is HER reason. I met a need for her: giving her a connection that she’s been longing for.

Minutes later, she asks me why I approached her. I recall the cold read from my initial approach…and tell her I was really curious to discover more about why she's like that. Then, I cover all the ways she’s showed me she’s like that over the course of our time together.

Her question about my intentions shows she's finalizing her decision to come back to mine…and to make her decision, she needs attainability from me. With more attainability built, it provides a sturdy platform to move on and proactively handle sexual objections...and eventually, transition into heavy sex talk.

Finally, she’s reached the end of her drink. I ask her what we should do now. She says, let’s head back towards the square.

Off we go. When we reach the square, she starts to wonder what she’s gonna do for the rest of the night...and I use this opportunity to invite her back to my place.

Back at my place, we sit down on the couch. Then I go to the bathroom. When I return to the couch, she is leaning into me.

FOG: are you shy?
BAMBA: no.

I lean in and kiss her. Later, I let her go…as there is sexual indifference between us.
 
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fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
LOCKINS

Got a couple of girls locked in: Aunza and Kalize.

Aunza - When I got back to Cusco after my one month Lima trip, I texted Aunza. She was warm but quickly dismissed me as soon as there was a misunderstanding between us. I probed into it and her surface level objection was that she thought I was going back to Canada and had forgotten about me

Going deeper, it turns out she was afraid of starting to like me if we continued talking. We set some ground rules and now we're fucking a lot

When I first started seducing her I told her a story about my friend who was in Cusco but was going back to Canada in a few days. She mixed me up with my friend, which is why she thought I was going back to Canada.

Kalize - Me and Kalize were just getting into it in Lima...and then I decided to go back to Cusco.

A couple weeks after I got back to Cusco, I messaged her to see how she was doing…and she wasn’t in a great state of mind, saying she wanted to leave Lima to find better work opportunities. She was thinking about escaping to Cusco.

So we met in Cusco. Spent some time together, the sex was great! Being with this girl triggers a cascade of emotions within me I haven’t felt in a long time, and she feels the same.

She’s living in a [relatively] closeby city right now and we talk every day. Gonna see her soon :)
 
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fog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 20, 2015
Messages
1,533
Location
peru
The Ideal Self, Part 1 - Theory

This year in my seductions I've been experimenting with a psychological concept called the ideal self. I've found discussing it to be the most powerful way I currently know of to stimulate certain types of women. This post will focus on basic theory I compiled. Later posts will highlight techniques/gambits I developed from this theory, along with field experience.

The ideal self is what the person hopes to be in life. It manifests as an image of themselves when they have achieved their current dreams, aspirations, wishes and fantasies.

When an individual consciously engages with aspects of their current dreams, aspirations, wishes, and fantasies, they also evaluate themselves on their capability of achieving them. If they feel capable, they feel positive and get a boost to their self-efficacy. This triggers a sense of hope for achieving them, fueling the creation of the image of a desired future.

Once the ideal self is activated, it monitors and guides all actions and decisions towards:

1) The emergence of a new state of being with self actualization as a core quality. This is evident in yourself or others knowing you are acting with character and consistent with one’s values.

2) The maintenance of a current character (i.e. way of being) or state or condition in life or work, with increased clarity and mindfulness.

When the ideal self is realized, the person has a peak experience, and they feel elated and aroused.

Further Reading

The Ideal Self As The Driver of Intentional Change
Peak Experience
 

fog

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The Ideal Self, Part 2 - Opening Gambit

This gambit is called “Who You Wanna Be”. It’s specifically for daygame and functions as an opener.

It’s where you give her a perspective on her self…specifically her ideal self.

It’s very impactful. Girls make comments that it feels like:
  • a spiritual experience
  • a huge coincidence
  • something really special to them
Where does this impact come from? As mentioned in part 1, the ideal self encompasses a big part of identity, and achieving it is an emotionally profound experience. This gambit speaks directly to her self-concept and plays on the current alignment of her current self and future self. If there’s any alignment there, it gives her a boost of self esteem and brings her closer to a peak experience…thus triggering powerful emotions.

Here’s how it goes…

FOG: hey. I have something important to tell you
HB: lets hear it!
FOG: you have plans for who you wanna be right? Like the best version of yourself.
HB: yes.
FOG: well you’re not there yet but…I get this sense you’re well on your way.
HB: *blushing*
FOG: like you’re getting closer and closer…and when you get there it will be amazing, like you’ll be a whole new person and all your dreams will have come true… its easy to imagine how it will feel. probably pretty good right?
HB: yeah!

The general structure is this:
  1. reference their best self,
  2. encourage and motivate them on it, and
  3. highlight the peak experience of accomplishing their best self.
Sexual Transition

Because this gambit delivers a lot of emotions, it's natural to transition into a sexual topic right after. This gets girls horny quickly into the interaction.

FOG: not everyone is like this though, some people have no plans for who they wanna be….and you know what ive noticed about these people?
HB: what?
FOG: it’s that they can easily become who society wants them to be. like when they’re faced with a decision to be their own person, or to follow the herd, they follow the herd. And as time goes on, they’re no longer their own person…instead, they’ve become the person that their friends, parents or the media want them to be.
HB: so true!
FOG: like with my friend, she grew up in a really religious household. Her parents were very controlling of her, and you know what’s happened to her?
GIRL: what?
FOG: now she’s just broken up with her boyfriend and she’s seeing a new guy. It’s going really well, like they have an amazing connection. But she’s worried that if she takes the next step with him, she’s gonna feel ashamed of herself. And it’s because growing up, her parents made her feel shame for expressing her sexuality. I don’t think it’s fair that she feels shame just for wanting to have a pleasurable experience, you know?

Notes
  • Regarding the fantasy archetypes, it works well on princesses.
  • It doesn’t work as well on girls who: lean towards living in the moment, feel like they’re going nowhere or are suicidal.
  • Girls who are suicidal will let you know right away!
  • The initial screen can be adapted to be more relevant to the girls who live in the moment ie “do you have plans for who you wanna be, or do you live in the moment?
 

fog

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Showing Medium Interest After Text Transitions

It’s a good technique to escalate after transitioning to a new phase. Escalating directly after a transition is completely natural and increases its potency. For example, Bacchus introduces sexual frames immediately after isolating a girl.

It’s also appropriate to do this digitally too, for example when transitioning from an app to a phone number. Right after the icebreaker texts on the new channel… is a common time to receive medium signs of interest from a girl. So, keep a watch out for this and aim to employ it yourself!
 

HammerEditor

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I'm not sure I have the time to read this entire journal, but I just came across it randomly.

I feel like I'm similar to where you started in 2015, except I had even less experience with girls than that to begin with. Have never been on a date yet or kissed a girl, even though I just turned 25.

I had at least 20 easy opportunities to talk to chicks throughout college but I always froze up, because deep down, I didn't feel like I deserved sex or especially love. Sometimes I didn't even see their signals or auto-ignored their AI's.

But just from scanning your thread, seeing proof that a guy who started 'late' could get excellent results in the end made me more secure that I can get success in game after a few months.

I eventually got most of these negative thoughts out of my head. I started daygame 3 months ago, will start doing regular nightgame today with bros, will get online in 1-2 weeks.

I do think a huge difference for me now compared to your starting point is Tinder is now over-saturated. Not to get nerdy, but it's like Bitcoin where the difficulty doubles every 2 years. Back in 2015/2016 it was easy for average photos to get plenty of matches. That's why I got a professional shoot, will get them rated and also try other apps.

I'll set a goal for myself to read one page of your journal a day because I really like how you 'showed your work'.
 

fog

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Healing Sex

Healing sex is a sexual dynamic underneath the PPP archetype. Although I knew it existed for some time, I had yet to experience it. Until recently.

It happened when I reconnected with an old canadian fwb. We started falling into a relationship type thingy and she flew to argentina to visit me.

After a bit of time together she revealed something to me. She was expecting me be abusive towards her because of her past relationships. But my gentle nature was challenging those expectations. Leading her to be a little confused about what was going on!

I reassured her and continued to act in healthy ways, helping her come into new understandings of how a relationship should be.

And one night soon after as we were fucking...she told me I was healing her.

It was a really interesting flavor of sex to explore.
 

fog

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Started seeing a new girl for over a month now. She’s a 19 year old argentine. We care about each other a lot. She’s been pushing for exclusivity but I keep putting it off.

I had to be patient to lay her. It took 3 hours of talking to pull her. She had a couple main resistances: safety and being pumped n dumped. I just kept fractionating between addressing the resistances and discussing other topics till she made her decision to come home with me.
 

Atlas IV

Space Monkey
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Hey fog, I just created this account to message you. Been a GC reader for many years, practicing mainly day game and some night game. I've only just recently gotten into the forums, and one of the first things I came across was this journal of yours, which I find super interesting and full of useful and inspiring material.

I'm not sure if you're still living in Colombia, but I'm actually in Manizales right now, headed to Medellin this week (part of a bigger LatAm trip). Would love to meet and grab a coffee if you're around! Send me a DM. Cheers.
 

fog

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went out for nightgame last night. walking to the bar around twelve i met this girl on the boardwalk closeby

it took about 10 minutes to pull her. topics discussed included flirt cultures n 8 orgasm types

no resistance. the doggy was ahmazing
 
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