New Breakthroughs , New problems

[Spyce D]

So , since I posted the post .

Thread 'Getting flaked repeatedly !!' https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/getting-flaked-repeatedly.28445/

I changed a lot about my game that lead me to 7 number closes , 2 insta dates , 1 date , 1 instagram in 10 outings ( around 40-50 approaches ) .

I have improved a lot in past 2-3 months than I did in first 6 months of my pickup journey .

But after having a reall successful February ( 4 dates on 4 Sundays ) .... Right now , even though I number closed 4 chicks on all the 3 outings of this month .

I got flaked by one but blocked by 2 even though we had some texting going on ( with one , texting was so good that it felt like a slap on the face ) . Blocking generally happened the next day of texting .

Anyways , I dont know if it's a game related issue or fundamentals ... Cuz my approach to conversation ratio has gotten higher as well .

And when I get a number from attractive chick , it usually flakes .

It's gotten easier to solid close a cutish girls but not actually cute girls . But , I have unlocked a level that earlier I could not be able to have decent convo with attractive chicks but now I am able to talk with them while being grounded .



I am still in the grind .

I have improved but now new problems have arose . Haha.

I also am working on my inner beliefs too , cuz I feel this inner resistance infield that stops me from taking the action I can take .

I don't know if I am still a beginner or an intermediate now .

But everytime I go out , I am pushing farther outside of my comfort zone .... Like I had a goal of getting 2 numbers in one outing and I achieved that , I had a goal of Going on dates every sunday which I achieved in February .

I also had a goal of number closing ever outing which I am currently achieving since last 3 outings.

So , it's not all doom .




But even though All this change in action has brought change in results ... maybe it's time to change more.

 

[FunGuy]

You are getting a lot more dates now so keep up the good work! Take note of the changes that you are making which are producing improved results.

I took a look at your thread for "Getting Flaked Repeatedly" and you received great advice in that thread. I'm curious to learn what you are doing differently now vs what you were doing back then. It would be useful to know for future reference and for those of us who are trying to learn as well. For instance these parts here:

I changed a lot about my game that lead me to 7 number closes , 2 insta dates , 1 date , 1 instagram in 10 outings ( around 40-50 approaches ) .

I have improved a lot in past 2-3 months than I did in first 6 months of my pickup journey .

But after having a reall successful February ( 4 dates on 4 Sundays ) .... Right now , even though I number closed 4 chicks on all the 3 outings of this month .

What changes did you make to your game and what did you improve on? I know that these are the tips you received in the previous topic so would be cool to know how you are implementing them:

1. Add structure to your game by Karea as he advised against using spontaneous conversations
2. Provide more context for your number closes like implying future meetups etc by Bill and he also advised to qualify more and he gave more details about getting the phone number
3. Number close routine by Skills which goes into details about getting the number and starting up the conversation

Have you been implementing their advice?

Also I just wanted to highlight something that stood out to me. I have a feeling that you might not be compliance testing enough so just wanted to emphasize that because imo compliance testing is critical in gauging interest levels. I quoted some stuff that stood out to me:

I got flaked by one but blocked by 2 even though we had some texting going on ( with one , texting was so good that it felt like a slap on the face ) . Blocking generally happened the next day of texting .

"Texting compliance" is not a good indication of general compliance so don't read much into it. Girls will text you just because their bored, too nice to turn you down, or simply because they like attention. Imo its better to focus on generating compliance BEFORE you get the phone number as those compliance tests will be the ones that actually matter.

Anyways , I dont know if it's a game related issue or fundamentals ... Cuz my approach to conversation ratio has gotten higher as well .

And when I get a number from attractive chick , it usually flakes .

On average how long are your interactions? If they are long like 7+ minutes and they are actually giving you their number then its probably a game related issue and not something with fundamentals but its very hard for us to assess without actually knowing what is happening in the interactions. Do you have any compliance tests that you throw out to gauge whether the interaction is going well before you go for number closes?

 

[Spyce D]

@FunGuy I will give you a detailed reply but it's 2 in the morning and I was handling a situation with a girl over text.

I had number closed her last Friday . It was purely situational Inside a very small restaurant .

So , I begin talking to her over texts , and when I asked her out ... She had asked me why I wanted to meet her . Which I passed it as a shit test ...

And right now I had long texting session with her .... I had a breakthrough today ... I was able to convey intent without exactly telling it and initially I had thought that she was "naive" but she turned out to be very liberal .

But here is the thing I will meet up in April cuz college exams .

As I asked her out again , she again asked why do I want to meet her . I said " do I need a reason " . She said " yes " . I said " why " . She said " you got a bad choice " .

I never did this before but I was like fuck it . I cant meet up her till April . So , I just texted her " I just found you a bit cute and the way we had convo ... I was curious

If you think otherwise then it's fine . I won't text you again ."

It was a last resort cuz she had been pestering me with why I want to meet her .

And guess what gamble worked .

After a few texts of misunderstanding .

She texted " I also find you cute ok " .

Damn . A new Breakthrough right now .

Now it's easier for me to think about this set .

 

[Spyce D]

You are getting a lot more dates now so keep up the good work! Take note of the changes that you are making which are producing improved results.

Thanks man .

changes did you make to your game and what did you improve on? I know that these are the tips you received in the previous topic so would be cool to know how you are implementing them:

Earlier I used to completely focus on banter and getting her to laugh .

But then I changed to having a bit of platonic conversations / also deep diving with emotional spikes .., not with every girl .... But this lead me to generally having lot more minimum of 5-10 minute convos .... 15 -20 minutes convos are now common for me .

The reason for this was that I was so done getting instagram and flakes that I decided that I should just what I can do during the approach only .

This lead to me to seeing cold approach as opportunity to meet women there itself rather than just to get numbers .

I started focusing more on getting insta dates ( even though I was struggling to even get numbers )


Now this lead to having numbers , insta dates , knowing her logistics better , seeding for future dates.

I did add some structure but with spontaneous stuff . I am still learning this part . It's a bit hard to remember everything to do when you are in the set and she throws you curve balls .


And I do test compliance . But I think I am lacking in this part too .

And I do seed for future plans before asking for numbers , even though girls may seem positive about the idea but some of them flake ( not everyone tho )

Texting compliance" is not a good indication of general compliance so don't read much into it. Girls will text you just because their bored, too nice to turn you down, or simply because they like attention. Imo its better to focus on generating compliance BEFORE you get the phone number as those compliance tests will be the ones that actually matter.

Yeah . You are right I guess. But the thing is with the one girl I had great texts , there was some compliance like I opened her on the platform , the. As the metro arrived , she came with me to sit with me in the general coach ( there is a women's coach here in metros ) .

But yeah , I could do better .

Few things I have noticed now is that sometimes I get " I am curious " eyes in a set , I would be talking to her but she rather than just talking back would also look at me with expectations that I will speak more / maybe stimulate her more .


And whenever I go up to girls who are not that attractive ( they are cute enough so as to speak ) ... My inner belief is that she might get clingy ....

But whenever I go up to attractive chicks , my subconscious is like hoping she won't flake.

Thats why in general attractive girls have been more flaky with me .


Maybe , I have some inner stuff to work on here .


Tbh , It could be game issue cuz I am getting 20 minute convos with some girls then they flake. I am going to make my game for sharp then .

But something inside me tells that it's also inner game issue .

But the thing with inner game is experience leads to beliefs in game.

Now , cuz attractive chicks flake on me so that leads to a mindset that attractive chicks will flake so when I go up to them ... They generally do. .

But funny thing is I never believed that they won't talk to me , so maybe that's why I am able to convos with them .

I can't think straight , tbh .

Lot of stuff has happened .

Lot of success , lot of close successes , lot of lessons .

Yesterday's success has become today's failure .

Anyways , I don't think I can quit game now . My mind won't allow it .


Here is also the issue that I only game once per week , so maybe that's why I am progressing slowly , and seeing these failures as big ... But if had been gaming 4-5 times a week . It would have been a different story .

Anyways I guess I am simply paying my dues , ig

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://www.girlschase.com/content/pay-your-dues-approach-incredible-social-skills&ved=2ahUKEwiz4-rTh_iEAxUke2wGHW-2Bl8QFnoECA4QAQ&usg=AOvVaw1I5O2_KcV2Toc05i9GHmvj