Observations "Marriage". A girl friend complacency and how We can manage this. :)

[trashKENNUT]

An ex girlfriend is getting married in February.

I felt abit, i felt sad but then, i look again, "Isn't that the guy who dump her on and off?" and i was like yeap, there he is. Before some guys curse me if i have something against marriage, i will like to note that i believe in "Never say Never", but let's go on this.

Where Complacency lies? Beliefs.

I realize something. We all believe that life is hard, and we must struggle and fight. Am i right? Yeap we getting that.

What if we examine our beliefs? If you say that you love to have lots of sex with girls but then you do otherwise. This means you don't believe it.

To all our PUA community, let's ask ourselves, If we are against marriage, Doesn't marriage be the point of Focus?

Our beliefs determine much of our lifes, even in our own perception. So becareful of what you wish for or what you fight against, or what is going on most in your head. Words are nothing. It's your focus, your perception, your expectations. It's what you perceive "about or against" most of the time, that makes your life complacent and you don't even know it.

Zac

 

[Chase]

Zac-

So becareful of what you wish for or what you fight against, or what is going on most in your head. Words are nothing. It's your focus, your perception, your expectations. It's what you perceive "about or against" most of the time, that makes your life complacent and you don't even know it.

Zac

Very good observation. The advice "Choose your battles wisely" is pertinent here; it's all too easy to get bogged down fighting the world when you take too many things on as your duty to fight.

The best thing to do is pick one or two things you feel absolutely need to change, and fight them with all your energy, while ignoring all the rest. Remember to fight them with structural change in your society if they're truly important; people have been getting upset about other people's behaviors since time immemorial, and all its done is waste mental energy and ruin their own calm. People do what their environments are structured to push, compel, or allow them to do; you will never succeed at changing people by trying to change people, you must change the environment around those people if you want the people themselves to change.

So, for instance, if a man thinks marriage is vile and must be destroyed, something important for him will be making sure that the state subsidizes women well enough, and taxes men effectively enough that it can provide federal subsidies to women so that they can raise children on their own without requiring commitment from men. Without an alternate source of support for the members of society who are raising the next generation of society, those members must rely directly on the members of society who are producing wealth - the woman marries the man and gets resources from him directly, or the woman marries the state and the state gets resources from the man, but civilization requires one of these to happen in order to function and not extinct itself out or devolve into anarchy. A man cannot get rid of marriage by telling people to stop marrying, but he CAN get rid of marriage by campaigning to have the state provide more social support to women, as you'll see in all the countries where marriage is breaking down and going away the most.

(personally, I'm indifferent to the "pro-marriage / anti-marriage" stuff; if a state wants to tax me more and allow women to be independent and reproduce with me without requiring me to marry them, I actually think this is ideal, and it's a much better system for a guy like me than a monogamous marriage state where each man only gets to breed with one woman; however, if a state doesn't provide much social welfare to women, and women thus require marriage, I'm fine giving them that if it's needed for the early child-rearing years)

Chase